#*ask meme response

     “SORRY!” they very much are not, too busy flipping switches and throwing levers on the console to offer any actual consolation for letting their sibling quite literally dangle for twenty minutes. LISTEN - - - some sacrifices have to be made, and andro was perfectly safe up there! if there had been any real danger ondru would have worked harder to get them down safely. “you were FINE, anyways! i’m the one who had to do all the shooting while you HUNG OUT.”

     “what’s new?” they aren’t TRYING to be mean! it just seems to the captain that CHANGING ONES MIND is a constant in most creatures - forgetting why they wanted to do something else in the first place, or thinking it through just a little bit longer and realizing HEY, THIS IS A BETTER IDEA. the captain leans against the semi-ajar open of their tardis and glances over their shoulder back inside ; the engineer has vanished somewhere into the depths of the craft. “so, are you coming or what?”

     “alien thing.” the captain has their head tilted towards alice, voice pitched low so the giggling pair of aliens doesn’t overhear. the perils of bringing humans around to intergalactic spa complexes for some pampering is having to navigate the way things simply don’t translate - even with the translation circuit doing its thing. “they think your hands are weird. well, our hands, i suppose. five fingers instead of three,” they gesture with the frothy, oddly bright green drink in their hand to one of the hands of the aliens as they depart, still laughing. “you’ll get used to it, probably! happens pretty often.”

     “i wouldn’t call it UNBELIEVABLY stupid,” the captain flashes a grin, hand poised on the grate they’re in the process of wiggling out of place, “in fact, i think you’ll find it wholly BELIEVABLE.” listen, they try to stay out of trouble, they really do. the whole delving into everyones problems and trying to fix them and making them your problem too isn’t really the captain’s THING - - - pointed look at present company - - - but now that they’re here they might as well. what is it humans say? WHEN IN ROME, DO WHAT THE ROMANS DO? “you’re gonna owe me one for even getting involved in all this mess, truly.”

     “i’m alright, andro,” their voice is low and soft, one hand - bigger, now, broader fingers that they flex slightly, still tingly - rests on their siblings shoulder. a smile crosses new lips and ondru ducks their head to meet andro’s eyes. “still me. just - new. you know how it is. something would have to try a LOT harder than that to separate us.” the hand moves to pat andro’s shoulder and they step back and do a slow little spin, trying to lighten the mood, arms outstretched. “c’mon, what do you think, huh?”

     lips are tugged into a frown and they rock back on their heels. damn. you know, the whole COMFORTING thing has never really been the captain’s specialty. that’s something they tend to leave in the (not so) capable hands of the engineer, who is nowhere in site. the captain checked. “well. fuck them, then,” is what they finally settle on with a shrug and a hand patting her shoulder, “i mean, who needs them. if they laughed.”

     dark eyes blink once and their head cocks to the side, a cool sort of smile settling over the captain’s lips. OH. ALRIGHT. there is a certain level of condescending amusement in their face as they slide laser pistol back into its holster and tilt their head back towards the door that the cluster of REALLY FUCKING MAD humans is behind. at least they think it was humans. something that looked like a group of humans approximately fourteen seconds away from busting out the torches and pitchforks. “sounds like a GRAND plan!” they chirp cheerfully. overly cheerfully, really, hands sliding into the pockets of their slacks. “you want some backup in case they - what’re humans up to this time?” they check a watch on their wrist, “is it tarring and feathering still?”

     “i’m going to punt you out the door mid-flight.” it’s said flat and deadly serious, brows a dark slant over eyes that glitter with mischief despite the way one hand is cupping the LITERAL BITEMARK on their hand. “it’ll be a fun little experiment to see if the cold vacuum of space triggers FIGHT or BITE. what d’you say?” they shake their hand out and suddenly LUNGE for andro across the console, trying to drive the points of their fingers into her side.