#ahscult

American Horror Story - Cult [7x9}

'cause i'm your jazz singer and you're my cult leader i love you forever. 🛐

Description- you have a flower crown and put it on kai, it gets stuck on him and he tries to hide it for the rest of the day

Word Count- 789

Warnings-cursing, kai anderson, cult mention nothing much just somewhat fluff

A/n- this is just a joke except made literate but this was really fun to write, as usual all grammatical errors are mostly intentional

(finally posted it!! @kaismessiahbb @cryptic-zeros )

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You were wearing a bright pink artificial flower crown when you walked in on Kai getting ready to leave for a meet up with the cult

It stood out apart from you mainly because of the blinding neon pink it was

“Hey” he said looking into the closet for what he was going to wear

He turned around and looked almost scared of what was on your head

“What the fuck is on your head?”

“Its a flower crown?”

“Oh yeah those things” he immediately went back to getting ready for the meeting

When he turned back around, you creeped up behind him and put it on him

“Shit- what the hell (y/n)” he jumped

“Oh my god”

“What?”

“You look adorable with that on”

“God i don have time for this” he reaches to take it off

“No! stop don’t take it off”

You run up to him and push it back onto him right when he’s about to pull it off

“Fuck whatever, im gonna go take a nap i’ll be leaving in an hour, back in four”

He walks out simultaneously kissing you on the forehead

“K”

*about an hour later*

Kai wakes up and goes to the bathroom to brush his teeth and get ready to leave when he realizes he’s immensely fucked up

The greasy mess he has for hair, got completely stuck inbetween the flower crown and no matter how hard he tried it wasn’t going to budge

‘Holy shit what am i gonna do’

He pulls the hood up on his long leather coat and grabs his mask

Kai starts walking towards the door, hood still up but you think nothing of it

Once he meets up with his followers he still doesn’t take off his hood

“So, I assume you all know why we’re here today?”

“To kill someone?” Harrison yells out and lets out a small laugh

“Yeah no shit, don’t fucking scream out loud are you stupid”

“Everyone put on your masks”

Kai struggles to put on his mask, as he keeps his hood on concealing the flower crown

“Uh-um divine ruler?” Harrison stutters

“Yeah?” Kai says still struggling to put the mask around his head

“I know we’re supposed to be the ones following your orders but... I think you need to take off your hood for that to work”

“I know-fuck hold on “ he pushes it further down but nothing works

He continues to struggle and eventually resorts to removing his hood

Everyone looks around questioning what happened

“Hey do you need help with uh… that” R.J says quietly

“No don’t fucking touch my head”

“Ok y-yeah, sure ”

He puts on his clown mask and finally they can go through with the task of the evening

“Alright, let’s head in”

*time skip* 2 hours

It was now 10:30pm and you heard forceful steps coming from upstairs while you were in the basement, which meant that it was Kai

“Y/N I’m back!” he called out

“I know” you said nonchalantly

A couple of minutes passed and you heard weird noises coming from the bathroom

You went to the bathroom and walked in on Kai aggressively brushing his hair and yanking at it

“Kai what the hell are you doing?”

“I took a nap after you put the flower hat thing on my head i woke up it was all stuck”

You couldn’t help but let out a small laugh but instantly went to try and help him

“Oh god how the fuck does this even happen” you say quietly to him, while trying to separate the flower crown from his hair

“I don’t know- just get it out!”

“Okay i’m trying hold on, we might have to just cut it off”

“The flower crown? okay sure”

“No your hair”

“What no i cant do that!”

“Well, i guess i could try detangling under water?”

“Okay try that”

You got some hot water from the sink and soaked his hair in it

You put conditioner ( something that was definitely foreign to his head) to soften it up then started combing out the mess he’d created

After a good 30 minutes you were finally able to get rid of all the knots in his head as well as the flower crown

Kai went to go take a shower so you left to go get ready for the night

He got out and sat next to you on the couch in the basement to watch the news

You scooted over to him mainly because of your urge to touch his hair

Surprisingly, it felt incredibly soft

“You should wash your hair more often, it feels nice”

“I always wash my hair, actually everyday”

“With what?”

“Water”

‘ Slashing tyres? You should be pulling out a knife and slashing their fucking throats ‘

What I imagine it would be like to be in a relationship with Ally Mayfair-Richards:

-I feel like you and Ally would meet after the cult and all the crazy things she had been through. You probably heard of her from the news and the stories people have told about her and her family and you may or may not have had a massive crush for a while seeing her on tv sometimes especially in that red suit

-The first time you meet has got to be at her restaurant or you moving into the neighbourhood. Even though Ally has been through a lot and she has trust issues, she is one of those sweet kind of neighbours, never not helping out if anything is needed. When you went over to her house one day to ask for some flour, after you had already met she was so desperate and stressed so you asked her if she‘s okay and she confessed her babysitter cancelled last minute so of course you offered to do it

-At that point you would already know each other quite well and Ally will make sure to thank you properly. From then on things just took it‘s turn and she would totally ask you out on a date in her restaurant. At first the senator will have problems opening up and trusting again but she‘s got a good feeling with you especially the way you treat Oz and how he never shuts up about you. You would take things very slow but Ally being so sweet and adorable and hot all the time it‘s hard not to fall in love with her

-Eventually after a while Ally would be the one to make the final move and ask you to be her girlfriend. However not without telling you the whole truth about her past. She was very open about Kai and the cult and her ex-wife and she made some hints here and there but she never said the whole truth out loud to you. It‘s her way of giving you trust by telling you the whole story. Ally would be very anxious, scared that you wouldn‘t want her under these circumstances or maybe even you being scared of her but when you told her you would have done the same thing and she never deserved any of this and simply pulled her into your arms the story was complete

-Ally will love you unconditionally and be eternally grateful for your love and how pure you are. She likes the fact you are a bit younger and she doesn‘t mind the age gap. Whenever someone will point it out or make a remark about it, she will quickly shut them up with a sarcastic reply or give them her death glare. Ally loves how you adapted into their little family and how great you are with Oz, always picking him up from school or taking him on days out to the park or mall when she is working long

-Her being the owner of a restaurant and super busy with her political career, she will often be working super late or go on buisness trips to Washington or somewhere across the state. If she can, she will ask you to join her and Oz sleeping over at a friend but if you have work and can‘t, she will miss you like crazy and constantly message you or call you, just to hear your sweet voice and so she can at least pretend to be close to you

-She has a big soft spot for you, her eyes always expressing her love through that little sparkle or the smile tugged on her lips whenever she sees you. You remember the exact moment she confessed her love without using words, when you joined her at a big political rally and you sat in the first row, smiling and being super proud and she smiled so sincerly at you when she finished her speech and her eyes practically confessed her love to you

-Ally will always make sure you are okay, no matter how busy her day would have been or how stressed she is. If she senses something off she will approach you about it. The brunette quickly figures out when something is wrong by the way you message her slightly different or your eyes not sparkling as bright as usually or your smile just seeming off that day. She knows you don‘t like sharing your feelings but she will always approach and encourage you and she will be there through every bad day or even your insecurities besides Ally still having some herself after her past experiences

-Petnames: She just can‘t help it and will often call you sweet names because she loves how your face lights up and sometimes you are a blushing mess depending on what she said. „Sweetheart, sweetie and angel“ are her usual petnames for you but sometimes she thinks of something even cuter and won‘t hesitate to use it no matter where and when

-Routines: Ally likes sticking to routines like for instance whenever you have a day or the evening off you will pick up Oz, prepare dinner and a bath for when Ally would return. If she is home early however, she will be doing the same in return. She loves spoiling you sometimes like preparing a little spa evening for you, cooking your favorite meal and pouring some of yours and her favorite wine or giving you massages that totally always lead to sex

-Little things you love about her: you love how incredibly strong she is after everything she has been through. Also how amazing she is with Oz and a great role model. You admire her so much and you are so deeply in love with the cute things she does everyday for example how sleepy she is in the morning, the way her face scrunches up when you say something adorable or silly and how she would happily beat up or kill anyone that might look at you or Oz the wrong way. She‘s a badass to be honest