choi san. your hopelessly obsessed boyfriend. you ask one innocent question about what he does when youβre not around and immediately regret it .. or do you?
a/n : hi guys! after almost a year away, i figured my comeback should be the successor to my fic 'keep talking'. thank you for 800+ followers. i love yall
Youβre wrapped around your boyfriend like a koala, half in his lap, half sprawled across his chest when the thought suddenly hits you.
You pull back, narrow your eyes, tilt your head all suspicious:
βWaitβ¦ when Iβm not hereβ¦ do you, likeβ¦ get yourself off?β
San freezes midβback rub.
ββ¦Huh?β
βAnswer. The question.β
Your eyes squint even harder.
He sighs, looks away, rubs the bridge of his nose.
βBaby, why would you ask me something likeββ
βCause I wanna know!β
He stares at you⦠then gives up.
βI watch our tapes.β
βHuh?β
βOur sex tapes.β
βSanββ
βAnd I look at your Instagram pictures.β
βSan.β
βAnd sometimes I screenshot your bikini photos before you delete them.β
βSan???β
βAnd sometimes I use the ones where youβre adjusting your top because you always look flustered andββ
βStopββ
He keeps going, dead serious, like heβs reading a grocery list:
βAnd that one video where youβre laughing and your boobs bounce a little? Yeah. That one goes crazy. Top-tier.β
βWhat????β
βAnd those mirror selfies where your hair is messy. And the ones where youβre not even trying. Those are the worst.β
He shifts under you, already getting hard just thinking about it.
You smack his chest.
βYouβre SICK.β
He shrugs.
βIβm in love.β
You slap him harder.
βYouβre DEPRAVED.β
Another shrug.
βYouβre SEXY.β
You bury your face in your hands, dying.
He gently pulls them away, lowering his voice:
βYou asked, baby. You really think I jerk off to random women? No. Everything I do, I do to you.β
He leans in, kissing your cheek, jaw, neck.
βAnd if you wantβ¦ I can show you exactly how I do it.β
You slide off his lap just a little, sitting between his knees, eyes wide and way too curious for his sanity.
ββ¦Show me, then.β
San blinks once. Twice.
His Adamβs apple jumps.
ββ¦Yeah?β he asks, voice already dropping into that low, dangerous tone.
You nod.
He drags a hand down his face like he knows heβs about to ruin you with this demonstration alone.
βOkay,β he mutters, leaning back into the couch, legs spreading a little, βbut donβtβ donβt laugh. Iβm serious.β
You bite your lip.
He sees it. He groans.
Then he slips a hand under the waistband of his sweats, pulls himself out, already half-hard from the conversation alone. His breaths get shaky, on purpose, because he knows youβre watching.
βNormallyβ¦β he starts, eyes flicking to yours, ββ¦I start slow. Justβ thinking about you walking around the house, tiny little outfit, pretending youβre not teasing me.β
His thumb glides over the tip spreading the precum, β and he sighs, deep, breathy, borderline whimpering.
You swallow so hard he hears it.
βAnd then,β he continues, pumping slowly, βI think about how you look when you ride meβ¦ all loud and needyβ¦β
You shift on your knees.
He definitely notices.
His lashes flutter, and he lets out a soft, broken βmmhβfuckβ¦β
You scoot closer.
He moans again, high, pretty, shameless, because heβs absolutely doing this on purpose now.
βYou like watching me, baby?β he breathes out, jaw clenching, hips lifting into his own hand. βYeahβ¦ you doβ¦β
You nod, dazed.
He groans, throwing his head back for a second, biting his lip dramatically, exaggerating it because he knows it gets you.
Then he looks at you through heavy lids.
βYou always make me this hard,β he whispers, voice cracking just a little. βEven when youβre not here.β
Your thighs press together.
He smirks, then lets out another deliberate whimper, soft and choked, like he knows it shoots straight into your bloodstream.
βCome here,β he murmurs, hand stroking himself faster. βIf youβre gonna watchβ¦ watch up close.β
You crawl into his lap.
He pulls your hand to his stomachβ
so warm, tense, shaking, and keeps moaning softly, messy and pretty, just for you.
Heβs doing all of this on purpose.
You lean in so close he can feel your breath on his throat, eyes glued to every movement of his hand, every twitch of his stomach, every shaky inhale he lets slip.
And San loses his mind over it.
βJesusβ¦β he whispers, voice cracking when he looks down and sees your faceβeyes blown wide, lips parted, studying him like heβs something you want to taste. βYouβre really watching me like thisβ¦?β
You nod slowly. His chest stutters.
He bites his lip so hard a muscle in his jaw jumps.
βThatβsβ fuckβ this is the hottest thing youβve ever done,β he mutters, voice warm and breathless. He spreads his legs wider, giving you a better view, pumping his hand a little harderβ¦ slowerβ¦ letting you see everything. βYouβre looking at me like you wanna eat me alive.β
βSan,β you breathe.
His eyes darken instantly.
βOh my godβ¦β he laughs under his breath, ruined already, βyouβre obsessed with me.β
Your face heats.
He cups your chin with his free hand, forcing you to hold eye contact while the other keeps stroking, wet and filthy and slow enough to make your stomach twist.
βYou like how I do it?β he whispers.
You nod. His smile is evil.
βYou like seeing what I do when youβre not home?β
Another nod.
His grip tightens. His thighs flex under you.
βYβknow what I think about?β he murmurs, leaning closer until your noses almost touch. βYou. On your knees. Mouth open. Eyes like that. Waiting for me.β
Your breath catches.
He groans.Β
βKeep watching,β he says, voice low and trembly. βDonβt look away. Not once.β
You donβt.
Your eyes track the movement of his hand, the veins on his forearm, the way his stomach tightens every time he pumps upward. He notices. He feels your stare. It makes him moan againβsoft, involuntary, almost shy.
You whisper, barely audible:
ββ¦You look so hot.β
He chokes on a breath. His hips jerk.
And his voice drops even lower, wrecked and proud and starving:
βSay that again.β
You whisper it again, slower. βSo fucking hot.β
You slide closerβslow, curious, innocent in that way that makes his whole body seize upβand tilt your head.
βCan I helpβ¦?β
His hand falters on himself, eyes snapping to yours like you just offered him the cure to every problem heβs ever had.
ββ¦yeah,β he whispers, voice already breaking, βyeahβbaby, cβmere.β
Your smaller hand slips under his, replaces his stroke.
The second your skin touches him he whimpersβa real one, sharp and desperate, right against your neck.
βOhβfuckββ
His head drops to your shoulder.
Heβs trembling.
He grabs your wrist gently, guiding your rhythm, but youβre already doing it exactly how he likesβsoft at the base, tight at the top, twisting up just a littleβ
βBaby,β he gasps, breath hitting your collarbone, βyouβreβfuckβyouβre so good at thisββ
His hips buck into your palm.
His hand is gripping your thigh, hard enough to bruise.
You look up at him through your lashes and his knees actually shake.
βThatβs it,β you whisper, teasing, βyou like when I do it?β
He moans.
A pretty, broken, breathy sound right into your ear.
βI loveβwhen youβhelp meβgodβfuuuckβ
Heβs collapsing, chest heaving, face flushed, thighs tense beneath you.
The wet slick sound of your hand working him faster fills the room and he completely loses the last bit of control he had.
βY/Nβbabyβoh my god Iβm gonna cumββ
You tighten your grip, stroke him exactly how he likesβ
His whole body jerksβ
He lets out the most ruined groan youβve ever heardβ
And he finishes right into your hand, warm and messy and so much more than you expected.
He collapses into you, panting into your shoulder, completely melted.
Your sticky hand is still resting on him when he finally breathes again.
ββ¦youβre gonna kill me,β he whispers, voice wrecked, trembling all over. βYouβre actually gonna kill me.β
You hold your hand upβ dripping.Absolutely covered in him. A warm, glossy mess.
Your eyes go wide on purpose.
ββ¦San.β
He looks up from your shoulder, dazed, hair a mess, breaths still shaking.
And you wiggle your fingers.
βLook at this! You're. SO. Desperate.β
His whole face flushes scarlet.
βBabyββ he groans, grabbing your wrist to hide the evidence, βdonβtβ¦ donβt say it like thatβ¦β
But you lean back, smirking like the menace you are.
βYou made a huge mess. This isβSan, this is ridiculous. You couldnβt even hold it for a second??β
He hides his face in your neck, mortified, whining like a grown man being scolded.
βYou canβt tease me after what you just did to me,β he mumbles, voice muffled against your skin, βI warned youβI told you I was closeβyou kept goingβbaby, you know what you were doingββ
βNo,β you say, faking innocence, showing your sticky palm again, βyouβre nasty. Nasty. Look at this.β
He pulls your wrist down, panicked.
βStop showing it to me!β
His voice cracks. βI know what I did!β
You laugh so hard he swats your thigh lightly, embarrassed, still breathless.
Then he looks up at youβeyes heavy, lips parted, totally ruinedβand mutters:
ββ¦clean your hand before you start teasing me again or I swear Iβll make an even bigger mess.β
OH.
You grab a warm towel and clean him up gently, slow little wipes that make him flinch because heβs still sensitive.
You purposely kiss the tip softly just to watch him jolt.
βY/Nβ!β
You kiss it again..
He slaps a hand over his face.
βStopβ¦ youβre gonna kill meβ¦β
You hop off the bed, still glowing, still smug, and go to the mirror.
You clean yourself up tooβwiping your mouth, fixing your hairβ
But then curiosity hits.
You look at your fingers.
You look at him in the reflection.
You drag your tongue over them.
Slow.
Purposeful.
Sanβs jaw drops.
ββ¦that tastes kinda good.
Somebody changed their diet. Good boy.β
His ears turn red.
βWhy would you DO that?!β
You shrug in the mirror, wiping your lips.
βI was curious.β
βThatβs notβ you canβt justβ youββ
Heβs literally malfunctioning.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
β Live Streamingβ Interactive Chatβ Private Showsβ HD Qualityβ Free Actions
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
for mature audiences only, minors will be stockaded in the town square
β’ a/n: the long awaited... | this is NOT in any way, shape, or form meant to depict who / how any of ateez are irl. please do not take this fic as fact on their personalities, please and thank you.
β’ summary: everyone knows choi san. the choi san. and the pornstar wonder boy just invited you to do a collab with him
β’ word count: 35.7k
β’ warnings: MINORS RUN FOR THE HILLS | masturbation (f), oral (m,f), p->v, unprotected sex (don't do that), squirting, edging, dirty talk, san makes a Crazy first impression, cowgirl/riding, bondage (f, not reader), slight yeosang x reader (mentioned), porn industry, blowjob, fingering, basically just everything youβd find in a porn
You love that you can wake up whenever you want, and that you have no set schedule to live by. The only deadlines you have to worry about are the ones you make for yourself. You love your beautiful apartment that you didnβt need anyone elseβs help to get, and that it is so close to everything in the city. You love not worrying about money anymore. You get to live however you deem fit, taking life one day at a time. Everything in your life is by your own design. Honestly? Itβs a dream.Β
And itβs easy money, giving men a fantasy for the night.Β
Thatβs what you sell, the idea of you. In everyday life, you donβt pout nearly as much as you do on camera, nor do you talk as sweetly to strangers. Some of them, though, arenβt strangers to you anymore. You recognize their usernames and their donations, especially the ones who have been fans of yours since you started, and the ones who pay for your highest tiered subscription. Twenty-five dollars a month just to jerk off to your exclusive content. Ah, men.Β
Your fanbase has grown and grown, skyrocketing somewhat recently when you convinced Yeosang, your hot guy friend, to join you in one of your videos. Heβd worn a face mask to protect his identity, but it had been so obvious that heβs attractive even with it on. The black tank top left little to the imagination as your audience watched the muscles in his arms flex as his strong hands fingered you over and over again while he talked you through each orgasm. It was a rather simple video, with no actual sex. Regardless, that became one of your most viewed videos even though it was an exclusive, and the video that ended up paying for this apartment. Men and women alike scrambled to type in their credit card information to see it, boosting not only your ego, but your bank account as well. You gave Yeosang a decent sized chunk of your earnings, seeing as he was in the video too.Β Β
His whole face had turned red when you showed him the number of views, hiding behind his hands for good measure. Heβs always been shy, it was a damn miracle you even got him to do it in the first place.Β
Since then, youβve been living quite comfortably. Yeosang, too. Despite your efforts to convince him to create his own account for people to subscribe to, heβs maintained his βinnocenceβ. However, recently heβs been asking you more and more about the details and dynamics of running an account like yours. Youβre almost afraid to jinx it, like if you ask him outright if heβs thinking about it, heβll forget the whole thing and never do it. Who are you to potentially accidentally deny the general paying population of your hot friend?Β
He may become even more popular than me, you think to yourself, a small smile tugging at the corners of your mouth.Β
You glance at your laptop, its camera trained at a specific angle towards your empty bed, and you peek at how many people are waiting for your livestream to start. Friday nights are always good to pull in larger crowds, and tonight is no different.Β
Nine hundred, and climbing.Β
Whoa.
You let out a low whistle at the number, the highest youβve ever seen it just for the amount of people waiting. Youβre not even due to start for another ten minutes. The number shifts around a couple times, losing some, and gaining more every minute. For the first time in a while, you start to feel a little self-conscious. This newfound fame is still just that: new. Even though you canβt see the audience youβve gathered, you still feel that there are nine hundred pairs of eyes on you in your bedroom. Thereβs a nervous flutter in your chest that you canβt seem to shake off in the dwindling minutes before your stream begins.Β
With only two minutes left, you flit around your room, double checking how you look in your mirror, fixing your hair and makeup, and adjusting one of the straps to the lingerie you picked out for the evening. You sit prettily on the bed, taking a few moments before you start to center yourself, taking deep breaths and focusing on getting your head clear for tonightβs performance.Β
A βperformanceβ is basically all it is.Β Β Β
Your fingers hover over the trackpad of your laptop, counting down the seconds until there are none left, and you click βGo Liveβ.Β
As usual, you allow about ten seconds to go by, waiting for more to join once they get the notification that the stream has started. You read the sudden influx of chat, smiling when you see familiar usernames and knowing that rent will be covered for the next couple of months, just by their presence here. If you wanted something, all you had to do was ask for it. Someone in the chat will gladly donate however much you need β and then some β just for the chance to hear you read their username and thank them in your sweet voice.Β
So easy.Β Β
You saturate your greeting with honey, looking up into the laptop camera, eyes round and innocent.Β
βHi, everyone,β you sing, giggling for all of the people vying for your attention. Each comment is sent with the hope that youβll read it out. Some send tips already, small amounts mostly in the single digits, but there are a couple of doubles sent your way already. The tip counter in the upper corner of the screen increases steadily with each donation as they come. Compliments, questions, requests, and general niceties move up the screen in a constant staccato, making room for the next.Β
You lean back on your hands, pretending that you donβt know what youβre doing with this angle. The camera is angled down, providing an almost perfect POV shot for the audience. The fantasy begins immediately. You uncross your legs, feigning shyness.Β
βMy day was okay, thank you,β you purr, knowing you just made someone nearly cream their pants by answering their question. βButβ¦ Iβve just been so lonely.βΒ
You pout, right on cue to accompany your words. Instantly, the comment section floods with volunteers to cure you of your loneliness. Each one promises they can fix it, that theyβll be there for you, that theyβll never leave. Itβs flattering, but none of them really mean it. Maybe they think they do, but again none of them really know you. You doubt most of them want to get to the very root of you and figure you out. No, most if not all just want to get into your pants to say that they have. Bragging rights.Β
[user75846] will yeo be joining you?
You read the comment aloud, shaking your head in quiet defeat. βNo, itβs just me tonight.βΒ
Some comments beg for his return, others are happy that itβs just you β the jealous types β and the rest are simply impatient to see your body. Your hand trails across the hem of your flimsy, sheer tank top you chose to wear for the evening. It leaves little to the imagination. The quiet pinging of more money being donated motivates you further. You sigh, looking up into the camera again.Β
βIβve been so sad and lonely all dayβ¦ you guys will help me, right?βΒ
You pull your shirt down just a little more, showcasing your cleavage while keeping your face as innocent as possible. The comments spike again, but you donβt pay attention to them anymore. Your hand travels farther up to your mouth, fingers threatening to slip between your glossy lips. Twelve hundred people watch and wait. You hum, parting your lips slightly but not quite giving them the visual they want. Not yet. Thereβs no rush β not for you, at least. But one comment catches your eye because of its impatience.Β Β Β
[mntn3000]: start.
Very blunt. You donβt recognize the username as one of your regulars or subscribers. Whoever this is must be new. Youβve run and maintained a rather strict program with your subscribers when it comes to what they say in the live chat β politeness being one of the main rules. The lack of a βpleaseβ to sweeten the demand nearly twists your face into something less angelic. Maybe whoever this user is is already close, unable to finish his sentence before he finishes himself. You bet once you take your shirt off heβll blow his load and leave. It happens. For now, youβll have fun with him. Teach this newcomer some manners.Β
You dip your fingers in, tongue peeking out to greet them into your mouth. The amount of comments slows just a little, silently telling you that some of your viewers are beginning to work themselves up along with you.Β
βOh dearβ¦ βmntn3000β just said βstartβ. No βpleaseβ? Will someone let him know how this works?β You keep your voice sugary, making sure everyone knows you arenβt hurt or being stuck-up, but that youβre rather amused at the comment.Β
Almost immediately, upon request, you see one of your regulars tag the newcomer in a message explaining the chat rules.Β
βThank you, Woo,β you hum, lifting your shirt up even more, just for him, to show your gratitude. Your hand lingers near your breast, a small shudder running through your body as you graze your nipple.Β
βWooβ, your nickname for him from his username, has become somewhat of an anonymous friend to you. Heβs subscribed to your highest level tier and the VIP extras that you offer, including private shows and a group chat on Discord. Heβs always the first to step in if someone says something out of line or disrespectful in any way. Your own personal guard dog.Β
Whoever he is, βmntn3000β doesnβt say anything to Wooβs message.Β
Fourteen hundred people now.Β
You hum again, resisting the urge to squeeze your thighs together. You love the attention. And after doing a rough estimate in your head how much money youβll make tonight, it just makes you want to put on an even better show.Β
βIf you want somethingβ¦β you purr, taking your shirt off completely. The comments erupt. βAsk nicely~β you tease, giggling to yourself.
A donation pops up immediately, the sum of which nearly makes you gape.Β Β Β
[mntn3000] has donated $500Β
Wellβ¦ thatβs certainly nice.Β
[mntn3000]: start, kitten
Thatβll do it.Β
Youβre quick to control your reaction to the generous donation. However, now you canβt help but feel like youβre performing under pressure. Some of your other patrons comment on it, but youβre on autopilot now.Β
One more deep breath in and your tight little shorts soon join your shirt on the floor.Β
You exhale audibly, turning the breath into a quiet moan as your hand continues to explore your own body. This time, you donβt tease when your fingers come back up to your mouth, accepting them immediately. Your free hand finds its way to your neglected chest, kneading the warm skin. Itβs easy to pretend that the touch belongs to someone elseβs manipulation.Β
Itβs more than just a little confusing for you to immediately imagine itβs Yeosang, if not friendship-wise. The two of you have mutually agreed that youβre platonic. The collaboration was justβ¦ a friend helping a friend. Moreso than the views and money you earned from it, youβre thankful that there is no awkwardness between you two in the aftermath of it. When you had switched the camera off, he had even joked about graduating to another level of friendship, or something like that. You canβt remember exactly right now, youβre a bit preoccupied.Β
You pry your eyes open to read the chat, wanting to know if theyβre enjoying the view so far.Β
[user92834]: i keep expecting yeo to show up γ γ Β i miss him
You whine, only able to nod once or twice. βI miss Yeo, too.βΒ
Now youβre playing with fire. Multiple people in the chat remind you of their personal favorite parts of that video, giving you a much needed visual to get yourself off. Is it wrong? To use memories of your best friend βplatonicallyβ overstimulating you for the better part of an hour? Maybe. You think you just need to get laid soon. Admittedly, itβs been rather long since you have been. Longer than most of your viewers will ever believe.Β Β
βI wish someone was here to help me,β you blink slowly into the camera, pouting again.Β
Your artificial patheticness is like a siren call to these men. It seems that every single one of your viewers suddenly comes alive, flooding the chat and your donations box all at once, each claiming that they should be the one to help you next time. That they have what it takes.Β
Except one.Β
You havenβt seen that βmntn3000β guyβs username pop up since he sent the generous donation earlier. You wonder if heβs still watching. Maybe heβs embarrassed from earlier.Β
Whatever. Heβs more likely just another background viewer. You probably wonβt hear from him again.Β
Pushing the thought away, you start to finally trail your hand down your stomach to lightly circle your clit. Your hooded eyes flicker up to the screen, making sure everythingβs in view. Satisfied with what you see, you resume touching yourself, continuing to loudly suck on your fingers for good measure.Β
[user82392] has donated $5
[user01743] has donated $20
[puppyu.u] has donated $50
[mars9843] has donated $50Β
[puppyu.u] has donated $100
You canβt help but smile, watching the silent competition between your viewers. Every time someone ups the amount theyβre willing to drop on you, thereβs dozens more who are willing to match it. You feel like youβre at auction. Who will win in the end? Usually, itβs one of your regulars, the ones with access to the private Discord, who come out on top. Youβre betting on βpuppyu.uβ tonight. He seems like he has something to prove.Β
No oneβs quite willing to match βmntn3000ββs five hundred dollar starting offer just yet.Β
You get the feeling that everyone who regularly competes here silently agrees to justβ¦ ignore it. Everyone here spoils you, of course. But dropping five hundred dollars straight out the gate is a blatant power move that seems intent to undermine most of the others in here in one fell swoop.Β
But heβs quiet now. Maybe he spent all he had in one go. It happens sometimes. Rarely, but sometimes.Β
Youβre not sure why youβre so hung up on this random user. Youβre not used to being caught off guard like this. Closing your eyes so no one can see you roll them, you decide to not think about him anymore.Β
And you have just the thing for it.Β
While they spend money to achieve imagined dominance over the others in the chat, you reach just offscreen to grab your favorite dildo. Itβs a fan-favorite as well. You scoot a little farther back on the bed, finally taking your fingers out of your mouth and replacing it with the head of the dildo. You sigh around it, like youβre content, grateful to have something in your mouth again. In reality, this is just so that it goes inside of you easier.Β Β Β
This time, you donβt make them wait.Β
The blunt head of the toy slips inside easily, and you fight to keep your head up so everyone can see your reaction to it. Halfway in, you give up. Head back, a visible shudder runs through your body that has the donation notifications ringing like crazy. Around this point in your little show, youβll pay less and less attention to the chat, only focusing on the pleasure youβre creating for yourself.Β
But this time, somethingβs off.Β
No matter what you do, you canβt seem to find that specific angle that makes you cum. Not even playing with your clit seems to be any help. You try to relax, to see if maybe youβre too tense to feel anything, but itβs quite hard to relax when youβre this frustrated already. Youβre not about to let the audience know that, but itβs discouraging. You donβt like to lie, but again, itβs all part of a performance. A fake, tailored show to sell a fantasy version of you. The one who always comes for whoever is watching, the one who is just so insatiable for each individual person watching.Β Β
At one point, you obtain false hope. You hit an angle that nearly does it for you, getting you closer than you were before to that sweet edge. Itβs so close you can almost taste it, quickening your pulse and electrifying every vein in your body. Thereβs an ache in your wrist that is starting to become strained and uncomfortable, and your eyebrows furrow together to try and maybe will an orgasm into existence. And yet the payoff evades you completely.Β Β
You make a sharp, high-pitched noise out of frustration, which hopefully comes across as ecstacy instead. Youβre not even enjoying it anymore, and your hand begins to slow down the pumps of the dildo as your fake moans increase again. Thereβs a trick you know to make your legs look like theyβre realistically shaking from an orgasm β learned by ego-boosting one too many failed relationships and one night stands in the past β and you use it now.Β
Ugh.Β
The toy slips out of you, and you blearily toss it next to you on the bed. You let the audience watch the slowing rise and fall of your chest as your breaths even out.Β
What the fuck was that? You think to yourself, tilting your head back to hide your look of confusion. Youβre kind of nervous to look at what people are saying in the chat, worried that they somehow caught onto the fact that you faked it. Without any proof, you conjure up images of cancellation, accusations, name-calling, every possible and yet unrealistic bad thing that could potentially happen.Β
Steeling yourself as best you can, you straighten and take a look at the chat.Β
All worries melt away at once as soon as you notice the heart emojis that flood the comment section. Youβre not sure when this started, nor do you know who began the trend, but it has turned into something similar to applause at the end of a stream. A cute signal that they enjoyed the show. You smile at the screen, even laughing a little from relief. Time and time again, youβre proven to be loved no matter what.Β
There are a few more donations, although theyβve slowed down now that youβre done. You push your hair back, taking the time to slowly breathe in and out as you read the comments. Most of them tell you how hard you made them bust, which earns you a few more dollars. Still, thereβs one username youβre stuck on that youβre not seeing. Not yet. You hope youβre not being obvious, waiting for it to reappear. Maybe with some manners and patience this time. Your eyes stay locked on the corner of the screen.
Itβs after you blow a puff of air up towards your hair to move it out of your face that he reappears. Maybe your impatience was received loud and clear to him.Β
He only sends one word. Four letters.Β
[mntn3000]: cuteΒ
[mntn3000] has donated $1000
[mntn3000] has left the stream
Huh. Your spinning head almost registers that. A good thing about streaming is that youβre not exactly on a time limit. You can take as much time as you need to to calm down and regroup before addressing your audience again. Most will leave during this time, and thatβs alright too. Your devoted viewers will stay, still seeking out your attention, praise, and appreciation. You always thank them for watching and of course, donating.Β
βThereβs thousands of others you could have spent your time with tonight, so thank you for choosing me. I hope I made it worth it.βΒ
In the middle of catching your breath, you manage a small grin into the camera. With a whispered, βgoodnightβ, and a kiss blown straight to your audience, you end the live and flop backwards on your bed. Another job well done. Another year of rent earned.Β
You force yourself to move after five minutes, showering, changing into new, comfier clothes and taking your makeup off in the bathroom until itβs just you in the mirror, and not the character. Itβs not until youβre brushing your teeth that you realize how tired you are from that live, nearly drifting off with the toothbrush still in your mouth. Head about to hit the wall, you jerk back to stand upright and finish up quickly. You can practically hear your bed calling your name.Β Β Β
A text from Yeosang lights up your phone, halfway buried underneath a pillow. You pull it out and stand by your bed to read it.Β
[yeoyeoπ»]: another successful day at the office?
You canβt help but grin, burying yourself under the covers and texting him back quickly.Β
[y/nπΈ]: another small fortune π₯±
[yeoyeoπ»]: still wanna hang out tomorrow?
[yeoyeoπ»]: or is the princess too tiredΒ
[y/nπΈ]: stfu π
[y/nπΈ]: yes pls i miss you :(Β
[yeoyeoπ»]: fine fineΒ
[yeoyeoπ»]: iβll be over at noonΒ
[yeoyeoπ»]: you better be awake -.-Β
[y/nπΈ]: goodnight pretty boy!
[yeoyeoπ»]: ππ»
[yeoyeoπ»]: goodnightΒ
Exiting the messages app, you reach over to the nightstand and grab your laptop from its perch, keen on transferring your earnings into your bank account as soon as possible. Luckily, the site you use makes it rather easy, just a click of a button, but this time around, you take a second to look at the number in the corner.Β
$14,601.Β
You whistle lowly at the sight of it. Nearly fifteen thousand dollars for thirty minutes of βworkβ. If you spend and save wisely, youβll never have to set foot in an office for as long as you live.Β
Laptop set aside for the time being, you make a mental note to try and fit in some pilates tomorrow morning before Yeosang comes over. There are certain things you try to do to maintain your beauty and health, especially if the rewards look like this number. The sore muscles, cutting off sugar, and time spent trying to match your wing eyeliner are worth it. Almostβ¦ you do miss sugar quite a bit and are prone to cheat if tempted.Β Β
You quickly do the math in the calculator app to see how exponentially your bank account is about to grow once the transfer is complete. The total makes you smile ear to ear. Already, youβre thinking of more ideas, ways to keep everyone interestedβ¦ but alsoβ¦ maybe a vacation. A first class flight to anywhere in the world seems more than desirable. Maybe tomorrow youβll ask Yeosang if heβd like to come too. The thought excites you, making you want to stay up and look at potential destinations.Β
Closing out of the calculator and banking apps, youβre just about to go on TikTok to look through your βdream vacayβ folder, when a notification directs your eyes upward. Itβs from your email, but it's no promotional message from one of the many stores you shop at, nor is it spam.Β
The sender is simply βH.J Kimβ, accompanied by three words in the subject line: βExclusive Collaboration Offerβ.Β
That certainly piques your interest, although it could just be a scam. Since you donβt have an agent, youβve learned the hard way how to filter out those who just wish to take your hard-earned β wellβ¦ earned β money away from you. When you were just starting out, you had to change numerous passwords more than once. Youβre on a first-name-basis with your bank. Usually, you ignore emails like this, but something draws you to it. In what you can see of the preview, the sender doesnβt use more words than he has to, and the word choice seems rather official. Not as scammy as youβre used to.Β
Hesitant, but intrigued at what this offer could possibly entail, you click on it to see what the rest of the email says.
__________________________
Dear Miss Y/N,Β
I hope you are doing well. My name is Kim Hongjoong and I am a Talent Agent with Afterdark Productions, representing Choi San. We have been admiring your work for a while now, and would love to extend an offer for a collaboration between the two of you.Β
If accepted, I will be more than happy to disclose more information regarding the details of the shoot as well as beginning the process of arranging transportation and accommodation. Please feel free to reach out with any questions or concerns, and I will respond as quickly as I can.Β
Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to the possibility of working together.Β
Just his name makes your thighs clench together under the plush comforter.
You make a noise somewhere between an exhalation and a laugh of disbelief. You reread it a couple more times, making sure youβre reading it correctly. Thereβs simply no way someone like Choi San knows you exist, and if he does, then how? Sure, youβre gaining popularity on cam platforms, but you didnβt think the industry on the other side of the coin would take notice. Maybe youβve just been naive. Itβs essentially the same thing but without a script or team involved. You do everything yourself β the lights, the camera, the action. The idea of even attempting what βAfterdarkβ is known for is quite daunting. The thought of potentially meeting San even more so.Β
Everyone knows Choi San.Β
Somewhat of a respected micro-celebrity, he is currently revolutionizing the stigma around adult videos and being an adult actor. Breaking stereotypes, barriers, and backs. Impressive. It also helps that he has adonis-like features and a smile that can universally melt hearts. Very helpful, indeed.Β
Itβs still not fully clicking that youβve been offered a chance to work with him. Not yet. Most likely, itβll hit you in the morning when you check your phone for the millionth time, making sure you didnβt just dream this all up in a post-orgasmic haze. Each time you reread it, the words stay the same. The name jumps out at you.Β
βFuckinβ hellβ¦β you whisper, pressing your palm to your mouth, reading the email over just one more time. Thatβs what you tell yourself anyway.Β
A collaborationβ¦ you assume that means on his turf. On his side of the industry, anyway. Your mouth dries. Are you even up for this?Β
A visual learner all your life, you find yourself opening a private browser and looking up a porn site you know has posted a couple of Sanβs videos. For research. Literally. Your thought process is to refresh your memory, imagine yourself in the actressβ place and discern whether or not you think you can handle what this offer entails. You pick the very first result after you enter his name in the search box, and settle back against your pillows, nervously biting your nails as the video begins.Β
It starts off like many others of its kind, a flashy montage of whatβs to come β pun unfortunately intended β to entice viewers to keep watching. You skip ahead, like many do, not caring for whatever βplotβ has been thrown together to justify why these two hot people are sleeping together this time. Although, from the clips you do see as the video jumps ahead, inching closer to the real action, you have to admit heβs a decent actor. You stop skipping through it towards the end of their conversation, landing at the proposition and steadily rising scripted passion.Β
San steps closer to the actress, really getting into her space, and holding eye contact the whole time. The type that would make any girl melt. Itβs not fiery or intimidating, no, itβs something much worse.Β
Desire.Β
He mumbles something under his breath that you donβt catch, too focused on how his hands wrap around her waist, pulling her in closer. What startles you is howβ¦ almost vulnerable he looks. Attentive. His head tilted down slightly, looking at her through his eyelashes, enchanting her so effortlessly as his hands gently wander. You cross an arm over your chest, eyes still fixated on the phone screen. Youβre getting affected this much just watching him look at her like that? How the hell will you possibly be able to handle it in real life? The short answer is: you probably wonβt.Β
Because the next time you skip, impatience gnawing at you to just see and know what he does, youβre thrown right into the fray.Β
The camera is almost cinematic, capturing precise angles where everything can be seen, the lighting low and sensual. Theyβre on a large bed, and San has taken the time to place one of the pillows under her head as well as her hips. A blindfold covers the actressβ eyes, but you can tell right away sheβs been steadily crying through the fabric. Her hands tighten in his hair, his mouth latches onto one of her breasts, and his hand between her legs where quiet, constant, wet sounds are being drawn from. Still, he looks earnest. Genuine. Like he cares about her pleasure, and wants to make sure sheβs getting just as much out of this experience as he will. At this point, youβre sure the script is thrown out the window, because the way he talks to her, so soft and sincere, praising her closer and closer to the edge, is something that no scriptwriter could come up with. No, this was pure San.Β
When sheβs close, she tells him immediately and he changes nothing. He whispers the same praises, keeps his hand at the same pace and angle, reaching deep and curling up over and over, coaxing her body to release. The automated subtitles are no help, so you turn the volume up just a bit more, so you can hear him clearly. He mustβve been edging her because she starts begging him, trying to not pull his hair out at the roots. He simply covers her mouth with a free hand and leans over her, giving her permission to let go for him.Β
She shudders violently, thighs pressing into the sides of his body to prevent him from moving. He's not going anywhere, though. That infamous dimpled smile appears as he watches her come undone beneath him.Β
Your thighs clench. Thatβd be you.Β
His voice drifts languidly from your laptop speakers, melting your brain even further. βYes, baby, thatβs it. There you goβ¦ such a good girl.βΒ
A girlish squeal gets stuck in your throat and you press your lips together to ensure you donβt let it out. You havenβt even said yes yet. There could be conditions you donβt agree with, payment arguments. He could be an asshole for all you know. Or this could all be a very elaborate and convincing scam.Β
Still, just in case it is real, and for the sake of βresearchβ, you keep watching.Β
He kisses her chest, slowly making his way up her throat, her jaw, until he reaches her lips. He takes his sweet time, like he knows no one would dare look away. She sighs into his mouth, quiet whimpers leaving her every so often while he gently rubs her clit, just enough to keep her stimulated as she gets used to the feeling of being empty once again. You wonder what itβs like to kiss him. Your hands itch to reach for your phone and text Yeosang to tell him everything, however, youβre rather busy holding them still at the moment.Β Β
You appreciate how he doesnβt move onto the next thing immediately. Too many times have you seen other actors in his industry not giving their partner a bit of a breather after such an intense orgasm. Granted, some may like that, the overwhelming and constant stimulation, but the way San allows her to take her time, silently encourages her to follow the deeper rhythm of his breathing, and how he holds her hand and places slow, soft kisses all over her body, it all adds up to make you crave a slower pace. An intimate interaction like this.Β
San checks in with her quietly, and with a nod from her and another peck on the lips, heβs positioning himself between her legs. Stars in her eyes, she reaches down and strokes his length, whimpering softly. He gently brushes her hair back, admiring the look of nervous anticipation on her face. When he finally pushes inside, the two of them moan at the same time. Buried the way in, he smiles down at her before kissing her deeply. All dimples. A broken moan of his name tumbles from her lips, and youβre almost sure she didnβt realize she even said anything. Sheβs staring up at him like heβs a deity. Like heβs come down from heaven just for her. And sheβs not acting.Β
One thing you know for sure: youβd be stupid to decline the offer.Β
You consider your mind made up.Β
Reluctantly exiting the video, saving it for later, you reopen your email app. Part of you wonders whether or not two in the morning is an appropriate time to email someone, but another part of you simply doesnβt care. Itβll be in Mr. Kim Hongjoongβs inbox first thing when he wakes up tomorrow. Your reply is enthusiastic yet professional, expressing appreciation for the offer in the first place. You thank him and San for taking notice of you and offer praise of his work as well. Wrapping up with the same politeness the original sender used, you sign off with your name. Your fingers hover over the keyboard for a minute before adding a kiss emoji to the side of your name. Before you can second guess that choice, you send it off.Β
Needing to expel some of these nerves, you get up out of bed to scavenge your fridge for a well-past-midnight snack. Maybe yogurt or something. Standing in the white light of the fridge, you realize food may not be the best choice. Nothing jumps out at you to want at two oβclock in the morning, stomach already doing flips and tricks as it is. You settle on a mini carton of strawberry milk that you may or may not finish and walk back to bed a little too fast. Quicker than your usual leisurely pace.Β
You glance at your phone, laying face down on your bed like what you just watched on it made it shy. You want to text Yeosang so badly, to get his take on all of this, but you should let him sleep. Just because your sleep schedule is fucked doesnβt mean you have to ruin his as well. Your fingers absentmindedly tap the carton, only two sips deep in your drink. Hm.Β
Youβre just starting to flirt with the idea of calling Yeosang anyway when you get a notification that effectively snaps you out of your thought spiral. Whoever or whatever it is has just unknowingly saved Yeosangβs REM cycle.Β
Not expecting a response so soon, your eyes widen a bit when you see that youβve gotten a response back already. The quickness makes you a little wary. Scams usually are quick to respond back too.Β
Or, this βHongjoongβ guy may have a sleep schedule quite like yours. After all, you responded rather quickly to his first email.Β
__________________________
Hi Miss Y/N,Β
Thank you for getting back to me so quickly. We are thrilled to hear that you are accepting the offer.Β
The next steps in moving forward are rather simple. I will ask you to fill out a form β which I have linked to this e-mail β and send that at your earliest convenience. It is your basic questionnaire, really, and a chance for us to get to know you as well as your preferences for the shoot and scene.Β
Β After you have sent that and we go over it, I would like to meet with you β either in person or through video call β for both our safety and to finalize all arrangements. If you choose to meet in person, I will gladly bring along a female member of my team in an effort to make you feel more comfortable and safe.Β Β
As always, please feel free to reach out if you have any questions, comments, or concerns. Looking forward to hearing from you again.Β
βWe are thrilled to hear that you are accepting the offer.βΒ
At first, you assumed he was just referencing the production company, but the specific use of it catches and holds your attention. Did Sanβ¦ ask for this collab to happen? Scrolling up to reread it again, the second line of the first e-mail you were sent strikes you: βWe have been admiring your work for a while nowβ¦β Not just the company. βWeβ as inβ¦Β
You swallow hard, setting the strawberry milk on your nightstand and shrinking back against your pillows again. Your phone burns your eyes in the dark, but you canβt stop reading this new message. Thereβs so much to unpack, even though itβs so straightforward. As of right now, in regards to meeting with Kim Hongjoong, youβre leaning towards just a video call. Youβre still not quite totally convinced this isnβt an elaborate prank of some kind. Maybe a weird fan who wants this to happen but thereβs no truth to it. But againβ¦ you donβt get that vibe. Not from how professional this seems. And a crazy fan wouldnβt offer to bring along another woman to make you feel more comfortable, heβd insist on meeting alone, under the guise of βprotecting our privacyβ.Β
And if it is realβ¦ then it is really happening. Moving forward, as the talent agent said, a collaboration in the early stages of planning. With Choi San.Β
Dammit, Yeosang, why canβt you be awake right now, you think and you huff dramatically, burying your face in your hands. Heβll certainly get an earful of all of this tomorrow afternoon. Β Β
But you decide you need to talk this through to somebody right now. Or some people.Β
Even though you just went live, youβre quick to open your Discord app, not even bothering to send a warning message to tell your exclusive members that youβre going live again. This time, just for them. You know theyβll come. They always do.Β
Once you have your laptop adjusted and headphones on, youβre ready to go. You click the microphone button and wait.Β Β
As expected, four of them join immediately. You regularly wonder how theyβre all able to drop everything to watch you, no matter what time you go live. Two others join soon after, but they rarely comment in the chat. Silent viewers with open wallets are never unwelcome here.Β
βHi guys! I have big news,β you smile into the camera, reading all the messages as they pop up.Β
[woogoesthere]: tell ussssssss!!!!!
[fix0nmi]: π?
[mars9843]: what is it cutie?
[puppyu.u]: hi baby why the secret meeting?? π
You take a minute to let them get all their guesses out, increasing their desperation to know what youβre hiding from them. Hopefully theyβll take the news well. As far as you can tell, none of them specifically come across as the parasocial jealous type, but you donβt know for certain. However, they seemed to handle your previous collab with Yeosang pretty well. That gives you some more confidence to confide in them about this.Β
βIβve been offered to do a collab with someone fromβ¦β You pause before saying the company name for dramatic effect. βAfterdark.β
Youβre a little surprised by the lack of comments right away, even worried a little. The thought of them being the parasocial jealous type crosses your mind again. Especially Woo. For a split second, you worry that you may have just angered your most loyal β and charitable β fans. The abrupt absence makes your heart plummet to your stomach.Β
It takes a full minute before anyone says anything. The longest minute of your whole life.Β
[woogoesthere]: are u telling us ur collabing w choi san?!!??!?!?! :0
Leave it to Woo to ease any worry you may have. You mask your relieved exhale under a light laugh.Β
βShould I be worried?β you half joke.Β
The immediate responses in the comments are overwhelming and collective:
[puppyu.u]: yes!!!!!!Β
[mars9843]: be afraid, be very afraidΒ
[fix0nmi]: heβs gonna wreck you lmaoΒ
[fix0nmi]: icw to watch π€ͺ
[puppyu.u]: same πππ
[mars9843]: if you could barely handle yeoβ¦β¦β¦
Your confident smile fades slightly, the corners of your mouth dropping back down as you read the multiple comments confirming what youβve been wondering.Β
[woogoesthere]: guys stop ur gonna scare her γ γ
You try to laugh it off, looking off camera to grab your strawberry milk again. The action gives your hands something to do as worry begins to settle in your chest. Of course, Woo tries to ease your growing anxieties in the chat as you lift the bottle to your lips, eyes still scanning the messagesβ¦ or rather, the warnings.Β
[puppyu.u]: well itβs trueΒ
[woogoesthere]: we should be encouraging tho >:(Β
[fix0nmi]: yeah or else she wonβt do it π
[mars9843]: β¦Β
[mars9843]: y/n weβre just kiddinggggg
[fix0nmi]: youβll be fine~! >:)Β
[woogoesthere]: -.-Β
[puppyu.u]: drink lots of water beforehand!Β
[woogoesthere]: you pervs are so annoying
βI can do it!β You try to regain your previous confidence.Β
A shroud of doubt begins to creep up over your shoulders, weighing you down. Youβre able to hide it well, but you go quiet. Quieter than usual when youβre live. You donβt like silences that last too long. Unfortunately, your sudden silence is noticeable.Β
[puppyu.u]: babyyyyyyΒ
[puppyu.u]: donβt listen to us weβre just teasingΒ
[fix0nmi]: haha sorry baby
[mars9843]: youβre gonna be great, pretty girlΒ
[fix0nmi]: canβt wait to see it ;)Β
[woogoesthere]: you ARE gonna be great
[woogoesthere]: choi san has no idea what an honor this is fr γ γ
That last message brings your smile back, tugging at the corners of your mouth until you give into it. βWooβ is right. You have to remember who the fuck you are. Choi San sought you out specifically. Thereβs no need to be nervous about anything. Itβs a different side of an industry that youβre already accustomed to, thatβs all. You just have to adapt to however it operates for one day, and if you hate it, youβll never have to do it again. And hey, youβll get to say youβve had that first and only experience with San of all people.Β
What a debut.Β
Your loyal fans must notice the confidence boost youβre experiencing because theyβre quick to praise it in the chat.Β
[fix0nmi]: there she is :)Β
[woogoesthere]: ugh ur too cuteΒ
[puppyu.u]: fr that bastard has no idea how lucky he is γ γ
[mars9843]: he better be nice to u >:(Β
βAww, you guys are so sweet,β you giggle softly, enjoying their attention and their praises. Your nerves are somewhat settled for the time being, though you canβt promise they wonβt return once you open your eyes tomorrow morning. You wonder what Yeosang will say about it.Β
Leaning back against your headboard, you exhale deeply β maybe even adding a little hint of a whine-like noise to keep them entertained. βPervsβ, as βWooβ put it, indeed. Not that you minded.Β
You hum to yourself and mention how much better theyβve made your night, and they eat it up.Β
βThank you all for your love and support. Truly.βΒ Β Β Β
You talk with them for a while longer, reciprocating their interest in you by asking them about their days and what theyβre doing tomorrow. One of the silent viewers goes offline, and you canβt say that you blame them β no one should still be awake at this hour. Youβre not sure if youβll fall asleep quickly after you log off, so maybe thatβs why you linger here and continue to talk with them. The minutes continue to go by and you start to feel guilty for keeping them all up this late. You know itβs their choice to stay and talk, but still. Odds are that at least one of them has to be up early tomorrow morning. They wonβt leave until you do.Β
βIβm gonna go to bed, guys. Thank you for staying up and chatting with me.β You smile, watching all of their usernames simultaneously start typing again.Β
[mars9843]: goodnight cutie
[fix0nmi]: night babe ;)
[woogoesthere]: aww have a good night jagi <333Β
[puppyu.u]: sweet dreams baby <3
[puppyu.u]: <3333
You giggle, noticing βpuppyu.uββs competitiveness. Before βWooβ can start a war to see how many 3βs they can add to their hearts, you quickly blow them all a kiss and end the call.Β
The silence of your apartment comes back quickly. Naturally, so do your racing thoughts. You place your laptop on your nightstand and crawl back under the covers, hoping against hope that you can smother your thoughts with your pillow.Β
Your phone vibrates against your thigh and you sneak a quick glance at it, half-expecting another e-mail, only to find a Venmo notification. Itβs from Woo. Your exclusive members have the username of your βbusinessβ Venmo account to send you money outside of cams, if they choose to. The message he attaches to the money makes you laugh: βiβm not losing to puppyu.u so easily. goodnight<333333333333βΒ
Oh, man.Β
Make that $14,751 now.Β
You wince as you notice the time in the upper lefthand corner of your phone screen. Yeosang was very clear in his text: you better be awake by noon. Knowing how late you usually sleep until, itβs not looking good. Hoping it will help, you set several alarms on your phone. Surely one of them will wake you up. You switch your phone off, refusing to check it again until tomorrow morning.Β
Without your phone to distract you though, all you do is replay that video you watched of San and that actress. The memory of it projects against your eyelids and you canβt look away. A shiver runs through you when you picture how his hands held her with such gentle strength, and the addictive moans he wasnβt afraid to let out. The same thought echoes until you finally fall asleep: thatβll be you.Β Β
Against all odds, and seven missed alarms later, you manage to wake up β albeit, exhausted β around ten oβclock. Plenty of time before Yeosang is due to come over.Β
After you eat breakfast, you decide to spend the morning researching San, watching more of his videos, listening to interviews, stalking his Instagram, anything you can find to get to know him better. Or at least, to get a better grasp on what you should expect. Hongjoong never clarified if it was going to be just you and him at this future meeting or you, him, and San. You want to be ready.Β
From what you can find, youβve come to the tentative conclusion that he appears smart, funny, well-traveled, and handsome. That last one is a given to anyone with eyes, though. It seems like he couldβve succeeded in any field of his choosing, but his candor is notoriously present and blunt whenever he gets asked why heβs gone into this profession: βI like sex. I happen to be good at it, so why not?βΒ
You get it. Easy money.Β
His Instagram is mostly pictures of him in exotic locations. It seems you and him have dream destinations in mind for the future as well. Nine million followers strong β and counting β he has his comments turned off to them on every post. There is also no message option anywhere. He completely cuts himself off from being accessible. A part of you is a little jealous, but at the same time you like the closeness with your fans. It feels more intimate, it gives you a reason to be punctual and come back and care about what you do. Although some, like that βmntn3000β guy, can sometimes be quite rude in the chat. You have your chat open to all, and your public Instagram is the complete opposite of Sanβs. Thirst traps, a highlight on your profile for song recommendations, and the ability to comment and message you. Not that you answer most of them. Most are gross, obnoxious, frankly misogynistic men who choose the most unhinged, disgusting words to express theirβ¦ βdesiresβ. Youβre thankful for Woo and fans like him. Stillβ¦ you find yourself wondering if you should limit your accessibility as well. Your popularity is rising. Maybe now is the time.Β
You still find yourself looking for everything and anything that has to do with him online. Everyone wants to be him or be with him. One of those guys. Of course.Β
You rest your head in your hands, groaning to no one in particular. After all the women heβs been with, you hope you can meet his expectations. A worthy costar. Same industry, different department.Β
By the time Yeosang knocks on your door at a quarter past noon, your mind is so far away he has to call you to let him in.Β
βHey, sorry.β You apologize, ushering him in and locking the door behind him.Β
βI knew you wouldnβt be awake,β he grins, making himself right at home on your couch. βIs going live for thirty minutes really all it takes to make you catatonic the rest of the day?βΒ
You roll your eyes, swatting his shoulder as you sit down next to him. βShut up, itβs not because of that. Wellβ¦ not exactly.βΒ
Yeosang quirks an eyebrow, intrigued. βGo on, then. Whatβs up?βΒ
You pull out your phone, ready to show him the evidence to back up what youβre about to say. The original email is still unchanged as you glance down at it, which is encouraging. Another reminder that you didnβt make this all up in your head. It didnβt happen in a dream, thereβs hard evidence staring you in the face.Β
Well, now or never. Out with it.Β
βI, umβ¦ I got an offer to work with Choi San.β Your voice toes the line between excitement and cautious optimism. If anyoneβs opinion matters to you at all, itβs Yeosangβs.Β
Yeosangβs eyebrows raise at the name. βLikeβ¦ the Choi San?β
βThe Choi San, yes.β You nod, confirming itβs exactly who heβs thinking about.Β
Handing your phone over to him, email ready to be read by a fresh pair of eyes, you watch his reactions closely. You find yourself biting the side of your thumb nail, a habit you keep thinking youβve grown out of, only to be proven wrong in times like these.Β
Yeosangβs face is serious as he reads it. You can tell heβs searching for any indication of this being a scam first and foremost before he digests the rest of it. Finding no blatant or well-hidden tricks, he pays more attention to the general message.Β Β Β Β Β Β Β
βAre you gonna do it?β He asks, handing your phone back to you. His voice holds some reservation to it that you clearly pick up on. You take no offense, though. Heβs just worried about you. Itβs moreβ¦ public than youβre used to.Β
βI donβt know,β you shrug, answering him honestly. βIβve done my research on him and already sent them an email back saying that I was interested and wanted to know more, butβ¦ do you think I should?β
You truly value his opinion. Yeosang has been such a good friend to you for the past couple of years. The two of you had met in your second year of college and became fast friends. When you moved to the city, about a year after he did, he helped you find your first apartment, got you a job, and checked in on you to make sure you knew you had a friend here. He made everything easier. He still does.Β Β
Yeosang shrugs, βDoesnβt matter what I think. If you feel confident about doing it, then go for it. If something is telling you to not do it, then donβt.β
He makes it sound so easy. Should it be?Β
βYeah, butβ¦ I value your opinion.β You mumble, not outwardly saying what youβre thinking. But he reads your mind anyway.Β
βY/N, itβs not gonna change my view of you if you decide to do this. If I had a problem with my best friend being a mattress actress, I wouldβve told you a long time ago. Yβknowβ¦ before I collabed with you.βΒ
At this, you canβt help but laugh, knowing heβs right. A pressure you didnβt realize was weighing on you is alleviated off your shoulders, making you feel lighter. He grins as you let out a small sigh of relief, glad that he eased some of your worries. Now, to tease you about it. As best friends do.Β
βIβm just worried that you wonβt survive the experience,β Yeosang says dramatically, covering his eyes with his arm and sneaking a smile your way.Β
βStop, what do you mean?β You push him, playfully.Β
βYou said you researched him, right?βΒ
You nod, wondering where heβs going with this. Is there something youβve missed? You feel like youβre the only one left out of a well-known inside joke. You try to think back to the videos youβve seen of him. Sure, you havenβt watched his whole filmography, but nevertheless, youβd like to believe you know roughly what to expect of him when the day comes.Β
βDid you watch the ones heβs done for βFantasyβ?β Yeosang smirks.Β
You blink, trying to remember if you did. To be totally honest, you werenβt really paying much attention to which company was posting the videos. Just that San was in them.Β
βI donβt knowβ¦ maybe?βΒ
Yeosang shakes his head, already seeming to know the answer. βYouβd know if you did,β he says definitively. βIf you wanna know what heβs really capable of, watch some of those.βΒ
You stop yourself from rolling your eyes, frustrated that no one will just tell you what theyβre talking about. You only have one guess, that it may be due to the fact that youβve only ever been with two guys before. They each taught you the basics, but everything you bring to your livestreams, you learned all on your own. And itβs not like youβre clueless when it comes to the different kinds of sexual encounters one can experience. Youβve watched porn before β hell, you do a type of it for a living. So why does everyone keep underestimating you? What does San possibly do to make everyone think you wonβt survive him?Β
A part of you kind of doesnβt want to know. You donβt need to give your creeping self-doubt any more ammo. It had taken you a long time to beat it far back enough in your mind for it to not invade every time you hit a little snag in life. A resurgence would make you question everything, make you back out of this quickly. You donβt want that. No, youβre determined even more so now to see this through. To prove everyone wrong. More importantly, though, to prove it to yourself.Β
βSounds like he sought you out though,β Yeosang says. His words almost make you jolt. Not only do they pull you out of another spiral, it reinforces something you were thinking in passing last night. Maybe you arenβt reading too much into it after all. βKinda seems like this Hongjoong guy and San are fans of yours.βΒ
You hide your face in your hands and groan, making Yeosang laugh at your rare display of shyness. Itβs frustratingly unclear to you why the idea of him watching your content makes your cheeks burn so much. Youβre obviously comfortable with people seeing your body and earning a profit from it, but you like the anonymity of the people watching. You simply donβt want to know. Perhaps itβs because heβs about to not be a faceless viewer anymore. Rather, a colleague of sorts.Β
Also, in a way, you tend to view camβing as moreβ¦ intimate than porn. The sole focus of the audience is on you. No fake plot, no costar, no distractions. Just you, reading the chat, and existing and getting off in real time.Β
βSounds like it,β you agree. βI mustβve done something he likes to pique his interest.βΒ
Yeosang shrugs, a playful grin tugging at his lips. βOr he saw the collab and this is all just an elaborate ruse to get to me.βΒ
Youβre grateful to relax enough to laugh again. βOh, I bet.β You say, playing along. Though, part of you does wonder for a brief moment if San had watched the collab and thatβs why he thought youβd be a good partner for his next project. Itβs definitely plausible.Β Β Β Β
βSo,β Yeosang leans back against the couch, crossing his legs, βwhat do you have to do now?βΒ
Remembering the phone in your hand, you look down at it, visualizing that attachment Hongjoong sent you. Yet to be opened. βThereβs a form I have to fill out, I think itβs some kind of consent form.βΒ
He nods, βYeah, thatβd make sense.βΒ
Thereβs a small silence between you that follows as he watches you stare down at your phone. You have the most recent email pulled up, analyzing it again. He watches you bite the inside of your cheek, a habit you have that comes up when youβre thinking a little too hard about something.Β Β
βDo you want me to go through it with you?β He asks, though he thinks he knows what youβll say.Β
βNo, Iβll do it myself. Itβs gonna ask likeβ¦ in depth questions,β you insinuate, almost shyly.Β
Yeosang doesnβt press you on it, which you appreciate. But you know heβs probably thinking thereβs not much he doesnβt know about you. After all, he was fingering you to high heaven in front of a camera only a week ago. Still, he doesnβt push your privacy or your boundaries. Itβs one of the many things that makes you feel safe with him.Β
Breezing past the subject, knowing you probably need to relieve some stress, he picks up one of the gaming controllers on your coffee table.Β
βRematch?β He asks, referring to a game of Mario Kart fairly won by you, though his opinion of the event is rather different. Something to do with you βinnocentlyβ bumping into him, causing him to almost drop his controller, and giving you the lead in the race. His win streak is much cleaner than yours.Β
βYouβre on,β you agree, playfully narrowing your eyes at him as he scoots away from you on the couch.Β
Thereβll be no βaccidentsβ this time. But maybe youβll think of something.Β Β
Little by little, the weight of uncertainty you feel fades into the background, instead transforming into unserious frustration as Yeosang beats you in Mario Kart six times in a row. You win the seventh round, but you highly suspect he let you. He had several speed boosts and red shells that would just disappear from his screen the next time you looked, wondering when he would fire one of those shells at you.Β
You order in, opting to stay inside and just be lazy today, and the two of you eat on the couch. When the sun eventually starts to set late in the afternoon, he takes a nap while you scroll on your phone, half-watching a K-Drama on your TV. Neither of you bring up San or the form still laying in wait in your inbox again. He wakes up around eight oβclock, yawning and stretching as he gets up to go home β he mentions that he promised his friend heβd go out with him tonight. Though he extends the offer, and part of you does want to go, you decide to be responsible and take the night to go through the form with a somewhat clearer mind than last night or this morning.Β Β Β
Almost as soon as Yeosang leaves, youβre back in bed and pulling everything up on your laptop. The attached file on the most recent email takes just a second to load, bringing you to a Google Form sheet, ready to be completed.Β
But first, you think about what he said about San. You want to know what everyone else already seems to. At least one video. Just for research purposes again.Β
In another tab on incognito mode, you hesitantly type in the search for βchoi san redfantasyβ and bite the inside of your cheek as the page loads. The typical ads pop up before youβre able to see any actual content, avoiding the scams and viruses with practiced ease. Trying to not overthink it, you just click on the first video that comes up. In fact, you barely look at the title. Itβs in all caps, a bunch of buzzwords and tags jammed together to get as many eyes on it as possible, but his name is always put first. Thatβs the seller right there. Audiences are in the market for Choi San.Β
There is no plot this time, at least none that you can discern. The lighting is darker, as well as the mood. Thereβs less build up, the action begins almost straight away after the company logo screen fades away.Β
Your chest constricts at the very first shot. A rather pretty woman, on her knees in the middle of a room. Her bare knees dig into the plush carpet beneath her and she looks up at the man in front of her, tilting her head up with a firm hand in her hair.Β
San.Β
β...didnβt you?β You barely hear him say to her, and you quickly turn up the volume on your laptop, rewinding the video ten seconds to hear the full question.Β
βYou misbehaved today, didn't you?β He purrs, nodding once to give her permission to speak.Β
βYes, sir.β She replies, obediently.Β
The hand in her hair is taken away, and yet she never takes her eyes off of him. You imagine thatβs probably what she was instructed to doβ¦ but youβre starting to think a director wasnβt involved in this. Everything seems more intimate, less corporate. Like San just set up a camera in this expensive looking hotel room. A step above amateur porn.Β
San stalks around her, humming to himself as if sizing her up. The camera cuts to a slightly different angle, farther away, and you only just now realize that her hands are tied behind her back. The multiple static angles all but confirm your theory: everything in this video is by Sanβs design.Β
He then sits down on a rather large, black leather couch, facing her. The camera caresses his features, letting you see every detail of the tailored suit heβs wearing that fits him perfectly. The suit itself is probably more expensive than five of those couches. Wordlessly, he beckons her closer with two of his fingers. He almost looks bored. But you think bored is the wrong wordβ¦ curious actually. Like heβs just taking his time, waiting for her to act first. His tempo is carefully curated and well-calculated. He reacts, even though he knows theyβre both just enacting what this company wants to see. Like this isnβt just for the cameras. Every scene is serious to him, and yet it doesnβt come across as corny or too much. You wonder why he doesnβt go into acting. He seems more than able to convince people of real chemistry between himself and his co-star each and every time. And with a face card like his, you doubt he wouldβve had many rejections.Β
Then again, you imagine itβd be rather hard to make a smooth transition into becoming a serious and respected actor after being in adult films.Β
She manages to make her way over to him, knelt in between his knees, waiting for further instruction. And he makes her wait. The camera cuts a couple of times, documenting the power dynamic from several angles. Itβs evident a long time has passed because she keeps shifting her weight, knees never quite finding relief on the floor.Β Β Β
A small whimper leaves her, and it earns her a sharp smack across the cheek. You gasp at the same time she does, not expecting that at all for an action so miniscule. In almost the same motion, Sanβs grip returns to her hair, pulling her closer to his clothed crotch.Β
βBe actually useful for once, baby.β He says sweetly, like heβs praising instead of degrading her. βEarn it.βΒ
You can tell sheβs holding back another whimper, trying to be good. San guides her further down, until her face is pressed into the front seam of his tailored pants, and holds her there until she realizes what he wants her to do. Rather pathetically, she mouths at his dick through the fabric. Heβs not even hard yet. No, he fully expects her to do all the work for him, including getting him ready.Β
While sheβsβ¦ busy, he lazily takes off his watch, setting it aside and rolls up the sleeves of his dress shirt to just above his elbows. Youβve seen him naked about a dozen times in these types of videos, and for some reason, this is what sends an uncontrollable shiver down your spine. Almost on sight, you feel how wet youβve become, panties starting to cling to you.Β
His face is stony, refusing to give away what heβs thinking. Thatβs privileged information. But the harder he gets, the more motivated she becomes, tilting her head to the side to attempt to wrap her lips around his length as best she can. And yet, he never says anything. No praise, no degradation. He lets her actions speak for themselves, lets it burrow into her mind on her own. Pathetic. She doesnβt bother looking up at him for reassurance anymore. Heβs not giving her anything to work with.Β
Abruptly, he yanks her back by the hair, just to see if she makes a noise. She does. Another sharp crack against her cheek makes you squeeze your thighs together. She takes three more slaps until he stops, his hands leave her entirely and one grips himself through his pants, sighing like heβs bored. Or rather, disappointed. From what you can discern from the print against his pants, heβs only half-hard.Β
βYou donβt want it that badly, do you?β He asks like heβs already decided her answer.Β
Frantically, she shakes her head, denying his assumption. βNo, no sir, I do want it. Please, I want it soββΒ
Unfortunately for her, his mind is already made up.Β
San rises from the couch, picking her up into his arms easily, like she weighed nothing. The camera cuts, now facing the bed, and San lays her down onto it. He then goes about tying her down to it, on all-fours. The girlβs face presses into the pillows, muffling any noise. San ties her ankles to the bedposts, leaving her spread open for him with no chance of closing herself off. Fully exposed, at his mercy. Or lack thereof.Β
San then loosens his tie before wrapping it around her throat, fashioning it into a makeshift collar and leash. He tugs it once, testing its reliability. Satisfied, he lets it go for the time being, no doubt planning on using it later. For now, he stalks around the bed, admiring his work, and assessing the best way to deal with the girl tied up in front of him.
βSince you couldnβt wait and just had to touch yourself before you came to me, Iβm gonna teach you some patience.βΒ
As if the last few times werenβt enough, an involuntary sound escapes from her lips. Soon enough, her ass is red and bruised, Sanβs hand quick to punish her for making noise.Β
βBe quiet,β he reminds sternly, βor you get nothing.βΒ
Thatβs good motivation. Suddenly, you feel like you canβt make a single noise either.Β
He disappears offscreen for a while, the camera cutting a few times to capture how the anticipation makes the girl very nervous and wet at the same time. Impatient, you skip ahead thirty seconds and San pops back into frame, holding something.Β
Thereβs no warning, no telling her what it is. Only he and the audience (you) know. He holds the vibrator wand right up to her pussy, mere centimetres away and pauses. Her toes curl in an effort to stop the rest of her body from squirming. He waits for any minuscule movement. Itβs when she cranes her neck, attempting to look back to see what heβs doing, that he turns it onto the highest setting and presses it against her clit in one swift motion.Β
Poor thing gasps and screams at the intense, unexpected vibrations, earning her another brutal round of spanks.Β
βShhh,β he hushes her softly, βbe quiet. Donβt move.βΒ
Your pulse stutters, eyes wider than they were before, and your hand starts to drift downwards, underneath your clothes, to find your clit. The relief is immediate, like scratching an itch. You work yourself up alongside her, trying to follow Sanβs instructions yourself. Breaths turning shallow, you press your lips together to keep from making any sounds. If you really wanted to immerse and challenge yourself, youβd grab your own vibrator from the drawer, but you canβt tear your gaze from the screen. You donβt want to miss anything, and you feel like pausing it would disrupt the experience. If this is potentially whatβs in store for you, and she doesnβt get a break, you donβt get one either.Β
Her fists tighten and grab at nothing, still bound behind her back. You can tell sheβs losing the fight to follow through with his instructions. San notices this too. He moves the vibrator up and down, grinding the head of it harder on her clit before moving it away again. You have no idea how sheβs managing to hold on.Β
San hears it the same time you do, not a gasp or a noise per se, but a hitch of her breath, just audible enough to hear. At the same time, her legs begin to shake, out of her control to stop them from doing so.Β
He takes the vibrator away, switching it off.Β
Her toes curl again, burying her face deeper into the pillows to silence any sounds. Your hand stops dead, even though all you want to do is keep circling your clit.Β
βSee what I have to do?β He sighs, trailing the head of the vibrator down the back of her thighs. βIf you just waited for me, I wouldnβt have to do this. I wouldnβt have to waste my time teaching you to be patient.β
Damn. Have you ever heard him talk to any of his scene partners like this? The San from the first video you watched as part of your βresearchβ seems a million miles away. A completely different person.Β
Eventually, the vibrator is returned to her clit, humming at full power. You resume your own administrations as well. San kneads her ass with his free hand, eyes glued to her body, waiting for her to fuck up. Any excuse to take the pleasure away again. An excuse comes when sheβs forced back onto the brink of an orgasm, and he switches the toy off again. But he keeps it pressed against her pussy. On instinct, her hips rock backwards, trying to chase the pleasure, and you canβt help but groan out of frustration as you take your hand away. This time, he doesnβt administer spanks to her ass, but right on her pussy. And she canβt help the high-pitched yelp that leaps from her throat. San spanks her pussy until she shuts up. You donβt realize youβve stopped breathing until the uncomfortable pressure in your throat forces you to inhale deeply.Β
The girl shudders after the last smack but doesnβt move or say a word. Youβre both rooting for her and secretly hoping sheβll screw up again, just to see what he does. Also, you want to see if heβll actually fuck her.Β
Rather impatiently, you skip ahead a couple of minutes, needing to know if heβs the type to punish by leaving her empty the whole time. It takes only a second for the video to buffer and when it does, you see that heβs added another toy, keeping it pressed deep into her pussy, right up to the very base of it. The vibrator never leaves her clit. The skin of her ass is bright red and already bruising in some areas. It looks rather painful. Sheβs moaning but itβs muffled and barely audible β you can imagine San gagged her in some way to keep her quiet after failing over and over again. Possibly with his tie. He doesnβt move the toy at all, instead just forcing her to feel the thickness and weight of it buried deep inside of her, no doubt pressing right up against her g-spot.Β
If he denies her again in this state, youβll really be scared of him.Β
And that, he does.Β
This time, she wails through her gag, her whole body locking up and then quickly deflating in defeat. But the time in between denials is no longer merciful. San waits maybe ten seconds before starting again, placing the vibrator back where it belongs.Β
God damnβ you think, becoming wetter as your fingers find your clit again, your own pleasure building. The poor girl shrieks into the pillows, incoherently pleading with him to stop. Instead of listening to her cries, San taps the vibrator against her pussy, driving her β and you β even more crazy.Β
βIβm doing you a favor,β he says flatly, not caring that sheβs essentially begging for mercy. βYou should be apologizing for making me waste my time to teach you basic manners.βΒ
Your mouth drops open at that. Heβs so mean, and yet if you were in her position β which you may be soon β youβre pretty sure youβd start apologizing right away. But she canβt, at least not properly. Not with a gag in her mouth and her face half-pressed into the pillows. You imagine after being denied what must be nearing ten orgasms at this point, her mind is also going a bit blank.Β
He presses the vibrator harder against her, making her back arch. βTell me how sorry you are and maybe Iβll stop.βΒ
That grabs her attention. Muffled, garbled, and barely full sentences immediately tumble from her lips, on the off chance that heβll take pity on her and stop this edging torture. Her body shudders violently, cutting off her voice entirely.Β Β
Rather surprisingly, he does let up. Both toys disappear at once, and he watches her body collapse onto the bed, burning muscles unable to hold herself up any longer. But he doesnβt let the relief stay for long. His hand twists in her hair, yanking her upright until her back is against his chest. With the other, he rips the gag out β which was, in fact, his tie.Β
βIβll give you one chance to tell me the truth,β he mutters in her ear, his other hand lingering dangerously close to her sore mound. βDid you just cum without permission? Yes or no.βΒ
A sob tears itself from her throat, knowing that sheβs been caught.Β
San pulls her hair again, causing her to yelp again. βAnswer me,β he hisses, βand donβt you dare lie to me.βΒ
βY-yes, sir,β she whimpers, honest.Β
He doesnβt say anything. He doesnβt let her go. He just makes her stay with that feeling of guilt, the shame of being caught, and the foreboding knowledge that heβs going to have to punish her again. With his free hand, he runs the pads of his fingers through her soaking wet folds, collecting the evidence for himself. To humiliate her even further, he shoves those fingers into her mouth, pressing on her tongue. She whines around them, which he rewards by shoving his fingers deeper, into her throat. Tears flow down her face and neck, already utterly fucked out and he hasnβt even touched her himself, really. Heβs still fully clothed, for fuckβs sake.Β
San sighs, thinking aloud, βWhat should I do with you, hm?βΒ
Busy choking and spluttering around the intrusion in her throat, she canβt answer him at all. He probably doesnβt want an answer, though. You have a feeling he knows exactly what heβs going to do with her.Β
Once again, youβre proven correct when he lets her go and pulls his fingers out of her mouth. He watches her gasp for air and cough violently for a fleeting moment of relative peace before dragging her back towards the edge of the bed.Β
βFucking useless slutβ¦β he mutters to himself, just audible enough for her to hear. βYou wanna cum so bad? Fine.βΒ
A new toy is brought into frame, this one looking more daunting than the other two. You can tell itβs one of those two-for-one types, and your heart goes out to her. It slips inside of her easily, though itβs thicker than the previous dildo, all but confirming once again that she did cum without his permission. This time, thereβs no mystery or question about what heβs going to do to her. She knows. The knowing is almost worse than the not-knowing.Β
He switches it on without much ceremony. She does her best to not move or make a sound, but another orgasm builds rapidly. Too fast, too soon.Β
For seven straight orgasms, he just watches her. He doesnβt even touch himself even though you can tell heβs hard beneath those tailored pants. Her pleas fall on deaf ears, like heβs not even in the room. Youβve barely managed to keep up with her, coaxing two weak orgasms from your own body with just your fingers and already feeling exhausted. Fuck, maybe everyoneβs rightβ¦Β
You tap the screen to see how much more of the video is left, and your eyebrows raise when you see thereβs still ten more minutes. You decide to skim through, just curious if he ever does let her have his cock.
Spoiler alert: he does not.Β
In reality, the only thing he changes is that he jerks himself off, getting off on her screams and pleas for him to turn the toy off, that sheβs had enough. For the last two orgasms he forces her through, he adds his thumb to her clit, circling it mercilessly.Β
βOne more, come on. This is what you wanted, isnβt it? To cum?βΒ
Through her tears and scratchy voice, she warbles, βW-wantβ wanted you t-to fuck meβ¦βΒ
He only laughs at her, and it sends such a blow to your psyche.Β
βDid you really think I would?βΒ
She screams again, mixing with her sobs and choked groans as the final orgasm rips through her worn-out body. The only act of kindness he gives her is removing the toy and kissing her back, in between her shoulder blades.Β
He takes his time to untie her ankles from the bedposts, his hands smoothing over the skin where the rope had been. Wrecked and twitching, she curls into a ball on the bed, pussy sore and swollen. Knowing this, San drags her back down towards the foot of the bed, forcing her legs apart again. Her hands weakly try to push him away, but he ducks down, licking a near-fatal stripe up her folds, sucking harshly on her clit. Voice basically gone, her scream is broken and breathy.Β
Thatβs a habit he has, youβve noticed. Or maybe just a signature thing. No matter what, when heβs done with his scene partner, he gives their pussy one final lick. As if heβs sealing the deal. Something theyβll feel long after the cameras stop rolling, along with the ache of their inner walls.Β
San chuckles, patting her inner thigh with his hand before pulling her onto the floor, back down onto her knees. He doesn't say anything more as he jerks off in front of her, aiming his cock right at her face. He lets her suck on it, much to your surprise, and he eventually comes. Some of it inside of her mouth, and the rest, he smears across her face. The final act of humiliation for her.Β
You come back to the forms after a cold shower and a half an hour long pacing session in your living room.Β
With a somewhat clearer head, you decide to take it one question at a time.Β
At first glance, you canβt help but feel like youβre filling out the forms youβd normally get in a doctorβs office. It covers everything. Height, weight, age, consent for Afterdark to inquire upon certain medical history to ensure the prevention of any diseases or illnesses, and payment information. On the next page, it goes deeper, and you almost want to take another lap before you dive in and check off any of the boxes.Β
Thereβs a checklist of kinks, each one with a box to check if any are βhard noβsβ or βhard yessesβfor you. You gotta hand it to Afterdark, theyβre very thorough. At the very top, just above this checklist, you notice two more boxes simply labelled βRoughβ and βGentleβ.Β
Ah.Β
This must be the reason that every video with San feels different. Not just because of whatever context they provide in the beginning of the video, but he never exactly has the same go-to way of fucking every time. Except of course, that parting move heβs so accustomed to doing. With some women, he takes it very slow, gentle and caring with lots of praise, and with others, like the one you just watched, he is ruthless and mean, denying orgasms and spanking them until their skin turns an alarming shade of red. Theyβve tailored their own experience with him. That makes you feel a bit better actually, gives you more of a sense of control. Youβre not just walking into this with no say in what he does to you, nor will you be blindsided. Actually, youβll have a pretty good idea, and no worries that heβll do something youβre uncomfortable with.Β
The empty boxes still taunt you. Which version of him do you want?Β
After much consideration, you eventually let fate decide. You pick both options. Rough and gentle. Letβs see what he does with that.Β
Moving on, forcing yourself to breathe slower, you continue down the list of kinks. Again, itβs very thorough, even asking for locations that youβd be okay filming in. You check off βhard noβ on most, if not all of the βbodily fluidsβ section of the kink list. All except creampies, crying, and squirting. You wonder if heβll be able to make you do that. If so, you donβt want to discourage him from it. Youβre okay with toys, cunnilingus, fingers in your mouth, body worship, hair pulling, hickies, clothed sex, light bondage, the traffic light system, and spanking, just to name a few. You also mean to check off a hard βyesβ to aftercare. Aftercare is a non-negotiable for you. One of your exes never did that for you, and itβs been a dealbreaker ever since you got out of that relationship. You dislike feeling used after-the-fact. Discarded. Itβs an ugly shock to your system, one that youβd like to avoid if possible.Β
Double checking everything on this page, you go to the third and final page.Β
In the top half, thereβs an interactive calendar so you can input dates and times when youβre free to do the shoot. Youβre pretty much free all the time, if youβre being honest. You just have a family wedding to go to in late August, two months from now. Though youβd rather do the shoot later in the day, not wanting to risk sleeping through it with your terrible sleep schedule. So, you mark every afternoon and evening as βavailableβ.Β
In the bottom half of the page, thereβs just one last question, accompanied by a text box: βTell us about yourself, and what we can do to better tailor this experience for you.βΒ
You have to admit, you werenβt expecting this kind of question to come up. They want to know about you? Tailor this opportunity for you?Β
Huh.Β
Your mind goes blank at first. What could they possibly want to know? What are they actually looking for? Thereβs really no telling.Β
Slowly, you type out a vague summary of where you grew up, why you started doing cam-shows, and that your favorite color is purple. When it comes to writing about how they can improve on this collaboration, your fingers hover over the keyboard. Stuck. You could just straight up not say anything, or just put βN/Aβ. But your inner professional tells you to answer it. You search yourself, wondering if thereβs anything that would make you feel a little more comfortable while there. You assume theyβll provide a robe for you, or something to cover you up when youβre not filming, but youβve also heard how βfucking coldβ porn sets are kept. Not exactly wanting to show up with a blanket from home, you decide thatβll be your one request.Β
βIf itβs not too much to ask, Iβd like a blanket while on set. Thank you! :)βΒ
You double β triple β check each form page, making sure you didnβt accidentally check something off or type in your information wrong. After you confirm that everything is accurate and spelled correctly, you click on the βsubmitβ button. A βthank youβ screen pops up, and you quickly exit the tab, not wanting to think about it anymore. Itβs out of your hands now.Β
But speaking of the hands itβs now in, you have to set up a meeting time with this Kim Hongjoong guy.Β Β
Right. Okay, onto the next step.Β
In a new email, you type out all the dates and times youβre free β you may have made yourself sound busier than you actually are β and send it off to him. Glad to have everything done, you flop back against your pillows and groan. You replay all the images youβve seen. All the things heβs done to multiple women.Β
Itβs the next day that ends up being the meeting day.Β
You opt for a virtual meeting, reasoning that itβll probably be quicker and easier for both of you. From what it sounds like, being employed by Afterdark and Choi San keeps Hongjoong rather busy.Β
You do your makeup and hair, wanting to look presentable. Itβs the shirt that gives you a headache. Youβre rather unsure how professional you should look. What does someone wear to a meeting like this? You look down at your chest, trying to mentally calculate how much of it is appropriate to show, and choosing a shirt based on that. Eventually, you just pick a nice triangle lace cami. Kim Hongjoong will just have to excuse the fact that itβs summer and hot in your apartment in the afternoons. Youβve been meaning to figure out how the air conditioning works. Itβs hi-tech in a way that truly baffles you. Youβll get Yeosang to figure it out the next time he comes over.Β
Moving your laptop into the kitchen for the natural light, you try to shake the nerves out of your hands as you walk around the kitchen island. You grab a cold water from the fridge and drink half of it before forcing yourself to sit down. The meeting is set for two-thirty, just a few minutes away. You kind of want to scream into the pillows on your couch. This will be the final stage until you actually go through with this whole collaboration. The last buffer until it happens.Β
In the upper right hand corner, you see an email notification from Hongjoong, providing you with a link to a video chatroom. For a full sixty seconds, you pretend you havenβt seen it yet. But when that minute is up, and you have to be an adult, you take one more sip of water before clicking on the link and sneaking a glance at yourself in the reflection of your laptop as the camera loads.Β
Thereβs a small boop sound from your laptop, signalling that the call has been connected and you brace yourself for a scam. Your hand hovers above the trackpad, ready to hit βend callβ at a momentβs notice. When his camera finally loads, you breathe a little easier. Heβs in an office based on context clues of what you can see around him, and heβs rather handsome himself. That admittedly takes you aback. He has short, dark brown hair, round eyes, and a charming smile once he sees you on his screen. He pushes his glasses further up his sharp nose, and leans forward in his seat a little bit.Β
βMiss Y/N! Itβs so nice to talk with you today, how are you?βΒ
βIβm doing well, thank you. Are you the one Iβve been emailing?β You ask when he doesnβt introduce himself by name. You just want to clarify.Β
He laughs to break any awkward tension, βYes, thatβs me. My apologies, Iβm Sanβs agent, Kim Hongjoong.β
βOkay, good.β You smile back, shoulders relaxing a little more. His dress shirt makes you feel a bitβ¦ well, underdressed, but when you notice that the top two buttons are undone, it makes you feel a bit better. Heβs clearly not going for ultra-professional right now either. Off camera, in your lap, you play with one of your rings, giving your nervous hands something to do.Β
Unexpectedly, the first ten minutes are spent just making small-talk, especially after finding out you and him grew up around the same area. He asks you how you like the city, and you find yourself telling him about how much you love it, and that you never want to leave. Turns out he shares the same sentiment. Itβs starting to feel less like a rigid job interview and more like a casual interaction. Nothing to be afraid of. You feel much more comfortable than you did ten minutes ago, thatβs for sure.Β
Hongjoong eventually looks over to the side, where his desktop computer is and starts clicking around, the light reflecting off of his glasses. And you realize that itβs time to actually start talking about the collab. You fix your earring for no real reason, just to give yourself something to do.Β Β
βSo, Iβve received the forms you completed β thank you for doing that, by the way β and I was wondering if you have any questions for me about them?βΒ
You pause before you answer. Nowβs the time to ask, and with the right person, too. Humming to fill the silence, you think about a good question to ask first.Β
Hongjoong picks up his phone when it starts vibrating incessantly, and looks at the screen for only a few seconds before placing it face down on his desk. Someone must be trying to get in touch with him, but he doesnβt bother with replying right now. You know it must be important, whatever it is, so you appreciate him keeping you the center of his attention right now.Β
βI guess Iβve been wondering aboutβ¦ likeβ¦ if I check off certain boxes will we do all of that? Orβ¦?βΒ
Very eloquent.Β
Luckily, he doesnβt seem to think anything of it. βOh, no, no. Usually what happens is we take a look at it, figure out which ones would work best together and with you and San, and take it from there. Itβs just to see what youβre comfortable with and to see which direction you want this collab to go.βΒ
That makes sense. And now that you think about it, what if someone puts a βhard yesβ next to something that San would check off as a βhard noβ, obviously they wouldnβt do it. Itβs a mutual agreement. They find the things that match between you two and take it from there.Β
βActually,β Hongjoong says with a small grin, still scrolling through the forms on his computer. βYou two are pretty similar. It wasnβt hard to match up.βΒ
You hear it but your brain doesnβt process what it means yet.Β
βOh, really?β You say, not knowing how else to respond.Β
Hongjoong just hums, nodding once. He pushes his glasses up again before turning back to you.Β
βRegardless of that, though, I wanted to also let you know that if at any point during the shoot you feel uncomfortable and want to leave, you can, and you will be paid in full, no questions asked. Obviously though, if you leave before, or if you donβt show up at all, we canβt really do anything to pay you. We have this in place because we donβt want you to feel trapped once the scene starts. Does that make sense?βΒ
You nod quickly, βYes, it does.βΒ
βPerfect,β he says. βSo, with your schedule that you sent me, if youβre okay with it, we can set the date relatively soon. Is this coming Friday, at six oβclock alright?βΒ
Friday. As inβ¦ Friday, two days from now, Friday? Your mouth dries instantly. Two days from now. Is he not busy? You assumed this wouldnβt happen for a couple of weeks, at least. A delusional voice in your head tells you that maybe he cleared his schedule to be with you sooner rather than later. Oh, sure. Yeah, right.
Still, it baffles you.Β
And yet you hear yourself say, βFridayβs good for me!βΒ
Well, now it has to be whether youβre ready or not. Your hands itch for your phone, needing to text Yeosang immediately, even though you know heβll probably find your dilemma rather entertaining.Β You also need to book a waxing appointment and get your nails done ASAP. Maybe even a facial, too.
Fucking hell, Y/N, the things you get yourself into.Β
Hongjoong lights up, quickly typing something on his keyboard, scrunching his nose once or twice to keep his glasses from moving down again. A few more clicks of his mouse, and itβs done.Β
βOkay, perfect. Iβve got you booked for six oβclock this Friday. If you could email me where youβd like our driver to pick you up, thatβd be great. Otherwise, do you have any other questions, comments, or concerns for me?βΒ
Your lips part. Driver? Someone from Afterdark is going to bring you to the set? Your right hand grips your phone, turning it over and preparing to call Yeosang as soon as you hang up with Hongjoong.Β
Fuck, okay. Sure, why not?Β
βOh, umββ you suddenly remember one thing he hasnβt mentioned at all. βIs there a script? Like, do I need to know any lines beforeβ¦?βΒ
Hongjoong answers right away, βAh, this shoot will be unscripted. Itβll feel more natural that way.βΒ
More natural. Your heart feels like a brick in your chest. To be honest though, youβre really glad there is no script. However, a rubric would be helpful as well. You nod, acknowledging that information. So it really will be like the videos you watched. Thatβs the experience youβll be getting.Β
βOkay, cool,β you reply, desperately needing another drink of water for your dry mouth. βThank you.βΒ
Hongjoong smiles politely. βNo problem. Alright, well if everything sounds good, weβll see you on Friday! Thank you for taking the time to speak with me today.β
We.Β
Again, heβs probably just talking about the company, but Yeosangβs words from yesterday are stuck in your head. Your secret delusions and Yeosangβs smart mouth are never a good mix.Β
βSee you Friday! Thank you.β You reply politely, the very picture of calmness and professionalism.Β Β
And once the call disconnects, youβre slamming your laptop shut and calling Yeosang to tell him everything.Β Β Β
He picks up on the third ring, yawning and obviously not fully awake just yet. You forgot he went out with his friend last night. Still, itβs definitely time for him to be awake now.Β
As expected, once you rattle off every detail of the call you were just on, Yeosang laughs his ass off.Β
βOh man,β he says with an audible sigh, βyouβre fucked.βΒ Β Β Β Β Β
Part of you wishes that the driver will somehow get hopelessly lost on the way to the set.Β
Youβre sure heβs been there multiple times before, but you pray for a random dose of amnesia anyway. Itβs not that youβre second-guessing the decision β not at all β you just werenβt expecting the day to come so soon. Itβs crazy how forty-eight hours now seems like no time at all. You shake out your hands as you step out of the car, and look up at the building. Itβs rather unassuming, blending seamlessly into the numerous ones around it. Nothing about it screams that this is where adult films are produced. Not that you really expected it to.Β
The driver parks with the hazards on, and gets out as well to let you into the building via a keycard. You thank him quietly as he holds the door open for you. He mustβve told you his name, but for the life of you, you cannot remember it. He points you in the direction of the elevators, and confirms that heβll see you later to drive you home.
Then, youβre alone. He gets back into the car and drives it around the building, to an underground parking garage you assume.
You take a deep breath in the lobby, finding the elevators quickly and starting towards them. Hongjoong said the shoot is on the eighth floor, so you press the β8β button once in the elevator car.Β
As soon as the doors shut, the silence and gravity of what youβre there to do settles in immediately. You force yourself to take a deep breath, really dragging out how long you exhale to try and ease your heart rate. The second floor comes and goes, as does the third. But the higher you climb, the tighter your throat becomes. On floor five, you think of bailing. Past the sixth floor, already almost there, Yeosangβs custom text ringtone startles you. Glad to distract yourself, you immediately read the text.Β Β
[yeoyeoπ»]: donβt let him intimidate you, youβre the one he wanted for thisΒ
[yeoyeoπ»]: remember heβs literally just some guy and youβll be fineΒ
[yeoyeoπ»]: youβre gonna be great :) Β Β Β
You canβt help but smile, and you roll your shoulders back to stand taller. Heβs right, as always. Choi San is many things, but at the end of the day, he is just a man. You have to view this as a very elaborate hookup rather than a career opportunity, just to calm your nervous system if anything else.Β
When the elevator doors open on the eighth floor, someone is already waiting for you on the other side.Β
Hongjoong.Β
You donβt realize until this moment how relieved you are to see a somewhat familiar face.Β
βMiss Y/N,β he greets, extending his hand out for you to shake, βitβs so nice to meet you in person.βΒ
You smile warmly, returning the greeting and hoping that your handshake is up to par. Before you have time to possibly overthink such a small thing, he asks if you need anything.Β
βOh, umβ¦no, not at the moment, thank you.βΒ
βOf course,β he nods once. βIf you do need something at any time, please let one of us know.βΒ
You assume that βone of usβ probably means the team of people youβre about to meet and be fucked in front of. Forcing another deep breath, you manage another easy smile and thank him again.Β
He motions for you to follow him, and you have to look down at your feet to get them to move. You beg yourself inwardly to get a grip and soon.Β
Hongjoong leads you down a long hallway, deeper into the Afterdark floorplan. Youβre surprised by how nice it smells in here, like someone is burning incense somewhere. The walls are decorated with miscellaneous artworks and some awards, as well as headshots of the actors and actresses signed with them. At the end of the hallway, there are two huge double doors, and he pulls one of them open with ease, letting you walk into the gigantic room it reveals first.Β
When you finally enter the large set, you can instantly feel the drastic temperature drop. Just as you had been led to believe, they must have turned down the thermostat in the room, making it several degrees colder than the early summer weather outside, and you rub your arms to try and warm them up.Β
No more than five seconds after the two of you enter, Hongjoong is suddenly flanked by a young woman with a clipboard. A sticky note flutters as she keeps pace with you and him, and she mutters something to him that you canβt hear.Β
βNo, thatβs alright,β he says quietly, βI think heβs good without her right now, but double check for me, please.βΒ
You keep your eyes on the floor, pretending that you didnβt hear anything, but your mind races. Who is βsheβ, you wonder? As quickly as she appeared, the assistant scurries off, past the camera and lighting crews, and over countless miscellaneous wires with practiced ease.Β
While the two of you walk, youβre rather relieved that no one is staring at you as you go by. Youβre just another actress to them, and right now, thatβs okay with you. And luckily, the path Hongjoong is taking you on is relatively close to the perimeter of the set, so youβre not exactly the center of attention right now. A part of the wall juts out, making it look like a closet, but once he opens the door, you see itβs a dressing room. Complete with vanity lights, a full bathroom, and a brand new silk robe for you to wear on set, hanging up by the door. Thereβs also a small, plush couch up against the wall next to the vanity that you have a feeling you will be texting Yeosang on as soon as youβre left alone.Β
βThis is all yours for the day,β Hongjoong says, βsomeone will come around in a minute to help with hair and makeup, and then weβll start.β
You nod, swallowing down as much of your anxiety as possible.Β
βWill you, umββ you ask before you can stop yourself. Hongjoong pauses before he heads out, waiting expectantly for you to finish your question. βAre you gonna be on set the whole time?βΒ
His expression changes into something akin to surprise. Obviously, he wasnβt expecting you to ask anything about himself. He doesnβt answer straight away, taking a moment to try and understand why youβre asking that. You can almost see the professional within him piecing together a corporate response in real time.
βWe try to limit how many people are in the room to those who are absolutely necessary. I usually stay close in case someone needs me. Why?βΒ
You wave your hand, trying to brush everything off. βNo, I was just wondering. Nevermind. Thank you!βΒ
Hongjoong looks like heβs about to say something, but ultimately leaves you alone, gently closing the door behind him.Β
As soon as it clicks shut, youβre moving to sit on the couch, ready to call Yeosang, but you stop yourself at the last minute. Youβre acting crazy, you do realize that. And you have a sneaking suspicion heβll tell you the exact same thing.Β
Instead, to satiate your need to call him, you reread his last three texts of encouragement.Β
Lock in. Remember who the hell you are. Now.Β
You put on some ego-boosting music so youβre not just getting ready in silence, and quickly undress before hair and makeup arrive. Folded neatly on the vanity, is your outfit for the scene. A tight, cropped black lace cami, and a plaid mini skirt that leaves nothing to the imagination.Β
No panties anywhere in sight. No bra, either. Total and easy access.Β
Your lower stomach starts to heat up, already envisioning how San might go about undressing you. From what youβve seen, rarely does he let girls undress themselves. No, he wants to be the one to do it. Like heβs unwrapping a present, just for him.Β Β
After you throw your hoodie onto the couch with the rest of your pile of clothes, you turn back to the vanity, noticing a small army of mini water bottles lined up and waiting for you if need be. Youβre almost positive that if you look in the vanity drawer, youβll find snacks as well. Maybe you can get used to this. But youβll wait to give your final verdict after the job you came here to do is done. Itβs best to wait.Β
Youβre only waiting for a minute or two before thereβs a light knock on the door. Two women wearing face masks enter the dressing room, bowing to you and introducing themselves. You try to remember their names β Youngmi, you think is the makeup artist, and Rina, the hair stylist β but your brain is elsewhere, working double overtime to try to calm you down. Luckily, the Britney Spears song in the background is doing a lot of the heavy lifting. Youngmi and Rina are quick, and good at what they do. Rina makes you laugh by scrunching her nose and singing along to the song as she brushes through your hair. Youngmi only rolls her eyes at her colleague, but itβs all in good fun.Β
By the time theyβre done, you no longer feel like the scared outsider that doesnβt look the part. They made you even more beautiful.Β
There she is, you think as you admire yourself in the mirror.Β
You sigh in relief, feeling much more confident than before. And not only that, you feel ready. Itβs not the easiest thing to turn your nervousness into excitement, but somehow, this time, you manage to do it. So many girls would kill to be in your shoes right now β or, in your skirt. You had kicked your shoes off next to the couch.Β
You make sure to thank Youngmi and Rina before they bring you out, not knowing if youβll have a chance once youβre on set. With one more spritz of your perfume that you brought with you from home, and a last minute decision to bring the robe out with you, you finally follow them out towards the set. Just mere feet from where youβll beβ¦ βperformingβ.Β
As youβre walking and looking around, you start to wonder if San makes it a point to surround himself with equally beautiful people. Or maybe itβs a company requirement.Β
Sure, maybe Hongjoong, Youngmi, and Rina are just coincidences, but even the camera and lighting crew are arguably just as pretty. Speaking of Hongjoong, you look around, noting that he isnβt anywhere to be found at the moment. Heβs probably with his talent right now.Β
When youβre introduced to the director, you almost say something about it. Everyone in this room is attractive. Conventionally, unconventionally, and everything in between.Β
βHello Ms. Y/L/N, Iβm Choi Jongho, Iβll be directing you two today.β He introduces himself, bowing politely and shaking your hand.Β
You bow your head and reply, βHi, itβs nice to meet you.βΒ
He offers you a chair to sit in while everyone waits for San to come out, and you take it gratefully. You donβt know how long heβll be. Youngmi and Rina excuse themselves, heading off in the other direction together, walking with purpose. You drape your robe across the back of it, unsure if youβre supposed to give it to someone or take it with you onto the set.Β
βWould you like anything to drink, Ms. Y/L/N?β The director asks, noticing that you donβt have anything with you ready for any breaks.Β
Director Choi only refers to you as βMs. Y/L/N.β Very professional, cordial even. Makes you feel like more than an object his star is about to fuck on screen. Youβre being treated with real respect, which is a pleasant surprise in comparison to what you had expected from the porn industry.Β
You look around yourself, only just now realizing you didnβt take one of those mini water bottles from your dressing room like you originally planned.Β
βA water, pleaseββ you start to say. As soon as the last syllable of βwaterβ is spoken, an assistant hands you one. You didnβt even see him standing next to you, much less holding a bottle. Then again, you arenβt really paying attention to whether or not people are carrying water bottles or not right now. Damn. Β Β
You try to warm up your arms by rubbing them, now that youβre virtually wearing next to nothing in this arctic-like room. Only a few moments later, a blanket is handed over to you wordlessly by another assistant, a quick bow following the action. You tilt your head down as a responding bow, shocked. You didnβt even have to say anything.Β
Is this what San is used to? Everything given to him at once, on a silver platter with no questions asked? You imagine every single thing handed to him accompanied by hopeful, round eyes looking at him for his approval, only to be ignored or thanked by a small nod. Youβre so used to doing everything yourself, this type of treatment makes you feelβ¦ stuck up β and every fiber of your being screams at you to make sure none of the staff think that of you.Β
βSan will be out in just a moment,β Director Choi says, but his heart isn't in it. He checks his watch and glances towards San's dressing room with nearly well-concealed impatience. It is rather late in the day, and you only just now think about the possibility that they may have been here since early morning. Maybe even shooting San with someone else. Itβs entirely possible. You can imagine they all just want to get this last one done and go home. None of them would ever let that show, though. No, you have to admit everyone here is quite professional.Β
Your hands absentmindedly twirl a strand of hair around your finger as you zone out. At least for now, you can zone out with a blanket wrapped around you.Β
The air shifts just moments later.
Itβs like a sudden pressure drop where everything goes still for only a second. That one second feels like a lifetime as you turn your head to see whatβs going on. Though, in your heart you know exactly what it is without needing to look β itβs the arrival of the main attraction.Β
From where you are, leaned back in your chair, you canβt see him too well. Heβs surrounded by a team that moves with him like a clump of cells, or maybe in this case, like sheep in a herd. Finishing touchups by Youngmi and Rina, an assistant by his side carrying a medium-sized leather bag and holding his coffee cup when San hands it to him, and other miscellaneous characters that float around the star. Everyone wants to be near him in some way.Β
Hongjoong stays at the back of it all, looking down at his phone as he walks.Β
The team finally disperses one by one, revealing more of Choi San to your eyes.Β
When San finally gets close enough to you, whatever air in your lungs is promptly sucker-punched out of you at the sight of his refreshing beauty. Itβs even more pronounced in real life. Youβre not entirely sure how to greet him, or what heβs used to. But you remember Yeosangβs encouragement again: Heβs just a guy. Donβt let him intimidate you. Youβre gonna be great.Β
Heβs just a guy. Youβve dealt with those before. Itβs just that this guy in particular is crafted like an apology for creating men in the first place. And a couple of days ago, you were watching him make a girl cry on a bed that looks quite similar to the one on set right now.Β
You stand up, smoothing down your skirt and standing still, hands clasped in front of you.Β
βHey Jongho, sorry weβre late,β Hongjoong calls over, pocketing his phone. He side-eyes San, who bows his head in apology as he walks.Β Β
The director waves him off, clearly used to his tardiness and the apologies that follow. βItβs alright,β he says, βyouβre actually earlier than we thought youβd be.βΒ Β Β
βWe need to go over the rules with her,β San says once heβs close enough to you and the director, sounding tired. You wonder if he just woke up. He rolls up the sleeves of his dress shirt as he speaks, and catches you looking. You donβt see it when you quickly avert your eyes, but his whole demeanor changes. No longer lethargic, he becomes awake and alert at the sight of you.Β
Director Choi nods and grabs a clipboard from his own directorβs chair. You nervously roll your ankle, hearing it crack quietly in the interim.Β Β
βRight, number one rule is consent. If at any time you want to stop, just say the word. No questions asked. Second rule is to keep all details of this shoot private, including any conversations with each other,β At this, Director Choi looks up at you. βThird rule is health and safety, but Hongjoong said you covered that with him, and when you sent in the form,β Again, his eyes flick up from the clipboard to glance at you. βFourth is to be respectful at all times β thereβs no room for ego here. And lastly, donβt look at the camera unless told to, otherwise keep the illusion.βΒ
You go over each rule in your head before you forget. Consent, confidentiality, feel safe, be respectful, and donβt look at the camera. Simple enough. You keep your chin up, and shoulders back. You force that annoying inner voice of self-doubt to mumble the lyrics of the Britney song from earlier.Β
βFollow these, and weβll have a great shoot day. We should be ready to go in just a few minutes.β Director Choi offers both of you a quick smile before he turns on his heel and walks towards the cameraman, getting everything finalized and ready to shoot. Your heart pounds underneath the robe. Hongjoong steps closer to San, muttering something to him before walking back towards the dressing room.Β
Youβre just about to walk over to the set to get used to it and be ready to go whenever they are, when San steps right in front of you, effectively blocking the way.Β Β
Out of the blue, he crowds your personal space, and you have to really dig deep to make yourself stay put. Right where you stand. Donβt be intimidated. At the end of the day, youβre both here to do the same job, and both of you are successful in your own rights. Heβs just a man, you remind yourself again.Β
San towers over you, his shirt opened just enough for you to see his perfectly toned and tan chest right in your face. You keep eye contact, even though all you want to do is look away. Itβs much easier to be confident and independent on your own turf, but here on his, itβs more of a challenge. Still, you stand your ground. You have to if heβs going to keep sizing you up. He has been since he walked out here.Β Β
βYou didnβt cum,β he says matter-of-factly.Β
β¦Β
Pardon? Did you hear him right? What an odd opening line to say to someone youβre meeting for the first time.Β
Your lips part and eyebrows furrow, rather startled. βIβm sorry?βΒ
Thereβs no way you heard him correctly.Β Β
βYour last liveshow,β he shrugs. βAm I right?βΒ
Wellβ¦ yes, butβ how didβ?Β
Is this how he starts all of his conversations? With a personal accusation?Β
βThatβs alright. We all do it sometimes,β he shrugs again. He leans down so his mouth is next to your ear and lowers his voice. βYouβre not gonna fake it with me, though,β he says, and the terrifying thing is that he sounds genuine. Itβs not unfounded cockiness or meaningless bravado. He means what he says in all seriousness. He says it like you shouldnβt worry about it. Like itβs a promise.Β
And you exhibit monumental self-control to not clench your thighs together at this moment.Β
Your mind races at a million miles a minute. That, you didnβt expect. Isnβt that all that porn is? Fake, overblown orgasms for the girls and endless, guaranteed pleasure regardless for the men? Youβre starting to think that this may not be the case with him. You think about the videos you watched as part of your βresearchβ, and a bolt of electricity zips up your spine. You never doubted that he made his costars feel good, but you know full well that a lot of porn actresses pretend that theyβve cum with their scene partner. But with him, now you know: all of the girls werenβt acting. In fact, you really doubt that they needed to fake just how good he made them feel. The last video you watched of him comes back to mindβ¦ you wonder if heβll make you scream like that too.
Unsure of how to respond to that, you just take a small step backwards to put some distance between you two. Room to think and process if possible. But heβs relentless, and he seems to like getting up in peopleβs space. A mischievous glint in his eye tells you that heβs enjoying this particular encounter especially. Heβs definitely the type of guy that finds it fun to make girls flustered or nervous.Β
You swallow hard.Β
βYou sound rather confident,β you note, still trying your best to hold eye contact with him. To not back down or seem weak. Youβre sure itβs not working. You just refuse to melt all over him, or suck up to him. Especially not when heβs the one who asked you here.Β Β
Surprisingly, he smirks. βShouldnβt I be? Iβve done my research, I know you probably have done yours as well.βΒ
So you were right. Yeosang, too. San has seen your content before. And not only has he seen your previous works, he was right there with you, watching your last live. Your speculation sounds a lot like confirmation now.Β
βDoes that make you nervous, kitten?β He whispers, tilting his head slightly to the side like heβs about to kiss you. He could if he just leaned forward a couple more inches.Β
A little, you admit to yourself. Your heart hammers against your chest like itβs trying to push you forward, to get closer to him. At this proximity, you can easily smell his cologne and dammit, somehow it makes him even more attractive. Youβre almost getting annoyed with him now. Surely there should be at least one flaw to him, something that makes him human like the rest of the world.Β
βNo,β you lie, βIβm fine.β Arms crossed. Eyes up.Β
San laughs lightly, and his smile instantly becomes the most attractive thing about him so far, even if itβs at your own expense.Β
βIf you say so,β he shrugs again.Β
He doesnβt move away from you, though. Not right away. His gaze lingers on your lips for a fleeting moment, which gives you just enough time to come up with a question of your own.Β
βSo, youβre a fan of mine?βΒ
At that, he pauses. But, he doesnβt shy away from it.Β
βYeah,β he says, owning up to it immediately. He straightens back up as you nod, taking in the information. βHave been for a while now. I saw that other collab you did with that guy, it was really fuckinβ hot.βΒ
You make a mental note to let Yeosang know he was right about that, as well. To be honest, you werenβt expecting the compliment.Β Β
βIβmβ glad you liked it,β you say, clearing your throat in the middle of the sentence. Youβre doing pretty well on the outside despite your nervousness beginning to rise again on the inside. San studies you once more, like heβs searching for something on you that only he can see. You step back again and turn your face away from him as you take a sip from your water bottle, taking your time to screw the cap back on.Β
βMmβ¦ youβre even prettier in real life,β he says, so casually it almost doesnβt register.Β
You nearly swallow wrong, just barely avoiding choking on the small amount of water still left in your mouth. Luckily, Director Choi calls over to you two to start making your way onto set.Β
The final few minutes begin to tick down.Β Β
You donβt attempt to hide the deep breath you take, but you do try to not make it very noticeable. Placing the water bottle onto the chair you were just in, you clear your throat again.Β
βAny final advice or warnings for me before we start?β You ask, keeping your voice casual and light. Itβs a subtle dig to him, but you mean no malice behind the words. Fortunately, he picks up on it.Β
βOh, tons,β he grins, keeping pace with you onto the set. Itβs almost easy to forget the cameras.Β Β
You steal a glance at him as you walk, the floor bitterly cold beneath your feet. With each step the bed gets closer and closer. Now finally getting a chance to see the set in detail, youβre pretty impressed. Itβs a pretty realistic bedroom setting, complete with shelves decorated with trinkets and records, but vague enough to have no specific personality. Nobodyβs going to be admiring the set design when they watch this. Still, you appreciate the effort made by the production team to make it feel real.Β
The lights facing you are blinding and you wince when you accidentally look right into one. Good incentive to not look that way, you suppose.Β
San sits on the edge of the bed. βYou get used to it,β he says, nodding towards the lights.Β
You nod as well, placing a hand above your heart, willing it to stop racing.Β
Noticing this, San takes your hand and guides you to sit down next to him. You do feel a bit better now that youβre sitting. You keep your eyes down to avoid burning your retinas, and turn your head slightly towards him. He shifts a little closer, positioning his body so heβs facing you.Β
βNervous?β He asks rhetorically, knowing full well that you are. Heβs still holding your hand, playing with each of your fingers one by one.Β
βObvious?β You reply, managing to laugh at yourself, despite your nerves.Β
San grins, his eyes turning into crescents, and that dimple in his cheek reappearing. βOnly a little bit. But, Iβve seen worse.βΒ
You hum in response. Being reminded of his experience, leaps and bounds ahead of yours, does nothing to help your anxiety. You just hope you can live up to the fantasy version of your own self. Thatβs the version of you he invited.Β
Whereβs Britney when you need her? Β
You push your hair back, a minute attempt to self-soothe in some way. You only realize halfway through the action that Rina probably just clutched her pearls somewhere past the lights, cursing you for messing up her work. Oh, well. According to what youβve seen and the information youβve gathered, your hairβs gonna be plenty messed up anyway.Β
The room is starting to become a lot less crowded. Just like Hongjoong had said, only the essential people stay on set to make sure everything goes smoothly and safely. Everyone else becomes fading background noise, filtering out into the hallway you first came in from.Β
But less distractions means you notice the man right next to you even more.Β
You can feel Sanβs eyes on you.Β
Itβs not an uncomfortable feeling, quite the opposite actually. The weight of it is light, soft around the edges as he appreciates how he managed to practically will you onto this set with him. Youβd been sure you may be insecure around him because of his almost unnatural beauty, butβ¦ actually, having his eyes on you right now makes you a bit more confident. Heβs not looking at anyone else but you. Not just looking, but admiring.Β
His gaze drifts down, greedily drinking in the sight of your collarbone and legs β the only skin youβre revealing at the moment. If the crew would just hurry up, heβll be able to see more.Β
Fortunately, heβs never been one to wait to get what he wants. Especially not in this industry. And right now, he wants you.Β
βI meant it, by the way,β he says quietly, βyouβre beautiful.βΒ
Without any water to choke on, or an interruption from the director, you simply look up at him, finally meeting his eyes. Thereβs no trace of irony anywhere. Not in what he said, and not hidden somewhere within his features. The genuinity, and the doubling-down of the compliment takes you aback.Β
βThank youβ¦ youβre quite beautiful yourself.β You compliment him back, shifting how youβre sitting to face him as well.Β
By now, your knee is touching his. Even this small amount of contact between you makes your shoulders tense again. Youβre not sure why, but you just want to melt into him already. Perhaps due to the undeniable attraction you feel towards him.Β
Maybe itβs the insane sexual tension between you both, that very well could be the root cause as well.Β
You remember how real his scenes lookβ¦ this must be how the chemistry is kindled. Starting before the cameras capture anything, it makes it all seem less like a show. And you know what? Until the director yells βcutβ, youβre more than willing to match that energy.
His hand moves from yours to rest on your thigh, slowly, like heβs silently asking for permission to continue. When you donβt flinch or push him away, he hikes up your skirt just an inch or two higher, exposing more of your skin. The light ghost of his touch makes you freeze in place. Itβs already dizzying enough to have him in such close proximity, and now adding in the electricity of his touch, itβs a whole other level. And this, you assume, is just the warmup. Getting you used to the feeling of his hands on you. Itβs nice that it doesnβt feel wrong.Β
The lighting crew dims one of the lights and one of them loudly asks the director if it looks good on camera. Distracted, you turn back to look their way again, but San gently cups your face with his hand, making you face him instead.Β
He hums, looking down between your still-clothed bodies. His other hand dips under the hem of your skirt, and your breath hitches. Worrying too much about the crew still, you look back to see if this is alright to do before the cameras start rolling.Β
βDonβt look at the camera, kitten,β San purrs, βI believe that was rule number five.βΒ
βOh, shut up,β you mumble without any real bite to your words.Β
That smile of his returns, and the energy between you becomes even more charged. The moment right before someone gives in after holding back for too long.Β
San never looks anywhere else, entirely focused on you. It doesn't matter to him that thereβs about twenty people still in the same room, all witnessing this βwarm-upβ unfold. It barely fazes him. Heβs experienced in this setting, way more used to it than you are. You just have to roll with it.Β
His hand on your face drops back down to the mattress as his wrist turns, and you inhale sharply when he lightly drags his fingers through your wet folds. He hums again, clearly satisfied.Β
βWhatβs got you this wet already, kitten?βΒ
Your lips part to answer, but he finds your clit before you can speak. This time, you gasp quietly before you can stop yourself. Once again, you glance over at the crew, wondering if anyone is watching the two of you. You canβt see very well because of the lights and the various equipment in the way, but several of the crew and team are.Β
San smirks, pressing the pads of his fingers harder against your clit. βYou like the attention?β He asks, following your gaze. βItβs different from your little camshow isnβt it? Now the audience is only a few feet awayβ¦βΒ
His fingers begin to move in small circles, occasionally dipping further down to collect your wetness before bringing it back up to your clit.Β
βSanββ you breathe, catching his wrist in a semi-firm grip. Not to move it away, but just to hold onto something. Jesus, the shoot hasnβt even officially started yet, but youβre about to beg them to hurry up so it can.Β
San just moves closer to you, his eyes greedily drinking in your cute expression. His voice is quieter, so only you can hear him. βAlready thought about all the ways Iβm gonna make this pretty cunt cum for me. βM gonna make you feel so good.βΒ
Another promise.Β
A shiver runs down your spine, and thatβs the moment the crew decides that theyβre ready to shoot.Β
San pulls away like nothing happened, even smoothing down your skirt for you. You force yourself to breathe through your nose, steadying your pulse. You quickly look down, checking to see if your top is still on straight.Β Β
Director Choi walks up to you both for final notes. βAlright, no script so weβre mostly gonna follow your lead, just let us know when one of you needs a quick break. All three cameras are going to be rolling, and one handheld. You remember all the rules?β He looks over to you.Β
You nod quickly, unable to meet his eye right now. The back of your hand lifts to your cheek to check how hot itβs gotten β as if you need additional confirmation. You hope you didnβt smudge your makeup or wipe some of it off by accident, but you imagine that if it shows up on camera, theyβll stop to fix it.Β
βOkay, then weβre ready to go.βΒ
San thanks him as he walks off, turning his attention back onto you. Your gaze has dropped down to your lap, breaths kind of erratic from the little show you and him just put on, and from nerves. But you manage to pull yourself together, externally at least. All you really have to do now is look pretty for the camera. You can do that. Except for the live audience, this isnβt much different to a camshow, really.Β
And arenβt you here for your fans anyway? Sure, you also wanted the opportunity and experience, but itβs also for your fans. The ones who supported you enough to even get noticed by Afterdark and San in the first place. You imagine theyβll make up at least half of the view count whenever this video drops. Youβre performing for them. Not for the strangers in the room.Β
Once that clicks for you, all your anxiety melts away, freeing you to finally justβ¦ enjoy this. Why not? You deserve it.Β
Plus, youβre quite eager to pick up right where you and San left off just moments ago β and it seems that San is too.Β
His gaze becomes heavier, darker as he shifts into his on-screen persona.Β
βCβmere, kitten, want you on my lap to start.β He says, moving back on the bed a little more and gently pulling you towards him.Β
You straddle his legs, slow to sit down fully. Now slightly above and closer than before, you canβt look anywhere else but at him. His hands slowly trail up your thighs again, watching you the whole time. You stop breathing when his fingertips tease the hem of your skirt again. He can probably feel through those dress pants heβs in how wet you are. Equally though, you can feel how hard heβs getting.Β
Subtly, you grind your hips down onto him. The immediate pleasure of the friction against your bare pussy makes your eyes roll back. One of his hands sneaks to your hip, gripping it tightly, and you meet his eyes again.Β
βItβs just you and me,β he says quietly, breath fanning across your cheek.Β
You nod, eyes fluttering closed again as you grind into him once more. βOkayβ¦βΒ
Through your pleasurable hazy fog, you faintly hear someone yell, βAction!β.Β
And San stops holding back.Β
The hand on your hip pushes you back and pulls you in, encouraging you to keep grinding on him β and to not stop anytime soon. His other hand moves to your hair, keeping your face close to his as he finally kisses you. His lips are pleasantly soft, and he tastes like peppermint. You hope you do too, you probably brushed your teeth at least four times before the driver showed up outside your apartment building. San seems to have no complaints as he moans quietly, his hand tightens in your hair.Β
Your whole body feels electric, every touch amplified by a thousand. He makes out with you slow and deep, savouring the taste of you, and groans into your mouth with each roll of your hips.Β
San tilts your chin up to kiss your neck, hiding his face from the camera. βNever answered my question,β he whispers, barely audible so his voice doesnβt get picked up by any of the overhead microphones.Β
You disguise your response as a moan, βHm?βΒ
He licks a small stripe up your neck, right up to your ear and looks down between you. You follow his gaze, only to find a wet patch staining his pants already.Β
Ah.Β
His question from mere minutes ago: Whatβs got you this wet already?Β
βSo wet for me,β he murmurs, a bit louder. Itβs alright if the microphones pick that up. βWonder whyβ¦βΒ
Itβs the knowing smirk that does it. You move to undress him first, intriguing him. He didnβt expect you to be so bold right out of the gate. But, you have an on-screen persona of your own. Now both of your characters are out to play.Β
In your dwindling patience, you come close to just ripping the shirt off when you fumble with one of the buttons. San finds your lips again as you push the offending fabric off of him, eager to explore his newly exposed body. But youβre next.Β
Both of his hands lift up your shirt until it comes off over your head, forcing you two to break apart for a moment. Neither of you wait to make up for that lost time. You drape your arms around his shoulders, one of your hands lightly tugging at the roots of his hair. At first, your whole body erupts in goosebumps from the cold air now hitting your upper body as well, and not just your arms, but you canβt blame your reaction entirely on the temperature.Β
San must notice how your shoulders hunch a little and how you press further into him, because he is quick to warm you up.Β
One arm around your waist, he pulls you closer, chests touching. The first brush of your peaked nipples against his skin makes you gasp into his mouth. He nips at your bottom lip, distracting you while his hand moves from the back of your head, down to one of your breasts. His thumb flicks over the sensitive bud there and you have to duck your head down to catch your breath for a second. You grind down onto him again, adding to your arousal tenfold.Β
Refusing to prolong this any longer, San suddenly flips you onto the bed, underneath him. His hand returns between your legs, fingers shallowly dipping into your entrance and circling your clit. He keeps just out of your reach, his lips so frustratingly close to yours. You glance down to watch him. The visual of his hand disappearing underneath your skirt, the veins in his arm beginning to rise and pop, and the heat of his body against yours is all starting to add up.Β
You tug at your own skirt, looking up at him with doe eyes. He nods twice, understanding. In no time at all, your skirt is unzipped and pulled down your legs, discarded somewhere onto the floor.Β
Now fully exposed, San pauses.Β
The tempo of the scene slows abruptly as he takes his time to look at your body, laying so prettily beneath him. He looks at your body like heβs deciding where to start first, with too many enticing options. You drag your hands down his chest, lightly scratching him and making him shiver in the process. This, you realize, is how he makes every scene feel legit. He takes his time to admire his partner, make them feel admired and wanted. You have to admit, it does work its magic. Not just for the audience, but for you as well.Β
He catches both of your wrists, bringing your hands together to kiss them both before guiding them down above your head.Β
βKeep them here,β he murmurs, kissing you once more.Β
You barely have time to enjoy or savor the taste of him again before he moves to kiss your neck. Eyes closing, you sigh into the feeling, wanting to commit this to memory. He doesnβt stay in one place for long, moving down to kiss your chest next. Soft, wet warmth once again wraps around your nipple and you arch your back to try and get more of it. You twist your hands in the sheets above you, keeping them anchored there just like he instructed.Β
San then moves further down, ghosting his lips past your stomach. You part your legs to accommodate him, and he kneels on the floor, gently pushing your legs further apart. He drags this out, just to torture you, you think. His intentions and what heβs about to do are clear, but heβs a professional at driving his partners crazy. The kisses turn to licks, right next to your labia. So tantalizingly close.Β
If your eyes were open, youβd see that heβs been watching you the entire time, trying to pace himself as best he can. Youβre actually lucky thereβs a job to do here because if it was just the two of you alone, he doesnβt think heβd be holding himself back from just taking what he wants.Β
To him, this is all just a chance for him to prove himself to you. To him, youβre the star. And heβs going to make sure you leave this set more than satisfied. Wanting for nothing.Β
But heβs not going to start until you beg him to.Β
His breath fans across your wet lower lips and your hands find his hair again, trying to push his mouth where you need him. You hear him laugh, exhaling through his nose before moving your hands away.Β
βThought I told you to keep your hands up there, kitten,β he reminds you, with a slight warning edge to his voice.Β
Oh, shit, you realize all too late. The last video flashes through your mind, and he feels you tense up. He kisses your hipbone to calm you down.Β
βBe a good girl and keep them above your head,β he repeats his previous order.Β
You nod quickly, βIβm sorryββ but he cuts you off by licking a thick wet stripe through your folds. Your breath hitches, and your hands stay cemented to the sheets, to hold on for dear life.Β
When he repeats the action, the tip of his tongue flicks at your clit, making you see stars already.Β
βOh my godβ¦β you moan, eyes fluttering shut again.Β
Your hands itch to move back down to his hair, wanting to pull him closer and to push him away. You want to touch him again, but the fear of him reenacting the βFantasyβ video keeps you frozen.Β
As expected, his mouth is just as perfect as the rest of him. The softness of his lips against your core only stokes the dull heat in your lower stomach. He alternates between focusing more on your clit, and dipping his tongue into your entrance. The most addicting part is that heβs moaning while he eats you out, like the taste of you is getting him off. You hope he lets you return the favor.Β
He readjusts his hands on your thighs when they threaten to close around his head, opting to push them back towards your chest. Your toes curl as he sucks your clit hard, and you canβt help the high-pitched sound that escapes your mouth. He does it again, and again, getting you louder each time.Β
βLook at me, baby,β he breathes, his nose brushing up against your sensitive clit as he speaks.Β
You whimper as you lift your head up, resting on your elbows to not strain your neck. He meets your eyes for just a second before shoving his tongue into your hole, rubbing his nose against your clit again. You cry out, throwing your head back as the pleasure increases and squirm in his strong grip. Legs shaking and breath uneven, itβs clear that youβre close. Now youβll get to see what he has planned for you. The two boxes you checked off, βRoughβ, and βGentleβ come back to haunt you.Β
A moan cuts you off as you try to warn him that youβre close, but he can tell without needing to hear you say it. Heβs been the cause of enough female orgasms to see the warning signs of one approaching. Two of his fingers suddenly dip into you as he sucks on your clit, hooking deep inside and prodding your g-spot over and over again.Β
His voice is rough and gravelly against your pussy, βCum for me, baby. Wanna taste it.βΒ
A bolt of electricity runs through you as you cum, shaking and moaning while it gradually subsides. The heat in your lower stomach cools off but stays simmering now, waiting to be rekindled again. You whimper, raising your head back up to look at him. Heβs in his own world between your legs, gently licking your pussy and your inner thighs clean. Your core clenches around his fingers when he slowly starts to drag them out, and he smirks. He lowers your legs back down, kissing your knee and doing a quick check to make sure youβre okay to continue.Β
You answer that check by sitting up and pulling him towards you, kissing him even more hungrily than before. He hasnβt even wiped his mouth yet, but you donβt care. Without breaking the kiss, he follows you back down onto the bed, sucking on your tongue and wrapping a hand around your throat. Not tight enough to restrict airflow, but just enough to make your head feel light. He grinds his still-clothed erection into you, and the friction makes your head spin. You donβt know if youβre allowed to move your hands or not, but you just want to touch him so badly. You want to grip his length, make him feel just as good, taste him too.Β
For now, you just roll your hips up into his, moaning into his mouth.Β
βWant itβ¦want you,β you mumble, parting from his lips for just a second to tell him that.Β
San hums, lazily kissing your jaw. βWhat do you want, kitten? Be specific.βΒ
You groan inwardly, but you know he has to prolong this a little. Damnβ¦ for a while, you forgot about the reason youβre currently underneath him. You sneak a glance over to your left, seeing where the set ceiling abruptly stops and opens up to the industrial interior of the Afterdark building. He notices your focus straying, and heβs quick to act.Β
βTell me,β San redirects you, blocking your view by kissing the left side of your neck and distracting you from everything else by keeping his hard-on pressed right up against your bare pussy. His voice is firmer. A small warning and reminder of rule number five.Β
You take a deep breath before you voice what you want, βWanna suck your cockβ¦ please, sir.βΒ
Itβs the βsirβ that nearly kills him. You really have done your research, havenβt you? You know thatβs what he likes to be called, especially when his scene partners are feeling extra submissive to him. Are you feeling that way already? Maybe you just really want to do this for him. San studies you for a second, confirming the latter. He can see how much you actually mean it by the way you look up at him, pleading with your eyes.Β
And who is he to deny you? Especially when you ask so nicely. Plus, heβs been wanting to feel your mouth wrap around his cock since he watched your livestream.Β
βYeah?β He asks, biting the space where your neck meets your shoulder and pressing up against you again.Β
You give him your best doe-eyed look, really tapping into your innocent act. βYes, sir.βΒ
San helps you sit upright again and stands at the foot of the bed, starting to undo his belt. Wanting to be an active participant, you lean forward, dragging your lips down and across his abs, occasionally licking at his soft, honeyed skin. His belt hits the floor, and your hands are quick to do the rest. Itβs a little hard to get the zipper down, but you manage it, successfully removing his pants. Youβre just about to deal with his underwear next, but he grabs your wrist, pulling you towards him. You stumble a little as you find your footing on the floor, and let him lead you over to a chair against the set wall. Itβs a better angle for the cameras, you assume. For him, he just wants to watch you do this properly. He wants nothing to obstruct his view, or the cameraβs.Β
San pushes his hair back as you drag the final piece of clothing away from his body. You avert your eyes until the very last second, tossing the garment off to the side to join the sad little pile of discarded clothes on the floor. Now you take your time, pressing a kiss to his knee, slowly rising up onto yours the further up you move. You hear his breath shift, and you finally glance up to face his cock.Β
Somehow, itβs bigger than it looks on camera.Β
You have no idea how thatβs possible β you know about the fish eye lenses and tricks the porn industry will use to make someoneβs dick look bigger than it is, but right now, youβre presented with the exact opposite. Itβs larger in real life. This, you were not expecting, but it is such a pleasant and welcome surprise. And of course, itβs just as pretty as the rest of him.Β Β
Both of these things combined only make you want to put your mouth on it even more.Β
When you delicately wrap your hand around it, he hisses at the long-awaited contact. A hand tangles into your hair, not pulling you towards him, just resting there for now. San leans back against the chair, his toned body a feast for the cameras and for you. You remind yourself not to rush, and to savor this.Β
Wanting to give him a taste of his own medicine, you tease him a little by ghosting your lips up his length, watching him shiver and bite his lip. You kiss the tip, and linger there for a second, acting like youβre about to put him in your mouth, only to move away, kissing his hipbone next and stroking him with your hand.Β
His grip tightens in your hair. Knowing he wants you to hurry up, you let go of him for a moment to spit in your hand before quickly returning to it. He groans a bit louder, head falling back a little as you gently twist your wrist, squeezing at the base of his cock.Β
Finally, you lick him from the base to the head before wrapping your lips around him. His other hand balls up into a fist, but thatβs the only reaction he gives away for now. You relax your jaw as much as you can, trying to accommodate his size before sinking down lower. You can taste his pre-cum in the back of your throat, coating your tongue.Β
If you were annoyed with his apparent perfection before, youβre pissed now. How does he also taste good too?Β
As if to get back at him somehow, you wrap your lips tighter around his cock and suck hard, which earns you a choked moan from him. You hum around him, amused and pleased with yourself. His hand shakes slightly as he pushes your hair back, the other one in your hair starting to guide you even further down. The tip hits the back of your throat and you gag on it, forcing yourself to relax and remember to breathe through your nose.Β
βFuck, babyβ¦so good,β He groans, starting to struggle to keep his eyes open.Β
The visual of you choking on his cock is better than he couldβve ever imagined it to be. You donβt try to fight against him when he pushes you down or pulls you back up, simply letting him use your throat as he wishes. Even though youβre gagging and your eyes are watering, you donβt try to pull off. Not even when he shoves you down, making you fit his entire length into your throat, and holds you there for ten seconds. The longest ten seconds of your life. Your nails dig into your thighs, creating angry red crescent-shaped indents in your skin. His cock twitches in your throat and you whimper, keeping your gag reflex at bay. When the ten seconds are up, he lets you pull off of him completely to catch your breath.Β
You cough into your shoulder, one of your hands wrapping around him again to make sure he still feels good. San can't help but praise you, leaning down to kiss your forehead, cupping your face with his hand to make you look at him. Itβs a subtle check-in moment. Nothing between you is said out loud, but he searches your face for any signs of discomfort or stress of any kind. Heβs rather relieved to find none, only your glossy eyes staring back at him, lips parted and breath heavier than before. Ready to go again or continue on.Β
Whatever he wants.Β
San shivers as you gently twist your wrist again, returning your lips to the head of his dick, kitten-licking the pre-cum that still leaks out there. You hope heβll cum in your mouth. A rare hope, as youβve never quite enjoyed the taste of it before, but with his track record so far, youβre willing to bet youβll enjoy it this time. To encourage this dream to happen, you spit onto the head of his cock twice, collecting some of it with your hand already around his length, and the rest with your mouth, swirling your tongue around the tip.Β
You hear soft footsteps behind you, and naturally, your first instinct is to whip around to see who it is. Luckily, your conscience kicks in, reminding you of where you are, and youβre able to stop yourself before you can even move an inch. Itβs probably one of the crew leaving the set, you figure. But it sounds close by.Β
As if to prove you right, soon thereβs a figure or a shadow looming just out of your peripheral vision on your left, holding something. To combat every urge within you to turn around, you close your eyes and steal another kiss from San, who lazily kisses you back. He doesnβt seem to mind that your lips are covered in spit and pre-cum. Not one bit. His groans have increased the more you stroke his cock, one of his hands grips the arm of the chair in an attempt to ground himself. Harder, faster, your wrist begins to burn from exertion, but determination keeps it going. Youβll get a damn brace if you need to.Β
βGodββ he grunts, looking down at your hand.Β
βWant you to cum too,β you say, looking up at him, almost pleading.Β
Sanβs eyes squeeze shut for just a moment, a full body shudder wracking through him before he is able to compose himself again.Β
βAnd where do you want me to cum, kitten?β He asks, his volume raising slightly, caressing your cheek.Β
βIn my mouth, sir.β You reply, also loud enough for the microphones to pick up.Β
He all but shoves you down. You barely have time to make sure your teeth arenβt grazing his dick with every bob of your head as his hand returns to your hair, guiding your movements once again. This time, with just a fraction less of his notorious self control. Youβre able to keep up easily, sucking harder whenever youβre closer to the head of it, and using your tongue as much as you can.Β
San swears under his breath, hissing at your previously unknown skill level. It takes every ounce of composure to not fuck your throat the way he wants to. Heβd be so mean to you if youβd let him. He wouldnβt have kept himself down your throat for ten measly seconds, it wouldβve been until you tried to push yourself off, desperate to breathe again. That wouldβve been heavenly, to feel your throat constrict around his cock, in search of air. But not for the first scene together.Β
If thereβs a next time, maybe thatβs when heβll let go just a little more. Show that side of him and see how you cope with it. For now though, heβs content to just enjoy the sight of you taking him in your mouth, wanting to make him cum. And youβre damn near close to achieving that.Β
He ignores the cameraman standing barely two feet from you, and leans back again, relaxing his body as his dick twitches incessantly in your mouth. Every time his tip hits the back of your throat, sparks of electricity shoot up his spine.Β
βFuckβ¦ ah, fuck, Iβm gonna cumβ¦ mmfββ San moans, head tilting back against the chair.Β
You donβt change anything about what youβre doing, just continuing until finally, he releases into your mouth. Just like you wanted him to. And itβs just as you predicted. The taste of it makes you want him to cum in your mouth again and again, surprisingly pleasant. Slightly bitter, yes, but not overly so. You swallow around him, not pulling off just yet. You wonβt until you suck him dry, until he pushes you off from overstimulation. Maybe subconsciously, itβs because you know he loves to overstimulate his scene partners β a subtle payback for all of them. You try to hide your grin as you finally release him. Not a single drop wasted. You swallowed everything.Β
San looks down at you through half-lidded eyes, fighting to keep his chest rising and falling in a steadier rhythm. You lick your lips just for good measure, and he snaps.Β
His hands return to your face and the back of your head, pulling you towards him to kiss you deeply. You moan into his mouth as his tongue slips into yours, not caring in the slightest that can taste himself. As you straighten up on your knees, you can feel how wet you still are, and you canβt help but be a little surprised. Youβve never gotten wet from sucking dick before. If he finds out, itβll go right to his ego, no doubt.Β
But before he can, thereβs an abrupt, loud clacking sound to your left, and at first, you think someone must have dropped something. San makes a quiet, irritated sound before pulling away, glancing towards the director. The cameraman right next to you moves away, going back over towards the others and adjusting something on his camera. You feel slow to catch up on whatβs happening, looking back up at San for help.Β
βWeβre breaking for a second,β he explains, still out of breath.Β
Ah.Β
βAre you alright?β You ask him, without thinking. Youβre not even sure why you asked that.Β
San blinks, processing your question as well before nodding once, βYeahβ¦ yeah, Iβm good.βΒ
Thereβs a fleeting moment between you that you canβt describe. Something deeper than the scene now that youβre out of it. Itβs the way heβs looking at you, void of any facade or persona meant for the cameras. Almost like heβs curious about something.Β
No one ever really asks him if heβs alright.Β
Just as quickly as the moment appears, itβs gone. You hear a flurry of movement and murmured conversations on your left as you sink back onto your heels, processing everything. Your eyes close as you try to focus on your breathing now that nothing is blocking your throat, deep inhales and slow exhales.Β Β
βYou okay?β San asks as well, eyebrows furrowing in what appears to be genuine concern.Β
ββM okayβ¦ honest.β You nod as you speak to emphasize that youβre truly alright. One more prolonged exhale, and you roll your shoulders back, heart-rate decelerating back to its default speed. One of your hands reaches up to massage your aching jaw.Β
Opening your eyes again, you accidentally make eye contact directly to his cock, still right in front of your face. Itβs laying against his stomach, still slightly twitching, butβ¦ not softening. At least not as much as youβd expect it to. Surely, he canβt still be hard after coming. However, at this point, you wouldnβt put it past him to have a practically nonexistent refractory period. Might as well tack it onto the list of things he has been blessed with in life.Β
San runs a hand through his hair, looking over towards someone who must be talking to him. You watch his eyes follow them until you see for yourself who it is β one of the assistants that had been in his little circle when he first walked out of his dressing room. He hands him a robe, and quickly walks off. You feel a small nudge at your shoulder and find one of the other assistants β the one that had handed you the blanket earlier β extending a robe towards you. You take it gladly, your body heat crashing down again now that nothing is happening, and the frigid air conditioning reminding you why you asked for a blanket in the first place. He also gives you a water bottle with a straw poked through the plastic cap, and you drink it down gratefully.Β
Director Choi calls over Youngmi and Rina, and theyβre quickly by your side, touching up your hair and makeup. You scoot back a little on the floor, giving San some space as his own team descends around him. Still, through the quiet rush of activity separating the two of you, your eyes stay glued to him.Β
Once the four hair and makeup girls leave, you hear Hongjoong from somewhere behind you. You both look towards his voice, standing near the director. A young woman you havenβt seen milling around the set before stands right next to him, also in a short silk robe almost identical to yours from what you can see of it past the lights. Your chest burns. Sheβs gorgeous, and seems to only get prettier the more you look at her. She looks between Hongjoong and San expectantly, as if waiting for a regular cue. Totally relaxed. You look back down at your hands in your lap, toying with the hem of your robe. Itβs obvious what sheβs there for. You wonder if sheβs been watching the whole time as well.Β
But San is quick to rid you of any worries.Β
Actually, he seems a little annoyed as he waves Hongjoong and the woman off, before turning his attention back to you. He helps you stand up, slowly to ensure you wonβt get dizzy, and leads you back over to sit on the foot of the bed. Back where you started, in your own little bubble together in front of the lights and the cameras.Β Β
Once settled again, San tilts your head up, his pointer finger under your chin, and holds it there, effectively disrupting your train of thought. He can almost see the self-doubt threatening to cloud your mind, even if you try to hide it behind your on-camera mask. He simply wonβt have it. His other hand cups your cheek, making sure you donβt try to look anywhere but at him right now.Β
ββM still hard for you, kitten,β he says quietly, just for you. He moves closer, his thumb running over your bottom lip. βMade me feel so fucking goodβ¦ doing so wellβ¦βΒ
You canβt help but blush at his praise. Heβs so attentive, itβs a little shocking. You expected him to be, due to the videos you watched, but off-camera as well?Β
To thank him, you wrap your lips around his thumb, sucking on it lightly, maintaining eye contact with him the whole time. You want him to snap again. To just fuck you stupid already, to not wait for the production team to be ready. God, you just want to stop thinking and overthinking. You lean into the hand holding your cheek, humming at the comfort it provides.Β
One of your hands wanders between you, trailing up his thigh. You want to feel it for yourself, even though the robe does little to conceal the truth in his statement. Nevertheless, your confidence is rekindled once more when you feel him through the silk, hard and ready for you. He hisses at the contact, resting his forehead against yours for a moment or two before straightening again. A low groan from him makes your thighs clench together.Β
βSorry, sir,β you whisper, grinning mischievously now that youβre the one teasing him.Β Β
San laughs once, breathy and short.Β
βYou really have done your research on me, huh?β He smirks, watching you slowly move his robe aside to touch him properly. He tenses a little at the initial contact, but gradually relaxes again as his body gets used to it.Β
You shrug, playing it cool. βWanted to see what I was getting myself into,β the corners of your mouth twitch as you slowly stroke his cock, watching for his reactions.Β
βAndββ he clears his throat before continuing, βwhat do you think so far?βΒ
Your eyes flicker up to meet his, and youβre taken aback again by his genuineness. Heβs not just asking to ask or to boost a sky-high ego, he really does want to know. Still, you want to keep him intrigued. Maybe you even want him to try and prove himself to you a bit.Β Β
βWellβ¦ Iβm still wet for you,β you admit, casting your eyes down towards your lap. βBut I think Iβll give you a final verdict later.βΒ Β
San hums, remembering the taste of you, and how wet you were for him to start. His eyes trail downwards, towards your chest, which is slowly becoming more and more revealed as your robe loosens.Β Β Β Β Β
βDeal,β he whispers, slowly leaning in to kiss you.Β
Before he can though, you squeeze his member a little harder, your thumb circling the tip, making his mind nearly go blank. San shudders and leans back on his hands, his robe also loosening little by little, revealing his chest and the top of his abs to your hungry eyes again. He steals a quick glance over to the crew, before just taking matters into his own hands.Β
As soon as his robe comes off, he tosses it in the cameraβs direction. A rather obvious way of telling everyone the break is over. Director Choi quickly stands from his chair, shooing away a production assistant and waving another one over to collect the robes. You take yours off as well, tossing it onto his, and San eases you down onto your back, kissing you just as deeply as before.Β
You shiver, finally underneath him once more. The promise of whatβs to come thunders through your mind. He slots his knee in between your legs, keeping you open for him. You whine into his mouth when that knee raises slightly, pressing against your pussy. You can almost hear his smirk, confirming that you are indeed still wet for him.Β
Well, he wonβt make you wait any longer.Β
And just in time too, because someone over on the left shouts, βAction!β. You feel kind of bad for stressing out the crew this much, but you canβt dwell on those guilty feelings when San is rubbing your clit again.
βFuckβ¦ pleaseβ¦β you whimper, hips grinding up in search of something else.Β Β
San moans, working himself up as he feels your pussy slicking all over his knee.Β Β
βAre they gonna stop us again?β You ask, whispering in his ear.Β
βThey better fucking not,β San breathes, pressing one more kiss to your cheek before pushing himself up, spreading your legs further apart so he can kneel between them.Β
You prop yourself up on your elbows again, intent on watching. You clench around nothing as he grips himself, angling his dick down towards your pussy. Every muscle in your body locks in anticipation and impatience. Your brain goes haywire just at the sight of his cock near where you need him most, knowing heβll stretch you out, and knowing that you probably wonβt last too long with his size. Hopefully, you wonβt cum as soon as he bottoms out.Β
San presses the tip to your hole, and you hold your breath. Itβs so big, but youβre ready. Youβre definitely wet enough to help get him inside without any help from spit or lube. Nevertheless, he spits right on your clit, pausing to make you feel it drip down through your folds. He taps the head of his cock against your clit a couple times, greedily watching your reactions.Β
And much to your despair, he doesnβt push inside just yet. Instead, he drags his cock up and down your pussy. Slowly. Forcing you to feel every inch of it, just not where you need it. Your clit is so sensitive, every time he rubs up against it, you canβt help but whine pathetically.Β
San hums, mocking you. βHm? Whatβs wrong, kitten?βΒ
βPlease fuck me already,β you exhale, whimpering at yet another tap of his cock against your clit.Β
βLouder,β he instructs, not just to make you beg for it again, but also so the microphones pick it up. Youβd forgotten all about them again, to be honest. βAsk me properly.βΒ
Another shiver runs through you, and you gasp when you feel the head of his cock return to your entrance. Just barely enough so you can feel itβs there. But itβs enough motivation. You spread your legs further apart to convince him, holding them up and back by hooking your arms around your knees. Fully exposed to his eyes, open and ready to be filled.Β
βPlease, sir, please fuck me. Want it so baββΒ
Your voice is cut off by a choked noise as he finally pushes into you. Quickly, you look down, watching him breach you. All of your air is punched out of you as he stretches you out, sinking deeper and deeper, inch by inch. He takes over the task of keeping your legs apart, and he stills for a second to give your body time to adjust to him. Heβs just barely halfway in, and your brain already feels like mush.Β
Maybe itβs a good thing because the same cameraman from before comes back, aiming the camera right at you two. Your body is so tense from the intrusion that you canβt look towards him, even by accident.
San swears under his breath, watching his cock disappearing into you as well.Β
βSo fucking tightβ¦ god, babyβ¦β he grunts, adjusting his knees slightly closer to your ass so he can feed you more of his length.Β
One of his hands tilts your chin up again, silently telling you to hold eye contact with him. His eyes flicker down only for a split second.Β
Then he shoves the rest of his cock inside.Β
A mix of a gasp and a yelp punches its way out of you. Your whole body is like a livewire. Alert, teetering on an electric edge. Your hands grip the sheets next to you, biting your lip. You can feel everything. Every inch, every vein dragging against your walls when he slowly pulls it back again. You both crave and dread the next time he pushes in, knowing itβs going to feel so overwhelmingly good.Β
The realization hits you like a ton of bricks. Youβre close to coming already.Β
Wide-eyed, all you can do is stare up at him as he rolls his hips into yours. Your walls flutter around him, legs already beginning to shake. Thereβs no hiding it anymore.Β
Amused, San leans down, pushing your legs back even more, deepening the stretch. He groans as your pussy contracts around him tight, wanting more.Β
βWhat, kitten? Already?β San smirks, a windfall of pride rushing through him. As if he needed any more validation for how good at this he is.
Your face burns, having been found out.Β
The next roll of his hips is sinfully languid, taking his time. Then, he really betrays you. One of his hands leaves the back of your thigh and he uses his thumb to rub your clit. You yelp, body buzzing from pleasure, and he takes this time to start fucking you properly, thrusting into you in a steady rhythm.Β
βMm, thatβs it,β he says, twisting his wrist so he can rub your clit with two fingers instead. βLet me feel it.βΒ
Youβre starting to think all you need in order to cum is for him to tell you to do it. Your second orgasm of the evening is a bit stronger than the first one because of the addition of penetration. It makes you feel very floaty once it hits, clenching around his cock in order to prolong it.Β
Unlike last time, he gives you no recovery period. The second he sees your eyes refocus, heβs fucking into you again. Like he never stopped. Your hands grip his shoulders, knowing youβre in for it. The tags for this future video flash through your mind, overstimulation being one. You lay flat on your back now, unable to keep holding yourself up as another strong wave of pleasure crashes into you. A third orgasm building up again.Β
His fingers on your clit press down harder, making tight circles over the sensitive bud. He only relents for a second, just to hook your legs over his shoulders, letting him get even deeper inside of you. Your eyes roll back for a moment, whining at the feeling. Your hands try to push at his chest, to make him stop, to make him straighten up, youβre not entirely sure yourself.Β
Thereβs no energy behind your actions, but San still subtly checks in. βFeel good, kitten?βΒ
You choke on another moan, his cock getting dangerously close to hitting your g-spot. βMm- Iβmβ good, feels s-so good.βΒ
βYeah? You liked coming on my cock?βΒ
βYesβ¦βΒ
βYes, what?β San punctuates his question by ramming into you hard, unexpectedly.Β
Youβre quick to correct yourself, βY-yes, sir!β
βThere you go,β he brushes some hair away from your face, βmy good girl.βΒ
Your body melts at the praise, replaying it over and over again as the feeling builds up higher and higher. You donβt realize until San winces that your nails started to dig into his chest, leaving some red scratch marks in your wake. As soon as you see that, you instantly take your hands away, feeling so bad that youβve hurt him unknowingly.Β
But he puts them right back where they were.Β
And he leans down to your neck to return the favor, biting and sucking the skin there to create dark red and purple bruises wherever he can. His thrusts become more powerful, angling down into you to make you see stars. The simmering heat in your stomach is stoked with each direct hit to your g-spot. Itβs getting to be more of a challenge to breathe normally like this.
Especially as your third orgasm begins to crest.Β
ββM comingββ you warn him, but he knows already. He can feel it.Β
He hovers over you, moving his hips precisely and slightly faster. He wants to watch you again. To see you fall apart for him again. Truthfully, he already feels a bit pussy-drunk. Starting to get addicted to the feeling of your warm, wet cunt wrapped so tightly around him, coming for him so prettily. And you donβt disappoint him the third time either.Β
Youβre loud this time, unable to control your volume. The third orgasm hits you like a truck, and it only builds higher and higher instead of gradually diminishing. You cry out, halfway through it. Something feels unfinished about it, and youβre desperate to chase it. Luckily, San knows exactly what you need.Β
He quickly lowers your legs from his shoulders, jumping right into action to catch this. Your legs are held back, like the previous position they were in, and he returns his other hand to your lower stomach, pressing down hard. You can feel him moving inside of you. Your head falls back and you moan loudly, suddenly feeling everything tenfold.Β
The sound is obscene, definitely pornographic. Wet, sloshing sounds, accompanied by your loud cries and moans fill the warehouse-like room of the eighth floor. His cock prods your g-spot every single time, building something insanely powerful that youβve never felt before. You grab his wrist, looking up at him with slight fear in your eyes, but he doesnβt seem concerned. Heβs determined, if anything.Β
βGood girl,β he purrs, so affectionately it makes your brain melt.Β
He adjusts his hand on your stomach just a little further down. At the same time that you feel him rubbing your clit again, he ducks down to suck on one of your nipples, and fireworks explode behind your eyelids. The quadruple stimulation makes you scream.Β
βGonna make a mess for me, kitten? Yeah? Gonna cum all over my cock again?βΒ
You donβt even have time to nod or reply in any way. A strong surge of pleasure smashes into you from all sides, whiting out your vision. Itβs a feeling of release unlike any other that youβve felt before, much harder than any orgasm youβve ever had. He keeps fucking you through it until your pussy forces him out, watching your body shake uncontrollably underneath him, soaking the sheets below you, and his lower body. Now you know damn well what kind of βroughβ youβll be getting from him: overstimulation. Making you cum until you beg him to stop.Β
San growls at the sight. It burns into his brain, and he can already say for certain that heβll be jerking off to the memory of this later tonight and for days to come.Β
Just to prolong it, he taps his heavy cock against your pussy and clit again, enjoying how you try to squirm away from it.Β
Youβre so wet, itβs audible. Every tap is loud, and a thin, stringy mixture of his spit and your slick clings to him for as long as it can whenever he pulls away. You reach for him, not knowing exactly what you want, but knowing you want him closer to you, and he obliges. He leans down over you again, slowly sliding his length between your puffy, wet folds.Β
A familiar, faint voice from the left is ignored totally by you and him, too busy coming down from the most intense high of your life, and him holding you through it.Β Β
An aftershock rattles you from head to toe, and you gasp when you feel it. The intense pleasure you felt gives way to sudden emptiness, and you realize you do not have anything to clench down on anymore. Though his dick is right there, dragging up and down your outer lips, it feels so far away from where you actually want it.Β
Thankfully, sensing your dilemma β and hearing you whine for it β he doesnβt make you wait any longer. In your post-orgasmic haze, he guides you over onto all fours, now facing the foot of the bed. Ever the gentleman, he moves your hair out of your face. However, you imagine itβs so the camera can see your fucked out, dazed expression.Β
His cock slips back inside of you easily, without any resistance, and the two of you groan in unison. In both relief and pleasure.Β Β
That familiar, faint voice comes back. Clearer this time, and closer as well. βSanβ¦ San! Weβre taking another break now.βΒ
San kisses your shoulder blade, barely paying attention. βOkay, have fun,β he brushes the voice off, impatiently.Β
Youβd laugh if you had any coherent thoughts or spare energy left. No, youβre a bit preoccupied at the moment, your body trembling around his cock, and so happy that heβs pushed back into you. Truthfully, you donβt even care if youβre stressing out the crew anymore. All of your thoughts are about San.Β
San smooths a hand up your spine, slowly pushing inch by inch into your soaked hole. He shushes you gently when you whimper, interlacing his fingers with yours when you try to reach back to find his hand to hold.Β Β
βI know, kitten, itβs okay. Just relax.β
Easier said than done.Β
He lightly presses your lower back, signalling you to arch it for him a little more. You nearly regret it when you feel him deeper than before in this position. Your elbows threaten to buckle, body shaking like a leaf. Yet, you still want more. Even though youβre nearing a certain point, wavering between overexertion and exhaustion, you crave more. You want to chase that feeling with him again. Make him glad he asked you to come here. Make him come back for more. So, you grit your teeth and keep yourself from face-planting into the mattress. For now, at least.Β Β
Sanβs powerful pace resumes in no time, stealing every breath from your lungs. Another vague, quiet plea falls from your lips, and in response, he squeezes your hips, pulling them back to meet every thrust. Your throat is raw from all the noise youβre making, and you know youβll have to drink some tea or honey tonight to get your voice back to normal. Not this thin, broken voice you have now. Your lower back aches from staying in this position, but you do your best to ignore it.Β
It helps that his cock is basically in your stomach, that does a lot to distract you from a mere ache in your back. It also helps that your pussy is extra sensitive, coming three times β twice in a row without a break β and squirting for the first time. On camera, no less. Your viewers are going to lose their fucking minds. The image of your donation box on your livestreams, and your Venmo accounts skyrocketing after this video releases is motivation enough for you to want him to make you do it again.Β
Your back arches even more, hips grinding back against his to get more of him somehow.Β
Such a little natural.Β Β Β Β Β
βMmm, there you go. Thatβs it. Keep fucking yourself on my cock, pretty girl.βΒ
You make a noise, halfway between a whine and a moan and do as he says. Your chest grazes the sheets below you, chin buried into the mattress and arms gripping the edge of the bed in front of you.Β
βFuck,β you whimper, a couple of stray tears threatening to fall. βYouβre s-so fucking deep.βΒ
San groans, increasing the pace. You yelp when you feel him smack your ass, and again when he hits it a second and third time. By the time the third strike lands, he doesnβt even give you any time to process the stinging pain heβs left behind before thereβs a new one on the back of your head.Β
Slightly dizzy, it takes you a second to realize youβre upright, on your knees. One hand tangled in your hair, pulling at the roots, and the other rubbing incessant circles on your swollen clit. His chest presses into your back, and he moves your head to face him so he can kiss you again. Mind threatening to wipe completely, you canβt fight to hold back your tears anymore. You shudder violently, and he groans as he feels your body struggle to keep up with him. He knows you can take it, though. Youβre a fighter, he can tell.Β
βDoing so well,β he whispers in your ear, βsuch a good girl for me, baby. Knew you would be. Knew Iβd get this pussy to fall apart on my dick. Thought about it so fucking muchβ¦β
You whine against his mouth, tears wetting his face now as well. The blatant admission that he had thought about you like this before today goes straight over your head.Β
All you hear is his praise. Youβre doing well. Good enough for him, like you were so stressed about being. Nothing else matters to you anymore, now that youβve earned his approval. A proud smile creeps across your face, and he grins at the faraway look in your half-lidded eyes. Youβre so far gone. Completely pleasure-drunk.Β Β
The hand in your hair tightens again and loosens, like itβs an afterthought now. Just something for him to hold onto. To keep you steady, if anything. Warm pressure building and building again in your stomach, you round your back as another shiver wracks its way through your body, making your spine tingle. His hand moves down to hold you by the back of the neck, and he slows his pace just enough to guide you back down onto the bed. This time, totally flat. Your pussy forces him out at this new position, but his other hand is quick to spread one of your ass cheeks apart, cock sliding back inside of you.Β
He doesnβt ease you into his pace anymore. The first brutal thrust makes your eyes roll back, and your jaw falls open. Your nails claw at the bedding, every muscle in your arms straining while you hold onto the fabric for dear life.Β Β Β
Heβs so fucking deep. Impossibly, almost.Β
He may just make you cum like this, without even needing to touch your clit. Heβs making you learn so much about what your body can do when in the right hands. No wonder people are so obsessed with him. Heβs become so in tune with your body so quickly, just by paying explicit attention to you this whole time. It makes you really appreciate his expertise, because he could easily have just used what has worked for other girls in the past. He probably couldβve made you cum like that as well, but he tailors himself for each girl. Adapts for them. For you.Β
And heβs learning you pretty well. Probably read you like a fucking book.Β
Every precisely angled thrust punches a moan out from deep within your chest. Each sound is partly muffled by the bedding, and you try to keep quiet, not wanting to be annoying. You canβt help it, though. Not when it feels this good. Certainly not when another orgasm is building, more rapidly than the others.Β
You squirm under him, toes curling and nails digging into the mattress.Β
βIβ mmfβ! Youβreβ¦ youβre gonna make me cum again,β you have to speak quickly before it hits you.Β
San leans over you, hands planted right next to your shoulders, fucking you harder. βGive it to me, pretty girl. I want every fucking drop.βΒ
Someone dressed in all black stands right in front of you, pointing something towards you. It doesnβt register that itβs the camera guy with the handheld camera for a couple seconds. You imagine heβs zooming in, capturing everything. He must know the future audience does not want to miss a single second of how you react to coming again, and how San wonβt let up on you once you doβ¦ again.Β
Your eyes shut tight once your fourth climax thunders through you. Pure ecstasy erupts in every vein. Euphoria clouds your brain. The sheets beneath you two become even more soaked, and you can feel your release dripping down your thighs. You mustβve been loud because your throat feels scratchy and rough all of a sudden, but your head is in such a rush that you donβt even hear anything.Β
San holds you by your throat now, making you keep your face up.Β
Just as you predicted, San doesnβt stop or slow his pace whatsoever. True to his promise that heβs βgonna make you feel so goodβ. Well, that promise is currently turning you into a limp, fucked out mess. Youβve never had this many orgasms so quick in succession before. Itβs making your hormones go absolutely wild, and you cry harder, wetting Sanβs hand with your tears. The camera loves it.Β
There are some sounds near you that you canβt be bothered to discern, and you just lean into Sanβs hand on your throat. Fully intent on just letting him do whatever he wants to you at this point. He pretty much already is. Although, youβre not entirely sure how many more times you can cum without passing out. You hope heβll stop before that happens. You donβt want to embarrass yourself like that.Β
San subtly taps your throat, getting your attention, before raising your head a little higher.Β
You blink stupidly up at the cameraman in front of you, eyes half-lidded and heavy, struggling to keep them open. You flinch a little when you see that there are two more people in front of you, the director included. When did everyone get so much closer to the bed? All of them, you notice, are at least semi-hard. Director Choi nods behind the camera, muttering inaudible praises. Your hands grip the sheets, knuckles turning white, and pull them up towards your mouth to muffle your screams. Out of frame, Director Choi motions for an assistant to pull the sheets down, ripping your comfort away, exposing how loud youβre being. Tears sting your eyes, both from exertion and from the intense pleasure San is giving you.Β
βPussyβs so goodβ¦ so tight and wetβ¦ could fuck you forever.βΒ
Director Choi silently motions for San to keep talking like that.Β
San grunts, fighting to catch his breath enough to speak again. βSuch a good girlβ¦ gonna make you cum again.βΒ
And he does.Β
Before you even realize that itβs been simmering and building, it knocks into you sideways. This time, you canβt even scream. Your mouth drops open but no sound comes out due to your body locking up. San releases your throat, worried that youβre not breathing β and heβs right. He slows down considerably, moving your hair away from your face to check on you. Your body slowly relaxes again underneath him, one muscle at a time, and a low, guttural groan tears itself from your throat.Β
You can feel every inch of him dragging past your inner walls, and every slightest movement makes your pussy clench, trying to simultaneously push him out and suck him in further. Instead of continuing again, though, he pushes all the way into you one more time, and then stops.Β
Itβs somehow both torture and a relief. You feel so fucking full, but he isnβt doing anything to continue the dull flames that engulf your lower stomach, and yet you know itβs better than being empty. He could pull out, leave you to deal with that emptiness before you felt ready. He doesnβt. Appreciative thoughts swirl around your head and you cry harder, trying to hide your tears in the sheets.Β
When the camera crew and director see that heβs not continuing, they call for another break. Everyone moves away, and thereβs no longer a black cloud in front of you.Β
San doesnβt move an inch, though.Β Β
He brushes through your hair with his fingers, comforting you. Heβs intent on waiting until you calm down, not wanting to push you too far before youβre ready. He knows he went a little crazy, instantly getting addicted to the feeling of you coming around his dick, and you deserve a break. As long as you need.Β
But youβre addicted yourself. A real glutton for the pleasure heβs given you thus far. You push back and wiggle against him, trying to get him to move again. His hands push you down by your hips, keeping them still. You whine at the denial, looking over your shoulder at him with teary, red eyes. He almost gives in.Β
βI know, baby. Just relax with me for a moment.βΒ
You pout, another tear roaming down your cheek. Deep down, you know heβs right. Your body has been pleading for a break two orgasms ago. Itβs high time you listen to it. You collapse, finally letting yourself relax, solely focusing on the quiet murmur of the crew off to the side, and Sanβs fingers running through your hair.Β
Itβs a nice moment.Β Β
Nicer still when San litters your shoulders and back with gentle kisses, helping you calm down. Clearer thoughts slowly begin to reenter your mind, and your breaths even out, relatively back to normal. Better than the mixture of shallow inhales, long periods of holding your breath, and gasps for air. Because of the improved air intake, your head finally feels like itβs stopped swimming. Little by little, your energy comes back.Β
You take a deep inhale, sighing contently as you exhale it back out. Looking behind you again, you catch him already watching you.Β
βHi,β you mumble, half-smiling.
San smirks, his hand cupping your cheek. βHey, pretty girl. Feel okay?βΒ
You nod, humming, and you subtly push back against him. The feeling of his cock pressing into you doesnβt shock your body as much as it did before. Now itβs a welcome, familiar feeling. Sought after. You really are addicted. Maybe even insatiable when it comes to how well he fucks you.Β
With the other hand, he places a water bottle in front of your face, the same one with a straw poked through the cap from before. You donβt bother wondering where he got it from. You have a pretty good idea. Theyβre always everywhere during a break.Β
Once youβre done with the bottle, he places it against one of the pillows, where it will no doubt be collected by a production assistant within seconds.Β
You push back again, trying to get him to move. You hear him chuckle behind you.Β
βGreedy little thing, arenβt you?βΒ
Instead of contradicting his statement, you just nod. Why lie?Β
βWanna make you cum too,βΒ
San hums, just barely rolling his hips into yours. βHow do you wanna do that, kitten?βΒ
You steel yourself for what youβre about to do. Hoping he will let you go through with your plan, you pull yourself away from him, and he slips out of you. The emptiness hits just as hard as you thought it would, and you whimper at the initial feeling. If all goes to plan, you won't be for long.Β
San watches you carefully as you turn to face him on the bed, gently pushing him back against the pillows. His hands instinctually rest on your hips as you straddle him, and he looks up at you, patiently waiting for your next move. At least, coming across as patient externally. You donβt miss how his dick twitches, eager to be engulfed by your warmth again. He must feel something equivalent to the emptiness you felt when you pulled away.Β
Youβll fix that gladly.Β
Out of the corner of your eye, you can see the crew start to come back to their spots β lights, camera, microphones. They must have learned not to stay too far away when it comes to filming you two. You do your best to hide your grin.Β
San helps you line up the head of his cock to your entrance, and you steady yourself with your hands on his shoulders as you slowly sink down. His eyes flutter shut, eyebrows furrowing as he exhales shakily. Following his lead, you donβt give him much time to adjust before you start moving.Β
You swear you hear him whimper. Just once, but you catch it nevertheless.Β
He keeps his eyes down, locked between you, watching your cunt swallow his dick over and over again. You bite your lip, nails digging into his shoulders as his hands become more firm on your hips. The next time you sink down, he pulls you down hard. You gasp, not expecting it, and he attacks your lips once again.Β
You kiss him back just as eagerly, increasing your pace. Your thighs already start to protest from the strain, but you canβt bring yourself to care or stop. Not when heβs moaning into your mouth like this. Every noise you pull out of him is pure music to your ears. A rhapsody you could hear a thousand times and not get bored of. You pull away from his lips just to hear him clearer, and he chases you. He nips your bottom lip, one of his hands slowly travelling up to knead one of your boobs again.Β
Breaths mingling, you shiver in his hold. His other hand dips down to rest on your ass, squeezing the flesh there as you bounce on his cock.Β
The heat of it all consumes you, drives you to get him to cum. You want to hear him. You want to repay him for making you cum four times, and put in just as much effort.Β
Itβs a battle to try and ignore your own pleasure, building up for a fifth time. Youβre not convinced you can cum again. However, now youβre willing to see what happens. If you faint, you faint.Β
You clench around him on purpose, grinding into him and rolling your hips, your gummy walls massaging his length and successfully driving him crazy. His head falls back against the headboard, and his fingers begin to leave bruises on your skin.Β
βSo fucking good,β he hisses, βsuch a good girlβ¦ gonna make me cum so hard.βΒ
The thought and image that accompanies it gives you a second wind of energy. Your hands move to his chest, and you press down as you continue to fuck him.Β
βWant you to cum inside me,β you beg him, hot breath hitting his neck. You feel him shudder underneath you.Β
San only nods, unable to speak. You lick a stripe up his neck, tasting the slight saltiness of his sweat and kissing the hinge of his jaw. Right next to his ear, you moan again, enjoying how he tenses up.Β
Suddenly, both of his arms are wrapped around your waist, and he sits up a little more. One of his hands presses into your upper back, supporting you as he starts fucking up into you, seamlessly matching your rhythm.Β
He lets out a choked moan, cutting it off by kissing you one more time before his eyes shut tight.Β
βGonna cumβ¦fuck, Iβm gonna cum so deep inside you, kitten. Gonna feel me for days.βΒ
You whine at his words, and he seems to have worked himself up further by saying it as well.Β
βPlease, sir, need your cum inside of me. Please give it to meββΒ
San pushes you down onto your back before you can blink. Your legs wrap around him, and the pleasure increases for you almost instantaneously. When you look down, you swear you can see a slight bulge in your stomach. His lips attach to your neck, sucking and biting to muffle his moans as much as possible. Every sound he makes is so pretty.Β
He pounds into you without any more room for mercy, concentrating on coming again. And he can feel that youβre close again too.Β
βCum with me,β he pants against your neck, βgive me one more. Let me feel your pretty cunt cum on my cock one more time, baby.βΒ Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β
One more. You nod, eyelids growing heavy again. Everything is perfect in this moment. The feeling of his cock dragging against your walls, the head of it pressing against your g-spot and fanning the flames of your arousal until it engulfs you like wildfire; his soft, plush lips on your neck, his words in your ear, and his warm, firm skin under your hands.Β
As if that all wasnβt enough, San spits on his fingers and starts to rub your clit again.Β
Everything adds up to push you over the edge.Β
You cry out, body completely spent as you weakly squirt for him again. You can hear your heartbeat pounding in your ears, adrenaline and euphoria taking turns to run through your bloodstream. The sheets beneath you are completely soaked through. Every sense is both heightened and dulled. Exhaustion pulls itself over you like a weighted blanket.Β
And your climax triggers his.
True to his word, he comes deep inside of you, filling you up until itβs leaking. The additional warmth is comforting for a second, until your stomach begins to cramp a little bit. Not enough to hurt, but just enough for you to notice. Youβre definitely not used to coming this much.Β
San shudders violently before dropping to his elbows, careful not to crush you under his weight. Both of you catch your breaths, chests heaving as you coax air back into your lungs. You tangle one of your hands in his hair, holding him close to you as you take this moment to settle down. He buries his face in your neck, small, audible sighs occasionally escaping him.Β
Unbeknownst to you, heβs never cum that hard before. Years of experience behind him, sure, heβs gotten close to this level, but never was able to reach it until now.Β
Reluctantly, he slowly drags himself out of your pussy, eyes immediately glancing down to see his cum leaking out. He smirks as he watches you fight to keep it inside, not wanting to let it go yet.Β
Then, like he does every single time, he ducks down to lick one more long, slow path up your pussy. Entrance to clit. A silent βthank youβ. You whimper, legs closing when he pulls away.Β
βCut! Print it.βΒ
And heβs gone.Β
You feel you just got a violent slap back into reality.Β
Whatβ¦just happened? You slowly push yourself up, with admittedly great difficulty.Β
Half of the staff flutter around you, while the others flock to Sanβs side, covering him up in his robe and starting to lead him towards his dressing room. The production assistants assigned to you donβt say much, handing you the same water bottle as before and urging you to drink it all. You watch the cameraman and the director talk, leisurely packing everything up. Just another day at the office. Itβs all over just like that.Β
Meanwhile, you feelβ¦ stunned. Maybe even a little empty, and not just physically this time. You never thought about how aftercare is pretty much nonexistent in shoots like this. Everything is strictly business. Professional. Void of any emotion for the other βactorβ. Still, as someone runs a brush through your messy hair, and someone else wraps a silk robe over your shoulders, you find that you cannot tear your gaze away from the direction of Sanβs dressing room door. Your eyes threaten to tear up, a dull yet powerful feeling of rejection blooming in your chest.Β
Maybe you arenβt cut out for this type of thing, no matter how many offers you receive. Not if this is how it ends, as if nothing happened. Like none of it mattered. Another notch in Choi Sanβs belt.Β
Director Choi suddenly appears in front of you, and youβre quick to act like nothing is wrong. βYou did great,β he says, βthank you for your time today.βΒ
You manage a fake smile and thank him as well, apologizing for any issues you may have caused by being impatient or loud.Β
He simply waves it off, βHappens more than you think. Have a good rest of your night, Miss Y/L/N. Maybe weβll work together again in the future.βΒ
βMaybeβ.Β
His words stick to you, gnawing at your skin like leeches. He truly didnβt mean to make you feel worse, you know that, and yet he really drove home just howβ¦ common you feel. Not special whatsoever after all.Β
You imagine going back home and going live again. The notorious four exclusive viewers will want to know how it went, and youβre going to have to tell them something. You doubt youβll be able to lie. Woo will probably be able to tell somethingβs wrong.Β
Maybe, once this check hits, you can just disappear for the foreseeable future. If youβre astronomically lucky, everyone will forget it happened so you wonβt have to relive the very tail end of it. You run a hand through your hair. Youβre so fucking dramatic.
It hurts a little extra when even Hongjoong doesn't stick around to check in on you, tending to his star first and foremost. You canβt say you really blame him, though β that is his job. San should be his priority.Β
Itβs just that you desperately wish for a friendly face, or someone to genuinely check in with you. Comfort you.Β
Not to be surrounded by strangers who wonβt look you in the eye.Β Β
You donβt even know if heβs still here. But here you are, standing in front of his dressing room door like a fucking idiot. Another girl obsessed with him. Nothing new, just another number theyβll have to delete.Β
Even so, you want to try and talk to him. Ask him why the fuck he left in such a hurry. Your hands readjust their grip on your purse, with half a mind to swing it at whoever opens the door.Β
Gathering up all the courage imaginable, your hand raises in a fist, and you softly knock on the door three times.Β
To be honest, youβre not really expecting a response. Half of the staff are gone already, itβs unlikely that heβd want to stick around here any longer than he has to. When you checked the time on your phone in your dressing room, you were surprised to see that itβs already nearing nine oβclock. Your stomach had growled almost immediately upon seeing it. You look over your shoulder, watching the rest of the staff still here turning off some of the lights and gathering wires.Β Β Β Β
Distracted, you jump about a mile in the air when the door opens, revealing San, now also dressed and looking like heβs ready to leave. His eyebrows raise in surprise at the sight of you.Β
βHey,β he says, so casually. βWhatβre you still doing here?βΒ
Embarrassment hits you like a brick wall. Yep, just another girl on the callsheet that stuck around to beg him for more. Ugh.Β
βIβm sorry, I donβt want to bother you,β you say, already giving up on the whole idea of confronting him. Britney canβt help you now.Β
You start to turn on your heel, but he opens the door wider, stepping aside as if to invite you in. βNo, no. Not bothering me. Whatβs up?βΒ
Your mouth dries. Okay, now you got to follow through. But godβ¦ does he really not know? You wonder if this has never come up before. If all of the girls before you are just collectively tougher than you emotionally and can handle no aftercare, no follow up, nothing. You should be, too, honestly. You know what porn is and what it isnβt. Itβs not exactly a dating service. Two hot people fuck each other and go their separate ways, money wired to them before their heads hit the pillow at night.Β
Stillβ¦ you and Yeosang arenβt dating, and after your collab with him, he redressed you and cuddled you for an hour straight. He made sure you knew he wasnβt going anywhere, that the friendship is still intact. You werenβt being used.Β
You hesitate to step into his dressing room, and ultimately decide to just stay put. Stand your ground. You donβt want to take too long, you just need an answer.Β
Out with it.Β
βI was just wondering why you left so quickly? Did I do something to offend you in any way?βΒ Β
San blinks, slight confusion clouding his face. βOh, no, I justβ I saw your form. Didnβt want to hang around and make you uncomfortable.βΒ
Now you stare at him, just as confused. βWait, what? What about my form?βΒ
βYou checked off βHard Noβ to aftercare.βΒ Β
β¦Pardon?Β
No way.Β
He must see the bewilderment in your face because he fishes his phone out of his pocket to show you.Β
βYeah, Hongjoong saidβ¦β he trails off, the light of his phone screen reflecting in his dark brown eyes. βYeah, look.βΒ
He holds his phone up to show you, and you step closer to it, squinting to see for yourself. Sure enough, amidst all of the other dozens of checkmarks, you accidentally fucked yourself over and selected βHard Noβ for aftercare. Luckily, you didnβt select one of the bodily fluid options as a βHard Yesβ in your evident past confusion. You bury your face in your hands.Β
βOh my god. That was meant to be a βHard Yesβ.β You groan. Guilt threatens to eat you alive for all your negative thoughts towards him, and the texts you sent Yeosang while in your dressing room after the fact. Youβre going to have to do some serious damage control to get Yeosang to not hate him forever. Itβll surely start with a screenshot of the form you fucked up, followed by a dramatic statement of your stupidity.Β
San pockets his phone again, almost sheepish. He hesitantly steps closer to you, unsure of how to fix this.Β
βIβm so sorry,β he says quietly, βI shouldβve double checked with you.βΒ
βNo, no, please donβt blame yourself when itβs my own mistake.βΒ
βStillβ¦β he trails off, looking down at the floor.Β
It hits you that heβs really hurt by this. Hurt for you.Β
βSanβ¦β you tilt your head to try and meet his eye. βItβs alright, really. I feel much better now that I know it wasnβt on purpose or because I did something wrong.βΒ
βIβd never do that to you, or anybody. I always stress how important aftercare is to the directors I work with so they donβt try to rush through it.β San runs a hand through his freshly-washed hair as he speaks, exasperated. You vaguely remember him saying something akin to that in one of the interviews that you watched.Β
Damn, he really is nice. Here you were at the start of this, thinking heβd be a cocky son of a bitch who has the world at his feet, and anything he wants within arms reach. The last two parts of that description may be right, but your assumed attitude is definitely not. Wellβ¦ maybe not entirely. The cockiness isnβt used to make anyone feel small, thatβs the important difference. Itβs confidence, more than anything.Β
βI know,β you smile, trying to make him feel better. βReally, itβs okay.βΒ
He seems unconvinced. βCan I make it up to you in some way?βΒ
You shift your weight from one foot to the other. If you wouldnβt immediately cringe at yourself for doing so, youβd maybe ask for a hug or something. Physical contact in any way to comfort you, make you believe it. But the guilt he obviously feels is enough. The knowledge that he truly thought itβs something you were so against, and he respected it anyway, is more than enough.Β
βYou donβt have to, San.βΒ
βI want to, Y/N.βΒ
Your pulse skips a beat, wondering what he has in mind. The way he said it was so final, like he made up his mind already. His phone reappears in his hand, texting someone quickly and sending it off. He then reaches into his dressing room, turning off the light after doing a quick scan of it and closing the door behind him.Β
βCan I walk you out?βΒ
That, youβll allow.Β
βSure. Are you going home?β You ask, changing the subject as the two of you start walking towards the exit doors.Β
βNah, not yet. Thereβs a gym on this floor Iβm gonna go to first.βΒ
You just nod in response, wondering how on earth he has the energy to go to the gym right now. You have a very special date with your bed for the foreseeable future. Itβs highly doubtful that youβll wake up before three in the afternoon. Truthfully, you canβt wait. Maybe youβll sleep off some of the soreness youβre sure to have tomorrow.Β
βOh, by the way, do you have an agent?β San asks you out of nowhere, right before you get to the doors.Β
You blink once. Twice, processing. βNoβ¦?βΒ
Yeosangβs the only one who may even come close. Heβs the one you ask before doing anything, wanting his opinion and blessing. But technically and professionally, no, youβre an independent artist as far as youβre concerned.Β
βIβd find one soon,β San says, glancing towards the bed, soaked through. βYouβre about to get a lot of offers.βΒ
You blush furiously, reminded of everything that transpired between you barely an hour ago. βMaybe I should just take yours.βΒ
San groans, βHonestly, do it. Iβm sure Joong could use a break from my bullshit.βΒ
You laugh, trying to hide it with your hand. San pretends to be offended that you agree, clutching his heart in betrayal, which makes you laugh harder. The doors push open, the white fluorescent lights blinding both of you after being so used to the golden studio lights on set.Β
βMaybe I will let you have him,β he says, a smirk growing across his face. βItβs good manners.βΒ
He looks at you like he knows something you donβt, and it bothers you. The word choice sounds familiar, but you canβt place it. Before you can ask, he steps closer to you, invading your personal space for the first time since being intimate with each other. You hold your breath.Β
βGoodnight, baby.β He murmurs, pressing a kiss to your forehead before walking down towards the opposite end of the hallway, where you can only assume is the direction of the gym.Β
Fuckinβ hellβ¦Β
You stand there like an idiot for another couple of seconds, still processing what just happened in the span of five minutes. You also try to figure out the implication behind his word choice. βMannersβ. It bugs you so much, you know you heard something about it recently, but canβt pinpoint where or when.Β
The question of what he meant follows you all the way to the lobby. You press the down button on autopilot, just now remembering to text the driver to tell him that youβre ready to be picked up downstairs and taken home. From down the hallway, you hear the door to the studio swing open again β probably some of the crew heading home as well. You glance towards the stairs, not exactly jumping at the chance to be stuck in an elevator with a bunch of strangers who watched you have sex an hour ago.Β
But the footsteps that follow the sound of the door closing are what gives you pause. Theyβre hurried, and headed towards the lobby. The elevator dings behind you. You turn around just as the mystery runner comes around the corner.Β
βOh! Hi, Mr. KimββΒ Β
Hongjoong jogs over to you, catching you before the elevator doors open.Β
βSorry if I startled you. San is wondering if we can arrange another collab, but this time on your livestream.β He speaks quickly, like time is of the essence.Β Β
You stutter, brain trying to connect with your vocal cords.Β
βWhat?β You ask, even though you heard and processed everything Hongjoong said just fine. Youβre just wondering if you actually heard him right. Today just keeps getting stranger and stranger. More interesting, definitely.Β
Heβs quick to repeat himself, almost pleading with his eyes for you to say βyesβ.Β
At least with the emails you had some time to think everything over. Now Hongjoong is staring dead at you, waiting for the response he hopes to hear.Β
You canβt help it. You want to make him chase you again.Β
βTell him Iβll think about it,β you say as sweetly as possible, stepping into the elevator.Β
You try not to enjoy the perplexed look on Hongjoongβs face until the doors close completely.Β
Everything in his world is immediate. Youβre not used to it whatsoever.Β
Those are the thoughts you have as you step out of the elevator in your apartment building, walking up to your door. You're more than ready to throw your shit down in the kitchen and go the fuck to bed. Your phone is in the process of being fished out of your pocket, intent on texting Yeosang to ask if he's around for a debrief.
You stop dead in your tracks when you look up, about to unlock the front door. Perched tall and proud, is a beautiful bouquet of purple flowers in a glass vase right outside your door. A card is placed in between the overlapping petals, and you canβt help but gawk at the sight of it.Β
How the hell did he find your address?Β
Ohβ Hongjoong, probably. Your initial creeped-out feeling vanishes. Hongjoong can just find anything for San, youβre sure.Β
Punching in the keycode to your door, and switching the kitchen lights on, you place the flowers on the counter, taking a second to admire them. Purple, you note. Your favorite. Again, Hongjoong must have told him, but you canβt help but smile β he really did want to make it up to you.Β
You pluck the small card from the flowers and read it, sitting down at your kitchen island.Β
Hope you had a good time today.Β
Sorry for being such a stupid slut </3
-San
Your smile widens, laughing and rereading it. You flip it over, and on the back is a phone number, scrawled in blue ink.Β
Perhaps you missed a hidden clause in the forms that makes you promise to not fall in love with him.Β
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