#;silverisms

hear me with an honest heart

people hear without really listening, most of the time, and you hate it. you know that your words are falling dead from your mouth in a conversation as the other person just sits and waits until it is their turn to talk again. you crave more, you want to be heard with a purpose and an honesty of intentional knowing. because you are so many things, and they live within you, and you want to share them, but it is hard, because to speak is to allow someone to listen. to speak is to chance being heard. and if you are heard, and if they listen, then they will know. my darling dove, you deserve to be known. you deserve to talk until your voice gets rough and to have someone listen to every word. you deserve the kindness of an active investment by another in what it is you have to say. it isn't selfish, i promise, i swear.

tagged by: @kingofdirtandnothing

DEFECTIVENESS

The emotion most recurring in you is shame. Shame is what you feel when your defects are exposed. You will do almost anything to avoid this shame. Consequently you go to great lengths to keep your defectiveness hidden. You feel that your defectiveness is inside you and not immediately observable. You feel like you have to pretend to be someone you are not to be accepted. You hide your true self to fit in, but that also means that many people in your life will never know the real you.

At your core you feel completely unworthy of love. It is possible that you struggle with feelings of depression – a kind of low-level depression always lurking in the background. You may be drawn to partners who are critical of you and put you down. They generate high chemistry, but reinforce your feelings of defectiveness.

It is likely that you spend a lot of time comparing yourself unfavorably to others and feel inadequate as a result. You feel like an impostor when you are successful. You are anxious that you cannot maintain your success. Your sense of well-being is fragile, and even small setbacks or failures may be enough to make you nervous and stressed. To feel humiliated and inadequate, as if the whole world is about to catch sight of your defectiveness.

tagged by: @kingofdirtandnothing​