#01252017

Ya girl got 3 gold keys and 1 silver key out of 6 pieces I’ve submitted and also got the most out of the people from my art studio

we went to asheville today which was actually so lovely and i think it would be such a cute place to live and i love driving with you and the fact that you listened to the witch, please podcast with me and there's something so goddamn comforting to me about being in the car with you maybe just a significant amount of the time we spend together is with you driving and we somehow got on the topic of past relationships and how i may have not been in the healthiest ones but theyve taught me a lot and being with you has made me realize the way they have kind of fucked me up which i had surprisingly never really realized before i dont often talk about the things i want to change in my life but sometime recently ive decided to actively try to stop over apologizing for things and start thanking people and appreciating people for things instead i am so worried about being too much or not enough or too opinionated or too quiet and i never want to be a burden and it never occurred to me that you dont think of me as a burden "i appreciate you and the fact that u still love me even tho im kind of a cunt" you told me that I need to "realign being with someone who truly loves you and wants to see you be the strongest and happiest you can be" im not entirely sure whether it's the way i grew up and the fact that the relationships ive been in have reinforced this idea of inadequacy in me but to have you explicitly tell me that i am not a burden was actually very reassuring to me and i didnt understand how much i needed that until you told me and i do feel at some level i do feel that i am not a burden to you but it's the rational versus anxiety in my mind and so i just really appreciate the fact that you care enough about me to continuously stay with me and reassure me about things that i shouldnt need to be reassured about