#*given.

we were both tethered on broken images of ourself,  forgetting and drifting we never knew the sensation of having our feet safe on on the ground. until we fell into each other and found home. 

you have always been loud. neon outlined and wholly center of attention but your heart was a spasm of over-felt emotions cloaked in a jovial smile. you were just two ,your mother and you and you watched over her the best the little you could.  but then you crashed into him and things grew. you had found him by himself and he caught you between his eyes and you became his friend, holding his hand as his father was taken into custody, holding his hand through your school years and holding his hand through his firsts. you learnt as you grew up that there was something he filled in you. he gave you the quiet so that you didn’t always have to be  brave and he gave you comfort to show that you mattered. and so you became his shield, you became the sound of him so he didn’t have to over stretch himself and you forgot that he was a person in himself and not a god to be worshipped and pleased alone.  and that you didn’t have to concern yourself with being every part for him.  and so when you drifted off to music leaving him to the side you didn’t see that he didn’t want gifts he wanted memories, he wanted to expand and be with you, not be perceived as some one needing distance from the world by you. you love him too much ,  there was no edges to your love for him but it blinded you at times and it brought the world crashing down on top you both. and so when you argued, when he questioned exactly how far you’d go for him in his feelings of entrapment, you decided that the best thing for him was for you to die. and so you drank out your fears and your sadness, and hanged yourself so that he could have what he needed.