#32419

Sana this time ay maging okay na sa mata itong bagong tumblr account ko.

Hindi naman mahirap umulit. Mas mahirap magsimula. Maraming bagong pupunan. Pero nakakatamad din kasi maraming gustong dapat mahigitan. Maraming alaalang gustong balikan. Yung mga aalalahanin mo tungkol sa lumipas na panahon. Kaya dapat mas malakas na ang loob ngayon, at bukas. 

Pero kung sisipagin ka sa pagsisimula mo, parang paglipat lang pala ng bagong bahay ang lahat. Bagong disenyo ng bahay, mga kwarto, mga appliance, mga kulay ng gamit, dingding, bintana. Halos lahat bago. Bagong kapit bahay. At higit sa lahat, ikaw din mismo ay dapat bago. Bagong pakiramdam. Bagong pagkakainteresan. *langhap malalim* Dapat alam mo sa sarili mong kailangan mong magbago kasi nagsisimula ka ulit. Ang maganda dun, ikaw ang designer at boss sa baging bahay. Ikaw ang pipili kung saan ilalagay ang bawat gamit. Ikaw ang pipili kung sino ang magiging bago mong kapitbahay na kadaldalan. Ganun.

Marami pang bagay na ikokonsidera. Ang importante, sana ngayon, mas magiging sentro ko na ang sarili ko, ang mga bagay na nagpapasaya sa akin, at ang mga taong importante sa akin. Alam kong hindi magiging perpekto. Alam kong hindi lahat sasang-ayon. Pero importante ba yun? Basta sarado ang pinto at bintana ko para sa mga bagay na ayaw ko sa loob ng bahay ko.

Everytime I feel bad abt a situation or issue i can talk to my significant other and they always find a way to reassure me that everything will be okay, or we will find a way to get to that point in time. It’s so relieving to know someone feels the same way as you do and they love you. I appreciate being able to be myself and let my guard down because I’ve had it constantly up for years..

I don’t want to rush but I enjoy your company and all the fun we have together. It rly is all about who makes you laugh. And who you can call your best pal at the end of the day. It feels good to not feel uncertain about how someone feels about you, or where a relationship is going. It’s nice to be able to confide w someone about things and know they won’t judge you or just throw in the towel bc they gotta bend over backwards a bit. A real relationship takes so much. A lot I haven’t gotten to experience or understand yet, but I hope to get to in the future. I’m thankful to be with someone who’s so kind and patient to me, who understands my trauma and is showing me what a real relationship is. It’s not always easy to hear your flaws but that’s what you do when you care about someone, you fix yourself! For you, and for the people you care about.