#alien contactee

‘’George Van Tassel INTEGRATRON is a machine that was intended to prolong life, by way of electronic rejuvenation.  Van Tassel claimed to be an alien contactee, he stated that the Integratron technology was given to him from a Venusian in 1953.’’

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6eF6vTWdfGA)

Hello, fellow travelers – welcome to KCK14.

I'll let you know up front, the final two videos in this episode feature some of the most butthurt, crazy conspiratards I've yet encountered. Make sure you stick around for them.

We jump right into the fun with a video from Jesse Spots! After a winding, worthless diatribe about the nature of absurdity – the concept of which he only understands subconsciously – Jesse lets us know that Satan himself is the Father of this brand of comedy. Why, you might ask? Because Satan likes to turn everything upside down! Yeah, don’t fucking ask. Just watch this dummy.

After that, Mr. Cannon teaches us about the tactics of his local gangstalkers – it turns out that about three out of every four cars that passes him on the road is actually an Illuminati spy, targeting him by flashing having their headlights on or… having a red car… or having a headlight out. Yeah. The Illuminati is paying over three fourths of the global population to spy on and stalk the rest! Makes sense!

Our third video features Cindy Kay Currier, everyone’s favorite… nothing. She’s no one’s favorite at anything. As usual she has no charisma whatsoever, but it’s what she has to say that’s so intriguing – this time she’s taken a joke from Hillary Clinton about being a robot as a serious statement. She claims to be excited that Vanity Fair is reporting on this “controversy” after implying that Hill-dawg made the statement about being a robot to distract from the Benghazi scandal. Yup. Sounds about right.

The fourth video comes from TheAlienContactee and holy shite, it’s one of the best conspiratard vids I’ve ever seen. Dude is fired up from the word go, screaming into the camera and beating objects with a mean looking stick. Dressed up like a Batman villain, he informs us what a “toad terror” is – it’s a reptilian in full form, he shrieks angrily into the camera. The Pleiadian therapy he’s been receiving says the only way to get rid of his rage is to take it out on the reptilian scum that are in Washington. Yup, definitely not a candidate for any sort of NSA watchlist at all. Dude, keep making videos, you’re my new favorite.

The last video comes from an old buddy, Millerreport. I trawled his channel and clicked on a video, left him a comment about how much I liked him and gave it a thumbs up. Mind you, the video had 2 views at the time, and one was me. An hour later he posted an insane shrieking rant about how “half his listeners” are “tresonists”. The word you’re looking for is traitors, friend. This video is a classic and Millerreport, you are a new bright and shining star in my universe. We’ll definitely be seeing more of you. Kisses.