there’s so many more rich people than i ever imagined

sometimes a house can cost 12 million dollars and be the ugliest smallest piece of shit you can imagine

people pay $23,000 for parking spots in some places.

rich people love having places to sit. have a hallway? put a single chair at the end. couches? own at least 3. bathroom? sure put a velvet chair next to the tub. you’re rich! sit wherever you want

rich people cannot fucking decorate for the life of them

rich people think Empty Space is a decoration

white, grey, and beige are the only colours rich people can see

unless you’re Mega Fuckoff Rich then we start to see a few bold teals and very sanguine reds and buttercream yellows—but that’s IT!!!!

these bitches LOVE mirrors. the bigger and weirder shaped the better.

rich people love to put rugs on top of rugs. carpeting is for the poor.

rich people hate to have walls. pillars are ok though. sometimes they don’t even like having floors and forget to install half the second story and leave a fun little cliff that overlooks usually (one of) the living room(s) for some reason.

if you have money, you own a pool with a funky patterned liner. if you have big money, you have a weird minimalist concrete hole in an odd shape filled with water. if you have really big money you own a small tropical swamp that you can swim in. and if you’re really, honestly, tits-deep in cash, you have one of the last 2 while being on a waterfront property.

if you don’t have a 4 poster bed, chandelier, pool table, bar (indoor), bar (outdoor), and a house turret, you aren’t actually rich

one million windows. 85% window. no curtains for regular rich, fancy pointless curtains for big rich.

bathtubs in front of huge unfrosted, un-curtained windows is surprisingly popular. guess money brings body confidence and/or the ability to pay off indecency charges. 

if you’re extra rich, even the street name will reflect that

rich people love to have a HUGE lawn with Absolutely Fucking Nothing on it, except it’s mowed in a weird pattern

seriously, why do rich people own so many fucking chairs. you don’t need matching velvet wingback chairs in the foyer 2 metres from the front door.

horse paintings, horse statues, actual horses, horse shoes. horses = money. a horse is just a very expensive dog that will never love you*

you will never have enough lighting to satisfy the rich. it must always be daytime in this house.

wall decorations that are a single letter placed in a weird spot. i love walking into a room and it’s completely undecorated but for a single T and a U on opposite walls.

if you own visible knickknacks you’re probably poor

only one front door?? chump. double doors only.

there’s a fine line between exposed brick and wooden beams being shabby and poor, and chic and trendy. the line is usually made of dust and cobwebs

if you’re new-money-rich it’s apparently illegal not to have a purple themed room for no reason

if there is a single other house within viewing distance that costs under a million, you’re not as rich as you could be

the store doesn’t open until 10am. i get there at 9:30 and there’s a lady already standing there so i made small talk as i was waiting for them to unlock and let me in, and she goes “oh yeah, i got here early bc the other day i had to stand in line for 10 minutes and i don’t want to wait in line again.”

horrible little mittens to turn you into the swamp thing or a lego man!

what if thumb screws but every finger?

worlds most unsexy fishnets/halloween witch fingers

these ones feel like a fetish only clowns would have