Happened to chance by a friend's blog, another failed relationship. its been a long time since i really took time to look at people around me.

And on her, i saw something familiar. myself when i was broken.

Yes, it may just be another "he is just a passer-by" story. but when it really happens to you, how can you feel nothing. the fact is no one can, not even superman. so why be so hard on ourselves, we are born to feel, so if anyone feels that this emo stuffs are totally unnecessary, you can skip this post.No offense. 

Even when i let my mind run on rewind now, i can still feel something. it is a feeling that can't be described. and when you see someone in a mess like you were in before, you feel for them. the only reason being you know exactly how much it hurts. Till now, i fear, i feel insecure when the situation or even the venue relates back to the past. Like bad memories always do, never erased, just kept in a folder that is left untouched. the slightest thought of it will drown you.

I think i heard it somewhere, that you learn exceptionally fast when it is of great impact. i guess a failed relationship tells it all. your mind absorbed every single detail, every feeling. and it is when you see or experience the similar situations, you will be surprised at how your mind operate differently, you start to speak like you are somebody else. better than you were before. And this is when people will start to notice the change in you.

So amazing.

Its a learning journey that everyone goes through. At least this was what i was told. so no matter what happens, i always keep this in mind, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Happiness is just not something that can be found or discovered.

To me, it only happens when someone or something brings it to you. In daily life, when you feel happy, that is contentment, with all that happened.

Happiness is different. Its a feeling beyond contentment. I like to call it a bonus.

Thank you bf, you brought the best gift to me, something I've always wanted but never had. Happiness.

With love,

This morning started well.

The reason for that? A friendly bus driver.

Sometimes it doesn't take something expensive or exquisite to brighten my day. Maybe I'm easily contented. Like what my boy always say, my mood swings are very extreme. Which means i get very happy easily and get very sad easily too. well. there are always two sides. haha.

For a while, i though my life was not mine. Just because i don't enjoy working and blah blah. but as i snooze on my bed this morning. some thoughts struck me. Life might be tough, but its always better to feel something about life. if one day i suddenly can't find anything to describe my life, I'll be such a failure cos i would be wasting it away. I tried to imagine myself doing nothing everyday. watching shows till I drop. If anyone asks me how my life is, i won't be able to describe it. yup. that's a perfect example. :D

Now my life is tough because i think 24hrs is insufficient for me. and that's a good thing, i'm not wasting any second doing nothing. :)

I'm so glad and is feeling so enlightened. haha! *holy ring*

My dear boy is back!

Like F-I-N-A-L-L-Y.

made a card for his homecoming. :) super proud of myself.

I have to admit I wasn't all strong when he was away.

I cry, I curse and swear, and I go crazy some times.

But i'm glad that I have some really dear friends arnd me.

Although I might not say it out loud. I am really touched.

Through bad times, I realised who my true friends are.

:)

i'm really happy now. like from the bottom of my heart. feeling the happiness.

Thanks!

and i love you all.