#about chase

hajkhdas yall are insufferable damn (ily 2 inco)

-my art has improved drastically over the last year and I’m super happy about it!

-i can cook two (2) whole meals

-i like my eye color. they were supposed to turn brown but they stayed hazel :’)

-i have secret vampire teeth. (no, i really do. i think it’s super cool. they’re called peg laterals. i have veneers on now though)

I feel it running through my veins Guess I'm already bleeding for it All four chambers got a different kinda beat for it Try to hold my breath but it's filling up my lungs Try keep it quiet but it's banging like a drum And they're shaking up my bones And tearing up my ligaments I'm still tryna act like, nah it ain't that serious

In an interview with the New York Times, Chase had once spoke about his ALS as something that only moved his life forward. He had sat in the interview with his usual energy, making the room laugh, a trait that was made clear on paper when the article was published. He had told the reporter that all he wanted was to be able to look back on life in his final moments and know that he had done everything he could to live his life to the fullest. That he had loved enough, done enough, seen enough to feel like his life was not ended early in vain. 

And that was how he set out to face his life. Three kids, a wife that made his entire world rotate, a career that he could be proud of and tons of friends and family who were with him every step of the way. As his condition worsened he started to make more plans. He spent more time with his friends, had longer conversations with Odessa on what they were going to do, how they were going to ease the kids into accepting the fact that they would lose their father earlier than most. He spent their childhoods doing everything they wanted. Every game, science fair, photography showcase, fashion show, whatever it was, Chase was there, front and center, cheering them on. He had gone to D.C. almost weekly to support Odessa, to give her the momentum she needed. He cheered on every piece of legislation, held her hand during election results, rioted in the streets. He had gotten to see Liam and Jordan get married, gotten to meet their kids, gotten to be an Uncle to them. He had gotten to see Agnes take over the world, he had given so much of his heart to her daughter, watched proudly as they got accepted into top colleges and formed their own little crew amongst each other. He had seen Mariela get married and welcomed in her children with open arms, grateful of the love she had given him over the years. He had gotten to see Haven and Emory grow, and had made sure that all their kids felt that he was the number one Uncle  He had gotten to marry his best friend and spend the majority of his life loving a woman who he knew he was created to love. He had lived a life he was proud of, one that wouldn’t be forgotten. 

His last moments were quiet. He had been surrounded by his family, Odessa right next to him as she always had been. They had sensed it and even though he had no ability to tell them all, they knew. If he had been able to express how he felt he would have told them again and again how much he loved them. He would have held his children close, kissed their faces and let them know that the pain would pass and he’d be with them wherever they went. He’d hold Oddie’s face in his hands and tell her that in his entire life, she was the greatest thing to ever happen to him. That there was no Chase without Odessa. That she’d be okay. That he’d love her always, he’d be next to her, as he always had been. He wanted to tell his friends that they made his life rich and full, that they were the best family he could ask for. He had said all of this to them in the past years but he wanted to remind them, to help them be okay once he was gone, to help them through, to be there even when he couldn’t be. 

But the moment came quietly. One moment he was there and the next he wasn’t. The quiet consumed the room, tears already falling as Chase took his final breath. It had been what he wanted. He had wanted to go in his own home, with the people he loved, in a place that embodied who and what he was. 

In his New York Times interview, the last question Chase had been asked had been, “If you wanted the world to remember one thing after you’re gone? What would it be?”

He had smiled, sat back in his chair and taken a deep breath. “I’d want the world to know that sometimes life doesn’t turn out how you planned. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be amazing. It sounds cheesy but when I’m gone, I just want the world...my loved ones to know that I lived my life with an open heart and that my life has been so full because of it. Love, love until your lungs give out, love until you can’t take it, love what you do, love who you are, love those around you. Love, love and continue to give love and receive love. Yeah...love, I’m gonna go with that.”

🥘- Are you good at cooking? What is the best dish you have made? Alternatively, how bad are you at cooking? What’s the worst dish you’ve made?

I’ve only ever really made deserts, but I consider myself pretty good at it? My favorite thing to make (and eat) are rolled sugar cookies. The worst thing I’ve made HAS to go to the time I tried to make microwave noodles and forgot to add water, resulting in the whole thing catching fire and making the kitchen smell like chemical smoke for a week (microwave noodles isn’t really cooking but still). The worst thing (objectively) that I actually make from scratch that tastes a whole lot better than it sounds is scrambled eggs that’s only…2/3rds of the way cooked? It made me sick once but it’s…worth it.

🛁- What do you do to treat yourself?

I buy myself patches and stickers from etsy or redbubble. Sometimes merchandise from favored franchises if it’s available.

⚽️- What games did you play with other kids when you were younger?

Okay buckle up ‘cause this is gonna be a ride.

ASKED SOMEONE TO MARRY YOU? Guilty KISSED ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS? Innocent DANCED ON A TABLE IN A BAR/TAVERN? Innocent EVER TOLD A LIE? Guilty HAD FEELINGS FOR SOMEONE WHOM YOU CAN’T HAVE? Guilty EVER KISSED SOMEONE OF THE SAME SEX? Innocent EVER KISSED SOMEONE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX? Guilty KISSED A PICTURE? Innocent SLEPT IN UNTIL 5PM? Guilty FALLEN ASLEEP AT WORK/SCHOOL? Guilty HELD A SNAKE? Innocent BEEN SUSPENDED FROM SCHOOL? Guilty WORKED AT A FAST FOOD CHAIN/RESTAURANT? Guilty STOLEN SOMETHING? Innocent BEEN FIRED FROM A JOB? Guilty DONE SOMETHING YOU REGRET? Guilty LAUGHED UNTIL SOMETHING YOU WERE DRINKING CAME OUT OF YOUR NOSE? Innocent CAUGHT A SNOWFLAKE ON YOUR TONGUE? Innocent KISSED IN THE RAIN? Innocent SAT ON A ROOF TOP? Guilty KISSED SOMEONE YOU SHOULDN’T? Innocent SANG IN THE SHOWER/BATH? Innocent BEEN PUSHED INTO A POOL WITH ALL YOUR CLOTHES ON? Guilty SHAVED YOUR HEAD? Innocent SLEPT NAKED? Guilty MADE A BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND CRY? Guilty SHOT A GUN? Guilty STILL LOVED SOMEONE YOU SHOULDN’T? Guilty HAVE/HAD A TATTOO? Innocent LIKED SOMEONE, BUT WILL NEVER TELL WHO? Guilty BEEN TOO HONEST? Innocent RUINED A SURPRISE? Innocent BEEN TOLD THAT YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL/CUTE BY SOMEONE WHO TOTALLY MEANT WHAT THEY SAID? Guilty STILL HAVE COMMUNICATION W/ YOUR EX? Guilty* CHEATED ON SOMEONE? Innocent GOT SO ANGRY THAT YOU CRIED? Innocent TRIED TO STAY AWAY FROM SOMEONE FOR THEIR OWN GOOD? Innocent THOUGHTS ABOUT SUICIDE? Guilty THOUGHTS ABOUT MURDER? Guilty HOW ABOUT MASS MURDER? Innocent STALKED SOMEONE? Innocent HAD A GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND? Guilty GOTTEN TOTALLY DRUNK DURING A HOLIDAY? Innocent

* He kinda has to. With all the stuff going on.

Tagged by: found it somewhere

nail biting | throat clearing | lying | interrupting | chewing the ends of pens | smoking | swearing | knuckle cracking | thumb sucking | muttering under their breath | talking to themselves | nose picking | binge drinking | oversleeping | snacking between meals | skipping meals | picking at skin | impulse buying | talking with their mouth full | humming/singing to themselves | chewing gum | leg jiggling | foot tapping | hair twirling | whistling | eye rolling | licking lips | sniffing | squinting | rubbing hands together | jaw clenching | gesturing while talking | putting feet up on tables | tucking hair behind ears | chewing lips | crossing arms over chest | putting hands on hips | rubbing the back or their neck | being late | procrastinating | doodling | shredding paper | peeling off bottle labels | forgetfulness | running hands through hair | overreacting | teeth grinding | nostril flaring | slouching | pacing | drumming fingers | fist clenching | pinching bridge of nose | rubbing temples | rolling shoulders Tagged by: I stole it again. 
Tagging: @mxxnchiild @googleoliver @voiceintheradio

easily scared | whiny | repetitive | selfish | arrogant | easily excitable | too silly| stubborn | blank minded | overly cautious | loud | easily bored | untrustworthy | disloyal | manipulative | over sensitive | possessive | clingy | obnoxious | gullible| annoying | judgemental | tactless | merciless | unlucky | soft-hearted | sarcastic | reckless | paranoid | unsophisticated | pushy | self critical | smart-ass | solemn | erratic | antisocial | complex | dubious | egotistical | tongue-tied | temperamental | lazy | sadist | masochist | predictable

Tagged by: y’all know me, I find this stuff and just... steal it.