Faith
One of my favorite jokes comes from a joke-a-day calendar that I got as a gift years and years ago. I’ve long since misplaced that little piece of paper, but it goes something like this:
One night, it was raining so hard that it began to flood. Our protagonist – let’s call him Steve – happened to be inside a building at the moment. As the streets began to flood, a rescue crew drove up in a truck. “Get in the truck, we’re trying to save you!” They yelled, motioning for him to come over. But Steve refused to budge and yelled back, “No, God will save me!” So they drove away, leaving Steve still inside the building.
The floodwaters began to rise, forcing Steve to go up to the second story of the building. A rescue boat happened to stop by. “Get in the boat, we’re trying to save you!” Yet again, Steve’s reply was “No, God will save me!” So they floated away.
The building itself was starting to flood, so Steve retreated to the roof. A rescue helicopter hovered overhead. “Get in the helicopter, we’re trying to save you!” But once more, Steve’s reply was “No, God will save me!” So they flew away, leaving Steve behind.
Unfortunately, Steve died. At the pearly gates, he asked Saint Peter, “Why didn’t God save me?”
Peter looks up at him, shaking his head. “He tried! He sent you a truck, a boat, AND a helicopter!”
Why do I mention this now? Maybe it’s because I’m in a similar situation…maybe? Here’s the lowdown: at !gnite this past summer I felt convicted to give up going abroad during the summer to commit to CSMP. So that’s what I did – the deadline for the maymester and summer abroad applications came and went, and I didn’t even bother applying (tbh I was too busy to, anyhow). Dental school offers started rolling in, and so far I’ve gotten into 2 out of the 3 Texas schools: San Antonio and Houston. The thing is, my first choice is still Dallas for a number of reasons. Basically, they have a really strong public health focus (what I want to do in the future!!) and many outreach programs, and students get a lot more clinical experience there than at other schools. Additionally, the start date is in mid-August, meaning I could go on CSMP. San Antonio is my second choice, but they start in late July (no CSMP). And honestly I wasn’t really feeling it at the Houston school (even though technically I would be able to go on CSMP if I went there)
So where does that leave me? In a limbo where I’m praying that Dallas sends me something, and soon. Initially I wasn’t very concerned about it, but the new dentist at the office I go to casually mentioned how she also got the same two offers, and never heard back from Dallas. That scared me. What if Dallas never gets back to me too? I really liked that school, and I really do want to go on CSMP. If it doesn’t work out, I can already feel the bitterness that would well up at missing one of my last opportunities to study abroad for, well, nothing.
There is one thing, though. My health professions advisor told me that I could actually write a letter and send it to Dallas, explaining why I specifically want to go to that school. I didn’t give it much thought until that one dentist told me about her own experience. It may not do much, but it’s worth a shot, right? Could this be the truck/boat/helicopter that I’ve been pushing away? Or am I looking at the situation in completely the wrong way? Where is the line between praying by faith that one certain something will happen and accepting that God has a plan that we may not understand? As a beloved sister propositioned me, where’s the line between praying by faith that something will happen and simply being proactive? And even if Dallas did send me something, the main dentist at the office unintentionally screwed me over when he recommended that I don’t go to Dallas even if I do get an offer – the area is not very safe, apparently. And to my super-paranoid Asian parents, that’s the worst possible thing he could have said.
Were things too easy, too predictable before? Is this God’s way of saying “trust me” in an area where I honestly felt like I didn’t need much faith?
And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.
Hebrews 11:6
