arisu stops in his tracks when he sees it: a small, white sign, sitting in the middle of a nearby subway entrance. the lights in the station are off. the stairs lead downwards into darkness. written on the sign, in thick, black lettering, reads three simple words: GAME ARENA AHEAD.

“we’re here,” rei remarks from behind him. she crosses her arms over her chest, shifting her weight between her feet. arisu stares straight ahead, eyes trained on the sign. 

arisu purses his lips. he swallows his fear, clenching his trembling hands into fists. fear has no place in the borderlands - especially not when he has people relying on him. instead, he pushes his anxiety down and takes a step closer. “let’s go in.” 

the arena is simple enough. the subway station is identical to all the others in tokyo, save for the lack of people. if arisu closes his eyes for long enough, he gets lost in time. 

it had been just after your first date. what was supposed to be a quiet dinner had accidentally become an hours-long outing. you had chatted in the restaurant until the wait staff began giving you looks and the migrated to the city streets, talking the night away beneath the moonlight. arisu held your hand for the first time that night. your skin felt warm in his as he interlinked your fingers. 

the station was quiet that night. it was the early hours of the morning. night shift workers were just now returning. stars still twinkled brightly in the night sky. clubs began turning the music down as drunken crowds filtered out into the night, waiting to be picked up by awaiting taxis. 

but arisu was on a subway, holding your hand. he bit his lip to hide his smile to little avail. you hid your own behind your hand, trying to avoid eye contact with the businessman judging you in the corner and the nurse resting against the window. that was the night arisu knew: he never wanted to let you go. 

but that day felt like lifetimes ago. years had passed since that moment. now, arisu stood in that same, empty subway with a pit in his stomach and the promise of death awaiting. 

the subway arrives quietly. it comes to a slow stop on its wheels; the machinery sighing beneath its own weight. behind him, arisu shares a nervous glance with shion. she simply shrugs her shoulders, looking towards the opened doors. 

“do we go on?” natsu asks. she glances around the group for confirmation that doesn’t come. “i mean, the doors are open.” 

tetsu is the one who moves first. with a deep sigh, he warners forwards, taking a step onto the subway. “no sense in staying here,” he says. silently, arisu follows. he steps over the gap, following tetsu into the car. the others filter in as well, grabbing onto the handrails or leaning against the walls. 

the game was simple enough. move between subway cars. wear a gas mask. decide between life or death. arisu bites his tongue. lets others speak. pushes his thoughts of you away just long enough to focus on the game. there has to be a way to win, after all. the creators don’t leave anything simply to chance. 

it had started easy. put the mask on, insert the canister, hold your breath. arisu keeps his eyes trained on the caged canary, letting the little yellow bird confirm their decisions. it was easier than watching the newfound friends he had made. makino squeezes her eyes shut each time, clinging to the cool metal railing. rei pretends to be unaffected, but he can see how her hands tremble slightly. nobu stands perfectly still, eyes closed, but breathing steadily, as if he’s accepted his fate. 

the doors fly open with a crash as the gas clears. arisu blinks. the bird lays on the bottom of the cage - dead. two more cars. one canister left. arisu waits for a few moments, then removes his mask. the others follow suit, hesitantly taking in small breaths of the air. then-

“arisu!” it’s you. your voice almost sounds foreign after days of missing you. the sound is so quiet he almost misses it. the wind beating against the subway’s doors echoes throughout the tunnel, loud enough that it drowns out almost every other noise but you persist. you yell louder now. desperate. “arisu!” 

arisu’s eyes widen. his heart leaps into his throat. his breath catches as he gasps, stumbling towards the gap in the door. he barely remembers to grab onto the railing, clumsily holding it with one hand. 

the wind sounds louder than ever when he leans out of the doors, desperate to be closer to you. you’re wearing the clothes you had left in that morning, though now they’re more tattered and dirty. you scramble towards the doors, mimicking his own actions. you reach your hand out, reaching towards him. 

arisu blinks his tears away. he thinks of tempting fate - jumping across the gap despite everything that tells him he won’t make it there - but quickly abandons the idea. there’s no sense in being dead. especially not here. 

your fingertips just barely brush against his own. after so long, your touch feels electric. and then, just as soon as it was there, it’s ripped away once again. 

it happens in a flash. “watch out!” nobu’s voice rings in arisu’s ears. there’s a pair of arms around his middle, tugging him backwards. arisu only catches a flash of the pillar the subway blows past. the tracks split around it, sending your subway turning to the side whilst arisu’s continues barrelling forwards. 

“no!” arisu scrambles back to his feet, but it’s too late. your subway is gone, replaced now by a flashes of the wall as it rushes past. he takes a shaky breath, leaning his head against the side of the subway doors. “no,” he whispers. 

hesitantly, nobu rests his hand against arisu’s shoulder. he offers a few comforting pats. arisu appreciates the gesture despite how awkward and stilted the movement is. “it’s okay, arisu,” nobu says. “we’ll find them again.” 

“he’s right,” makino is by his side now, kneeling down on her knees. she holds her hands out as she coaxes arisu back to his feet in that comforting way only she can. her hands feel warm despite the cold air. “we won’t stop looking, i promise. but we need to go, now.” 

arisu’s chest tightens. he grits his teeth, standing up on shaky legs despite himself. he can’t give up now. not when he’s this close. “okay,” he nods. “let’s go.” 

notes: please leave feedback if you enjoyed!! so happy s3 is finally here, kento yamazaki how i love you so, getting back into my aib phase prepare to be sick of me, title from NCT U - faded in my last song

Your husband wasn’t a murderer. He was sweet and kind and one of the best people you could have in your life. Not once in your dating or married life had he ever given you any signal of being anything less than good.

Now seeing him like this, dressed in a grey jumpsuit and handcuffed to a metal table… it didn’t even look real.

"Please tell me it's not true."

He said nothing, cold brown eyes looking into yours as he raised a brow in response. You had been in this room with him for five minutes, and that’s all he could give you? No ‘I’m sorry’, no ‘I’m innocent, this is a mistake’, no nothing?

Your breathing shuddered as you tried not to erupt into tears. You had to keep your cool right now, no matter what.

"Sunato... did you- did you do something to those women?"

He let out a sigh before finally saying, "Ask me what you really want to ask."

You didn't have it in you to say the words. Not right now, not with the photos of the crimes so clear in your mind. You had seen the vacant eyes, the bloody skin, and the marks left on the lifeless bodies of young women that your husband had supposedly killed. No, not supposedly; there was too much evidence. He had confessed. He was guilty. You knew he was. But you had to hear him say it.

"Did you murder them?" you asked in a whisper, looking into his eyes. Eyes that looked like bottomless pits of darkness, so empty of the warmth and love that used to be directed at you. But not now.

You wondered if these were the eyes that those women had seen before he made them bleed to death. A shiver ran through you at the thought.

"Do you think I murdered them?" he asked instead.

"No!” you shouted with a slap on the metal surface, hands trembling as you fisted them under the table. With a deep breath, you begged, “Don't play games with me right now...."

An eternity seemed to pass by before he said the words you were dreading to hear.

"Yes."

Who knew that such a simple word could crumble your world?

You couldn't stop yourself from letting out a sob then, covering your eyes with your hands as fat tears streamed down your face. You could almost hear your heart break in two. How could he have done this? How could he confess such sins to you in such a calm tone, like you were the stupid one for not noticing it in the first place?

His next question made you wonder if he could read your mind.

"But you knew, didn't you?"

"I- what?..."

"You knew," he repeated. "You just chose not to believe it."

"How could you say-"

"You caught me washing blood off my clothes so many times,” he said with a shake of his head like he couldn’t believe you. “The nights I got home late, the scratches on my arms… C'mon, love, you are many things, but you're not dumb. You knew what I was doing before anyone else did."

"No, I-"

You had no idea. Of that, you were sure. Yes, you had seen him wash his clothes, and seen the scratches on his skin, and wondered about the late nights… but you had just shrugged it off as normal occurrences. You had never seen any blood, nor you ever had any reason to suspect him of doing anything foul. Cheating? Yes, that had crossed your mind, but never murder. But weren't the signs there? You actually didn’t know, or did you just choose not to see what was in front of you all this time?

"No,” you vehemently shook your head, face contorting as more tears streamed down your face. “I didn't know, you can't possibly believe-"

"If that's what makes you feel better, so be it," he said with a shrug. “But you can’t fool me, love.”

Somehow, those words hurt more than anything else. This man in front of you wasn't your husband. He was a stranger, a twisted version of the man that had been the love of your life since you were a teenager.

You never thought you could hate him as much as you loved him.

"Why did you do it?" you asked after another moment of silence.

"Because I could."

You let his words sink in. Then, another thought crossed your mind, this one making the blood in your veins run cold.

"Ever thought of… of doing the same to me?"

The smile he gave you was enough for you to know the answer.

"You were supposed to die on the first time we met," he started, gaze far away as he remembered, a mock of a fond smile on his lips. "I had it all planned out. You were supposed to be my first actual kill. But then I just," he paused there, letting out a long sigh before locking his gaze back on yours, "I just really liked you, I guess."

You didn't know what to say after his confession. You wanted to scream and cry, hit him until he was dead and bleeding, and make him regret not killing you in the first place. But you couldn't do that to the man you still loved.

So, you stood up and signaled the guard right outside the door. Without another glance at your husband, you walked out of the room, hesitating when you reached the threshold.

"Was it ever genuine?" you asked without turning to look at him. "Did you ever love me?"

A chuckle sounded behind you.

it wasn't supposed to go this way. a clubs game was supposed to be easy ; you were all supposed to live. but, here you were, friendless and alone. you let out a choked sob and keep running, knowing you'd die next if you stopped.

with a thud, you fall to the floor. on top of you is a pierced guy, eyes wide and calculating. he pants, "we need to move."

now teamless, you listen to the stranger. you grab his wrist, leading him right instead of left. "bad down that way."

you pant as you press your back to the wall behind you, eyeing the dark hallways. your mental map was failing you, unable to tell you where was safe and where you'd find danger. you look to the man, "any ideas?"

he holds out the rifle he'd been carrying, "go out guns blazing?"

you laugh quietly, grin pointed to the floor. "we'll keep that as a back-up, okay?"

niragi slowly lowers his weapon. truly, he thought it'd be easier to get rid of you - be the only survivor and the only winner. now, though - he wanted to hear you laugh more. wanted to see the way your smile truly looked, with proper lighting.

he gulps before nodding, "you have any ideas, then?"

"well," you let out a huff. pointing up to the ceiling, you shrug. "we haven't tried that way yet."

——♥︎—— i never know how to write niragi lmao so i hope this was alright <3

your hand falls lower, now running down his neck and tracing against the edge of his shoulder. your fingertips trace against the curve of his collarbones and dance along the skin of his bare chest. arisu flinches slightly and then stirs at the feeling. though he doesn’t open his eyes, you don’t miss the way a deep flush spreads across his cheeks and the tips of his ears. 

goosebumps rise along arisu’s skin as your hand trails even lower before finally settling against his waist. you trace miscellaneous shapes against his skin, taking the time to admire the man before you. arisu’s lips have curved upwards slightly into the faintest smile. 

you shuffle across the sheets, closing the gap between your bodies. leaning in, you press a chaste kiss against the corner of his lips. “good morning,” you whisper.

arisu squeezes his eyes shut. he groans quietly as he wraps his arms around your waist, finally opening his eyes. he squints, doing his best to make out your figure before him despite his tiredness. “can i have a real kiss?” 

you hum, pulling away slightly. arisu reacts almost immediately, tightening his grip around your waist ever so slightly. “i don’t know, ryohei,” you say teasingly. you cup his face between your hands, holding his jaw between your fingertips. arisu’s gaze flickers down to your lips momentarily before returning to your eyes. “you haven’t even said good morning yet.” 

arisu pauses, then smiles. he chuckles softly as he wraps his arms around you, tugging you into a tight hug. this time it’s him who reaches up to cup your cheek as he leans in to rest his forehead against your own. “good morning,” he murmurs. he barely waiting a second before he’s pulling you close, finally pressing his lips against your own. 

that night, arisu sat on the ledge of the school’s roof for hours. he contemplated jumping, a few times, but talked himself out of it. it was too much spectacle. too much pressure. too little guarantee. and, despite it all, arisu ryohei didn’t really want to die. 

karube joined him sometimes, chota almost never. but it was a habit arisu had kept up on especially late nights after everyone else logged off of his games and he was left with nothing to shield him from the darkness. and now, more than ever, he found himself returning to his routine. 

returning to the borderland was never part of arisu’s plan. truthfully, he had forgotten about the experience. being hit by a meteor was easier to handle than the constant promise of death and loss. arisu had moved on. he enrolled into a university and attended class regularly. he found work at a shitty convenience store. at least once a month, he bought flowers and returned to a nearby graveyard, updating karube and chota on his life. 

and yet, here he was, stuck in the inbetween once again. 

arisu had slipped away seemingly without notice. the mall was big and newly renovated but without the lights overhead it was easy to disappear. your group had made a makeshift shelter in the center of the room, adjacent to a non-working fountain. 

your friends had sprawled out across the floor, some curled up together while others sought solitude. nobu was the closest to you. he had balled up his baby blue jacket, using the fabric as a makeshift pillow. shion and natsu sat on a set of nearby steps, their conversation muffled by their soft voices. itsuki pushed more noodles into yuna’s bowl, ignoring her whines that he should eat more. but arisu was nowhere to be seen. 

stars had always been a rarity in tokyo. light pollution took their place, blocking them from view. however, with no power in the borderland, they shone brightly above. arisu found himself lost in thought, tracing constellations with his eyes. he sends a silent thank you to his physics professor who had pushed him to take an astrophysics class when she complimented his “passion for space.” 

arisu hears you coming before you arrive. your footsteps, albeit quiet, still break through the quiet of the night. he turns slightly, watching as you slowly make your way towards him. “what’s on your mind?” 

arisu sighs. he turns away from you and back towards the sky. at his silence, you take a seat beside him, so close that your shoulders brush. you don’t push him to reply. instead, you stare up at the sky alongside him, waiting until he’s ready. 

“i just…” he begins quietly. arisu looks down, eyes focusing on the sidewalk below. the drop isn’t far. stones have been placed in a criss-cross pattern across the ground. they’re only slightly worn down from use, coated in dirt from where crowds of people have spent months walking over them. “i didn’t think i’d ever be here again. i thought it was all over. but now… “

you hum in acknowledgement. no amount of comforting speeches will make the pit in arisu’s stomach disappear. the borderland had no mercy and it makes no promises. instead, you shift closer ever so slightly, just enough to rest your head against his shoulder. 

“we’ll make it though,” you say, your voice soft and sweet. you reach over and take arisu’s hand into your own like it’s nothing - like he’s someone that deserves to be held. your fingertips draw miscellaneous shapes against his calloused hands, hardened not by labour, but stifled under the weight of his father’s expectations.

arisu stills. for just a moment, he allows himself to relax. a shaky breath escapes his lips. the weight of the world slips momentarily, the burden now shared. he counts the seconds passing between your heartbeats. he feels the heat of your skin resting against his own.

you’re looking up at him when he opens his eyes once again. reality comes back into focus after a few rapid blinks. the pit in arisu’s stomach returns with it. but you’re still there. you his hands despite the blood he’s shed. you let him lean against your chest even though he stiffens at the contact. and you cradle his face with a gentleness he had thought died alongside his mother. 

hesitantly, arisu interlaces his fingers with yours. he gives your hand a reassuring squeeze, smiling at you despite it all. his voice drops to a whisper, words spoken only for your ears to hear. “together,” he murmurs. 

“together,” you reaffirm. 

notes: please leave feedback if you enjoyed!! i had like half of an idea for this and then it turned into whatever this is, there's gay subtext here if you squint, lowkey insecure arisu, supposed to be set during s3 when he's depressed about not finding usagi yet, lowkey depressed arisu, title from enhypen - no doubt

arisu freezes when you roll onto your side, moving even close to him in the process. it feels like the entire world shifts when you do. despite all of his effort, you’re impossible to ignore. “arisu,” you whisper. your voice cuts through the darkness, stealing his attention away from the intricate patterns engraved into the ceiling. the man twists just enough to face you, overly conscious of every movement he makes. “are you alright?”

arisu swallows. hard. he sends a silent prayer that the shake in his voice will disappear by the time he quietly murmurs, “i’m fine.”

the butterflies swarming throughout his stomach only seem to increase when you chuckle quietly. you smile softly. sweetly. “you don’t have to be so nervous, you know.” you reach up, gingerly resting a hand against his cheek. arisu’s skin feels hot against your palm as you trace your thumb against his cheekbone. “if you’re not ready to share a bed i can go find somewhere else to sleep. i’m sure kuina wouldn’t mind.”

“no! no- i-” arisu stutters. his face flushes an embarrassingly deep shade of red and his mind races. he desperately tries to remember whatever advice karube had drunkenly told him over rounds of cheap beer and ramen noodles. “please don’t go. i want this.” 

there’s a pause. arisu squeezes his eyes shut, waiting for you to say something. an apology lingers on the tip of his tongue, about to escape from his lips when you murmur- “good,” you smile. “i want this, too.” 

outside of your window, glass shatters. loud cheers fill the night as the party rages on with no regard for the time of night. arisu has never been a fan of parties, preferring to stand in the corner and watch as karube flirted with anyone who seemed interested or slipping outside under the guise of a “smoke break” with chota for some fresh air. 

you don’t seem to mind, however, as you shuffle ever so closer. your hand slips away from his face, leaving goosebumps in its wake. arisu frowns softly at the loss of warmth before you wrap your arm around his waist instead. 

beneath the cheap hotel blankets, you further entangle your body with arisu’s. he can’t seem to pull away. or, maybe he doesn’t want to. he hasn’t quite figured it out yet. 

but when you curl your body further against him, now leaning your head against his shoulder, he lets out a quiet breath. slowly, the tension in his body begins to slip away. his anxiety lessens with each passing moment until his heartbeat has calmed to a slow, rhythmic beating in his chest.

this time when he turns to face you, your eyes are closed. soft breaths occasionally leave your parted lips. tentatively, arisu brushes a shaky hand through your hair. he tucks a few stray strands behind your ear. 

with your features now exposed, he can see the way neon light streaming in despite the closed curtains dances across your cheeks. before arisu knows it, his lips have curled upwards into a soft smile. he lowers his hand until it rests against the curve of your waist, just below your rib cage. 

now finally comfortable, arisu allows himself to relax against the pillows. his own eyes flutter shut as the incessant pounding of the dj’s music begins to lull him to sleep. maybe he could get used to this.

you stare up into the darkness until your arm goes numb from being in the same position for so long. it’s still dark out when you glance over at your window. you sit up on your elbow, pushing yourself out of bed. the air is cold against your skin. you pull a shirt over your head and leave your room. it’s silent in the hotel, most people already sleeping by now.  

chishiya’s room is darker than yours when you enter. light from the hallway streams in for a second before you close the door behind you. he stays silent but you can tell he’s awake as you carefully enter the room. 

the sheets are cold when you slide underneath the covers, propping your head up underneath your hand. you can feel chishiya roll onto his side to face you. “did i wake you?” 

“no.” he reaches his hand out a little, gesturing for you to move closer. you eagerly accept, wrapping your arm around his waist and pressing yourself against his chest. his warmth feels nice against your skin. “rough night?” 

you hum as chishiya wraps his arms further around you. “couldn’t sleep. it feels like i’ve been awake for hours.” chishiya moves his hand to your jawline, gently stroking against the skin. you sigh, leaning into his touch. he moves his hand to the nape of your neck, fingernails gently massaging your scalp. the feeling calms you. slowly, your body relaxes as you fall asleep safe in chishiya’s arms.

‧₊˚✩ chishiya coming to sleep with you

(set after the borderlands, word count 258)

your cat blinks lazily at chishiya as he closes the door behind himself, careful not to shut it completely. you lay sprawled across your bed, deep asleep. he smiles a little, coaxing your cat to move so he can lay down. she dramatically yawns before moving down to curl up by your feet. 

chishiya slides underneath the blankets, wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you back into his chest. you unconsciously lean into him, shifting a little closer to his body. he presses a kiss against the nape of your neck before falling back asleep. 

chishiya’s arm is still wrapped around your waist when you wake up. you turn onto your side, taking the time to admire him. his hair is messy, sprawled across your pillows. he looks gorgeous in the morning glow. 

your cat stretches before she jumps down off of your bed, pushing her way out of your room in search of her food. you bring your hand up to chishiya’s face, gently pushing strands of hair out of the way. it feels soft despite the continuous bleaching. 

he stirs a little when you start twisting his bangs into little braids. his thumb strokes against your skin underneath your shirt. you smile, pushing yourself upwards to press a kiss against his forehead. chishiya doesn’t open his eyes but his lips quirk upwards into a small smile. 

“breakfast?” you whisper.

“later,” he rasps, pulling you back down into his arms. “wanna stay with you.”