#20thoughts

20 Days To Go

Last week, I decided that I have to stop. I decided to take a break and give myself the time I deserve. This madness has been killing me from inside for months now.  Attacking every happy thought that rarely comes into my mind. This urge needs to be released and set free.  There is a “craving” inside me that tells me to live my life like a “normal and self-entitled millennial” that I should be.…

i always thought we’d break up because of your career but apparently you “just not feeling it anymore” was never an immediate option. everyone thought that was super shady but i have several thoughts on our not-so-amicable break up.

1. you’re secretly a sociopath 2. you feed off the new and exciting feelings of a relationship 3. you couldn’t handle how well things were going 4. you will regret this one day 5. i hope it’s soon 6. i hope you feel worse and worse as time goes on 7. you will never find someone as great as me 8. why do you still have my things 9. why do you not want your things back 10. i will never trust you again 11. even though i’m convinced we belonged together 12. i hope you never find happiness 13. i say that out of anger 14. and if you never do find happiness, that’s awful 15. and says a lot about you 16. i’ll always love you 17. but i hate you a lot 18. i still smell your shirt that you left behind 19. but most importantly...and i hate to admit it 20. i miss you so much

there’s not a day that goes by that i don’t think about you. and i’m still seriously getting over this because, even though my ex-fiance was a complete douche bag for 5 years, you made me think everything was fine one day and told me otherwise the next. i try to let it go as much as possible but i feel emotionally drained and taken advantage of. i wish i could tell you that you’re a piece of shit to your face. but i kinda never wanna see you again. i hope you never get the things you want out of life. i hope you always reach out for what you want and the minute you think you’ll get it, it’s gone - taken away from you - like what you took away from me. good luck, asshole.