let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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@sylphrenaskaladin
(Source: me)
This is the perfect explanation
i also struggle with the reverse of this. I will make (what I think is) a simple observation or mild complaint and various listeners will think I'm asking them to do something about it
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this is so wild
Narration, in a serious, dramatic voice: We find no evidence paranormal activity inside this mine, but we do find an absolutely adorable kitty kitty.
Person on screen, using a baby voice: Hi little kitty kitty! Hi little kitty kitty! Ohh, you’re just a little kitty kitty!
i need people to realize the narrator and the person using the baby voice are the same person.
Elf video games: 300 hour jrpgs with legions of characters and several novels worth of text. Labrynthine upgrade trees and customization options. The most insufferably unintuitive UI possible. A single turn based battle can take hours. Every character has an ennui stat.
Dwarf video games: Basebuilding strategy FPSs that has a whole wiki page on the flexile vs tensile strengths of different building materials. Dwarven rhythm games have minigames where you have to manage supply lines. Mortals cannot comprehend dwarven grand strategy games.
Halfling video games: What appears on the surface to be a viscerally calming farming sim is actually an extraordinarily complex social combat game about cutthroat HOA politics.
Goblin video games: Wildly unbalanced collectathon gatchas where half the fun is finding new hilariously broken strategies. Zany uberviolent team shooters about bugs. MOBAs so bad it's almost art.
Orc video games: Addictive in-browser flash games with names like "Beast Crush 4" and "Borag Meat Game." The art is always kinda bad but in a charming way. The music always slaps.
Goblin code looks incomprehensible but if you take the time to look through it, you realize it's actually optimized in ways you never thought were even possible. Goblins are responsible for like 75% of every games modding community. Goblins all run Linux.
There is no orc game larger than a gigabyte. There are legends of an orc coder who successfully ran DOOM on a raw lamb shank.
Halfling code is full of charming little comments like "//whew! This routine was a real nut to optimize" that you eventually come to learn are expressions of deep, murderous rage.
Elf code rhymes.
The one noise you'll hear from my apartment when I get my fiddler crabs
We should be fine as long as we do not reblog bread.
Question.
I’ve rebogged bread.
I have done nothing but reblog bread for the past three days.
Where, where have you been sending it?!
I love how there are more reblogs than likes
This post. This fucking post. I cannot believe after nearly 7 years its still going around. Let alone ON MY OWN DASH! A kid born on the day i posted this would be entering 2nd grade right now.
Oh no guys, you won’t believe what’s occurred-
Ah fuck lads, my hand slipped
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D&D campaign but all the dungeon puzzles are old Putnam problems
Legislation that passed unanimously would end the practice of setting clocks back one hour in the fall. Its prospects were uncertain in the
this is so fuckign funny. rubio just walked into the senate chamber and said “this is bullshit, right?” and partisan divisions were healed
heartbreaking: worst person you know makes a good point
ladies we need to start frantically and obsessively reading books in less than 24 hours again..remember how happy we were
“don’t eat honey because it exploits the bees and they can’t consent!!!” bees are literally unionized and will walk out if they don’t like being in the beekeeper’s hives
It's true.
I worked with a beekeeper (not at beekeeping, guy had a day job as a machinist and kept bees as a side thing). One day there was a swarm in the parking lot and people were freaking out because, y'know, BEES EVERYWHERE. Beekeeper guy went to his truck. Pulled a swarm-catching box out. Put it on the ground and walked away. Bees went in the box after a while. Guy put the box back in his truck and drove home with them.
You cannot prevent bees from leaving a hive they don't like the conditions of, without also preventing them from being able to make honey. The latter is dependent on them being able to come and go as they please. If they don't like their hive THEY WILL LEAVE.
Beekeeping is probably the single most non-exploitative animal agriculture in the entirety of human history. I don't know how it's even possible to exploit bees. They answer only to their queen.
They absolutely do not answer to the queen. If she sucks they will kill her and make a new one.
The queen is taking too long to die. I think we should send Christopher Eccleston in
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
my fatal flaw is that if i don't want to do something i just won't do it like mama raised a quitter for sure.. i'll be doing something and suddenly be like damn what if i just didn't 🤔. very freeing but also i suffer so many consequences
i am aware that a caterpillar is not a grub
“little things”
a comic i made about a conversation i had with myself
Tonight on My Husband Doesn’t Know How to Baby Talk
“Ma’am, are you aware that these, right here are your hands? They belong to you. And you get to decide what happens with them. So when you use these hands to pull your binky out of your mouth that is not necessarily a dad problem. I’ll fix it obviously i just want you to acknowledge it’s not my fault”
Husband: ma’am it has been reported lately that you do in fact have tiny little toes and a little button nose, do you care to comment?
Penny Rose: Babbles in Baby
Husband: RIVETING!
Penny Rose: Does that High Pitched Baby Yell ™️
Husband: Let it out friend! Feel your feelings!
Me: Hehehe silly husband doesn’t know how to do baby talk
All of tumblr collectively at my husband:
Penny Rose: does a sad baby scream
Husband: you don’t even have to understand taxes yet! I can explain them but you’ve got several years before that’s relevant!
Penny Rose: wide eyes, staring at her father, almost intrigued
Husband: I lied to you Penny your mother does our taxes. Do you want to know about arbitration? I know all about arbitration.
THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND
yes he just walks around the house and talks to her like this
Penny Rose: Cooing as twinkle twinkle little star plays
Husband: Now Penny there is a lot of misinformation out there in the world and I hate to tell you this but the moon is in fact not made of cheese. That is a conspiracy theory pushed by Big Dairy.
????
Husband: Holds Penny Rose up to her reflection in the microwave
Husband: you see Penny Rose! This was the M. Night Shyamalan twist! You were mirror baby all along!
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I just got a car and started driving again so I was thinking about some safety things for D/deaf/HoH drivers. One huge concern is the possibility of being pulled over and encountering the police.
I have a magnet similar to this on my car in case of that situation
I also keep a notepad and pen in my glove box with my insurance card and registration. I keep everything is in one place so I won’t have to reach around and look like i’m searching for “something”
—-
I also found this article with more information—
https://www.aarp.org/health/conditions-treatments/info-2016/deaf-driver-safety-police-kb.html
Drivers with hearing loss should be extra cautious when pulled over by the police, as a recent tragedy in North Carolina reminds us. We have
Too many deaf folks have been killed by police, already. Stay safe!
(Hearing people are encouraged to reblog)
I also have a Deaf Driver card
mine is from Gallaudet, so all the information is for DC but its still effective to let an officer know you’re d/Deaf no matter where you are. It goes in the visor of whatever car I’m driving.
Spread this like butter on cornbread.
twitter thread
9.22.21 Minnesota
NEW: Minnesota police are using brutal physical violence and “pain compliance” against water protectors and Line 3 pipeline protestors. The torture tactics have left some activists with partial facial paralysis.
Enbridge Energy, the multinational corporation building the tar sands oil pipeline, is funding the police who torture, harass, and surveil protestors opposing Line 3. Enbridge has now paid police & sheriffs in Minnesota $2 million to protect the pipeline.
Police have also used tear gas and rubber bullets against the unarmed protestors. Tara Houska (@zhaabowekwe) with the @giniwcollective spoke to Vice about the extreme force law enforcement have used to squash Line 3 protests.
Last week, the Minnesota Department of Natural Resources fined Enbridge $3.3 million for breaching an aquifer during Line 3 construction, releasing over 24 million gallons of groundwater.
