#a+ guide

So what do I mean by this

Basically

Read a lot. Learn a lot by reading a lot

Knowing where to read a lot, have variety ykwim

Be smart but the chaotic academic way

In this age, it is very important to educate yourself if the world won’t do it for you

WHERE TO FIND INFORMATION

First, how do you find places to lurk in and gain info from (for books):

Where to find recommendations : literally anywhere but my favorite place is pinterest

Read for free: onlinereadfreenovel.com , novel80.com, 

Download for free : OceanofPDF , Planet eBook, d-pdf.com, pdfdrive.com, even pinterest (I once found the entire cruel prince series and the heroes of olympus series on it)

Yeah a library is a place of books, but most importantly, it's a hub of knowledge . Some places where you can learn a lot of include: articles, channels, interviews, websites, audiobooks, aka the media

HOW TO LEARN AND INTERACT WITH THIS INFO

How to force yourself to learn it in the first place: Have the page up and let it sit there on an interesting page (or article or point of the movie) so that when you remember and glance at it you’ll want to read or know more and keep going.

The best way to know a lot about something is to deep dive into it and the best way to do that is to rabbit hole. For medias and books, you can start by researching:

Their sources

Their author/directors/creator’s : other works, inspirations or any considered successor, life (specific experiences that might have shaped who they are)

How to interact with the knowledge you’ve just learn

Discuss it, debate it, teach it, sing it, write it, just share it

HOW TO ORGANIZE ALL THESE BOOKS (what I do)

Make folders on File Explorer or alternatives (for e.g. i have a folder of all my books and another for my movies with subfolders)

Make lists of books you have and books on the tbr list

Sites/apps for notetaking : Notion, Obsidian, Arena, Milanote

So before we start, this advice will come from lived experience, and works best on conservative religious parental figures. But not all people are the same, and different things work on different people.

If your parents notice you have done something radical to your appearance (cut hair, grew it longer, anything not stereotypically your perceived gender, etc.) reassure them it is just "teenage rebellion". Cite some rebellious thing your parents did as teenagers, and reassure them that you'll "laugh about it" in a few years.

If your family goes to a Christian church, try to go along quietly. Those services usually don't last more than three hours and you'll keep up your appearance as "a good kid" if that is your reputation or you'll gain some favour from your parents or something along those lines. I know those services are not fun, as someone who went to them for my whole childhood, but trust me, it will keep suspiciousness off your back extremely well

I highly recommend that you do all your queer-related googles in incognito mode. And if you do art, draw something wholesome, like cats, and use that to cover any overtly queer art/physical media. And I also recommend hiding Tumblr.

If there is is extremely high suspicion of queerness, then you must use the diversion tactics. For suspected non-straight sexual orientation, have a casual conversation about your parent's marriage and how you desire a similar one or talk about the cute boy/girl down the street, but make it sound natural. That last part is important. For suspected genderqueer ness, do one stereotypical thing for your perceived gender. For example: my parents were quite surprised that I cut my hair short. (It was shoulder length actually, not even that short) So I painted my nails.

Assess risk of being kicked out. If you ever overhear your parents talking about kicking their child out of the house for coming out, then that's not good and perhaps more stealth measures should be implemented. Evaluate general attitude towards queer people. Most likely it's not going to be good, but some are like "I don't care what they do but they shouldn't do it in front other kids.", some are like "I just don't want to do their 'life style' but others are more "God made man and woman in his image. Homosexuality is a perversion against God." The latter is more likely to take extreme action against you if you are found out. (Source: have you seen those anti-pride protests?)

I hope my advice has been helpful. As always, hopefully you have someone else who is supportive, and when you move out, you'll be able to live life on your terms.