you were the perfect dosage of bad luck

i can’t stand talking about you but for some reason i don’t want to stop

don’t ask me that question i can’t handle it

the second you were mentioned my chest began to burn and i know why

i’m afraid you’re the love of my life and it hasn’t even started yet

i want the heat to go away because it reminds me of you

do you know how i’m feeling? do you even wonder how i’m feeling? we can’t be friends. because if we’re friends, i’ll just end up falling in love with you over and over again, every day. this is how i loved you. unconditionally, purely, more and more each day. each hour, even. and still my shelf life was too short. i lost my sparkle too early. too soon into our relationship i was no longer the person you fell in love with. i know i’m not enough. i might have been before, but apparently not anymore. you said i’d always be enough, i was more than enough. why must you lie to yourself?

i can’t help but remember when she was looking at you and you put your hand on my messed up knee and held my hand and looked in my eyes instead of at her. i know you wanted to look at her. but please, tell me, did you love me then?