#aibou rambles

F: Share a snippet from one of your favourite dialogue scenes you've written and explain why you're proud of it.

Oh mannnn, I definitely have one! I'm actually going to answer this question in reverse order, starting with why I'm proud.

I'm choosing the interrogation dialogue from Ch. 5 of Journey (The Underground). I'm so fucking proud of it because I think I fully utilized the reason why I fucking love a limited POV on a fic. I love when things remain a mystery, but there are enough hints that the reader can at least make an educated guess, especially if they are perceptive enough.

The snippet I will be sharing is the part where John totally slips up and changes the gender of his "love interest." John's freaking the fuck out while Dave remains painfully oblivious. I had so much fun writing this!

In order to truly showcase the brilliance of this scene, I will share the same snippet from both Journey and Side B. Enjoy reading them side-by-side! :D

Journey (Dave's POV):

God, you really hate seeing that look on his face.  He should never look like that.  He should only be happy.  He fucking deserves to be happy, goddammit, and you will do everything in your power to make it so.  Even if it involves not being in a relationship with you.  You reach out your hand and flick him on the nose, causing his entire face to scrunch up like a rabbit.  God fucking dammit, if that son of a bitch isn’t the cutest thing you’ve ever seen.  “No, I don’t know.  Who wouldn’t want to take a ride on the wicked Egbert Sweet Lovin’ Express?  Already, this chick is starting to sound lame.”

John hesitantly looks up at you, a hint of a smile appearing on his lips.  He lets out another sigh before looking away again.  “That’s the thing though, Dave,” he says.  God, you hate how fucking dejected his voice sounds.  “They’re totally not lame.  Actually…he’s the coolest person I know.”

You raise an eyebrow when John suddenly stiffens again, a blush evident on his cheeks.  His eyes are wide for just a second before he shuts them tight.  It’s almost like he’s bracing himself for something terrible.

Wait…did you just miss something?

You let that thought go as you hang your arm over his shoulders, holding him a little closer.  Hopefully the shimmering of your cloaks and your shared scarf energy will help him relax.  You need him to relax first before you can get him to smile again-

Whoa holy fuck.  John actually flinches under your touch.  Whoa.  Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa.  He’s never recoiled from human contact before.  This must be bothering him more than you thought.

Okay.  Time to make him smile.  That’s your number one mission, Commander.  You’ve done it before, you can do it again.  You lift a hand to ruffle his hair.  “But that’s where you have it wrong, Egbert.  Obviously this chick’s the lamest fucking dipshit on the motherfucking planet.”  He instantly relaxes under your arm.  Oh good, your pep talk must be working.  “If she makes you feel that bad, that even thinking about being with her is a lost cause, then she’s not fucking worth your time.  Goddamn, if she weren’t a girl, I’d smack her square in the goddamn fucking face.”

You almost jump when John suddenly erupts into a fit of laughter.  Oh god, your heart is totally not picking up in double-time.  What is he laughing about?  Meh, you can’t find that you give a fuck at the moment.  All you care about is that he’s actually laughing.  Seriously, you could listen to this marvelous symphony all fucking day.  When he finally calms down, he turns his head to look at you once again.  He’s grinning, his eyes positively sparkling with that unfamiliar something that makes your heart start to change its fucking pace again.  Fuck yes.  Mission accomplished.  Everyone can go the fuck home now.

Time seems to stand still as you hold each other’s gaze.  God, you could look at him like this until the day you di-

Okay.  Enough corny fucking thoughts.  Time to go with Mission Number Two: find out who John’s crush is, even if it kills you inside.  You let your lips curl into a smirk as your raise your eyebrow.  “…You still need to tell me who it is, though.”

In a flash, John’s smile is gone.  His whole body violently tenses up again before he pushes you away, letting out an infuriated yell. The force of pushing you away causes him to bump into the stone behind him. 

Side B (John's POV):

Your heart skips a beat when Dave suddenly flicks you on the nose, causing your face to scrunch up at the feeling.  Wait, did he just chuckle?  Why would he do that?  God, you feel like you don’t know anything anymore!  “No, I don’t know,” he starts.  “Who wouldn’t want to take a ride on the wicked Egbert Sweet Lovin’ Express?  Already, this chick is starting to sound lame.”

Wow, he always seems to know what to say, doesn’t he?  If only he really knew.  You hesitantly look up at him.  Huh.  You don’t think you’ve ever seen this particular expression on his face before.  How do you describe it?  His mouth is still set in a straight line, but…it’s like there’s more to it.  It’s probably a look of curiosity or something like that.

You let out another sigh before looking away again.  “That’s the thing though, Dave.  They’re totally not lame.  Actually…he’s the coolest person I know.”

Fuck.

You did not just fucking say that.

Fuck your fucking life.

Goddammit, your face is starting to heat up.  You shut your eyes tight, bracing yourself for the worst.  Oh god.  There’s no way Dave could have possibly missed that particular change in pronouns!  He’s not that dense!  Oh god, everything is ruined forever.  You just know it.  How could you have been so stupid!

Shit, now Dave’s hanging his arm over your shoulder, holding you a little closer.  Fuck, now he’s really not going to let this go.  He’s going to tease you for being a big gay.  Shit.  Shit, shit, shit shit shit shi-

“But that’s where you’ve got it wrong, Egbert,” he says, his voice oddly calm.  “Obviously this chick’s the lamest fucking dipshit on the motherfucking planet.”

Holy.  Fucking.  Shit.  You think you’re going to faint with relief.  He seriously missed that?!  It was so obvious!  You even fucking said “he”!  Whether it’s some higher power looking out for you, or just shit dumb luck, you don’t even fucking give a shit.  You’re so thankful you can’t even.  Yes, that’s right.  You can’t even.

“If she makes you feel that bad, that even thinking about being with her is a lost cause, then she’s not fucking worth your time.  Goddamn, if she weren’t a girl, I’d smack her square in the goddamn fucking face.”

Oh god, that’s it.  You can’t hold it anymore.  You erupt into a fit of chortles, not caring that Dave is right next to you to hear how stupid it sounds.  Holy shit, this is getting way too ironic!  Now your mind’s full of images of Dave punching himself in the face.  Oh god, just the thought is breaking you into another giggle fit.  Jesus, how does this stupid asshat always know how to say the most perfect fucking thing?  How does he always cheer you up just like that, as quick as a snap of the fingers?  It’s stupid and ridiculous and god you really fucking love this asshole.

When your laughter finally calms down, you turn your head to look at Dave once again and fuck.  He’s smiling.  Again!  Whoa, he’s been smiling a lot lately!  Does he even realize it?  Is he smiling because he knows that he somehow managed to cheer you up yet again?  Holy shit.

You swear time seems to stand still as you hold each other’s gaze.  Wow, you really could look at him like this, even with his stupid-ass shades on, forev-

His smile disappears, a menacing smirk taking its place as he raises an eyebrow.  Oh no.  This can’t be a good sign.  “…You still need to tell me who it is, though.”

Goddammit.  Your stomach sinks so low, you really think it could just plummet out of your body and fall to the ground.  You shove him away from you, an infuriated yell making its way past your lips as- You collide into something hard, like stone. 

J: Write or describe an alternative ending to [insert fic].

Since Journey is the only fic of mine that's out (that's both recent and completed), I'll be answering with that in mind.

This one's interesting, actually, as there was a slight difference in the ending. In Dave's POV, you wouldn't notice that much, but John's POV is where the real difference lies!

So, in every draft of Journey before the final one, John was immediately able to move his body with no issues. In fact, he's the one who initiates their first IRL kiss! Yeah, back when I wrote this 10 years ago, I was but a sweet summer child who seriously thought that waking up from a coma was like in the movies, where the patient just moves about like they woke up from a really long nap! Imagine my surprise when I discovered that wasn't the case!

It was when I had suffered my back falling apart, had surgeries, and developed foot drop (where I can't flex my foot) that I was inspired to write Recovery. I got 2 chapters in, and the more I wrote, the more and more I was triggered by the Epilogue in Journey. At first, I didn't do anything because I was a lazy bitch who also assumed that I would never post this. It was actually my editing the final draft of the Epilogue that inspired/motivated me to make the final edits for Journey/Side B as a whole!

V: If you could write the sequel (or prequel) to any fic out there not written by yourself, which would you choose?

Aaaahhh noooo you chose the hardest one! lmaooo Okay, here goes:

After looking through my bookmarks, I have settled on This is Your Burden by GoofyGodTier (johnfightmelaurens). I don't know if this is cheating since this fic is unfinished. However, that's also why I'm choosing it. I believe I told you before on AO3 that Bullied!John is one of my weird guilty pleasures, probably because it usually produces a lot of Hurt/Comfort (for which I'm a dirty slut lmfao). This is Your Burden really checks a lot of the right boxes for me, and it makes me sad that it's incomplete as well as desperate for more. Now, how I would end it, I have no idea!