Blue & Grey

Everyone had opinions. Your family had opinions. His family had opinions. Friends, coworkers, even distant relatives you hadn't spoken to in years suddenly had opinions.

Every phone call became another conversation about flowers, guest lists, seating arrangements, or colors. It felt like you were carrying the entire wedding on your shoulders, and because you were so used to taking care of everyone around you, nobody seemed to notice how heavy it had become.

Maybe Taehyung did.

He never said anything at first, but you caught him watching you sometimes. He'd glance over from the couch while you sat surrounded by notebooks and sticky notes, your laptop balanced on your knees as you compared vendors and replied to emails.

More than once he'd found you asleep on top of your planner long after midnight. Every time he suggested taking a break, you'd smile and promise you were fine.

The problem was that you weren't.

By the time Friday arrived, you felt exhausted. Dinner with friends was supposed to be a chance to relax, but somehow the wedding found its way into the conversation before appetizers had even arrived. One question became two, then five, then ten.

Had you picked your dress? What flowers were you using? Had you finalized the guest list?

You answered every question with a smile until someone asked about the seating chart and the words slipped out before you could stop them.

"Can we not talk about the wedding for five minutes?"

The table fell silent.

Immediately, guilt settled in your stomach. You apologized before anyone could say anything, insisting you hadn't meant it that way, but the damage was already done. The rest of the evening passed in a blur. You laughed when you were supposed to laugh and nodded when you were supposed to nod, but by the time you and Taehyung got home, you felt completely drained.

You barely made it to the bedroom before tears started burning behind your eyes.

The mattress dipped beside you a few minutes later. Taehyung didn't ask what was wrong right away. He simply sat next to you and rubbed slow circles against your back until your breathing steadied.

Only then did he quietly ask, "How long have you been carrying all of this by yourself?"

The question hurt more than you expected.

"I don't know," you admitted.

His hand paused. "Why didn't you tell me?"

You let out a shaky laugh. "Because I didn't want to bother you."

Taehyung looked genuinely offended by that.

"Bother me?" he repeated. "You're serious?"

When you finally looked up, he was staring at you like you'd said the most ridiculous thing imaginable.

"You're never a bother."

The next morning, you woke up expecting another day of phone calls and wedding planning. Instead, Taehyung informed you that you were leaving the house and refused to explain where you were going.

The two of you spent the day wandering through a bookstore, sharing pastries at a small café, and sitting together in a park while the afternoon sun warmed your skin. Nobody asked about centerpieces. Nobody mentioned guest lists.

For the first time in months, you felt like a person instead of a wedding planner.

Later that night, you sat together on the living room floor. The wedding binder remained untouched on the coffee table between you. You rested your head against Taehyung's shoulder, and for a while neither of you spoke.

"I just wanted everyone to be happy," you eventually confessed.

Taehyung tilted his head.

"But what about you?"

You laughed softly at his words, "What about me?"

The look he gave you made your smile disappear. "No," he said gently. "Seriously, y/n. What about you?"

You didn't have an answer.

Taehyung reached for your hand and turned it over in his, his thumb brushing across the engagement ring sitting on your finger.

"You've spent months worrying about everybody else. Your family. My family. Friends. Guests. Vendors. Every little detail."

His voice remained soft, but there was something firm beneath it.

"And somewhere in all of that, you forgot about yourself."

The tears returned instantly.

"The wedding is important," he continued, squeezing your hand. "Of course it is. But the flowers aren't the reason we're getting married. The cake isn't the reason we're getting married. The seating chart isn't the reason we're getting married."

You lowered your gaze.

His fingers tilted your chin back up.

"You are."

The tears finally spilled over.

Taehyung smiled sadly before brushing them away with his thumb.

"You're the person I'm marrying. You're my favorite person. You're the reason we're doing any of this in the first place."

He leaned forward and pressed a kiss against your forehead.

"So stop treating yourself like you're the least important part of your own wedding."

A laugh escaped through your tears, and then another.

And soon, you found yourself tucked against his chest while he wrapped his arms around you and held you there. The wedding still needed planning. The guest list still needed finishing. There were still a hundred little things waiting for you tomorrow.

For the first time, though, in all of the chaos, none of it felt overwhelming.

Because no matter what went wrong, you'd still be standing at the end of that aisle... and Taehyung would still be waiting for you.

┈ [ ✉️ ] I hope you understand the wedding correlation Massi !! I love you !!

Most artists have items as muses but you? you have a living and breathing person as your muse.

After all he offered to be your muse — in exchange you let him touch your face.

You absolutely found that weird and still do, he said he wants to “map out your beauty of a face”, did you have any idea what that meant? hell no.

You had gained and lost muses throughout your two years as an artist and oftentimes so you took heavy breaks from your work mainly because nothing new had come to mind but also because you had no one personal in your life to share it with.

Your thoughts were interrupted by a deep male voice, “여기요!”, you blink a few times before looking up.

“huh?”, you tilt your head slightly in confusion.

“are you okay?”, the male asked, looking at you with a paintbrush in his hands.

“oh yeah I’m good Tae!”, you nodded at him and stood up from where you were sitting.

“you sure?”

“yeah.”

“alright then ..”

You nodded and looked around, “hey tae have you seen —”

“your paintbrush? I have it.”, he smirked slightly as you walked towards him and took the paintbrush out of his hand.

“oh haha very funny.”

“it definitely was.”

You look at him and roll your eyes, “you like teasing me don’t you?”

He smirked again and walked over to you and before you could walk away — his hand shot out and gently grabbed your wrist and gently pulled you closer towards him.

“What are you doing?”

“What does it look like?”

“Tae we’re supposed —”

Taehyung lifted his finger up and gently put it to your lips, “shh ..” you looked up at him and opened your mouth again but before you could get a word in — he kissed you.

The kiss was slow, sensual and soft — tasted like strawberries, which just so happens to be his favorite. When his lips were on yours, speaking wasn’t an option anymore.

For an older man he sure can kiss good — really knows how to keep pulling you in for more.

He reluctantly broke the kiss and spoke against your lips, “정말 아름다우세요 ..” he breathed in and out through his nose a bit heavily, “몇 시간이고 당신에게 키스할 수 있어요 …”, he looked at you and oh boy you’d be lying if you didn’t feel his eyes stare into your soul every time he looks at you.

Sometimes he stares at you as if you’ll disappear at any given moment.

He looked at you, “were you always this pretty?” you shrugged your shoulders, “I guess so.” he smiled slightly.

He looked away for a brief moment and gently slid his hand down to your hand — his thumb caressing over your knuckles.

“what are you doing, hm?”

“I can’t caress your pretty knuckles now?”

“hey now i never said that!”

“well you did question it so ..”

“I — shut up!”

“make me.”

your cheeks heat up and slowly turn pink, he smirks slightly and pulls you closer — you’re against his chest now.

“cat got your tongue now 여보?”

“no — !”

“it sure seems like it ..”

“well I’m not!”

“you sure?”

“yes I am!”

“prove it then.”

“how the hell am I supposed to prove —”

He kissed you again — this time it felt even more softer and the taste of strawberries became stronger with every kiss.

You giggled as he was kissing you and he pulled his lips away from yours, leaning his forehead against yours, “giggling are we?”, you nodded and giggled once again.

“뭐가 그렇게 웃겨요?”

“nothing, nothing!”

“so then why are you giggling like I just tickled you .. I mean I can actually make you giggle if you want me too.”

you shook your head, “no no it’s okay!” he nodded in response.

he shrugged his shoulders, “the offers will always be open.”

A comfortable silence had fallen over them both as they looked at each other, every time Taehyung looked at you — it was as if he was offering you a piece of his soul that was the most vulnerable and maybe he was.

His eyes stared into yours with such passion that could make anyone melt and his gaze did just that — every single time, it never fails.

You still couldn’t look away after all this time, yes he was an older man and you shouldn’t be falling for him but when he’s on his knees begging for you — how could you resist?

“tae?”

“hm?”

“you agreed to be my muse — in exchange I let you touch my face .. why?”

He glanced away, his gaze landing on the empty canvas before looking back at you.

“your canvas is completely untouched.”

He never deflects a question, that’s a bit odd.

“tae —”

“hm?”

“you still haven’t answered my question ..”

“some questions are better left unanswered, you know?”

you looked at him and could tell he was lying but didn’t press on it further, “yeah .. I know what you mean.” he smiled slightly and nodded.

gosh his lips are so kissable and so sweet maybe that's why you’re sitting in his lap, making out with him.

his soft lips touched yours with such delicacy and warmth — as if you had been kissed by an angel. in the heat of the moment your hands snake up around his neck and gently pull him closer towards you.

“제발 ..”

“please what?”

he slowly pulled his lips away from yours, “are you okay with this?” you nodded and opened your mouth but he cut you off before you could say anything, “w— we can just keep it at this pace if you want .. we don’t have to rush into anything ..” you looked at him, “tae if you’re uncomfortable —” he immediately shook his head, “I’m not I just want you to be comfortable and partially because I like taking my time with you and only you ..”

“여보 .. I felt like I have known you my whole life .. we just connect on a deeper level I feel …”

“now that you mention it .. ever since I first met you a few months back .. it’s got me thinking.”

“thinking about what?”

“it’s going to sound silly but —”

“anything you say or do will ever sound silly.”

“sometimes I just get this feeling like we knew each other in a past life, you know?”

he nodded, “it can definitely feel like that sometimes — hey so I kinda have something to ask ..”

you tilted your head in confusion, “what is it?” he looked at you and opened his mouth but then the doorbell rang — there goes that moment.

He gently maneuvers you off of his lap and stands up looking back at you, “I’ll go get it, stay here.” you nodded and watched as he walked off.

As he answered the door, you stood up and looked around, walking towards the window you didn’t see his bag on the floor and accidentally tripped over it, causing a few things to spill out.

“shit.”, you bent down and started picking a few things up that fell out of his bag, your eyes briefly landed on the paper that fell out and didn’t pay much attention to it until you picked it up.

You turned the paper around and looked up before looking down at the paper again — beginning to skim through it. Your eyes landed on something that caught your interest — ‘DECLINING VISION LOST DUE TO SEVERE DAMAGE TO THE OPTIC NERVE’ your eyes widened slightly and looked up finding Taehyung in the doorway.

You hold the paper up, “you’re going blind ..?” he stared at the paper before meeting your eyes, “I was going to tell you — every time I tell people they always baby me and act like I need to be coddled ..” your eyes softened and you put the paper down and walked closer to him.

“제발 don’t leave me ..”

“is that why you didn’t tell me? you thought I’d leave you and belittle you ..? Tae this doesn’t make me love you any less .. in fact you felt comfortable enough to tell me about it even after I found the paper ..”

“so you won’t leave?”

“of course not, plus now you get a free pass to touch my face whenever you want.”

He looked at you and then busted with laughter — followed by your laughter as well, soon enough both of your laughs filled the room.

“oh! I almost forgot .. what did you want to ask me? you know .. before your doorbell rang.”

You looked at him and gently ran your fingers through his hair, your eyes not leaving him the whole time.

“marry me.”

Your fingers stopped — blinking a few times, “what did you just say?”

“marry me.”

“marry —”

“I mean I know we’ve only known each other for a few months —”

“yes.”

His eyes lit up with excitement and he walked closer to you, “wait .. really??” you nodded, “yes really tae, I’ll marry you.”

He looked at you and then jumped up and down with excitement and ran into his bag with an engagement ring box, “I was planning this for a better time and contemplating your rejection but —”, you kissed him, the kiss was slightly desperate but soft nonetheless.

He opened up the ring box and took the ring out — sliding it onto your finger. You looked at the ring and smiled at him.

“내 사랑 정말 많이 사랑해 ..”, he leaned his forehead against yours.

“You mean so much to me ..”

“I’d travel through time and space just to spend it with you …”

“really?”

“yeah, really.”

여기요 — hey

정말 아름다우세요 — you’re so beautiful

몇 시간이고 당신에게 키스할 수 있어요 — I could kiss you for hours

여보 — sweetheart

뭐가 그렇게 웃겨요? — what’s so funny?

제발 — please

내 사랑 정말 많이 사랑해 — I love you so much my love