It’s been so easy to slip into the routine of being in the mountains. Group chat with Clair and Sam and amber and Ali and Seb and Nic and Aug and plans most nights with them, always running into Luke and Nick and Travis and Kimiko and Matthew. Working on this committee in Lauri’s memory with Lauren. Dancing and karaoke and pool at the bear claw, always people we know around. Taking little trips to LA and SD to visit friends there. Taking Cathleen’s yoga class just like old times. Making friends with the gym owner and rigging my silks to practice. Breakfast at the diners. Everyone says you gotta meet the new acupuncturist he’s good people. When I go back to PR the thought of leaving is gonna eat me up, and I gotta figure out how to make training work out here, but I feel so at home, it’s so easy. Somehow I didn’t realize or remember the community I have here. Maybe it’s just because I’m single for the first time since I left for college. Hm.

Drove Travis back to his house and then spent the night at Aug’s. Played with his giant fat cat and had tea and massaged his fucked up hand and slept until noon in his very dark room. He showed me upstairs because he said his mom had told him to show me because I’d like it. Met his brother. We got up and drove to breakfast in his red convertible. I’m actually glad we’re not sleeping together because I’m emotionally unavailable and would probably destroy it, but as friends I get to keep him forever. Like I told him, we’re family whether we like it or not because we’ll always be bonded through our mutual connections. Clair said it’s lucky we do like it.

Last night we all started to play duck duck goose on the turf outside the bar and more and more people who were walking past joined us until we had like 30 adults playing and we played for like two hours. We took it seriously I skinned my hip sliding home it was so fun.

In my party woman professionally flourishing woman strong woman well read woman connecting with everyone woman era

Said one drink stayed out until 4 am lost a bunch of games of pool made out with my friend kissed the cult member who’s always trying to recruit people at the bar sang Fiona apple at karaoke went to afters at this guys house and held his pet snake made like twenty people play the Korean animal game and got home as the sun was rising

Had plans for ten of my friends to spend the night, got like $200 worth of Chinese food, and all 10 cancelled within an hour :,)

A year ago my life was a black hole of lexapro withdrawal and domestic abuse and isolation and I could cry with gratitude for what it is now. I laugh until my belly hurts most days and I spend my time in beautiful places across this continent and I get the opportunity to do work im woefully under qualified for but rise to the occasion, and I do it with some of my best friends. I feel very well loved. So well loved I can’t believe how lucky I am and don’t know what I did to deserve to have so many rich beautiful friendships with the best people in the world. I have my freedom. My life is my own and I’m taking that so seriously. God.