#ai 11

Here’s my photo collage artwork of Jessica Sanchez

Colton accepted his elimination, accepted it when his name fell from Ryan's lips. He looked over at Phil, who'd gotten halfway to standing up in shock and outrage, before being tugged back to reality by Elise. He watched his idol journey video play, and smiled at the funny bits. When he had to sing his swan song, he fell to his knees and prayed again, this time not for grace, but to thank Him for relief. So, Colton did what he did best: he praised. He tried not to pay attention to Phillip, who had his head buried into his hands, who looked utterly destroyed. He didn't want to think of saying goodbye to him, and to everyone else. Saying goodbye to Phillip was going to be the hardest thing, he thought, when he finished. Phillip was in his arms first, and Colton buried his head into the older man's shoulder and tried to breathe.

"You did so good," Phillip whispered, as Colton tried to commit his scent to memory.

"You deserve to be here. I don't know what America was thinking," he continued, quiet. Then he stepped away, and let the others talk to him and hug him. Then the judges, Schyler and his family, and then Elise.

Elise stared at him, long and hard, before giving him one of her famous bear hugs.

"You did so good last night. I don't know why America decided to be stupid this week," she whispered, and Colton couldn't resist the urge to smile into her neck.

"Thanks, Elise," he said, and she pulled away from him and gave him a serious look.

"Sit by me in the car. We need to talk," she said, and then she disappeared backstage where he knew everyone was waiting on him. He said a quick goodbye to his sister and his mother, and then headed back to where Elise was waiting on him to get the last car. Colton was surprised Elise was able to convince Phillip to go in a different car (they always sat next to each other), but he slid in and Elise slammed the door shut. Colton watched as the stage disappeared from view.

He turned back to her once he could no longer see the set. They had a good 45 minute drive back to the mansion.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" he asked, suddenly curious. Elise and him were close, but they'd rarely had very serious conversations, and by the look on  her face, this conversation was indeed very serious. She took a deep breath and tucked a strand of blonde hair behind her ear, giving Colton one of her soul-searching looks. It made his heart flutter nervously.

"You're in love with Phil," she said finally, her mouth a thin line. A surprised gasp pushed its way from Colton's throat, and denials immediately bubbled to his lips. She silenced him with a quick look.

"Shut up. Don't even think of denying it, sweetie. It's painfully obvious," she said, tilting her head. She fell silent for a long while, before a smile gently curled up her lips.

"It's also painfully obvious that he's in love with you, too." Colton's heart stopped, and then started again, epileptic rabbit quick. A blush rose to his cheeks, tinging his ears and the back of his neck pink.

"I don't-. I can't-" Colton was at a loss for words, and Elise placed a gentle hand on his leg.

"It's okay. Phil's a little scared too. And that's okay. Love's definitely scary. Scary as Hell, actually. But it's okay. It's okay to be scared out of your mind, because you're stronger if you conquer your fears," she said, smiling fully now. Colton ran a shaky hand through his hair, and he shook his head.

"It's too late, now," he said, groaning woefully. Elise smiled, reaching out to grab his shaking hand, and she squeezed it comfortingly.

"It's never too late, sweetie," she said, quiet.

--

Five minutes before the car arrived at the mansion, Colton really started to freak out.

"Are you sure?" he asked for the third time in the past two minutes. Elise groaned, and nodded.

"Yes, yes. I am definitely sure. He told me himself. Twice," she said, and Colton tucked his fingers into his belt loops, heart threatening to beat right out of his chest. He had never been so nervous before, and really, he'd never been so sad, either. He felt hollow inside, as if his insides have been ripped out. It was one thing to be sent home, but it was an entirely different ball field to tell someone you love them. He stared up at the California sky, the stars glittering above them, and prayed.

Oh, God. I love this man. Please, please give me guidance. I need it.

--

When Colton stepped out of the car, no one said anything. They just gave him soft glances and a wide berth.

"I guess I'm just gonna go and uh. Pack," Colton said, quietly, his throat tightening at the end of his sentence. He didn't want to leave all of these people. Especially not Phil. Phil, he thought. Phil.

"I can help, if you want," Phillip offered, expression pained, but gentle.

"Yeah, yeah. That'd be nice," Colton said, giving Elise a terrified look over his shoulder. The girl in turn gave him a thumbs up and a wide grin. Colton slowly headed up the stairs, heart thudding in his chest, Phillip's footsteps in time with his. Colton stepped into his room, and flipped on the light. He rummaged for his suitcase, and then sat with it on his bed. Phillip closed the door, and stood a few feet in front of him. Neither of them said a word as they let it sink in that yes, this was the last night Colton was going to be at the mansion. The elimination really had happened. Colton wrung his hands nervously, chewing on his lower lip. He looked up at Phil through his lashes, took a deep breath, and blurted, "I love you," before he could stop himself.

Phillip stood in shock for a few seconds, before his whole body started to shake with laughter. Colton stared, wide-eyed, and wondered if he'd done something wrong, but Phil got on his knees in front of him so that they were the same height again, and cupped the back of Colton's head with a gentle hand. Blue-green eyes stared right into Colton's brown, and Phillip chuckled, leaning closer. "I was hoping to ease into that conversation," Phil said softly, close enough that their faces almost touched, breaths mingling. Phillip's eyes softened, fingers curling into Colton's flushed skin.

"I love you, too, Colt," he said, slowly, and Colton leaned in to press his forehead against Phillip's, his heart still going a million miles a minute. His hands went from being at his sides to being on either side of Phil's face, thumb tracing over his cheek. Phil's other hand rested warm on his hip, heat searing through the cloth.

"I don't want to go," Colton murmured desperately, eyes closed in anguish. Phillip pressed closer, if possible, breath coming out in a shuddering sigh.

"And I don't want you to leave," he said, choking. And Colton did something instinctively; he leaned in and kissed him. His heart stopped for a moment, but restarted when Phil began to kiss him back. The hand that was curled against his hip fisted tighter into his skin and shirt, and Phil pushed him back onto the bed, pushing the suitcase out of the way. They laid across the bed, Phil's fingers finding their way underneath his shirt, leaving burning trails as his fingers explored the wide expanse of Colton's chest. His lips kissed, open-mouthed, down his neck, and to his collarbone. Colton groaned, fingers digging into the skin of his back, and Phil kissed the hollow of his throat, feeling the vibration hum through his lips. Colton dragged him back up, and kissed him thoroughly, eyes shut tight against the reality of the world, getting lost in the feeling of Phillip's lips on his own.

--

After a few more minutes of quiet snogging, Colton placed a hand on Phil's neck.  They laid side-by-side on the bed, facing one another. Colton's head replaced the hand, and he breathed in stuttering gasps, willing himself not to cry. Phillip's hand fisted tighter into his side, fingers curling almost hard enough to bruise.

"I love you," Colton mouthed against Phil's neck, and Phillip pulled him closer, nuzzling what he could of Colton's head.

"I love you, too," Phillip replied, eyes sliding closed, both of the wishing the moment wouldn't end.

But it had to. Colton was leaving first thing in the morning, and they still hadn't started packing. So, Colton reluctantly started opening drawers, shoving things into his suitcase. Phillip helped, and in the process stole two shirts and a hoodie of Colton's all of which he noticed and said that Phil could keep.

"To remember me by," he said quietly. None of them were particular favourites, so it was easy to let them go. Phillip disappeared for a few moments, before coming back with a hoodie in hand. It was Phil's favourite, his Mission Change hoodie. Phil slid it over Colton's head, and if it was a little big on Phil, then it engulfed Colton. Phillip smiled at him, and gave him a chaste kiss, warm and dry. They finally finished packing about 15 minutes later, and the two men headed downstairs, not touching, though both wishing they could. Elise was still downstairs, talking to Hollie and Skylar about God knows what, but they were all laughing.

"Hey, Elise," Colton started, and Elise raised a brow at him. He smiled broadly, ears turning pink with flush.

"Uh, you. You were right. About that thing," he said, and Elise grinned, and then stood up. She enveloped him in a hug, and then hugged Phil.

"See, I told you. You gotta learn to trust Momma Elise. She knows what she's talking about," she said, and Hollie and Skylar grinned slyly at them.

"Did you tell..?" Phillip asked, tilting his head towards the two girls, and Elise shrugged, but her smile gave her away. Both of the boys turned red, and Colton tucked his fingers nervously into his belt loops.

"No worries, not gonna tell anyone," Hollie reassured, smiling. Skylar reached out and grabbed Colton's arm, squeezing gently.

"Y'all are so cute, don't worry. We don't plan on tellin' anyone about this," she said, warm.

"Thanks, you guys," Colton said, and he gave both of them hugs. Then he yawned, and blinked tiredly at them.

"I'm gonna head to bed. Goodnight," he said, and the three girls replied, "Goodnight," in unison. Colton and Phillip headed back up the stairs, one of Phil's hands resting on Colton's lower back. When they made it back to Colton's room, Colton stepped inside, but Phil stayed on the threshold. Colton turned when he didn't feel the warm pressure of his hand, and he tilted his head.

"You get in your pajamas, I'm going to get out of these clothes," he said, smiling, and he turned away and went back to his room. Colton threw his shirt off and looked around for his sweats, and found them tucked near the very bottom of his suitcase. He turned on the nightstand's lamp and flipped off the main light and began to read his Bible before Phil got back. When he heard the door quietly click shut and the lock slide into place, he looked up to see Phil in a t-shirt and shorts. Colton slowly put the worn leatherback book on top of the suitcase on the floor, and watched as Phillip approached the bed quietly, with a smile. He crawled onto the bed, and ended up straddling Colton's hips. He curled his fingers into the milky skin right above the low-slung line of his sweatpants, and Colton stared up at him with wide brown eyes. Phillip leaned down and Colton leaned up and they were kissing again. Phil's hands traveled up so they were resting on his ribcage. They stayed like that for a few minutes, before Colton gently pushed Phil back, and Phil stopped, looking down at him. Colton shifted his hips, and Phil rolled off and laid on his side. He propped his head up and looked at Colton, memorizing the contours of his face. He reached out and traced one of Colton's high cheekbones, fingers feather-light. Colton leaned into the touch, and he reached out a hand behind him to turn off the lamp. They were enveloped in darkness, and it took a few minutes for their eyes to adjust. Phil enfolded Colton in his arms, their legs tangled together.

And if Phillip couldn't stop crying for over two hours before he fell asleep, well, neither of them said anything.

And if Colton sobbed into Phillip's chest, well, he was the only one awake to hear it.

--

Colton woke up exhausted, and he slammed a hand down on the blaring alarm clock. Phillip blinked blearily at him, and then over his shoulder at the clock. 6am. They had an hour together. Colton nuzzled into Phil's chest, and he took a deep breath. He smelled like citrus, and warm summer air. He was going to miss that smell, and badly. He was going to miss him.

Colton sighed, breathed in deeply one last time, and sat up, stretching.

"Gotta take a shower. Won't be long," Colton whispered, as if he'd wake the whole house, but he was sure that most of the girls had been awake for a while, now. Phil groaned, and curled back up under the blankets, and Colton smiled as he started the hot water. Almost everyone in the house sang in the shower, and if they didn't, they sang while they did mundane tasks, like cleaned, or got makeup done, or whatever else. Colton sang quietly, hoping not to wake Phillip as he stepped under the hot spray. He shampooed his hair, rinsed, repeated, and conditioned it, and scrubbed at his body until his skin was raw and all he could smell was pineapples. He dried off his hair as much as he could without blow drying, and wrapped the towel around his waist. He stepped out of the bathroom, steaming air floating into his room. Phillip looked over approvingly, grinning. Colton laughed, and grabbed his clothes, disappearing back into the bathroom to get dressed.

When he stepped out again, Phil was sitting up, throwing his arms above his head and stretching. He yawned, and his face fell serious, his hand reaching out to grab Colton's wrist. Colton stepped forward, and Phillip kissed him, gently.

"I love you," he said, pulling away. "More than I've ever loved anyone. Like, ever." Colton blushed, and his fingers curled into the hair at the nape of Phil's neck.

"I love you, too, Phil. A lot," he said, and Phillip breathed in heavily, like he was trying hard to hold in his tears. And he probably was. There was a knock at the door, and they both jumped.

"Boys?" came a familiar voice. Elise. They both sighed in relief.

"Yeah?" Colton called, voice just steady enough.

"Breakfast downstairs," she said, and Colton pulled Phillip up to his feet and they went to the door, opening it. Elise was standing there in a t-shirt and shorts, fingers curling through her hair.

"Good. I'm hungry," Phil said, yawning again, and he brushed past Colton, placing a hand on his back before leaving, and he headed down the stairs. Elise watched him leave, and then turned her attention back to Colton.

"Are you okay?" she asked, and he shrugged.

"I'll be okay. Probably," he said, slowly. Elise frowned, and wrapped a hand around his bicep. "It's only a few weeks," he reassured her.

"I'll be okay." Elise gave him another worried look before stepping out of the doorframe and letting him by. Colton headed down the stairs, and when he got to the kitchen, everyone was suddenly fascinated by their food except for Phil, who gestured him over to his side, where he had a bowl of cereal waiting for him. Everyone else was eating egg and toast, but Phillip didn't like eggs, and neither did Colton. He'd never understood what was so great about eating baby chickens. They ate side-by-side in relative silence, and Phil took his bowl from him when he finished eating. Colton headed back upstairs to brush his teeth and grab his suitcases to bring them downstairs.

When he got downstairs, the car was waiting on him. His heart thudded painfully in his chest when Phillip was nowhere to be found, and he said his goodbyes to everyone. He put his stuff into the car with help from Josh, and he slid into the car. Phillip ran out of the house, and to the car, forgotten hoodie in hand.

"You forgot this," he said, handing it off to him. He stuck his head into the window, just far enough to sneak a kiss.

"Love you, man," he said, because people were around, but he heard the meaning in those words.

"Love you, too," Colton replied, and the car started up. He waved again, smiling, and then buried his face into the hoodie that still smelled warm, like Phillip's skin.

I just had a very long and fun night with my friends last night. and when I woke up at 11am.... Text Message: PHILIP PHILIPS WON AI 11 :(((

ME: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!??!?!?!!

okay so that was half expected since there are millions of teenage girls crazy over her. but wait till you see how Jessica Sanchez's career will prosper after a year :D

I also like Philip but not AI. cause AI is just a popularity contest. and besides, where are the previous winners of AI right now? after jordin sparks won.

And ADAM LAMBERT? his name is very alive in the industry :)

OKAYYYYY SO WITH KING 2 HEARTS.... :(((((

Earnest bot died. 

my EUN SHI KYUNG DIED. THAT BONGU PIG < loved the foundation and the portrayal of his character though> KILLED HIM. SHOCKS. OH MY GOD. SERIOUSLY? NO HAPPY ENDING FOR MY PRINCESS?!??!?!!!!! :(( and EUN SHI KYUNG does not deserve to die! BOOYAH! he just barely kissed his love of his life whom he just met after living his whole life as an earnest soldier bot. 

does this mean no more BABY EUN SHI KYUNGS in the future?? 

NO WAY.

and while i was reading the recap, i was like...

Dear K2H PD NIM, i'll run out of words before i can totally express how awesome your drama is, but please DON'T LET EUN SHI KYUNG DIE TILL THE LAST EPISODE TONIGHT. you'll reincarnate him right? right? RIGHT? or that was a fake death right? RIGHT? ?!?!??!?!?!!. 

EUN SHI KYUNG= DEAD? no. no. no. something should've happened behind. I know he'll be alive again because of the last filming pics 

and because....

but still i cried so much while reading the spoiler recap to the point that i gave up reading the whole thing because i was too busy crying for eun shi kyung. I can't understand that NK vs. SK war part. anyways.  crossed fingers..