#agent-carson-squared

This message has been a long time coming, and it breaks my heart, and I'll probably cry while I'm typing this, but I think this blog is going to go on an indefinite hiatus... an official one. 

For ages I've tried to make this work, and I really wanted to, it was in my heart and all of you are always on my mind and in my thoughts but this is me finally admitting that I can't properly handle this and the responsibilities that go along with it. 

I'm sorry. 

You have all taught me so much and I love all of you guys, you're like my tumblr family, I've never made closer friends online than you guys. I'm so sorry you guys but unfortunately my life has reached a point where I'm fully able to admit that I don't have the time to adequately keep this blog active. 

I'll miss you, all of you more than you'll ever know. This being said please talk to me! I'm still at my personal blog, www.lecterphiled.tumblr.com and I wanna hear from all of you please <3 message me and ask for my facebook I wanna talk to you, I wanna catch up, and I want to stay in contact because you were all a very important part of my life.

But most of all, I think I'll miss Bruce. (this next part might get a little personal and maybe triggery so I'm putting it under a cut and I'll have * * marking off the parts that might hurt) 

Kristen timidly entered Penny's hospital room, surprised that Paul wasn't there, wielding a big book that looked as if it's been dragged through mud. She touched Penny's hand as she sat down, letting go to crack the book open, flipping the pages to the one that reminded her most of her childhood. Her father used to tell this story to her mother as she lay on her deathbed, and it had always meant a lot to Kristen.

"Once upon a time, there was a princess whose skin was white as snow and her lips as red as blood. This woman's name was Snow White. She was so beautiful, that she had been known to be the fairest maiden of all, but that angered the evil queen. This queen was Snow White's stepmother, and she was jealous of Snow's beauty. She sent a hunter to take Snow White out into the woods and kill her, bringing her heart to the queen. The hunter grew cowardly and left the beautiful girl in the woods all alone and afraid. Fortunately, a group of seven kind dwarves found her that morning and allowed her to take residence in their house. Everything was well until the queen found out that Snow White had lived, deciding to kill her herself. She guised herself as an old hag, delving into the woods and offering Snow White an apple. Snow, being a kind soul, happily accepted the old woman's gift and took a bite, unknowing that it was poison. With a single bite, she fell to the ground, lifeless. Later that evening, the dwarves found her and were devastated, covering her in roses and placing her in a coffin made of crystals. Every day for fifteen days they visited her coffin, laying a new rose each day, but on the sixteenth day, they discovered a handsome man admiring Snow White's beauty. To their shock he opened the coffin and kissed her lightly on her lips, which was followed by her eyelids opening and Snow White being revived. The prince asked Snow White to marry him, and she happily agreed. The dwarves and Snow White said their goodbyes, and the couple went back to the tower and were married. And they all lived happily ever after."

Kristen smiled at the storybook, looking up at Penny who remained still. She closed the book and scooted her chair closer to the bed. "You know, you're a lot like Snow White. You're strong, brave, and going through a hard time. But the difference is that you don't need a prince to come and save you. My father always read this story to my mother, when she was dying. You'd like my mother, she protected me just like you did. She was fair to all and she always gave everyone a chance." By now Kristen was hysterical, not even bothering with wiping away the tears. "I'm not sure if you can hear me, but you will get through this, I swear. Even if I have to pull you into consciousness myself, you will get through it all."

James stumbled along the sidewalk. He wasn't sure how he'd been able to get back, he wasn't sure what he looked like, but he felt different. Not necessarily a bad different, no. But not as he had been before... before... before what, exactly?

Kristen stood at the front of Erin's school, tapping her foot and looking around cautiously, waiting for her little sister to emerge. Penny, James, nor anyone else in the Tower knew she was gone, so she had to try and make it back before they found out.

Come on, Erin. Hurry.

The nervous girl looked up at the Tower, back to the left, and then to the right. But she jumped when a man was standing in front of her, smiling an evil, crooked smile. Then there was the gun, pointed at her stomach. Kristen's eyes went wide only for a second, before she looked up at the man. Stay calm, you knew this was going to happen. Shush. She told herself over and over again as her killer lead her into the building where she was in her vision. Three SHIELD agents lay limp around the entrances, dead. Nonononono, that can't be. Please tell me that they didn't die trying to protect me. The now extremely scared girl thought, before she was thrown into the building, falling over, and looking at the man as he shut the door. She'd never seen him before, why would he want her dead?

"You know, kid, you made one guy hella angry." He said, cocking the gun to face her, before ordering her to stand up.

"Who would I have infuriated to such a degree that they would want me dead?" She asked, before stopping, her eyes going wide. All the death threats, he was serious. 

"He said that he wanted your death to be slow, painful." The older man said, pointing the gun at her torso.

Once.

Twice.

Three times.

Then the pain exploded, spreading throughout her body and there was blood. Kristen became overwhelmed, falling to her knees. No, stop that. You're satisfying him. Get up. And she tried to do just that, when the floor came up, closer and closer, and connected with the rest of her. Her killer walked over, laughing at her now bloodied face, and picking her up. Kristen couldn't fight, she just scrambled to stop the bleeding. She still wanted to live, so Penny, Lexi, James, even Clint, so they wouldn't blame themselves. But he still kicked the door open, and he stopped when the two were met with police cars, sirens, and shouting.

All the good stuff.

"Stop! One inch closer and I'll kill her!" He yelled, pointing the gun at her once more.

"More than you already have?" She retorted, looking up. Erin was in the crowd, crying. Good reliable Erin.

"Shut up!"

An officer's voice boomed, everything else going very quiet, "Drop the gun, and step forward with your hands up!" He ordered, and Kristen rolled her eyes. As if he would just go that quietly. The gun stayed pointed at her face, staring her down.

And one more shot was fired. Kristen closed her eyes, waiting for it all to go black, but it never did. Instead, her attempted murderer fell, the gun slamming to the floor. Paramedics and doctors scrambled to her, picking her up and carrying her to a stretcher.

That was all she remembered before everything went dark, for so many hours. And then the sound of her heart monitor woke Kristen up. There wasn't anyone in the room, the familiar medical supplies filling her nostrils. She laughed, she laughed for a few minutes, and stared up at the ceiling.