#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh

oh

having autism (i guess that's the reason?) sucks bc i like sexual topics/talking abt and seeing sexual themes but i don't want to have sex bc of the sensations/textures/goop.

like i think i would throw up if i got cum on me/in me lol

doesn't matter what gender they are i just....can't.

and idek when this changed like i was fine and horny and now i'm never horny and nearly repulsed by thinking of having sex with anyone.

i wouldn't even fuck tobias at this point (ik, something is major wrong here) although i would snuggle the hell out of him lol

anyways, idk, am i having another sexuality crisis or am i just old and don't want to fuck.

i'mma perv but only in theory, not in practice, ya know? i don't even masturbate anymore :/

if anyone relates, pls let me know bc i feel very alone and very bad as a bf abt this.

...i hate it with such a burning passion that i will sometimes just want to shOoT asmr creators.

like-

sTOP WHISPERING LIKE THAT I CAN HEAR THE SPIT MOVING IN YOUR MOUTH JESUS CHRIST-

and like- the vids keep popping up on my youtube or instagram and i'm just like *proceeds to yeet the phone*

one time this cousin of mine came over. she lOVES asmr. she sat next to me on a TRAIN and listened to ASMR on FULL VOLUME apparently trying to sLeEP.

there wwere spoons clacked on the mike like 'trrrrrrrrrrrrr' and then sLIME going 'kchkchkchkch' anD THE WOMAN WOULDN'T STOP WHISPERING.

'tptptptppttpptpttp' hER 'T' NOISES WERE INFURIATING. THE NOISE OF THE--THE LIKE SPIT ON THE MOUTH WERE LIKE 'pchpchpchpch' EUGH PLS-

hi, i'm rhiice!

stuff about me:

she/her, cishet

pianist of 6 yrs

minor

draws sometimes (not rlly good at it tbh)

filipino/american

interests/likes:

classicaloid

object shows (bfdi, one, ii, aib)

a good amount of classical music

hamilton

total drama

tally hall

touhou

rolli und rita

vocaloid

nyan neko sugar girls

HOT CHOCOLATE.

so many other things that i can't remember (you'll probably learn them overtime)

dni list

urghh basic dni criteria

certain dsmp fans (not all)

zoophiles

proshippers

people that i don't like in general