He was stunned to silence. Ridley didn’t know how to act in a manner that wasn’t chaotic or destructive by any means. When he met Jongin, that urge was not there. He didn’t feel the need to squash the puny human, nor annoy him into a fight. It was an odd sense of peace, one that had him staring as the words flowed from the others lips. Hot cocoa, a movie, a snuggly blanket? Hardly the excitement he craved, lacking that rush of adrenaline that kept his heart beating. 

And yet he was perfectly content, finding himself leaning back into the embrace that Jongin provides. A pleasant purr rumbles through the shifters frame, his inner feline preening at the amount of attention he was receiving; oh how he was starved. Friends. It was a strange word to him even now, but inside he knew that he found a friend in Jongin. 

ridley had never been good with emotions. it had been a challenge for him since birth to the moment he had bonded with his spirit leopard, and it had certainly carried over with his time on earth. he wasn’t good with words, wasn’t good at controlling himself, or ever finding the most proper thing to say. he was at the point he never thought he would find happiness, find something that was worth fighting for even as it stared him down in the face. 

the words ‘i love you’ held a context he could never describe, couldn’t quite pinpoint the stutter in his heart, the way it fluttered in his chest threatening to take off. the feline could only assume it was some sort of defect, another thing he was bad at or had wrong with him. pessimism laid deep in his veins; the feline would have considered himself a lost cause.

then again, he never thought he’d meet someone like taemin. 

the days are shorter, the nights colder. growing up in the mountains with the snow, he adapted easily to the change. yet, he found himself clawing to stay in at nights. it felt perfect with the two of them tucked together, the only sound was their breathing as consciousness threatened to slip away. it’s hardly the picture perfect image; clothes are strewn everywhere - taemin’s shirt ripped in half and hanging from the ceiling fan. there’s blood drying on his hips where the other had gripped him a little too tightly. 

still, he’s content. rumbling away purrs as he shuffles that bit closer. inside, his feline was content - quiet and sated - a rarity, a gift from the divines themselves. he can feel the ache deep down in his bones, a feeling that goes ignored as he’s busy tracing the lines of taemin’s blissful face. ridley can’t help but stare at the human, stormy eyes glazed over in admiration. soft yet defined. perfection carved from what could only be blocks of the rarest marble, the man before him a rare light in a dark universe. 

finally, he thinks he understands. 

his touch is soft, a ghost of finger tips brushing back soft locks of hair from the others face. his heart is racing, threatening to burst from his chest as he’s overcome with emotions he doesn’t know how to handle. it’s suffocatingly sweet, contradicting over and over in his mind. it could only mean one thing.

the words are spoken softer than the stream of moonlight that comes in from his window, disappearing in the breeze of the fan. somehow he knows taemin can hear him, can feel what he feels, that burning flame that refuses to be doused.

this is what he’s been searching for. he had purpose, he had taemin and all the stars in creation wouldn’t bring him half the happiness.

he leans closer until their noses are brushing, breaths mingling between them. a smile curls at kitten lips, lashes fluttering as sleep starts to claim him.

“I can’t believe you’re making me do this.”

Ridley was about two seconds from wiping that smug look right off Taemin’s face.  His tongue was pressed to the inside of his cheek, a poor attempt to censor the thoughts going on in his mind. The other was still holding some sort of black pen that had drawn the whiskers on Ridley’s cheeks, because being a cat would be so funny. 

“I hate you, I want you to fall on a knife. Or my claws. Repeatedly.” While he had protested, it hadn’t really taken much to subdue the alien from partaking in the tradition. His lips were still swollen from the very compelling argument that the human had made. Combining that with a shake of a pill bottle, Ridley didn’t stand much of a chance. It was dirty. 

It made him mad that he hadn’t been able to try it first. 

The shifter sighs as pulls at the fastens of his jeans, doing them up as he walks over to the other. His lips part, mouth opening and tongue sticking out - asking for what he had been promised without so many words. Once the pills are placed on his tongue does he swallow them dry, humming a little at the bitter taste left on the muscle. There was no way he was going to be even slightly sober for this affair, the more drugs in his system the better.

Why wasn’t there a bottle of whiskey already in his hands?

“Okay, I’m ready to go.” With a hand placed on Taemin’s chest, he starts shoving the other backwards towards the entrance of his apartment. “What are you even supposed to be? I don’t understand this human.” He doesn’t have to look at the male to know that Taemin is rolling his eyes.  He can feel it in his stance, the silent stretch that follows after. After all, the other had been waiting over an hour at this point, between having to convince Ridley and wait through the very long and distracted process of him changing clothes - that may or have may not had a few detours. 

How could he complain when he still hadn’t gotten the proper feeling back in his legs? 

At last, they emerge from the apartment ready to go. Neither of them bother with the door, leaving it unlocked and open, the number swinging from the wood as it had been knocked off its hinges in their earlier debacle. There were claw marks on the frame from where Ridley had been clutching, the inside not in any better condition. It was like a scene from a movie, pillow feathers soaring around the room to collect in a big pile on the floor, scorch marks from sparks of lightning, not to mention broken glass everywhere. There might have even been a hole or two in the walls.

“Have you ever seen something so beautiful?” His vision is slightly blurry, words slurred. Ridley’s glowing from the inside, the sparks erupting from the tips of his fingers and fizzing through the air around him. However, he’s not talking about himself for once in his life. His gaze is fixed on the fireworks in the distance. This building had a good view, where he was or how he got here was a mystery for the time being but that would be a problem he would solve later.