#*itsnotreal

TRIGGER WARNINGS: Violence, murder, death

PARASITE

I can see my corpse in reflections

She's sitting in the corner of my eye

There's nowhere I can hide

I can't sleep at night anymore

The terrors take control over my mind

I can't rid myself of this parasite

Eat me like a cannibal

Treat me like an animal

Empty means nothing to me

Where you going honey?

I don't know me anymore

Hide under the sheets

I'm a parasite

It isn't just anxiety

BALL AND CHAIN

Nothing is ever simple

I just live that way

There's glass on the floor

I think it hit my brain

The universe said that I would be someone

Don't speak

This happens all the time

There's something kinda ugly taking up my mind

Don't leave

I promise, I'll be fine

At night, I dream of the end

I wake up and find, I'm alone in my bed

The older I get, the more I hate the truth

I feel my mortality like I'm staring down a gun

The world is screaming at me, "Run"

I feel the end of the universe

It's in my head all the time

It surrounds me

It's in me

I think the universe is mine

WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE

We're all gonna die

I'm trying not to be manic, but my blood starts to panic

I can't see me at all

All the sound stops, and I'm left with my thoughts

I can't seem to feel it at all

The thing with beauty, it's a matter of time

Where do we go?

We're just making up religions on our way out the door

These sleepless nights take a toll

I don't wanna have a brain

The bugs are under my skin, they whisper solеly in sin

In the end, were we ever alive?

If you knew what was next, what would you do there?

When you're six feet down, what part of you would still be around?

It's just a matter of time

We don't know when and we don't know why

FUNERAL

The guilt, it cuts like a knife

Memories eat up my mind

I let you paint me the villain

After all this time, I'm haunted by your ghost

I kinda wanna laugh at the way I criеd

I've been putting on a smile, though somebody died

I don't know how to act to pretend it's fine

I'm so happy at this funeral

I really don't wanna hear it

"I'm sorry" burns like it's searing

My last nerve just hit the ceiling

I'm so numb

Now tell the world how she made you fucking miserable

She had to be alone

HE ASKED FOR IT

I squished his head like a berry would pop between my thumbs

He was almost begging for it

I wasn't the only one

He was out here searching for blood

I just gave him what he wanted so that the job could be done

He asked for it

He wanted this

He's in a pit

Man, what a bitch

It really wasn't too hard to read it between the lines

Heard a cacophony chorus scrеaming for him to be mine

He screamed a little too when he saw my face in his eyes

He asked for the blood that I gave him when he was out walking that night

I already told you that he asked it

Thought you said you like your girls savage

Let's see who can tattletale the fastest

I'll bury the body like a bad bitch

I told him why I was there

He was never ever mislead

I am the judgement and jury watching him walking the ledge

We spoke for a moment or two

He didn't have enough breath

But in the end, we both agreed that he was better off dead

PREDATOR

Something's there

It's just a twinge

I am what remains

You better run, I've got the gun

I am the parasite under your skin

I am the predator hiding within

I'm what your churches call a, "Saint"

I am the reason you feel faint

I am the war where everyone falls

PARTY ANIMAL

Somebody seize her

Baby, do you wanna go Tandem?

You're gonna make me throw a tantrum

I don't wanna be dramatic, but you're making me an addict

Somebody called me Aphrodite

I'm a little like Psyche

She's part animal

She's got her leopard print purse in the back of the bar

I don't even know her name, but I know she's a star

She don't even have to speak, boys fall at her feet

She's got big doe eyes with the venomous teeth

She's so cool

She's the only woman in the room

I think I wanna be her, too

She's in all of the action

She's like the main attraction

Look at her in your clothes

It ain’t that complicated

Nothin' left you could tame

APHRODITE

Were you as lonely as me?

Did it make you feel more free?

Do they want me for my body?

*Name*, help me up

I feel jealous of someone

Lock me in your chains, I dare you

I'm scared of how you prayed

Just let me out my cage

Only one of us can stay

It didn’t seem that bad at all

A simple price to pay

I'd be the one to blame

CUPID

You look happier without me than you did when I was around

Did you change your medication like we always talked about?

Did I take all of it with me now that you can't hear me cry?

Did I love too much or not enough?

Was it worth the price of losing "us"?

I wish I didn't have a heart that could break

See you're with another blonde

Should I let all mine grow out?

Did I make your meals, did I get it right?

Was it worth it, being the love of my life?

Why'd you do this?

Why are you so ruthless?

ALWAYS THE ARTIST

Always the artist, but never the muse

How I'd love to spend a lifetime of being pursued

Cursed to write poetry without any road for me

I don't know which feeling is worse

To be an artist without a pen or a muse without an artist

I guess, either way, it just works

I'd pin up your paintings all over town

My love could be a thing you could never put down

The devil's just out of reach

I swear to God he's out for me

A fear that I'll never outrun

I feel deeper than an ocean floor

The heart on my sleeve has worn off

I've never had enemies, but plenty of scars

Though they've all healed, they still pull at my heart

It was nothing you said or what you hadn't done

All the things I would give to be loved by someone

RELIGION

I like the skin on his cheek

I like the venom he leaves whenever he's mean to me

I like the spark on his tongue

Think I might die from his love

My baby's a loaded gun

This is something deeper

I found my religion

Good God, he's a vision

Heaven's not enough 'cause he's above where angels visit

Takes me to Nirvana, he's my holy karma

I'm my baby's anthem

All my light is just a symptom

Don’t save me ‘cause I’m possessed

Think I've got a fever

Hold my head above water when the waves are crashing down

He won't let me touch the ground

Lay me down on the altar

Forever's what I'll vow

I'm so devout

SPIDER STRING

You'll see me when you blink

I'll weave the spider string

It's been hours, but I still feel it in the middle of my spine

A kaleidoscope of color, think that I'm burning alive

I'd rather rot and ravage with the bugs and E Coli

Lie in the hollows of the earth, somewhere that they'll never die

Let me decay

I'm in your mind

I symbolized the fear that eats your brain

Ask why I haven't been tamed

You'd never ask a widow why she's weaving that way

I've been too numb to feel the pain

At least they use my remains

IT'S NOT REAL

Please make it stop

Make it go away

Being forced to pick and choose our roles is a scam and curse we cast

Do we still follow those who made us pick and choose those roles?

It's not real

We're only human

We make mistakes

What if they put our lives at stake?

Our ancestors, the misbehaved, were chained and locked away in caves

I'm left wondering, "Who's to blame?"

This ain't fun for me anymore

I'm not joking anymore

I killed me the other night

Kissed her cheek and said, "Goodbye"

All I've wanted never mattered

It's all, "Don't quit," there's no way out

My nerves are split and full of doubt

We're all pointless, it's all pointless

Everything always has an end

Why can't just once logic bend?

Am I just gonna be a useful tool?

Sit still, calm down, have some tea, talk it out

No, I won't sit idly by while no-one else cares for the end of all-time

Where will we go when we die?