#*luana

Text from Ryan: You’re looking for Luana Keli’i, Hawaiian lady, wears lots of florals, about 5 ft. Sending you my brother’s list of places she likes but my guess is she’s prowling for useless junk in the Spice District. Check out the markets first. Her default state is On High Alert because she’s paranoid as fuck and believes anti-anxiety medication is the devil and/or a government conspiracy so don’t follow her too close. Also I’m pretty sure she has a 360 degree field of vision. 

I haven’t spoken to her in 3 years. Don’t make me break my streak. 

OZANA: Yeesh, talk about mommy issues. 

LUANA: I don't know who you are, but you need to back off. OZANA: Ow–that hurts! Stop whacking me! LUANA: Then stop following me! OZANA: I’m not! I mean I am, but it’s not anything weird.  LUANA: It’s weird to follow strangers.  OZANA: I just, uhh, I’ve never been to the market before and you seemed like a pro, you know? Wasn’t sure where to start or how to haggle with the vendors so I thought hmm, this lady seems like she knows shit – sorry. Stuff.  LUANA: Bullshit.  OZANA: Oh my god, if you hypothetically had an estranged son he would be exactly like you. 

LUANA: I do, and he’s not. 

OZANA: Are you sure? Because —

LUANA: You’re being weird again. And if you need to know, which you don’t, my estranged son is more driven and passionate than I’ll ever be. Stubborn as a mountain, but when he uses it for good — actually, why am I telling you all this? Leave me alone. OZANA: Aw. You love him.

LUANA: Of course I do, he’s my son. Pain in the ass, unlike the other one, but you can’t win ‘em all. So, are you going to leave me alone now? 

OZANA: Actually…just one more thing.

CAMILLA: What are you making, Chef? 

RYAN: Menu needed a dessert so, guava chiffon cake. Well, plasma chiffon cake. Plasmafruit has a weirdly malleable taste. Definitely a little bloody, since plasma trees only grow when you water them with blood, but I think these big ones could be way more versatile than normal. Try this.

CAMILLA: Wow! Not at all what I expected. It’s tangy and sweet!

RYAN: Perfect.

CAMILLA: Can I ask why this dessert?

RYAN: Well, the plasmafruit will work with the color for one. And, I don’t know, it just came to mind. My brother and I used to have guava chiffon cake from the bakery on our birthday, but then everything on the island started to get expensive because of all the tourists and we couldn’t afford to go there anymore. So I learned to make it myself. Always been a favorite. 

CAMILLA: Didn’t expect you to be the sentimental type, Chef.

RYAN: I’m not. I just like making good food. 

CAMILLA: Still, it changes my impression of you. I thought you’d be so serious, but I’m starting to think you’re actually really easy to get along with. 

RYAN: Funny, I thought you’d be easy to get along with, but I’m starting to think you really like pissing me off.

CAMILLA: I can’t deny that. But you don’t mind…do you? 

RYAN: No, I don’t. 

[KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK]

RYAN: Uh, sorry, I gotta—

CAMILLA: No, yes, of course. 

LUANA: Online it says you’re supposed to be open, and I came all the way from Spice District! Update your website!! I’m leaving a ONE STAR REVIEW if you don’t seat me in the next FIVE minutes!!

RYAN: We’re CLOSED, ma’am!! 

LUANA: Oh. It’s you.