#ableist comments

my ex (who’s a shitty person anyway but that’s another story) used to say those things to me a lot, that i wasn’t doing everything i can to not be disabled so i deserved the pain i was in, i deserved to faint, i brought it on myself so i deserved it

what she forgot is that i was a cripple before i started doing those things. in fact, i sort of used them to cope for a while because my brain is Not Nice about me being disabled (it’s Not Nice about anything really, but this post isn’t about my brain)

so here’s your reminder that disabled people can smoke, drink, be ‘lazy’ and do whatever the fuck we want, and your opinion on it is bullshit. and if you’re disabled, here’s your reminder that you don’t need to feel guilty for doing ‘unhealthy’ things, we all have our vices, ways of coping and things we just enjoy doing, and anyone who shames you for them can go fuck themselves.

Basically because disabled, and I sent the Robin Chronic Fatigue simulator game review video to them to watch, which it doesn't sound like she could even watch one 7 minute review video of a game that would have perfectly explained to her what life with my condition is like and why i don't have spoons/time to keep up with all that, despite expecting me to spend hours catching up on her videos that took her less effort to make than it does me to view and respond as a person living with chronic fatigue and daily sedation. And I thought I was explaining it all nicely and calmly.

And I actually can't afford the stress of dealing with that refusal to communicate properly (me being rational despite being the autistic one?) and instead resorting to hurling insensitive comments to me and tryna gaslight me. No thanks. I am allergic to stress it flares up so many issues for me (my immune system is down already bc of the season changing and being sick etc)