Are we middle age?
April 9, 1991
Catrina and I have our own secret Atwater connection. I told her about Steve T.. I studied her â88â â73 reunion book. My God we looked old and puffy by and large and separated and broken. But, still here, too. Age does that. It breaks you apart as it pulls you together. Tonight, for the first time, I queried âAre we middle age? By stating we arenât middle age, we said âyes we are!â 35 is the half way point or soâprobably 35-40 anyway. Canât get more middle aged than that. But, I donât care, I still feel young. Middle age is 45 or 55.
end of entry
Notes 1/22/2026
Catrina and I went to high school together in Atwater, California and graduated in 1973. On April 9, 1991, we were 35 years old. Steve T , who had been a close friend of mine until mid high school, was a gay man who died of AIDS in 1991. The class had its 15 year class reunion in 1988. The class put out a memory book after the reunion which I studied for the above entry. Catrina and I are now 70. As 70 approached , she said, "70 seems so old." I still feel young! 35 no longer seems like middle age. From the perspective of 70, it is the beginning of life. Catrina attended our 50 year High School class reunion held at the high school. . She said there was a list on the wall of deceased class mate. She said "There were a lot of names on that list" (I think we had 321 in our class). But, we are still here. We still have agency as we move closer to being enfolded in the mystery.
