⊰ 精美 ⊱

please feel free to turn any ask responses or memes into threads, chats, or plot inspirations if you should so wish.

                       yes, i am trash. i’ve reached my next hundred aND IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS                       GIVEAWAY. it’s  nothing  special  but  giveaways  excite  me  because  i’m  so                        thankful to each and every one of my followers and now i can give back in some                       way or another.                       same  rules  apply;  must  be a roleplay account, you must be following me - do                       not unfollow me after pls and thank you, likes and reblogs count.

                                     somewhere between 1 - 3 people will win whatever they want! 

                                                                                    ends ; april 19th

                                                                             themes ; ╳  ╳  ╳  ╳                                                                             self promos ; ╳  ╳  ╳                                                                       online/offline banners ;  ╳  ╳  ╳                                                                                      icons ;

“I mistook you for my best friend and jumped on your back in public and now I’m embarrassed” au

“we’re playing the same music quartet and you keep glaring at me from across the set-up and I don’t know why” au

“I’m a jeweler and you always come in to buy stuff so I assume you have you have a significant other and don’t hit on you, but it turns out you’re just really nice to your mom” au

“you’re a delivery person and why do you always order so much STUFF” au

“I work at Starbucks and you come in so often that I know your daily order and write encouraging notes on your cup” au

“I work at a sex toy shop and you come in frequently so I assume you have a significant other, but you just like coming in to make fun of how weird the toys are” au

“you work at a museum and I like to come by a lot in my free time and wait why do you seem to follow me around from exhibit to exhibit” au

“we both like walking in the park at night and I think you’re a stalker so I accidentally attack you and give you a black eye sorry” au

“we met through mutual friends and you call me a different name but I don’t have the heart to correct you” au

“you work at a botanical garden and when I go, I get stung by a bee and have an allergic reaction and you accompany me to the hospital because no one else will” au

“I’m a bartender and I have to cut you off after a certain amount because you’re drinking to forget your ex and I end up calling you a cab” au

“you’re dressed as the easter bunny at our town’s easter egg hunt and I take my younger sibling, but she’s afraid of people in costumes and you accidentally make her cry and you take off the bunny head to apologize and hey you’re kinda cute” au

“you were a child actor in that one TV show that I can’t remember the name of and I can’t stop staring at you I’m so sorry I’m just trying to figure this out” au

“we follow each other on instagram but don’t know each other that well and I was snooping through and liked a picture from 176 weeks ago oh god” au

“we live in adjacent apartments and the walls are really thin, so I hear you sing every morning in the shower at 6:30 and you’re actually really good and I stand next to the wall and sing the next lyric just to see what would happen” au

“we live in the same apartment complex and I accidentally leave my laundry in the washer for a minute too long and you decide to take out all my wet clothes to put in yours just as I walk in” au

Reblog if you’re OC friendly.

Not ‘ i say i’m OC friendly but don’t even glance at OC’s ‘

Not ‘ yeah but they have to have 3 about pages 5 graphics and sacrifice 6 virgins ‘

Not ‘ make an OC read all my pages and not look at theirs ‘

Not ‘ i file ALL OC’s into the godmodding horrible type and only rp with OC’s whose muns are my friends. ‘

I know people want to pussy-foot around some of these unspoken things, but I think that’s what causes more miscommunication on this site than anything. I am brutal.  I’m bullet pointing these so there is no confusion. I feel sweetie-pie talk sends mixed signals for all.

Not every one will like you.

My rule of thumb is: If someone blatantly ignores you more than three times…or always…Leave them alone. This isn’t referring to when someone you are good pals with is ignoring your asks because they are backlogged, or not in the mood for the ask, this is referring to someone you hardly know, or don’t know at all, that you’re sending many things to. And if they truly act as if you aren’t there? And not responding to your attempts? Chances are, they want you to leave them be. Please stop yourself, no matter how much you want to interact with their muse. You are humiliating yourself and probably driving them crazy. Some people here are either shy introverts that avoid public confrontation, or, like me—Where you’ve explained it in rules over and over, and have in the past told people: “I’m sorry, but no thanks, nothing personal.” and were met with hate and bitterness. So you just don’t respond at all to avoid that drama again and again.  In fact, ignoring you may not even be about you or your muse, but they are super pressured in real life, and feel high anxiety when they see the same person they do not know (or are extremely casual about talking to) constantly poking them morning, noon, and night. Not everyone is hyper-diper and ready to chit chat at warp speed. Some of us unwind on here after a hectic day surrounded by toxic people at work, school, and home. The need to gradually open drafts, look at our dash, and respond to messages from people we owe at a casual pace is how we feel good. And sometimes? Your muse is everything that they want to avoid in a relaxing atmosphere. I play a Chaos Goddess, not everyone wants their muse to be f’ed in the a’ by a spoiled discordian. Or, maybe you play with someone they don’t like, and they don’t want to be seen on your blog. It’s not always cruelty. SO. Leave them be. Find people that will respond to you! Put your energy toward that instead of beating a dead horse.

Your opinions are out there forever. 

Careful what you say to people if you are not strong enough to take their retort or rebuking of your fandom opinions, character opinions, faceclaim opinions,  rp opinions, or general personal opinions you insert onto your roleplaying blog. Some people will be civil and discuss maturely how they disagree, but most people will resort to name calling and stupid commentary, insulting your intelligence and calling you a child. (When they themselves are probably younger than you and have less life experience.) It’s the law of the jungle everywhere, nothing will change this. Bare in mind, even if you turn over a new leaf and start to back-pedal your old ways and become a more positive, open, forgiving soul in your fandom, people never forget, so be careful before you start slinging your manure everywhere. No matter how many post deletes and funky URL changes you make, people will remember you. So unless you can take the heat, don’t put it out there. 

Don’t assume we’re all coming from the same place.

This is the most important thing, and we’ve all forgotten it!! No matter our age, background, innocence, or cynicism, we’ve allllllllll forgotten this, and I’ll bet we all think about it for a hot minute, then shrug our shoulders and continue to not care about it. (Myself included) Not everyone is stable, and not everyone is who they say they are. Not everyone is stable, and not everyone is who they say they are. Not everyone is stable, and not everyone is who they say they are. I’m not talking about the stereotypical “58 year old stalkers trying to get an underage kid to meet them in a park somewhere.” I’m talking about, different life experiences and other mental issues that could be faked or true, but you will never know the truth for sure, unless you actually know the person you’re talking to in real life. People can lie about all sorts of things, good and bad, and although you don’t want to be a cold, lonely person, understand people fake identities and issues they believe in, on the computer every moment.  IE: I have an ex-uncle (by marriage, not blood) that used to laugh with delight on how he “posed as a lesbian” and went into chat-rooms to mess with the women there…get them to think they met a cool chick, then “bust them” and tell them how stupid they were. Among other…horrible things. He did this with political websites, and spiritual websites too. He’s a grade A sociopath. I am disgusted in everything about this. The net is worldwide, and yes, the beauty of this is that friends are to be made from everywhere in the world, and they do exist, whereas just 20-some years ago, this was an impossible feat. But that also means unstable sociopaths are out there too. Don’t post your mental breakdowns publicly, they prey on it. We all get causal with our followers and feel like family over time, and we ALL give in and post about how we are depressed or are struggling with something super personal. But this is dangerous. Post a call out that you need to talk to someone you trust instead. If no one’s around, type it out in a wordpad, get it off your chest, and delete it, but never POST IT. Face it, not everyone that follows you has good intentions. Some people follow JUST so they can send hate. And if you’re someone that never protects yourself, and you leave anon and submit on 24-7, you’ve just left your front door open at night while you’re laying butt naked in the middle of your living room floor. Come on. Delete and block them, no matter what. NO real friend would send you hate. GET RID OF THEM.

It’s not that serious, slow down.

It’s not that serious if you don’t agree with someone’s rp style, their character, or what they post. In the long run, you should just walk away. What’s offensive today will mean nothing next week, and I guarantee 5 years from now, you won’t even think about it unless in vague memory.  I understand if someone posts a LOT of offensive material that makes you uncomfortable? But just UN-follow or block them. Seriously, people the block function exists for a reason. Blacklist is dodge-y, and if you truly are messed up over someone’s page content, block it. You can always go into settings later if you change your mind about them, to un-block them. Sometimes we get SO offended by fandom opinions we feel the need to gossip and spread negativity about that person when all they did was disagree with you. Perhaps they rp in a way that annoys you. So what. Move on. Look away. You don’t have to rp with them and you don’t have to care about them either. If you walk into a movie theater, and sit down among 150 people, do you care about everyone’s opinion for that 2 hour period? No. How about after you leave the theater? Nope? Then that’s how it should be. Treat rp like that. This is when I get the proverbial:  “But no, you’re wrong! Sometimes you have to argue with them! I hate them, they have to pay, everyone has to know what a horrible person they are, you’re wrong!! you don’t get it!!!! I’m saving my friends from them!!!!!” No. You don’t get it. This is pretend writing fun time, and none of us are getting paid for it. Your friends can handle themselves, and frankly, who the HELL are you to tell your friends who they can and can’t be friends/rp with? Some people get along excellently with people I do not. It’s the same for all of us. Things that piss you off today won’t matter one little bit a year from now. And if it does? Please, do yourself a favor and maybe back off and give yourself a time out.  NOW: I’m not talking about plagiarism and people that steal headcanons and writing styles word-for-word. I’m talking about petty rp-”wars” over formatting vs. no formatting, partner sharing, shipping style, those of us that cross-over vs. those that stick to one fandom. People that say one fandom is stupid over another, people that send hate over who you chose to write with or ship with. Whether your blog smuts frequently or not at all. OC vs. Canon. We all don’t eat the same flavors daily, we all have our own tastes, it’s not that serious. It’s irritating as hell when someone differs greatly from you, sure, but it’s not the end of the world. And it’s their funtime as much as yours! Save your creative energy for your blog and your muses. 

[MSG:] What if you jacked off onto some soil and then some humans started sprouting?

[MSG:] I heard a grown man yell from somewhere else in the motel, “GODDAMMIT, MR. NOODLE.”

[MSG:] For the last time, we are not naming our child “Actual Proof I Lost My Virginity!”

[MSG:] What’s life without a pregnancy scare?

[MSG:] There’s a man dressed as Jack Sparrow walking around the train station…

[MSG:] WHAT THE HELL GOES ON WHEN I’M NOT AROUND IN THIS HOUSE?!

[MSG:] I got a masters degree in being ignored.

[MSG:] If I see another metaphor I’m gonna kill someone.

[MSG:] We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcakes. We have the perfect relationship.

[MSG:] He sneezed into my face mid-kiss.

[MSG:] When you say “bless your heart” do you mean “bless your heart” or “you’re a fucking dumbass”?

[MSG:] I’ve really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.

[MSG:] Well, PukeFest 2k14 just happened.

[MSG:] We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.

[MSG:] The highlight of the evening is when you jacked off to a picture of your seventh grade math teacher in front of a room full of undergrad students.

[MSG:] No worries, I’ve prioritized my homework into “can do drunk” and “should be sober” categories. We’re good.

[MSG:] I’m giving head in a stairwell, I’ll be back in a few minutes. I’m so ashamed.

[MSG:] With a MELON?!

[MSG:] I can only rely on you and Taco Bell.

[MSG:] Last night, justice was obtained. Justice, and a Slim Jim.

[MSG:] I just shaved the Batman symbol into my pubes.

[MSG:] Any explanations about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?

[MSG:] Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That’s my life now.

[MSG:] It’ll be a “that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor” party.

[MSG:] I’m like the Sherlock Holmes of figuring out people’s sexual fetishes.

[MSG:] Would “deck the halls with penises ” be an appropriate event title?

[MSG:] My grandma just told me that size does matter, and don’t let anyone tell you anything different.

[MSG:] Don’t ask questions. I got your number from my friend. I understand you’ve got your eye on [name]. Take it from someone who knows… not the best idea.

[MSG:] Stop selling my mother weed! She’s annoying as hell when she’s stoned.

[MSG:] Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?

[MSG:] Homecoming’s not even over, and already 3 people have been caught smoking weed, 9 people have been caught having sex (including 1 threesome), 2 people have puked, and at least 10 people have grinded on a teacher by mistake. Go, class of 2014.

[MSG:] I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.

[MSG:] I’m giving my fifteen year old sister blowjob advice. This is probably illegal somewhere.

[MSG:] I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of “Bikini Profile Picture” season.

[MSG:] Okay, so maybe it wasn’t the most ETHICAL method, but hey! Free margaritas!

[MSG:] Someone in this bar yelled “OI, SLUT!” and I automatically looked up.

[MSG:] I’m laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.

[MSG:] YOU SAID YOUR MOM DIDN’T KNOW. THE “CONGRATS ON TAKING MY CHILD’S VIRGINITY” CAKE SHE GAVE ME SAYS OTHERWISE.

[MSG:] Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?

[MSG:] I’m pretty sure that pic you just sent me was meant for someone else. At least,I hope it was.

[MSG:] No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we’ll call it even.

[MSG:] I stopped you from sending your teacher nude pics last night. Once you sober up, you owe me, BIG TIME.

[MSG:] Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.

[MSG:] You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake. It was impressive.

[MSG:] He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.

[MSG:] Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka.

[MSG:] That audition I went to? Turned out to be for porn.

[MSG:] Can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?

[MSG:] It was weird. Like “Mom, Dad, here’s a guy who knows my orgasm face”.

[MSG:] He may still have my jacket, but I still have his virginity so who’s the real winner here?

[MSG:] Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk.

[MSG:] It’s two AM, I’m high as shit, I can’t find my pants, and my car has a flat tire. STOP TEXTING ME YOUR DICK PICS.

[MSG:] You know that hottie I landed in the bar last week and promised to call and then proceeded to never call again? Turns out she’s the boss at my new job. FML

[MSG:] Pro tip: sex on a waterbed is not as good as an idea as it sounds.

[MSG:] COPS ARE COMING. WARN THE OTHERS.

[MSG:] I don’t care how ugly she is, I can’t turn down a free movie and blowjob. In this economy that’s downright irresponsible.

[MSG:] You’re the third person to ever have sex with me. (Well, for free.)

[MSG:] I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse.

[MSG:] Um, that’s called prostitution.

[MSG:] There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.

[MSG:] I think she’s perpetually drunk.

[MSG:] ABORT ABORT ABORT I LOOKED HER UP SHE’S A SUBSTITUTE TEACHER AT OUR SCHOOL ABORT

[MSG:] It’s called “lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year.”

[MSG:] That’s your strangest euphemism for “blowjob” yet.

[MSG:] I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.