#584th

I strolled around looking at all my Instagram posts again, I realized I have made lots of wonderful experiences out there even if at the time they happened, I might have felt scared or embarrased as f*ck.

I started this post, but then failed to write anything further. And I recalled something I always liked from ‘Stuck in Love’ - one of my favorite movies. I can’t remember exactly the wording, so I ended up distracting myself away finding the movie script. 

I finally found the part I was talking about.

-You know Flannery O'Connor? -I know Flannery O'Connor. -She said nothing needed to happen in a writer's life after they were 20. By then, they had experienced more than enough to last their creative life.  -So what's your point? -My point is...[...] Rusty... I don't think you're experiencing enough. I mean, the reason that you're comfortable leaving your goddamn journal on my desk is because there's nothing you're trying to hide from me in your life. And that really worries me, you know? Sweet, sensitive guys like you, they spend their entire high school years frozen in place while... everybody is running around going to parties and getting laid, doing whatever. I don't want you to look back years from now and think about this girl. Is it Kate? 

-Yeah.

[...]

-Rusty, a writer is the sum of their experiences. Go get some.

I guess I wanna leave it here to remind me one more time. Though I’m not sure what I am trying to remind myself about lol

Like, I can’t write about all what I’ve experienced so far (or more like, I have written them all in my diaries but not cohesively as in a full story). 

I don’t think I produce any good writing these days. Don’t even know if I can really write something at all...

I feel like I’m still just in relapse.