The “Ten Years of Sherlock I Did Tell You But Did You Listen” Anniversary Cake:
57 because thrilling that you’ve been counting.
The chemical structure of adrenaline because there’s nothing as attractive as facing dangerous situations and people alongside a brave and wise and dangerous madman.
Purple buttons because there is tension to be found as far as the eye can see.
A pink rope lest we forget that a genius man’s Achilles heel isn’t the drugs or the intellectual thrill of the chase - it’s his damsel in distress.
Three elephants in a particular flag’s colours lest we neglect to mention the elephant in the room.
Ombré flower decorations because one must absolutely be able to differentiate between lilac and purple. Only important things are stored in the mind palace.
A glass cup of tea because a cup of tea is code.
Cigarettes because modern addictions parallel Victorian subtext and because I’ve never begged for anything in my life but I’ll beg for cigarettes from you. Twice.
A formula written in rainbow that might appear indecipherable but what if I told you that women are not my area? Is it clearer now?
A silver silhouette of a Vitruvian man’s ideal man.
A razor because he prefers his doctors clean shaven but I don’t shave for Sherlock Holmes I promise.
A white sheet because not wearing pants may make him laugh but it also leaves him feeling exposed. A napkin, maybe?
A dark pool of water and a very particular brand of underwear because tearing clothes off in a darkened swimming pool might make people talk.
Green carnations because the truth is rarely pure and never simple.
Fairy sprinkle buttons. Like a fairy. But don’t worry it’s all fine, Mrs. Turner Mrs. Hudson’s got married ones.
Tall silver candles for a cool Byronic hero and shorter golden candles for his conductor of light. For a brave soldier. For a smart man, even smarter than he looks. Who becomes even more observant when Daddy’s gone. Who wouldn’t be surprised if Daddy called him by his Christian name.
And a flashback to a random year in the Victorian era that just happens to coincide with the year of an infamous trial that that compelled the Great Detective and his Boswell to “depart to the countryside” for a few weeks. A coincidence, perhaps? Although the universe is rarely so lazy.
Hmm, there’s something happening here but I can’t quite put my finger on it - it’s on the top of my tongue it’s on the tip of my tongue it’s on the tip - oh right, it’s called “queer baiting.”
But it could have been “the greatest love story never told.”
What’s the matter? Are you having an earthquake? Feel like you’ve been distracted? Derailed?
Might I prevail upon you to use your powers of deduction: by appearance it’s just a cake - a lovely, if quirky, white wedding cake - and that’s a perfectly sound analysis..
...but if you care to go deeper, to open the file, to crack the case and discover who you really are and who you could yet become...you might just find a rainbow...
You can see an idiot video I made featuring the cake on my insta @sabreflavour ❤️🧡💛💚💙
@inevitably-johnlocked @88thparallel @shrlckholmes @sherlockmeta @loudest-subtext-in-tv @the-7-percent-solution @tjlcisthenewsexy @bakerstbitches @devoursjohnlock @gosherlocked @its-sherlock-once-things @barbsiebabe @leauki @coffeeteaitsallfine @iheardyou @mrwatsonmrholmes @colourfulwatson
(If you would like to be untagged please just let me know - I just wanted to tag some of the pages that I’ve really admired in this space🙏🏽)
