About rejection letter. Negative rant warning.
So I submitted my application for that Dragon Age Zine project a while back, and just saw their rejection email this morning. I wish I could use this to fire up my motivation to get better at drawing, but I just don’t have the emotional strength to do that right now. It was a generic rejection letter, and I am not blaming them when I say that I wish the message had included the reasons (skill level, style, my OC or the Tarot card choice etc.) so I knew which area to focus on. (Kind of like job application...though they generally only tell you “There were better candidates” or something similar.)
Again, I’m not faulting them, they are super super busy and I appreciate what they are doing and for what purpose (they are donating all profits to what I consider a very good and timely cause). And also, if you are reading this and have made the cut, congrats!!! I know the kind of love and creativity my artist/writer mutuals and followers put in their OC’s so I’m excited for them to appear on a big project like this <3
The problem is with me and my inability to process rejection very well, and without specific reasons given and in my current state, I can’t keep myself from taking it as a blanket rejection of everything about my art...another confirmation that my art just doesn’t cut it, it just isn’t good enough, it doesn’t a single element that is unique or stands out. I really wish I could make myself feel “Damn it, I WILL get better” until I no longer feel this way even if my art gets rejected again and again. I think writers trying to get published must go through this every time they submit their story and do not get published. I guess the difference between artists/writers who get recognition or don’t depend on whether or not we keep going despite rejections and the inevitable self-doubt that comes from them.
I wish I could take myself far less seriously so I can take rejections much better. I wish I had the courage to just put myself out there to be rejected over and over and not hurt so much each time. I wish I could funnel my energy into working harder instead of sulking and beating myself up.
Anyway, tl;dr....I knew my art sucked but it still hurts to be told so. lol
