This is in regards to your post about pain from June.
I haven’t had a pain-free day since August 1994. Knees, shoulders, plantar fasciitis, stomach pain, headaches, and a lot of other stuff. Some days are definitely better than others, but every single day there is pain. And yes, just like you, I am very much aware that there are many people who have it worse, whose pain is more severe, who are constantly on at least a 7 on the pain scale.
But here’s the kicker: pain and illness are not a competition. You don’t have to *win* at pain or illness top trumps to get the right to complain about it or to want it to go away. People without chronic pain often have no idea how much even a 2 sucks if it stays for days, weeks, months or years. They only hear that today it‘s a 2. And yesterday was the same. Just as the day before. And the one before that. A 2 isn’t that bad. No, not for a day or two. But again, after weeks and weeks, and the occasional change to a 4 or 5, it just sucks. It drains you.
So please, go ahead and complain. You have every right to do so. And when some jackass - that includes yourself 😉 - tries to tell you otherwise, just ask them: Would they rather smash their thumb with a hammer and have it at 7 or 8-9 for a minute and then dwindle down, or would they really prefer a daily 2-5 for the next few years. I know what my answer would be, and I guess I know yours.
i wasn't expecting to cry tonight but ok
I went back to my archive from June (when I was in a much worse headspace than I am now) to see which post you meant and I just want to say thank you. For seeing that and for caring enough to send this to basically a stranger. Thank you so much.
And thank you for this because I think I have genuinely forgotten that people who aren't ill don't see pain the same way we do. You're right about everything and the reminder really helps. The end part especially.
And I don't want to use your pain as a benchmark or something like that but since 1994 is a long time to be in pain. My first doctor's appointment for it was May 2015, I don't remember exactly when the pain itself started but it was some time in 2014. And hearing from someone else who has been living with pain for what is nearly thirty years really really means a lot to me. It feels impossible at times to imagine living on in pain, you know? But it's not. And people do it. And I can do it.
So thank you very much for this. It's incredibly kind of you. I hope you have lots of 1 and 2 days :)
