#acklels

You wake up in the middle of a dirty parking lot. You’re confused, of course, but you’re also starving. Looking around, you realize that you are in the parking lot of a motel. Weird. The door to room number twelve is open, so you waltz in. The carpet reminds you of a bowling alley, and is so worn-down that it hardly masks the concrete it is supposed to cushion. The wallpaper, floral, is peeling at the seams. There are two queen-sized beds pushed against a wall and opposite there is an old box TV turned onto some “after hours” channel. You can see two women wearing Santa hats spraying whipped cream all over each other’s naked bodies. Huh. So it’s Christmastime. Also weird. It was like, September last time you checked. You hear a faint moaning and turn a little bit to your left. What the – is that Castiel?! You move closer and look again. Holy shit, it is Castiel! Or… it’s Misha Collins cosplaying. Either way, this is definitely the weirdest thing that has ever happened to you. After the initial shock has worn off, you realize that he’s unconscious. Well, at least he’s breathing. Your “CPR skills” are “rusty.” How have you seen people wake unconscious people in movies? Well, sometimes they slap the person. But you can’t bring yourself to slap this man. He’s too precious. Maybe you can splash cold water on him. That usually works in movies – and movies totally teach skills you can use in real life. You sweep your gaze around the room again and notice a bathroom. That’s nothing out of the ordinary. I mean, what motel room wouldn’t have a bathroom? You walk into the bathroom. There’s a low-quality plastic cup sitting on the edge of the porcelain sink. It’s clear. You grab the cup and fill it with water from the tap. During the short walk back to where Castiel/Misha is laying, you mentally prepare yourself to throw cold water on the face of one of your idols. It isn’t easy. You muster up the courage to toss the water out of the cup and onto his face. His eyes flutter open, and he squints at you.

“Where did you come from?” he asks.

“I don’t know…” you respond. “I just woke up in the parking lot.”

His squinting intensifies. “Odd.” he says.

“Excuse me?”

“That is the manner in which I also arrived here. It just happened.”

“Oh…kay…” you respond slowly. Your stomach growls. Oh yeah, you almost forgot. You’re fucking starving.

“You are hungry.” Cas/Misha observes. You nod.

“Follow me.”

Whoa – what the?! When did he stand up?! Okay… it’s definitely Castiel. Misha, no matter how hard he tried, could never move that quickly. So if this is Cas, does that mean you’re dreaming? Who knows? Maybe it’s real. You scoff at the idea. Yeah, this is a dream. Castiel clears his throat. Right, you’re supposed to be following him. You keep close to him and step outside. He stands still suddenly and takes a deep breath. You watch him, confused.

“Um, what are you doing?” You ask. He puts a finger to your lips and closes his eyes.

“This way.” Castiel is moving again. His stride is quicker than you would have suspected; suggesting he’s getting a little bit of help from his wings. You walk around the side of the motel and into another parking lot, when suddenly you see it. The car of your dreams – a black Chevy Impala, model year 1967. But then it gets so much better. Sitting on the trunk of the car, it’s them! Sam and Dean motherfucking Winchester, in the flesh! They spot you and jump off the car. The two brothers sprint across the parking lot to meet you in the middle.

“Cas! You’re awake!” Dean yells.

“Yes. It would appear so.” Castiel replies.

Sam looks at you defensively. “Who are you?” he asks, voice dripping with suspicion.

“My name’s Maddie,” you say breathlessly. “I’m… I’m a huge fan of your work!” The three men stare at you.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Dean asks. Shit, they don’t know that they’re a TV show. Shit, shit, shit! How do you explain this?!

“Uh… I… I just…”

“It’s not important right now,” Dean decides. “We need to focus on figuring out where the hell we are and how to get out of here.” He looks directly into your eyes. You almost faint staring into those beautiful pools… but snap back to attention. You have more self-control than that. “How did you end up here, Maddie?” He asks.

“I don’t know.” You answer. “I woke up on the other end of the parking lot and found Cas in one of the rooms.”

“How do you know my name?” Castiel asks, not missing a beat. FUCK. You really need to stop letting slip information.

“I… I heard Dea-I mean, this guy here shouting it when we found them.”

The men nod, although you can tell they’re still suspicious of you.

“Well, the car’s working, so let’s get out of here.” Sam decides. “I’m Sam, by the way,” he introduces himself to you and then points at Dean. “and this is my brother Dean.” You nod. You want to say “I know” but that would blow your cover to shreds. Sam and Dean get set in their respective places in the Impala and you and Cas sit in the back. The leather seats are pretty comfortable, although the car smells like cheeseburgers and whiskey. You start to gaze out the window and – hold on, was that a cow flying through the air?! You look outside more alertly. Things that have no business being airborne are floating around. A pair of knitting needles is clicking away at a scarf composed of earthworms instead of yarn, an entire theatre cast of Shakespeare’s Hamlet is performing as they twirl through the air, and frogs are jumping higher and higher into the sky with each bound as they hit the ground. You turn to ask what the hell is going on, but you’re suddenly not in the Impala anymore. You’re standing in the middle of a meadow. Team Freewill is still here, but something is very, very different. All of their heads have been replaced with those of horses! Dean has pure black hair covering his head, Sam has a long golden mane, and Castiel is a palomino. They’re all neighing at each other, but then Dean and Cas embrace each other and Sam raises his arms into the air in the “V for victory” symbol.

You’re just starting to get a hold of reality when the scene changes again. Wait, you’ve read about this! REM sleep; or rapid-eye-movement sleep is when most of your dreaming occurs. Maybe all this rapid eye movement has something to do with this. Damn, and that original dream was going to have a really cool plot, too! In this new setting, all the boys have their proper heads on. They look pretty normal. Sam is standing by with a camera, and Dean is… what the – Dean is getting down on one knee! He pulls a tiny square box from his coat pocket and opens the lid. There’s a simple gold band inside.

“Castiel, will you marry me?” He asks. Cas throws his hands up to his face and covers his mouth in surprise. He nods.

“Yes!” He shouts. “Yes, I will marry you, Dean Winchester!”

Dean stands and Cas throws his arms around his fiancé's neck. They hug tight and Sam snaps pictures from every angle. Oh. My. God. You’ve just witnessed your OTP of all OTPs in a cliché marriage proposal! What will the next dream bring, you wonder? Their wedding? Ugh, if only you could figure out how to control these things!

You sit up in your bed. Huh, so the next cycle is taking place in your room. That’s a bit strange. You look around for Sam, Dean, and Cas but there is no one to be found. You spring out of bed and peek out the door into the hallway. Not a soul in sight. You turn back around and notice something on your bed that definitely wasn’t there before. There’s a note written on a piece of loose leaf paper ripped from a nearby journal.

Did you enjoy that?

We should play again sometime.