𝐌𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢❀

≡ INDEX CHAPTER LIST: 

‣ CHAPTER 1: BARDO MANSPLAINING & BULLIES ‣ CHAPTER 2: FORGOTTEN ESSAYS & FADED MEMORIES ‣ CHAPTER 3: ECHOES & EXPECTATIONS ‣ CHAPTER 4: MISSED CALLS & MISSING GIRLS ‣ CHAPTER 5: DATES & DREADED TRUTHS ‣ CHAPTER 6: COLD & CRUEL TIMINGS ‣ CHAPTER 7: SECRETS & SLEEPLESS NIGHTS ‣ CHAPTER 8: CONCLUSIONS & CONFESSIONS ‣ CHAPTER 9: HEARTACHES & HOPE ‣ CHAPTER 10: ALMOSTS & AFTERMATHS

‣ BACK TO: MASTERLIST

A heavy, leather gym bag flew across the room, smashing into the water cooler. Water erupted across the floor. The entourage scrambled backward, slamming the door shut behind them.

Then, there was only the sound of his ragged breathing.

Jungkook was huge. The papers called him a heavyweight talented mad dog. His broad shoulders heaved under the sheen of sweat and bruised skin, his knuckles, even wrapped in blood-stained tape, looked lethal.

Slowly, his dark, blown-out pupils drifted through the room until they locked onto you.

"You're still here," he spat, stepping into your space. The heat radiating off him was oppressive.

"I am," you said softly, keeping your tone perfectly level. Monotone. Unbothered. It was the only armor you had.

"Why?" He loomed over you, his shadow swallowing you whole. "You love seeing me like this, don't you? Fucking happy that the great Jeon Jungkook finally hit the canvas."

You didn't answer. You stepped forward, entirely bypassing his glaring gaze, and reached up. Your small, pale hands contrasted sharply against the brutalized canvas of his body as you began to unlace his boxing gloves.

He didn't stop you, but he didn't make it easy either, keeping his forearms tense as iron bars.

This was the dance you had performed for a year. While five previous assistants had quit within their first week, driven out by his temper, his flying fists, and his verbal cruelty, you had stayed. Because to you, this Jungkook wasn't a shock.

You had known him back at school and at university. Back then, before the millions he made and the championship belts, he had been the school’s golden boy bully, and you had been his favorite target. He used to knock your books out of your hands just to watch you scramble on the floor. Now, he threw gym bags and water coolers.

The stage had changed, the years had passed, but the monster remained exactly the same. And ironically, knowing the worst of him from before was exactly why you were the only one who could survive him currently.

"Eat," you murmured, nodding toward the meal prep container sitting on the bench. "Steak, sweet potatoes, greens. I prepared it three hours ago."

Jungkook let out a dark, mocking laugh, the sound scraping against his throat. With a brutal swipe of his wrapped hand, he sent the container flying. The grilled steak and vegetables scattered across the dirty floor, mixing with the spilled water.

"I don't want your fucking food," he growled, stepping closer until his chest almost brushed your nose. "I just lost a split decision to a nobody, Y/N. My career is crumbling right now, and you're handing me a Tupperware container?"

You looked down at the ruined food, then back up into his eyes. There was a raw, dangerous flash of darkness in his gaze, the same look he used to give you in the high school hallways before making your life hell. He wanted a reaction. He starved for you to scream, to cry, to give him a reason to shatter the rest of the room.

"I will clean it up," you said, your voice entirely devoid of emotion. "And then I will prepare another one. Because tomorrow at 5:00 AM, you have roadwork. And if your body lacks glycogen, you will lag. And if you lag, you will lose again."

The word lose struck him like a physical blow.

Jungkook’s jaw clenched so hard a vein throbbed in his temple. He grabbed your upper arm, his grip rough that would undoubtedly leave bruises on your skin by morning. He pulled you flush against him, forcing you to look up at his face, a cut above his eyebrow was leaking a slow trail of blood down his cheek.

"You think you're so smart," he whispered, his breath hot against your lips. "You think because you knew me when I was a kid, you can predict me? You’re just a maid, Y/N. A glorified servant I hired because nobody else could stomach the sight of me."

"I am," you agreed, refusing to let your voice show the deep rooted fear you have towards him. "I am exactly what you pay me to be. Now, let me get the ice."

For a long, agonizing moment, he didn't move. The tension in the room was a living, breathing entity, thick with a year's worth of unspoken history and dark, twisted codependency. He hated that he needed you. He hated that you were the only person in his entire empire who didn't look at him with fear or greed—just a cold, unyielding perception.

Slowly, his grip loosened. Not out of kindness, but out of a sudden, exhausted defeat.

He sat onto the leather bench, burying his face in his wrapped hands. The great, terrifying Jeon Jungkook looked small for a fraction of a second, swallowed by the silence of the locker room.

You didn't offer words of comfort. You didn't tell him he did his best. You knew him too well for that. Instead, you grabbed a fresh cloth, wet it with ice water, and stepped between his heavy thighs.

Gently, firmly, you pressed the cloth to the bleeding cut on his eyebrow.

Jungkook flinched, his eyes snapping open, burning into yours. But he didn't pull away. He sat perfectly still, letting you clean the blood from his skin, his massive hands resting heavily on his knees, gripping the fabric of his shorts until his knuckles turned white.

He let out a long, ragged exhale, his eyes tracking the movement of your lips before shifting back to your unreadable eyes. "You really hate me, don't you?"

You pulled the cloth away, throwing it into the laundry bin with a dull thud. You grabbed his gym bag and slung it over your shoulder.

"I don't have the luxury of hating you, Jungkook," you said, looking back at him over your shoulder. "I'm on the clock."

The rhythmic, bone-deep thud-thud-thud of leather tearing into the sandbag had been the sole soundtrack to your night.

It was 4:15 AM. Jungkook's private gym was illuminated only by the harsh, buzzing fluorescent tubes directly above the boxing ring. The air was thick, hot, and smelled heavily of sweat, iron, and a desperate, toxic pride.

He hadn't slept. You knew this because you hadn't slept either. You had spent the last six hours in the adjacent breakroom, monitoring his vitals via the smart-tracker synced to your tablet. You watched his heart rate spike into dangerous, red-lined zones hours ago, staying there like a flatline of pure fury.

Now, you stood at the edge of the mat. In your hands, you held a fresh gallon of electrolyte water and a cold compress.

Jungkook was a vision of raw, unchecked self-destruction. His shirt was long gone, discarded somewhere in the dark corners of the room. His massive back, mapped with thick, dense muscles that was slick with a layer of sweat. He was throwing combinations at the heavy leather sandbag—brutal, terrifying shots that echoed through the empty facility like gunfire.

"You should take a rest," you said. Your voice was flat, cutting through the heavy, rhythmic violence of the gym.

He didn't even acknowledged you. A sharp punch rattled the heavy steel chains anchoring the bag to the ceiling. Crack.

"Jungkook—"

"Shut the fuck up!" he growled, his voice a gravelly bark. He didn't break his rhythm. He threw a devastating right cross, the sheer velocity of the impact violently distorting the shape of the dense sandbag. He was punching with enough force to shatter his own bones, completely disregarding the fact that his hands had been wrapped for nearly twelve hours straight.

You took a deliberate step forward, standing between him and the sandbag.

"You pay me to ensure you have exactly what it takes to win," you said, looking him dead in his bloodshot eyes. "I am doing the job I am paid for. You need to do a lot of things if you want that belt back, Jungkook. And it starts with resting."

Jungkook’s chest heaved, his ribs expanding violently as he fought for oxygen. The sheer size of him was overwhelming up close; dense, unyielding muscle locked and right now, every single inch of him was vibrating with a dangerous warning, he didn't mind punching you.

"I pay you to follow my fucking orders," he snarled. "Don't forget your fucking place."

Before you could draw a breath, his wrapped hand shot out, grabbing you by the collar of your shirt. His damp, sweat-soaked hair fell over his eyes, casting his face in shadow, making him look less like a man and more like a monster, a real mad dog, an effect only amplified by the staggering size difference between you.

You didn't flinch. You looked straight through the curtain of his hair, into his dark, burning eyes.

"You used to be aggressive back in school because it was the only way you knew how to grab attention," you said, your voice steady, hitting him with the precise weapon of your shared history. "And now you're doing it again. You're rough, you're aggressive, pushing your body to the edge because you're terrified that no one will ever look at you if it wasn't for your wins."

Jungkook growled, a low, animalistic sound tearing from his throat. With terrifying ease, he lifted you off the floor by your collar, driving you backward until your spine hit the concrete wall. Your toes barely scraped the floor.

"What did you just say?" His voice was laced with a cocktail of self-hatred, the agony of defeat, exhaustion, and above all, pure spite that the quiet, weak girl he used to bully was the one stripping him naked to his core.

"You heard me—"

BOOM.

His free fist slammed into the concrete right beside your head, the shockwave vibrating through the wall and into your skull. He didn't let go of your collar. Instead, the hand he had just cracked against the wall shifted, his large, taped fingers gripping your jaw tightly, forcing your face up.

"Don't act so strong," he whispered, his hot, ragged breath wiping across your skin, "when we both know how fucking pathetic you are."

"I know exactly how pathetic I am, Jungkook," you retorted, refusing to let the trembling in your bones reach your voice. You reached up, your small hands wrapping around the thick wrist holding your jaw. "I live with it. I face it every day, and that's why I'm stronger than you. You can't even face a single loss. Please..."

He clenched his jaw, his thumb pressing dangerously hard into your cheekbone.

"I hate you," you whispered, looking past the beast to the boy who used to ruin your childhood. "But I hate seeing you lose this pathetically even more. So let me do my job. Let the coach do his. Allow your body to actually get ready to win. Because your loss last night wasn't because of weakness. No you are pure muscle Jungkook, a real mad dog. But... your ego was just too high to notice the hit coming."

For a long, agonizing second, the gym fell completely silent. The only sound was the erratic, heavy thudding of his heart beneath his ribs. You could feel the raw tremor in his grip—not from weakness, but from the sheer, exhausting effort it took to keep himself from breaking you. He wanted to break something. He wanted to break you. But the absolute truth in your words had pierced through him.

Slowly, his hand slipped from your collar, and your feet hit the solid ground again.

He didn't walk away. He lowered his forehead until it rested against your shoulder, his massive, sweating body slumped against yours, letting his dead weight lean into you. It was an incredibly heavy, stifling embrace, born out of pure exhaustion and a toxic, twisted dependency he would never admit to.

"If I lose the rematch," Jungkook muttered, his voice muffled against the fabric of your shirt, dark and lethal, "I'll tear this whole place down. And I'll start with you."

"You won't lose," you said softly, your hands remaining on his wrists, feeling the heavy, steady pulse of the predator finally calming down.

“Lisa would give you the money back.” your son retorts.

“What’s going on?” you ask. You take your seatbelt off. “You’ve been quiet the entire ride home and now all of a sudden you want to quit?” 

You don’t mean to raise your voice at Ji-tae. It wasn’t him who had you at edge, it was Jungkook. The entire ride home, you had clenched the steering wheel so tightly that you were sure your palms would bleed. Your heart hadn’t stopped beating, either, and all you could think about was the look on Jungkook’s face as the elevator doors closed.

“I could ask you the same thing.” 

“Excuse me?” you snicker. You knew sooner or later, Ji-tae would be a teenager. Having a teenager meant dealing with the smart remarks that came with it.

“Nothing.”

When Ji-tae lifts his hand to open his door, you stop him. “We aren’t done talking.” you tell him. “Tell me what’s going on. Do you not enjoy it anymore?”

Ji-tae lowers his hand to his side. He looks at you fully now. “I do.” he says.

“Then why do you keep insisting on quitting?” you question. “I told you I can afford it now.”

Ji-tae swallows. His mind flashes with the older man - obviously your boss - sitting behind the desk. His eyes watching you, and then him.

“Tae…” you trail off. You knew your son enough to know that something was troubling him. 

“Are you sleeping with him?”

The car grows quiet. You’re left stunned - far too stunned to form a sentence right now.

You hadn’t expected that to be your son's question. As your mind races, the pieces slowly begin to work. It explained the look on your son's face when he stared at you, and then to Jungkook. The glare in his eyes…

No parent wants to be in your shoes right now. You feel so small in your son's gaze, one that resemblances Jungkook far too much for you to handle right now.

“You are.” Ji-tae deadpans.

“Tae,” you sigh, closing your eyes. “What-”

“That’s how you’re paying for it, right?” your son interrupts, his voice rising. “That’s how you got this car, too?”

“Tae - Tae!”

You get out of the car just as Ji-tae does. You slam the door behind you, not even bothering to lock it. You follow him right into the apartment. “Stop-”

“If that’s what you have to do to pay for everything then-”

“Didn’t I tell you to stop?!” you hiss at your son, your tone low and full of anger - but not at him. At yourself for putting your son in this position. Ji-tae may be young, yes, but he wasn’t dumb nor naive - especially not how you were when you were his age. He was highly aware of the world he lived in, even if he didn't speak it aloud.

Now, Ji-tae probably saw you differently. 

“I told you to stop worrying about shit that doesn’t concern you!” you continue. Sometimes, you think the way you speak to your son, and the way he responds to you, isn’t that of a mother and son. You could blame that on teen pregnancy.

Ji-tae snickers. “It does concern me. If you’re sleeping with him to pay-”

“Stop.” you hiss, eyes widening at him. “It’s…complicated, Tae…” you take a deep breath. “You’re too young to understand it.” 

You lean against the closed front door and sigh. Jumping into an abyss would be easier than having this conversation with a 13 year old.

“I’m old enough.” Ji-tae retorts. 

You snort. You tilt your head a bit as you peer at your son. You lick your lips, your throat clogging up. 

“I’m old enough to know that you look like you’re about to…cry.” Ji-tae murmurs. His shoulders slump a bit and now he feels remorseful. Maybe he should take your advice and remain his age - a part of him wants to. The other part of him hears his grandmother's words and her condescending tone telling him that you couldn’t afford the luxuries you give him - not without that job. In such a short amount of time, you’ve given him everything he’s asked for and more. You surprised him with a new gaming system, along with the overly expensive gaming chair you’ve remembered him speaking about.

But Ji-tae knows that he’ll gladly give it all aways if it meant you didn’t have to do what he’s suspect you are doing.

“I don’t want you to hate me.” you respond.

Sometimes you felt like it was your son who was the parent. You blame it on you being nothing but a dumb teenager when you had him, forced to grow up entirely too fast that you skipped the pivotal chapters. He was far wiser than anyone you’ve met his age, a trait you knew he hadn’t gotten from you.

“I don’t hate you.” Ji-tae swallows. “I don't want you to be taken advantage of, either.”

“You look just like him, you know? Your eyes were probably clouded with so much animosity that you hadn’t seen it.”

You make your way towards the kitchen. You could go for a drink right now, but you've decided that you’ll have to live with the self-pity for just a bit longer.

Ji-tae hovers in the door frame of said kitchen. He’s silent, replaying what you said in his mind.

“You said you’re old enough, right?” you ask. Ji-tae is eerily silent. “That’s Jungkook. He’s…your father.”

The word father coming from your lips sounds entirely too foreign.

There was a time that Ji-tae had asked about his father. He was only 7, you recall, and older than when you expected him to ask. You thought you prepared yourself for this moment, but even after he has asked you such an innocent question, you were left stunned for longer than you should’ve.

 “You don’t have a dad..” Ji-tae pointed out, his small hand in yours as you and he strolled home from school. It’s an activity he remembers enjoying because it meant you and he could stop for ice cream. It was only when he was older did he realize why you never got yourself any.

You laughed at how blunt children could be. “I do.” you told him. 

“Grandma says he’s in the ground.”

You nodded your head slowly. Your father wasn’t dead, he was just dead to your mother.

“Is my dad in the ground-”

“No!” you quipped. “He’s…just not around right now.”

It was the only explanation you’ve given Ji-tae and even then he took it. He hadn’t asked again, even if you told yourself that if he did, you’d explain it better to him. A part of you wished that you had more time but 6 years was enough time for you to say something to him.

Now, however, Ji-tae isn’t saying anything. He stands in the doorway and peers at you with familiar dark eyes that you weren’t sure you could handle.

“Tae,” you begin. “I didn’t-”

“Grandmother said you didn’t know who he was.”

You roll your eyes, because of course your mother would tell him that. You ponder how long your son sat and thought about you in a certain light.

“I did.” your teeth grits. “And if she was truly paying attention to who I brought in, she’d know, too.” you murmur, more to yourself than to Ji-tae.

 While you were more involved in your son's life - his interests, friends, hobbies and all - your mother gave you the freedom to do whatever. You’re positive she regretted it in the end.

Ji-tae is quiet again, but his eyebrows knit together.

“Whats on your mind?” you ask him. 

“So what?” your son shrugs his shoulders. “Why is he here now? Did he offer you this job out of pity or something?”

“What?” you shake your head. “Tae-”

“He wasn’t around for 13 years, ma. You don’t have to go back and do that-”

You close your eyes and take a deep breath. Your body warms with hot embarrassment at how conscious your son could be. Sometimes, though you’re grateful that he isn’t, you’d wish he’d be like the other boys his age and worry about childish things.

“Tae, stop.” you interrupt. “I don’t want you to,” you swallow, eyes fluttering open to look at your son. Your heart jolts. “hate him.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” your son snorts.

“Because,” 

Ji-tae knows that when you bounce your leg it means that you’re nervous. You always tend to avoid his eyes.

“he didn’t know about you.”

There isn’t any weight lifted from your shoulders like you wished there would be.

“We drifted apart. I got pregnant, and he went to college.” you deadpan. “I never told him about the pregnancy. I never thought I’d see him again.” you admitted. “I didn’t know he’d be who he was today. I didn’t know it was his company I was interviewing for.”

In front of Jungkook, the clouds appear like an ocean full of cotton, the sky a fiery pink and purple. The sun is setting and it glows intensively just outside his window. He watches it from his seat, only blinking when he feels his eyes grow dry.

Jungkook’s mind replays the last 13 years in his mind for any clues he may have not noticed until now. It’s easier to pinpoint when you fell pregnant as it was only one time, but when did you find out? Was it prior to graduation or after?

Ji-tae’s face flashes through his mind. The glaring look that he sends his way is far too obvious that he for one, didn’t know who he was, and for two, held great animosity for him.

Jungkook inhales deeply through his nose and closes his eyes for a bit. It appears that things with you were more complicated than he thought they were.

Just then, Jungkook’s ears perk at the sound of the elevator. “Lei…” he grumbles underneath his breath. “...I have enough surprises.”

Who Jungkook was hoping to see was you. He had gone through several scenarios in how he would approach this.

You were scared, obviously. You didn’t tell him because you yourself were afraid of how he’d react. It’s the reason why, for a while, you kept the pregnancy hidden. There were no records of you giving birth to Ji-tae because they were hidden.

Even if Jungkook was optimistic, there was still the lingering thought in his mind that told him you had hidden the pregnancy for the same reason you decided to ignore him all together. That thought alone plagued his thoughts and feeds on the insecurity he told himself he got rid of years ago.

You weren’t behind the door when Jungkook turns just as they open. Instead, it was Ji-tae again. He doesn’t step inside and the uncertain look on his face tells Jungkook that even he hadn’t thought about what he’d say.

Jungkook peers inside the elevator to find that he’s alone. “Where’s Y/N?” he questions.

“Home.” Ji-tae responds quietly.

Jungkook blinks.

Ji-tae does, as well.

“You can come in.” suggests Jungkook awkwardly. “Does she know you’re here?”

Jungkook’s eyes capture the way Ji-tae runs a hand through his hair before hesitantly walking through the office. Instantly, his eyes soften at the realization that the younger boy knows more than he did when he left.

“No.” Ji-tae responds. “I snuck out.”

Just great, Jungkook thinks. At first, he thought your motherly instinct came natural to you when you interacted with Jinah. Instead, you had 13 years of experience on your belt that gave you a head start. Witnessing the worried expression on your face earlier only told Jungkook that it was a matter of time before you realized your son was gone.

“You shouldn’t have done that.” Jungkook rolls his leather seat out and prepares to sit. “She’ll be worried.”

“You don’t have to play the fatherly role.” Ji-tae retorts with a roll of his eyes. In that instinct, he saw you in the boy that resembles him.

Jungkook nods his head gently and says, “Do you want to sit?”

Jungkook motions for the leather seat on the opposite side of his desk. 

“You came all this way for a reason, right? What’s on your mind?”

Ji-tae finds it easier to talk where he’s standing - which is awkwardly by the closed elevator. He doesn’t realize the height Jungkook possesses until he does get closer, or the dark eyes that seem to follow him as he sits down. In that moment, he believes his mother is right about the resemblance he holds to this same man.

Jungkook sits down, as well. His office is far too quiet for his own liking.

“What’s going on between you and my mother?”

Straight to the point, Jungkook notes. Another thing he inherited from you.

“Well,” Jungkook begins. “she works-”

“I know you’re sleeping with her.” Ji-tae interrupts, and that shuts Jungkook right up. “I’m not sure if you gave her this job out of pity or-”

“Pity?” Jungkook is confused now. 

“Yes, pity.” Ji-tae swallows the lump in his throat. “I already told her she doesn’t need to pay for my classes anymore, so you can-”

“I didn’t hire your mother out of pity.” Jungkook interrupts the boy all together with a shake of his head. “I…what did she tell you about me?”

“What she told me is something I’m not sure I believe entirely.” Ji-tae murmurs. 

“And what are you unsure about?” Jungkook leans against the desk.

“If you truly had no idea about me at all.”

Jungkook is taken aback and he visibly winces. Ji-tae bites the inside of his cheek, thinking it’s something he shouldn’t have said.

“As I was walking away she said that,” Ji-tae takes a deep breath. “that you were already accepted at some college and she didn’t want to ruin it.”

Didn’t want to ruin it, Jungkook thinks. His foot begins to tap against the marble floor. His eyes blink a few times.

“Were you two dating?”

Ji-tae knows it isn’t any of his business truly, even if it was the reason why he was alive right now. However, a part of him doesn’t want to leave just yet.

“No. Not really.” Jungkook murmurs. 

“Oh…”

“I loved her.” Jungkook nods his head, leaning back against the chair. He feels exhausted in just a short amount of time. “I would’ve stayed if she told me.”

Ji-tae doesn’t know what to say, but before he has a chance to,  a loud ring sounds throughout the office. Immediately, he knows it’s you calling.

“I guess she found out I’m not home.” Ji-tae sighs, your name flashing on his phone.

“You should answer it. You don’t want to worry her.”

Ji-tae takes a glance at Jungkook. “She’s going to be pissed at me.” he mumbles. “Can you talk to her?”

Jungkook’s eyes widened a bit. A part of his heart softens at the request. The other side knows that you would be just as equally pissed at him as you were with Ji-tae. However, Jungkook nods his head and holds out his hand for the ringing phone.

When he answers, you’re already on the other side demanding where Ji-tae was and why in the world he would leave without letting her know.

“Y/N.” Jungkook speaks into the phone. Ji-tae watches as the yelling stops for a moment, his eyes hopeful. “He’s fine. Maybe we should all talk together.”

Time’s were once simpler, you recall, like the moments you’d sneak out with your own friends. 

It’s something you shouldn’t have done, but your mothers disregard gave you freedom a teenager shouldn’t have and you took advantage of it. 

At times, you could feel it; the wind blowing through your hair whenever you drove with the windows down. When you heard a particular song that you’d once belt at the top of your lungs alongside them. You could taste the cheap alcohol that was either stolen from your parents, or liquor stores. Sometimes both.

The first time you’ve been to Jungkook’s house was one of those nights. The streets were quiet as you stumbled into his backyard, a borrowed  pair of heels in your hand. The look on Jungkook’s face when he saw you at his window. “You shouldn’t be walking alone at night.” you recall him scolding you softly, a hand around your waist to assist you in coming in through his window. “You can’t be too loud, my brother’s room is right across from mine.”

You weren’t sure why you made your way to Jungkook’s house. It felt better than going home alone, you thought, or continuing to do dumb shit with your friends that teenagers had no business doing. You dropped your heels and tilted your head at Jungkook.

“Why aren’t you asleep?” you asked. “Jacking off again?”

The redness on Jungkook’s face is something you always found cute. It’s the reason why you often teased him to no end. You licked your lips, eyes glancing around Jungkook’s bedroom. Far tidier than you’d imagine a teenage boy's room to look. “You’re such a nerd.” you murmured to him upon witnessing a tall shelf with comic books and figurines on it.

“I wouldn’t be able to do your homework if I wasn’t one.” was Jungkook’s response. “I wasn’t jacking off.”

Your eyes turned back to Jungkook, his ears just as red as his cheeks. Maybe it’s the booze in your system that has you giggling uncontrollably, a hand over your lips. You plopped down onto his bed, snuggling yourself into his comforter. “I don’t believe you. Other boys are out and you’re in your room fucking your hand. It’s pathetic.”

You never believed your own words. You found Jungkook interesting, which was the reason you kept returning time and time again. It was more than using the boy to do your assignments and projects. With time, you enjoyed playing with Jungkook - if it was forcing him to smell your panties, sitting into his lap “innocently” to the point you felt an obvious bulge, or even forcing him to speak so demeaning to himself. 

However, it isn’t always that. You did like to hear Jungkook talk about things that he was passionate about. Video games, or certain movies - mainly marvel. He’d sit and explain an entire timeline to you that you actually listened to. It made you realize you didn’t have anything like that yourself that you were passionate about. 

“You’re probably right.” was Jungkook’s response. His eyes focused on the way your skirt rises up, his morality screaming to stop being so perverted. It was obvious you were far too intoxicated.

“You’re such a virgin.” you giggled. “Aren’t you glad I've given you all your firsts so far?”

You lift from Jungkook’s bed to face him. He licks his lips, doe-like eyes widening. His heart was pumping in his chest. “I am glad,” he murmured. 

“Say thank you.” your eyes harden a bit, however your own heart jolts, as well. “I gave you your first kiss, right? Your first handjob, too. You should be more grateful that someone like me pities you enough.”

Again, Jungkook’s body warmed. You were always so quick to remind him everything you’ve done to him, even if it was just a secret you and he shared. How could you tell your friends that you enjoyed playing with Jungkook, someone they deemed beneath them? A loser? 

“T-Thank you.” Jungkook stammered.  

You broke out into a smile. It’s low and a bit sinister, but Jungkook still thinks you’re far too pretty and someone who couldn’t do any wrong. “Have you ever thought about…me fucking you, Kookie?”

It’s easy to notice the growing bulge in Jungkook’s pajama pants. It excites you to no end.

Jungkook’s heart thumped even louder because yes, he absolutely had thought about it. He didn’t know what sex felt like yet, but he imagined - with you - it would be something incredible. 

“Yes.” Jungkook murmured.

You laughed.

Your laugh is just as demeaning as your tone always was.

“You’re such a pervert.” you quip. “Say it.”

“I’m a pervert.” Jungkook mumbled. From across the hall, he hears his brother’s tv sounds.

You laughed again. You were too buzzed to handle Jungkook and his submission. 

“You’d do whatever I tell you to, huh?” you tease, a grin on your lips. “I should stop being so mean to you, right?”

Jungkook wasn’t sure where the sudden change in your demeanor went. It happened fast, your teasing and soft eyes, to something more serious. He didn’t have the chance to question you on it before you return back to what you once were. “Take your pants off.”

“W-Why?”

“Just do it.” you shrugged your shoulders.

Jungkook had a lot of memories of you and he drawn into his memories. This moment, watching the way you hike up your skirt to remove your own panties and toss them aside, was one of many. He recalls the way he does as he’s told easily, his cock hardened at just the mere sight of you.

Jungkook remembers the way his bed creaks when you push him onto it and get on top of him, your thighs caging him between you. You sit directly on him, your clit grinding against his shaft. This was the closest he’s ever been to having sex, and he wasn’t even inside of you - that didn’t make it any less exciting for him.

“You don’t have to do this.” was what you hadn’t expected to hear from him - or any teenage boy. “You’re drunk, right?”

You recall the way your nails dig into his shoulders and how wide your eyes got. Your heart had jolted once more, but you were always left confused whenever Jungkook showed signs of genuine concern for you. 

“I’m not drunk.” you murmured to him. It wasn’t a complete lie, you were buzzed, yes, but not completely incoherent. “Maybe I feel sorry for you being all alone.”

It was you who felt lonely after far too many drinks, your mind clouded with the very boy beneath you.

 You press yourself firmly against him. “I left my friends to come here.”

You lied and told them you had to go home.

“Aren’t you happy?”

You didn’t know how you'd act if Jungkook had rejected you fully at that moment. 

Jungkook doesn’t. He tells you that he is happy - and it was genuine. He’s happy that you chose him out of anyone to do this with, even if his cock wasn’t inside you. Feeling your pussy, warm, wet and dripping all over him, was enough.

You weren’t quiet in the slightest, however, no matter how hard Jungkook pleaded with you with fluttering eyes. You were in bliss yourself, your hips rutting, slippery pussy gliding against his hard cock. Your hands tug at his own to touch you anywhere, stating that he should be grateful you were here with him right now.

“I think I’m going to cum-”

Jungkook didn’t mean to slam his hand against your lips, he just didn’t need anyone waking up and hearing you right now. 

What Jungkook didn’t expect was your tongue to wrap around his fingers and suckle onto them, blurry eyes staring right at him. He cums, it’s hard and fast and sticks all over you, but you don’t care because you cum right along with him.

You share many memories with Jungkook, even if your situation with him only lasts a school year. That was the first time he had told you about his college entrance exams, stating that the very next morning he had to take them. You recalled the way he calls you a good luck charm when he places an arm around your waist and holds you close to him, the intimacy frightening you to no end.

Jungkook recalls the way you were gone by the time he woke up the following morning as if a fragment of his own imagination.

Now, Jungkook watches the way his son - it was weird to even think about - eyes stare at the large estate as he drives through the gates. 

Ji-tae doesn’t say anything. He hadn’t said much the entire ride there. Your car is already waiting for them as they arrive and once Jungkook pulls in, you’re already getting out of the car.

“You live here?” Ji-tae murmurs as Jungkook puts the car in park. A part of him isn’t ready to face you.

“Yes.” Jungkook responds. “Are you hungry? Dinner should be served soon.”

Ji-tae furrows his brows. “You have a cook?”

“Only sometimes.” Jungkook admits. “There was no time for me to cook today.” he trails off, because it was obvious. He had to find someone else to pick up Jinah entirely instead of you like she’s used to.

You have to admit seeing Jungkook and Ji-tae together does something to your heart. You didn’t want to face the reality of it all, however, especially when Jungkook draws nearer. “He’s hungry.”

“He always is.” you glance at Ji-tae, who adverts his eyes as soon as you look at him. “I was just about to start cooking until I realized you were gone.”

“We need to talk.”

“I should take Ji-tae-”

“It wasn’t a suggestion.” Jungkook interrupts. 

You take a deep breath. “I’m taking my son-”

“Your son?!” Jungkook scoffs at your choice of words.

You swallow. “Get in the car, Tae.” your words grit out. “Jungkook, I’ll-”

“He’s hungry.” Jungkook hisses, his eyes glaring towards you. 

Ji-tae has never been in a parental dispute before. In just a short amount of time, he realized he had a father.

 No, his father wasn’t dead. 

Yes, his mother knew exactly who he was.

And he was right in the middle of it all.

“Let him eat.” Jungkook continues. “You and I need to talk.”

There wasn’t any getting out of this, you note. Jungkook’s eyes are hard and staring right through you. 

“Fine.” you quip. 

Sitting across from a child that looked just like him wasn’t on Ji-tae’s itinerary.

Jeon Jinah stares at Ji-tae just as he stares right back at her. His stomach rumbles when he smells the food that the older man - a chef - places right in front of them. 

Jinah watches curiously as the older boy eats as if he hadn’t in days. It reminds her of when her dad eats, shoving food down faster than he could chew. It makes her laugh but just a bit and she follows his lead, shoving food into her own mouth just as aggressively.

“That’s it?” Jungkook scoffs. “That’s all you have to say to me? It is what it is?”

Jungkook’s office is the furthest from the dining area that would grant them such privacy.

“You kept my son-”

“You have no proof that he’s yours.” you deadpan, only because you had no actual argument.

“Can you be serious for once, Y/N?” Jungkook rolls his eyes. “You’re actually so fucking selfish.”

You bite the inside of your cheek, your eyes glaring daggers at him. “I’m selfish?” you spit.

“Yeeesss!” Jungkook hisses. “What the fuck have I done to you?”

You snicker. “I don’t have time for this.” you wave Jungkook off. You were only willing to talk because it was evident Jungkook wasn’t going to let you leave - and you didn’t want to cause a scene with Ji-tae watching and Jinah close.

Your hands grasp the doorknob to get out of this entirely, but from behind you Jungkook slams it shut. “You’re good for that, aren’t you?” he hisses.

“Fuck off, Kook.” you push yourself away from him. 

“No.” Jungkook steps closer to you. “That’s all you do, Y/N. You keep running. How long are you going to run until you’re out of breath?”

“When are you going to get out of the past?” you question. “You’ve forced me-”

Jungkook laughs in disbelief. “I didn’t force you to do anything.”

“No?” It was your turn to laugh. “Was it not you claiming that you wouldn’t let me leave?”

“You’re changing the subject. That isn’t the point and you know it.” Jungkook barks. “Why are you choosing to ignore the elephant in the room? The elephant being a 13 year old child. My child.”

You cross your arms over your chest. You didn’t have an answer. At least not the right one Jungkook would be looking for. Your body is hot and you were in fight or flight mode - and he knows exactly which mode you’ll rather be taking now. 

“It is,” your eyes look at Jungkook’s once more. “what it is.” 

Jungkook takes a deep breath. His throat makes a noise - a snicker of disbelief. He blinks a few times. He recalls the one and only time he’s ever put a hand on a woman and it was Jinah’s mother - for good reason, he always tells himself. But now, he finds that he wants to do the same to you. He doesn’t, but the thought flickers in his mind. 

“Did you hate me that much?” 

Your hard demeanor crumbles at Jungkook’s words. Even more at the crack in his voice at the end of his question. You don’t look at him anymore, and instantly Jungkook notices. 

“You did.” Jungkook licks his lips. “Whatever animosity you felt towards me, Y/N, you didn’t have to take it out on him.” 

“I didn’t take anything out on Ji-tae!” you hiss, uncrossing your arms. 

“You did!” Jungkook barks back. “You denied him a father, have you not?” 

The way you flinch has Jungkook taking a step back. He swallows the lump in his throat. He has to calm himself down, he thinks. 

“For once, can you just think about how I feel?” Jungkook questions. “To have him look at me the way he did. With such animosity. He thought you were lying to him.” 

You turn away from Jungkook. The study is large with books lining the wall. A studded leather seat sits behind a desk that looks obsessively organized. You don’t care about the study or the desk, you just don’t want Jungkook to look at you right now. Your eyes were beginning to burn and it was you that now appeared utterly pathetic. 

“About…what?” you murmur. 

“About not knowing he existed.” Jungkook grits his teeth. “He thought I abandoned him, Y/N. That now I pity you and-“

“I told him the truth!” you exclaim, still your back turned away from him. “I…I don’t want him to hate you.”

“Too late for that.” Jungkook scoffs. “I don’t blame him. I wouldn’t believe it, either. It still hurts.”

You squeeze your eyes close. You didn’t want to be here anymore and have to face the consequences of your actions. Jungkook was right to feel how he does. You should have told him about your pregnancy. You should have explained it all to him - your feelings, no matter how confused you were about them, your reasoning for leaving him alone entirely. All of it.

And not even just Jungkook, but Ji-tae. You had taken a father away from him. Even if you told yourself you were doing the right thing, it didn’t mean that it was the right thing. There’s a part of Ji-tae that he’s missed out on for so long that he’s told you himself he doesn’t want if it meant hurting you. 

“I didn’t hate you.” you murmur, so low and defeated. 

“You sure?” Jungkook snickers. You haven’t turned around yet. “Could have fooled me. You know…I told you about Jinah,” he begins. “about how she needed a woman in her life. Why didn’t you tell me then? You didn’t think Ji-tae needed a father in his life?”

“Of course I did.” 

Your throat begins to ache and before you know it, you feel your cheeks wet. You were crying, something you didn’t want - not in front of Jungkook. 

“Maybe I wasn’t the father you thought he needed.” 

Jungkook speaks so certainly. He’s doing what he always does when it comes to you. He gets further into his head, his own insecurities speaking louder than you are. 

“What?” You wipe your own eyes and sniffle a bit. “What the fuck are you on about now, Kook?”

“Well what else could it be?” Jungkook exclaims. “You made your choice 13 years ago. You ghosted me and took Ji-tae with you.”

“That’s not true.” you turn around, eyes glossy and red. 

“Then tell me what the fuck is the truth?!”  Jungkook is taken aback by your appearance. Glossy eyes, trembling lips. He realized he’s never seen you cry before - or look this vulnerable. “I followed you around because I was pathetic, right? I did your homework and all assignments.”

“Stop.” you hiss, but he doesn’t.

“I did whatever you told me to do. I touched myself in front of you because you told me to. I smelt your panties because you told me to.” 

Jungkook is now a few inches away from you. He’s angered, similar to the way he was in his office hours ago. 

“I told you I loved you.” Jungkook murmurs. “And still I wasn't good enough for you.”

You push past Jungkook, feeling the familiar ache in your throat. You’re at his office door again - you couldn’t deal with this. Not now.

“There you go again.” Jungkook is behind you just as you peel the door open. “Running away from your problems.”

You don’t make it far out the door before Jungkook is grasping your bicep and yanking you back. 

“Be honest for once, Y/N. Say it.” Jungkook forces you to face him. “Tell me how pathetic I am, again. Isn’t that why you left me? You’ll rather have Ji-tae grow up without a father than for me to be that.”

You push at Jungkook’s chest as hard as you could. His grip on your bicep disappears, but you can still feel his fingers on you. 

“Don’t you think I did it because of you?!” you hiss, pushing him again. 

“Because of me?!” Jungkook’s eyes widened at your audacity. 

“Yes, you!” you bellow. You don’t mean to. The door is wide open now and you’re positive Ji-tae and Jinah could hear. “I didn’t have what you did. I wasn’t accepted anywhere like you!” 

You push him again, but this time Jungkook doesn’t attempt to dodge your attack. 

“I didn’t have parents that cared about me like you did. Do you really think you’ll be where you are now if I would have told you?” 

Jungkook watches the way you cry once more. That was twice in just a short amount of time. You’ve stopped pushing him and instead sob just a bit. 

Now, Jungkook feels terrible. His words replay in his mind and he comes to the actuality of your words. You did it for him. 

“Y/N…”

Your sobbing stops. You peer, through blurred eyes, the look that Jungkook gives you. Instantly, it angers you. You hated being pitied.

“Shut up and don’t look at me!” you hiss.

“Don’t do that.” Jungkook shakes his head with a sigh. “Don’t shut me out again.”

Jungkook wants to reach out and touch you, but he’s afraid that you’d attack him for real this time. 

“Do you really think,” you wipe at your eyes bitterly. “that your parents would’ve allowed you to give everything you worked for…for me?” you scoff. “A slut who got herself pregnant-“

“I got you pregnant.” Jungkook interrupts. “Stop blaming yourself, Y/N. You didn’t do anything by yourself. I loved you more than going to fucking college.”

You scoff and shake your head. “You don’t get it, Kook. Do you really think I wanted you to do that?”

Before Jungkook has the chance to get further into his own head and jump through conclusions, you continue. 

“Do you really think I wanted you to give up everything you worked hard for? For me? 

Watching Jungkok with his family, from afar, was enough for you to come to the conclusion that you’d keep this pregnancy to yourself; at least for now. Even now, you recall the way your stomach sunk at the look on Jungkook’s face. He’s holding up his diploma as he takes pictures alongside his parents. There’s several medals around his neck and even an award in his hand.

Jungkook wasn’t like you - you thought it right there. Jungkook had two parents that loved him. He had parents that were proud of him. His own mother had tears in her own eyes as she stared at her son so lovingly.

Proudly.

“Cheer up!” Ava exclaimed, wrapping her arm around your shoulders. She shakes you a bit. She doesn’t know about your pregnancy, nor does she know just who you’re staring at. “We actually passed!”

“Thanks to Jungkook.” Lia giggled on the other side of you. “College is going to be hard without him. We sure as hell ain't going where he is.” 

You felt your stomach churn at the mention of Jungkook. To your friends, he was nothing but a nerd you used to get what you wanted out of him, and in a way he was. However, you hadn’t told them how your heart felt whenever you were around him. You hadn’t told them how funny Jungkook actually was, and smarter than he even shows. 

Your friends didn’t know about you sneaking away from them to visit Jungkook in his bedroom. How your heart felt as he held you all night - how you wished you’d stay but forced yourself to leave even before the sun came up. 

Your friends didn’t know that you preferred the company of Jungkook over theirs. 

“Yeah.” you murmur. “We aren’t.”

Now, Jungkook stares at you. You’re breathing so heavily and for the first time, you actually feel like just a bit of weight is coming off of your shoulders.

“Look at everything you’ve accomplished.” you wave your hand around at the estate - at everything, truly. “The business. The success. Do you really think you’d have it if you hadn’t left?”

The question has Jungkook stunned. He’s silent, pondering on it. Would he, he thinks, have it all? You were the main cause of his success. You leaving him gave him the drive he needed to be where he was today. It was an action he took to prove to you that he was worthy, even if he never saw you again. 

Jungkook bites the inside of his cheek, his heart jumping in his chest. 

“No, right?” you run a hand over your hair, chuckling a bit. Bitterly. “You wouldn’t.”

“I wouldn’t have cared, either.” Jungkook responds. “I would have been fine going to community college. Or nowhere at all if it meant I could have stayed with you.”

You feel that ping in your chest again. It’s the same feeling you felt all those years ago while in Jungkook’s room. The way he looked in your eyes and told you that you didn’t have to do this. It’s a feeling you’ve never felt until that moment, you recall. The softness in his voice and the genuine look in his eye. 

“Jinah wouldn’t be here.” you mumble. Jungkook wasn't getting it, you think, or at least not in the way you need him to. 

Jungkook is silent once more. 

Jinah.

Taking a deep breath, Jungkook feels that wave of exhaustion flows through him once more. 

“Stay here tonight.” Jungkook pleads. “And don’t leave this time.”

You knit your brows. “What do you mean?”

“You always leave. Everytime.” Jungkook murmurs. “Like you did the first time. In my bedroom. You leave before we have the chance to actually talk.”

You bite your lip. Now wasn’t the time for you to bottle your emotions and mask them underneath slick remarks. 

“I want us to talk when we’re both level headed. Right now…let’s just eat. As a family.”

Jungkook steps out into the hallway and presses a hand onto your shoulder. He peers down at you, tilting his head just a bit. His eyes are curious. He wants to know what you’re thinking. He wants to ask everything - how was your pregnancy? How did you find out it was a boy? Did you have him naturally? Jungkook couldn’t imagine how you felt in labor, alone without him there to comfort you.

Jungkook’s lips are warm against your head. Your shoulders slump a bit, a sudden calmness overcoming you.

Ji-tae watches from the corner. Jinah is behind him. She’s confused, maybe even a bit upset at how irate her father appeared. She looks up at him with similarly dark eyes, her clothes ruined by attempting to keep up with him in eating.

“Are they fighting?” Jinah whispers. 

“We gotta go sit down.” was Ji-tae’s response just as Jungkook lifts his lips from your forehead. “I bet you can’t beat me to the table.”

Jinah instantly forgets the yelling just down the hall and runs as fast as her legs could bring her. Ji-tae glances back at you - the sight of you and Jungkook. His mind races with questions that he himself wishes he had the answers to. Instead, he turns on his feels and strolls after Jinah, assuring she got to the table right before he had. 

Jinah talks - and talks, and talks. It makes the dinner table feel a bit less awkward. Her main fascination now was Ji-tae - the new boy who was older, but not yet a man like her father. She asked question after question and it’s Jungkook who’s impressed by how patient he was. He answers all of her questions while Jinah sits with dirtied designer clothes and stained cheeks.

You’re a bit amused - and maybe even a little content - with watching Jinah and Ji-tae, even if she doesn’t fully comprehend who he is just yet. She invites him to her ballet recital, stating that he could sit front row alongside you and her dad. At first she was disappointed with hearing “I’ll try”, but it subsides when Ji-tae tells her it would depend if he was done with his gymnastic meets. As if on queue, her - and Jungkook’s - ears perk. The younger girl goes on and on without taking as much as a breath in how she too takes gymnastics - how she flips and always lands on her feet; unlike the other girls her age.

“Can I go?!” Jinah then turns to Jungkook - because she always did. There wasn’t anything she couldn’t get out of him, her matching eyes staring longingly at him until he eventually gave in.

“I don’t think-” was all Jungkook could get out before her eyes began to water rather dramatically. Jinah knew that her father was leading up to a no, and a young girl with a closet just for her dolls, designer clothing and a tea set imported from Europe wasn’t accustomed to anything that wasn’t yes.

“You can come.” Ji-tae speaks up. “On one condition.”

Jungkook lets out a sigh of relief when Jinahs eyes - that coincidently appears dry now - turns to Ji-tae.

“Con..di..shon.” Jinah squints her eyes. She doesn’t know what that means.

“Condition. Like…a promise.” Ji-tae takes another bite of the steak. It happened to be his second plate right when you and Jungkook arrived. “When I come in first place, you cheer louder than everyone there.”

It’s you that rolls your eyes - Ji-tae was always competitive, a trait he didn’t get from you as you couldn’t care less about coming on top. “It’s a local competition, so she won’t be kicked out.”

You learned the hard way when Ji-tae was 10. To think of the amount of money you spent leading up to the competition, you’d be able to cheer.

Jungkook watches the way Jinah lifts her pinky as if she was signing a contract. He glances your way to find you’re already looking at him and he thinks maybe things are going to be alright  - at least in this moment.

Currently, Ji-tae lays in the large bed in Jungkook’s home. He’s wearing headphones, his eyes staring right on the ceiling. His mind is clouded a bit, drifting to everything that he’s learned all in one day. He thinks of your and Jungkook’s conversation that you hadn’t known he was listening to, how you stated you didn’t have the things Jungkook had. He thinks of the pictures that were lining the living room walls of Jinah in different stages - gymnastics, ballet, her first days of pre-school and kindergarten.

Ji-tae even notices other pictures of families, but his eyes don't linger on them for longer than he needed to.

Ji-tae stirs when the dim room begins to brighten. He removes the headphones from around him and lifts up from his laying position to look towards the door. 

Jinah’s so small as she peers in. She opens it more once she realizes that Ji-tae is already up.

She’s holding something in her hands when she comes deeper in. Ji-tae sets the headphones beside him and goes towards the lamp on the end table and turns it on.

“Ice cream.” Jinah murmurs quietly as this was one of her biggest secrets once her father went to bed. She’s none the wiser about the cameras in the home, nor does Jungkook ever scold her about her late night ice cream adventures.

Ji-tae is amused when Jinah holds out the ice-cream for him. It’s wrapped in white wrapping and instantly, he knows it’s a drumstick. He takes it from her small hands. “Thanks.” he whispers to her. 

Jinah settles onto the bed, her legs crossed as she messily opens the ice cream, a few of the roasted peanuts falling onto her pajamas and onto the bed.

You sit on Jungkook’s bed, your eyes lingering on his back. It flexes each time he moves his arms as he dries his hair. You had showered after dinner when he was getting Jinah ready for bed, and as he did, you had spoken to Ji-tae about spending the night, assuring that in the morning you’d get him a change of clothes and her gym bag. 

“I think he hates me.”

Jungkook turns around to face you. You’re already watching him. He thinks you look cute when you wear his clothing, now only being in an oversize shirt as you didn’t have any of your own clothes here.

“Ji-tae doesn’t hate you.” you say to him. “Why do you feel that way?”

Jungkook strolls towards the right of the room and back towards the bathroom. He hands his towel to dry before returning. “I don’t know, really.” he admits. “I might just be projecting. I mean…I’d hate me if I was him.”

“Come here.” you gesture for Jungkook to take a seat besides you. He’s only wearing underwear, prepared for bed. You want to do just that, but you also know Jungkook wouldn’t be able to sleep if his mind was so hell-bent on telling him he was hated by a 13 year old.

Jungkook does. You face him as he sits down, your eyes take in his face, to his bare chest.

You take a deep breath. For a moment, you are both silent. Jungkook knits his brows a bit - it looks like you want to say something, but it appears to be troubling you. There’s a slight grimace on your face.

“I’m sorry.” you mumble.

Jungkook blinks.

Then, Jungkook blinks again. He blinks a total of five times.

 His eyebrows soften. “That took a lot out of you, huh?” he snickers, his lips twitching.

The snarky side of you would’ve snapped at him by now, something that wouldn’t have offended him entirely because he loves it, but you note that it wasn’t the time for that. Jungkook, after having some time to think over your words, had calmed down from earlier.

“I’m sorry, too.”

“For what?” you ask. “You didn’t do anything.”

Unless you count the way he spoke to you after not seeing you for 13 years. Or how unprofessional the relationship you and he had as boss and “assistant”. The list could go on - how he talked about you to his closest friends that he met in college, said friends that now despise you without even truly knowing you. How he had resentment towards you that caused him to take it out on every woman afterwards.

It isn’t Jungkook’s proudest moments.

“You had to go through it all alone, right?” Jungkook questions. “I can be upset with you for how things happened, but I can also try to put myself in your shoes.”

You hated being sentimental. It was a weird feeling - different than the sexual tension that Jungkook fucked out of you. That was easier than sitting here right now underneath his gaze. Your throat begins to ache and your heart does the annoying jolting again.

“I would’ve stayed.” Jungkook repeats his words from earlier.

“That would’ve been dumb.” you snort, glancing away from him to further avoid his gaze. “You would’ve stayed with the bitch that used you?”

Your foot begins to bounce slightly.

“You were too kind, Kook.” you say. “You let me use you and-”

“Was I not a willing participant?” Jungkook interrupts you. He leans closer to you, reaching out to gently poke your cheek. “You speak as if you took advantage of me, Y/N. I did your homework because I wanted to. I skipped classes because I wanted to.”

When you finally turn back towards Jungkook, you find that his own eyes are already waiting for you.

You exhale. “I thought you would’ve found a girlfriend in college.” you attempt to change the subject. “Someone nice.”

“I did.” Jungkook replies.

You furrow your brows. “Oh?” you ask. You’re unsure how to feel - even if you know you don’t deserve to feel anything at all. 

Jungkook tilts his head. “Didn’t work out.” he murmurs. 

You swallow. “Why not?”

Jungkook shrugs his shoulders. “She was too nice.” he responds. “Isn’t that fucked up? It didn’t work out because she was too nice?” he snorts. “I was an asshole in college. I’ve built up resentment towards you without even realizing that I was trying to find you in every woman I involved myself with. Too nice, not nice when it mattered, too submissive. I was just never satisfied.”

Again, you feel it. This time, it’s a feeling you’ve felt before when Jungkook, as teenagers, stated that he didn’t talk to other girls; something you hadn’t felt in a long time.

“What about you? Have you dated anyone?”

“Y-Yeah.” you nod. “Not long. Only one guy.”

“What happened?” Jungkook doesn’t want to think about someone else having you.

“Stole from me.” you reply quickly. “Called me a crazy bitch on his way out. Stealing from me meant he was also stealing from Ji-tae. After that, I realized I didn’t have time to date. I stopped.” You shrugged your shoulders just as he did. “It’s always just been Ji-tae and I.”

Jungkook doesn’t say anything. He tries to imagine what you’d look like pregnant, even as young as you were. What you’d look like holding a young boy's hands and navigating the world when you yourself were so young.

“This has to be a lot to take in at such a young age.”

You nod your head in agreement. You want to talk to Ji-tae again in the morning. He’s punctual and waking up in a new environment would surely throw off his routine, but Jungkook does have a home gym you were sure he didn’t mind him using. 

You hum to yourself, your mind drifting a bit before Jungkook speaks again.

“I want him to talk to a therapist.” 

You blink.

“I know someone. He’s a friend of mine,” Jungkook begins. “from college. He’s the best in the city, too. I think it’ll be good for all of us.”

You find yourself inhaling again. “I think so, too.” you agree. “Hopefully whatever we say is confidential.” you tease - only a bit, because you did want some form of privacy if you were going to be speaking to a therapist.

Jungkook snorts. “Joon’s professional.” he assures. “He takes his job and license seriously. Plus, he’s a genuine friend of mine. He’s one of the few that doesn’t hate you.”

Jungkook stiffens a bit when he realizes he’s said too much. He watches your expression change for a moment, before it flickers back to the more stoic one he remembers.

“I mean-”

“I know what you mean.” you interrupt. “So…how much of a bitch did you tell them I was to you?”

You’re staring so intently at him, but you appear so calm. Jungkook doesn’t know if you’re upset with him, or toying with him like you enjoy doing.

“Did you tell them how obsessed you were with me?” you murmur. It’s right then that Jungkook sees it, that twinkle in your eyes. “I bet they tried hooking you up with girls, right?”

You adjust yourself to turn fully towards Jungkook, his oversize shirt hiking up your thighs just a bit to offer him a peak of what's beneath it - which isn’t anything at all. His shoulders relax just a bit, his eyes blinking away from your smooth thighs back to your eyes.

Softly, Jungkook nods his head.

Your lips curl upwards just a bit and it excites him. He feels a shudder run up his spine, the hair on his arm rising as goosebumps break out.

“I can’t wait to meet them.”

You move fast - or maybe Jungkook just doesn’t care to react. You climb right into his lap, sitting directly against his clothed crotch and he immediately wants to remove his underwear to feel you fully. 

Your hands settle on his chest a bit, your eyes watching the way your fingers trace along the tattoo on his chest. You tilt your head just a bit just as Jungkook’s hands settle onto your waist.

“Did you tell them the wicked bitch from your past return? Or am I a secret?”

Jungkook doesn’t intend to hide the truth from you. “Secret.” he responds. He knows his friends. You haven’t been a topic to them for years now, but when you were they didn’t have anything nice to say. Namjoon, like he stated, was neutral. He attempted to see things from your point of view, even if he didn’t have it. He came up with his own conclusions to not fully demonize you, a teenage girl.

Jimin, however, couldn’t be convinced. Upon immediately meeting Jungkook, the shy freshman with soft eyes that kept to himself, he thought of you as a lion that preyed on a lamb. His attempts in meeting different girls in college had gone down the drain, but it didn’t mean he ever stopped. He was ecstatic in knowing that Jungkook had a child on the way and prayed that it would work out with Jinah’s mother.

It didn’t.

However, Jimin wasn’t one to quit.

Hoseok was uninterested in you, but brought you up the most as the years dragged on. He couldn’t understand how one girl could have his friend act in such a way.

“How would they react if you told them?”

Your fingers tap upwards to his collarbone, to his neck.

“I bet they were hoping you’d get over me, too.”

“They’ll get over it.” Jungkook grabs your hand into his own. He brings it to his lips to press soft kisses onto your fingertips. “They have to, right? You aren’t going anywhere.”

It’s a settled statement, not a question in sight. He’s telling you directly as calmly as he could. 

“What was your pregnancy like?”

You blink.

Jungkook watches the way your expression shifts, your eyebrows knitting together. “My…pregnancy?”

“Yeah.” Jungkook nods curtly. “Did it go easily?”

The shift in conversation takes you by surprise, but you try not to dwell on it. “Um,” your mind races in order to think back to your pregnancy years ago. “I remember being exhausted. All Tae did was kick nonstop.”

Jungkook wants to envision it; you pregnant, your stomach forming as the months go on. The more he thinks of it, the sadder he gets - as pathetic it sounds - to not experience it alongside you.

“I was always hungry. I thought I’d get these weird cravings, you know?” you tell him and Jungkook listens intently, intrigued by it all while you sit in his lap. “But I didn’t. I would eat while walking around the house because that seemed to calm him down a bit.”

“Did you want a boy?”

Jungkook’s question brings you back to that time all those years ago. It reminds you of how lonely you felt without your friends - without him. All of your doctor visits were held in the next town over to assure - as your mother requested - you wouldn’t be seen by anyone she knew. Almost rarely did she attend with you.

It was moments like that, you sitting alone in the small space, that you ask yourself what it would’ve been like if you had told Jungkook. Or anyone else. 

You stare with squinting eyes at the screen, your heart jolts against your chest at how weird it felt to see the fetus right inside of you. 

You pondered if she was judging you, someone so young and without anyone to accompany her. She was nice, you recall, always smiled at you and even asked if you wanted to know the gender at a different appointment.

You hadn’t thought about the gender much -  not until that day. At your uncertainty, she had given you an envelope and it takes you exactly 2 weeks to open it. 

You weren’t sure exactly what you were afraid of - you were doing this regardless. Did you want a girl? That would be easier seeing as you yourself were one. You knew what it was like to be a girl living in this world. You knew how the world operated - for the most part - and you could teach her things your mother hadn’t taught you. You could show her the affection you wished you had, even right at that moment.

You remember the way you cried upon opening the envelope and reading “It’s a boy!” written neatly on it. You weren’t sure why you were crying. You hadn’t cried in months, but yet there you sat in your own bedroom, bawling at the thought of raising a boy all on your own.

“Yeah. I did.” you answer Jungkook truthfully. “I cried,” you snorted to yourself. “but then…I was happy. It’s just been Ji-tae and I ever since. We grew up together.”

Jungkook smiles at that. His fingers tap along your waist as he thinks about you and Ji-tae - you holding his smaller hands in yours. You holding him to your chest, him learning how to walk and talk similar to how he and Jinah were.

“I know what I did wasn’t right.”

You lean closer to Jungkook until your forehead touches his and your nose glides against one another. Jungkook’s heart races at how close you and he are. It appeared that no matter how many times he’s had you, you always had the ability to make his heart race as if he was the same teenage boy from his youth.

“But…” you murmur. Your lips are nearly touching his. “...I don’t want you to hate me.”

In that moment, Jungkook feels you shift in his lap and press yourself against his (embarrassingly hard) cock. It’s easier to feel you as you weren’t wearing anything underneath his shirt.

“I don’t hate you.” Jungkook answers almost instantly, his lips parting a bit. “You know I don’t.”

“Hm,” your hands trail teasingly behind his neck, and when you do so Jungkook has no choice but to shudder. “I know.”

Your lips capture his and he takes it all in needily. Instantly, his hold onto your waist tightens as you  kiss him, growing more lewd by the second. 

Your fingers trail into his hair, lightly tugging at them as Jungkook’s hands slide upwards and underneath the shirt to touch your soft skin. His tongue suckles onto yours, moaning into your mouth helplessly.

“Where do we go from here?” you say against his lips. Your body feels so hot and Jungkook’s hands on you doesn’t help.

“Where do you want it to go?” murmurs Jungkook in response. 

There’s another light tug on Jungkook’s hair, one that feels good to the touch. Maybe because you were the one doing it.

“I thought I didn’t have a choice.”

Jungkook inhales your scent. It’s clean and simple, nothing too dramatic. He can feel his cock twitch to be free from its barrier and feel you. His hands slide up your sides until they’re right underneath your breast.

“I don’t want you to go.” Jungkook says, pecking your lips, then sending kisses down your jaw. “I want you both here with me and Jinah.” 

You hum, deciding to deepen the kiss once more. Jungkooks’s hands tighten their grip on you, sliding up until they’re gripping your breast entirely. Your nipples hard instantly and you couldn’t help but groan into his mouth.

“You aren’t making it easier for me.” Jungkook murmurs against your lips. “I think you know what you’re doing.”

You’re amused. “What am I doing exactly?” you ask, but you know the teasing tone in your voice followed by the way you slightly grind against him that it’s obvious. 

“That,” Jungkook sighs. “you’re torturing me, right now. You always liked doing that.”

You did. As much as you enjoyed doing it, Jungkook enjoyed being on the receiving end of it. His thumbs press against your hardened nipples, twirling them slowly, his dark eyes watching you. 

“You’re supposed to be madder at me right now.” you voice. Leaning away from Jungkook, he immediately misses your warmth, but his hands settle on your waist. “You’re too forgiven.”

Jungkook takes a deep breath. For a moment, he watches you. It’s hard being upset with you when you’re already in his lap and he can feel just how wet you are, even through his underwear. It makes it harder when he does hear things from your point of view, something Namjoon had insisted he do plenty of times before, even when he didn’t have it. While he went years building resentment for you while simultaneously trying to find you in every woman he sought out, you were raising a child on your own.

Jungkook isn’t sure what he thought your life would be, truly. He assumed you’ve gone to college elsewhere and found someone else as weak as him. He assumed you used your abilities to get yourself somewhere far, far away from it all.

“You’re thinking too hard again.” 

Your voice brings him back to reality. He blinks once, then twice.

“I am mad.” Jungkook murmurs. 

“Oh?” you tilt your head, peering down at him.

Jungkook feels his heart jolt.

“I’m mad you didn’t tell me, but you already knew that.” Jungkook continues. “I’m mad you did it all alone.”

“And what else?”

Jungkook isn’t sure what you’re doing by asking him this. What more did you want to hear from him? As long as he’s known you, there has to be some way for you to further toy with him. He’s sure of it when you grasp the end of his shirt and pull it over your head, removing the last piece of clothing until you’re fully naked on top of him.

“I’m mad you m-made me waste unnecessary time.”

“Did I?” you snicker, more amused by the slight stutter in his words. Your fingers tap along Jungkook’s chest, dipping lower and lower. “Maybe you should blame yourself, too. I couldn’t have been hard to find, right?”

You don’t blame Jungkook in the slightest and you were truly just talking for the sake of it. 

When you read his abdomen, Jungkook can feel his cock flinch desperately. 

“I wanted to.” Jungkook admits, a tint on his cheeks. “Jimin told me not to.”

“Jimin…” you say his name far too sweet for Jungkook’s liking. “...a friend of yours?”

Jungkook nods. 

“What does he think about me?”

Your fingers are now at the band of his underwear, the calvin klein lettering looking back up at you. 

“Jimin…holds grudges…” Jungkook licks his lips. “But he doesn’t know you, just-”

“Knows what you told him?” you finish the sentence. “I’m fine with that.”

Your fingers dig into his underwear and right as you lift yourself off of him, you peel them down. Embarrassingly, Jungkook’s cock shoots up, tip red and angry. 

Swallow, Jungkook murmurs, “I thought about you a lot. But…”

You allow Jungkook to speak. His underwear stops at his knees and he wiggles them off until he’s fully free of them.

“...I still resented you. Hoseok didn’t make it any better.”

You allow Jungkook to speak, grasping his cock in your palm and centering it at your entrance. You watch his face entirely.

“He told me to take my frustration from you out on other girls.”

Jungkook’s lips part, letting out a sharp breath when he feels the tip slide between your lips. So wet and warm, fully engulfing him entirely. 

“Go on.” you encourage, your tone strangely sweet that Jungkook does. “I tried. I told you the relationship didn't work out.” Jungkook murmurs. “Every hookup, all I could think about was you.”

There it was, Jungkook thinks, the twinkle in your eyes as he speaks. He thinks his words are fueling your own ego. Your walls squeeze around the tip immediately as you enter it and Jungkook shudders.

“Tell me more.”

And Jungkook does. He says it all - how he resented you for making him feel that way. How even after years away from you, all he could think about was the way you made him feel. He tells you how he became unrecognizable to himself, someone he didn’t recognize when he looked in the mirror - and he blamed it all on you. Blaming it on someone made it easier for him to get through life, even if he knew that it made him as pathetic as you called him.

Your thighs cage Jungkook in as he speaks, your hips rising and falling. You go faster and faster with each admission, your eyes focusing on the way Jungkook’s flutter and his lips part to let out satisfied moans.

“What do you feel now, Kookie?” you couldn’t help but ask. Your hands settle onto his shoulders, nails digging into his skin without a care. Jungkook finds the stinging pain pleasurable. 

It’s hard to speak with the way you were taking him, rising and falling onto his cock so well. Your breasts bounce in his face and it’s right here that Jungkook thinks he’s in heaven.

“I love fucking you.” Jungkook gasps, his hands grabbing your waist in an attempt to slow you down, but if anything it feeds you. You grind against his cock, groaning with how deep inside of you it is. “I love having you close to me again.”

“You sound-”

“Pathetic?” Jungkook answers for you with a whimper. “I know.”

Nothing about what Jungkook was going through - and what he’s openly admitting - was admirable. He was everything you told him he was. And, at the moment, he hadn’t cared. Instead, his focus was on the way your pussy squeezes around his cock so lovingly, sinking him into the pleasured abyss, his tip slamming against that sweet spot he’s grown to love. 

“I love being around you.” Jungkook has to stop you himself by lifting you off of him. His breath quickens and for a moment, he squeezes his eyes shut. He didn’t want to cum - not yet.

“Too much?” you murmur, hovering above him. “Everytime you get sentimental, you act like you can’t handle it.”

“I can handle it just fine.” Jungkook retorts. “Maybe I just want to savor it.” he says.

Much to your dismay - partially - Jungkook flips the two of you. Your back hits the bed, but only a second goes by before he flips you once more, your chest pressed firmly against the bed.

“Knowing how you like to do things.” Jungkook retorts right behind you, and before you could snap back at him like he knows you would, his cock is entering you. 

As if on instinct, your thighs part, needing to feel more of him inside of you. Your lips part and as hard as you try, you couldn’t help the moan that falls pass them.

“Never know when you’ll get up and run away.” Jungkook snaps his hips forwards, a hand falling right besides your head, the other onto your waist to keep you right where he needs you. “You’re good for that, you know?”

Jungkook starts at a steady pace, his eyes fluttering with how well you feel around his cock. He doesn’t get tired of this - of you. 

“Fuck you.” you hiss just as your hands grip the sheets beneath you tightly. 

Then, Jungkook’s pace quickens. Who was he not to give you what you were desperately asking of him? His cocks pumps into you deeply, his stamina never wavering. The sight of you alone has his heart racing. You look so beautiful beneath him, your back arched just a bit, your thighs pushed apart to allow more of him in. It was perfect.

“But those days are behind us, right? You won’t be running anymore.” Jungkook huffs, lowering himself to press a kiss against your back.

You bite the inside of your cheek harshly, your eyes fluttering. Jungkook always has this switch to him. One moment, you’d be in control of it all, then the next he was. It was a healthy contrast to his younger self who allowed you to do whatever. It reminds you now that he was indeed a man.

As much as Jungkook was torturing himself with pulling out right as he was about to cum, he’s torturing you just as much. You’re a trembling mess beneath him, only the tip still in your clenching hole. He’s only a bit smug with how fucked out you are right now, loving the way your body flinches and your pussy squeezes at him, wanting more.

“You look so pretty like this.” Jungkooks coos, allowing his cock to push deeper inside of you and on instinct, your hips buck. A straggled moan passes through your lips. “It’s so different to see you compliant.”

Your pussy is already so wet and with each stretch, a sloppy squelch dances through Jungkook’s ears. It’s something he’d never get tired of. He pushes the rest of his cock in, burying it to the hilt. Your back arches and your fingers are tightly fisted into the bedsheets. A part of you is grateful that Jungkook’s home is as cheap as your apartment. The walls aren’t as thin and behind the thick, mahogany door you couldn’t hear anything. 

Witnessing the way your pussy takes all of him, Jungkook couldn’t help but licks his lips. Your body is so flushed, your thighs shaking and he cannot see your face, but he knows by now what you look like - glossy eyes and fucked out expression; his favorite.

“You tapping out?” Jungkook chuckles, thrusting out just to push back into you once more. He enjoys the sight of your ass slamming against him. “Can’t handle it?”

Jungkook isn’t slow in fucking you this time. He’s tortured you - and himself -  enough. He doesn’t give you a chance to give him a snappy response, and instead beats you to it. Each thrust has your body crashing against the bed, a moan - sometimes a high-pitched squeal - following immediately after. He thinks how perfect you are beneath him - how much he doesn’t want this to end. Your pussy is so wet that it captivates him entirely, plunging in and out of you roughly as you beg him for more - deeper, harder, faster.

You don’t have anything catty to say to the man, nothing besides sobs of pleasures. Maybe Jungkook won this one, you think, but there'll be many more battles that you’ll overcome. Until then, you allow your hips to meet Jungkook’s thrusts. Your pussy spasms, arousal pooling down your thighs filthily.

“Theeere you go,” Jungkook groans. His left hand slides from your waist slowly, leaving goosebumps behind them. He stops at your neck and roughly grasps it and hoists you up against his chest. His pumps don't stop as his lips press against your ear. He nibbles on it teasingly before his tongue licks along it. “I know you can take it just fine, baby.”

From your neck, Jungkook’s hand softens as it glides down to your chest. He squeezes a breast into his palm possessively, all the way his tongue falls to your neck. 

“Feel how wet you are.”

You do without hesitation - another part to Jungkook for how submissive you were being. You’re embarrassed by how right he is, your thighs coated with your own arousal. His cock pumps more out with each thrust. Your fingers twirl around your clit as your orgasm approaches closer. Your body falls limp against Jungkook’s.

Squeezing your breast again, Jungkook grumbles, “You aren’t going anywhere.” 

Jungkook knows that no matter how demanding and monotonous he speaks, deep down, there’s the same pathetic teenage boy you remember. The same one who watched you from afar and wished, that even if once, you’d talk to him again. He needs to hear you say it, so he tells you to. “Say it.”

You let go, juices pulling onto your fingers as Jungkook sloppily thrusts forward - deeper and deeper, hitting that sweet spot so well.

“Say you’re not going to leave.” Jungkook nearly begs into your neck, his stomach forming into knots.

You do, the simple “I’m not going to leave you” that has his pathetic heart fluttering. At that moment is when Jungkook cums, spilling so much inside of you that it knocks him unconscious immediately afterwards.

Jungkook is groggy when he awakes. He isn’t sure what time it is or how long he’s been asleep for - and for a few seconds, he forgets what day it is. Then, nearly all at once, does he remember exactly what’s happened the day prior.

Jungkook also remembers you fucking him to sleep, so much so that he couldn’t do his nightly workout session.

Reaching out his arms, Jungkook feels his heart jolt at how empty the bed feels. His eyes attempt to adjust and when they do, he finds that he’s alone, the large bed holding no trace of you. At first, he doesn’t know what to think or how to react - then his mind jumps into multiple scenarios. 

You left him - again. You fucked him to sleep and took the first moment you could to get the fuck out of there, taking Ji-tae with you. Of course, there’s only so far you could go, but it’s the first thought that comes to mind.

Then, however, Jungkook notices the faint smell of cinnamon. It eases his heart just a bit that he notices that his bedroom door is cracked just a bit. 

Within 15 minutes, Jungkook is washed up and takes the long hallway down to the kitchen.   He hears running water and when he rounds the corner, he sees you.

“Well you’re finally awake.” you say, glancing up from the plates you were scrubbing. 

Jungkook takes a deep breath, watching you long enough that you look up at him and catch his eye.

“Rough night?” you’re teasing him. The smile that forms onto your lips is enough for him to know that.

Jungkook hums, deciding to enter the kitchen instead of lingering in the entry way. His eyes scan the scenery and inhale the cinnamon smell once more.

Jungkook swallows, feeling a fluttery sensation in his stomach. 

You hadn’t left him, he thinks. Instead, you’re still here. You’re cleaning up what was cooked for breakfast, a meal he’s obviously missed, and you’re dressed for the day. 

You hadn’t left him. You cooked. You’re still here. You’re teasing him.

“You made breakfast.” states Jungkook, deciding that if he didn’t come back to reality soon, he’d probably confuse you.

“Your plate’s in the microwave. Didn’t want to wake you.”

You woke before anyone, but you weren’t surprised when Ji-tae was the next person up. You had managed to drive home, grab more than a few items that he’d need to start his own day, before returning. 

Jinah was the next one up. Her hair was a mess and at the sound of pancakes, she’s wide awake. 

“Jinah’s with Ji-tae.” you say as you place a plate onto the drying rack. “I told him he could use your treadmill. He usually runs every morning.”

Jungkook’s eyes glanced around the kitchen once more. He supposed that explains items being out that he’s positive you wouldn’t use - like the chocolate flavor protein powder.

“Is that fine?”

Jungkook blinks back at you. Your eyes are on him, this time scrubbing a pan.

“Of course.” Jungkook responds coolly. “I hope Jinah isn’t annoying him,” he says. He goes towards the microwave and opens it to find the stack of pancakes - blueberry; Jinah’s favorite. “She grows attached quickly.”

You should know, Jungkook thinks, as she grew fond of you quicker than he expected. 

You snicker. You have to admit that Ji-tae fits the role of the older brother perfectly and watching the two of them does something to your heart. It was him who cut her pancakes when she asked and at the sight of Ji-tae adding extra syrup to his pancakes, she insisted that she wanted the same.

“Tae’s fine.” you tell Jungkook. You’re rinsing the last pan. “She hasn’t left his side yet. They actually look so cute~”

Jungkook scarfs down the pancakes when you remember. The two of you remained in a comfortable silence in the kitchen as he ate. You make your way towards the island where your bag sits. You rummage through it.

“I went home while you were asleep. Grab some things for Tae.” you start. “Thought…you’d wanted these.”

Jungkook licks his lips. His eyebrows furrow a bit when you hold up a black album. Immediately Jungkook notices it’s a photo album

Jungkook’s eyes meet yours for a moment. You look…nervous? 

Jungkook grabs the album from your hands. It’s black with a gold band outlining it.

“I know pictures can’t make up 13 years but…” you trail off. You can feel your heart in your chest now. Still, you’re unsure why you’re feeling this way. There weren’t anything but pictures throughout the years, and yet you feel as though you want the world to swallow you whole right now. 

Jungkook opens the album, his eyes falling on the first picture. It’s of you - the you he remembers 13 years ago. You’re so young, he thinks, laying in the hospital bed sporting the gown. In your chest is a small infant, curled up. Your hands cradle him close and at the sight, Jungkook swallows thickly. 

“My mom took that picture.” you murmur, glancing at the photo across from him. “He actually came a few weeks early. I was actually so relieved,” you snickered. “all he did was move and kick constantly.

Jungkook goes through the photo album, witnessing the way Ji-tae - and you - age. First birthdays, to first days of school. Award ceremonies at school, to his gymnastic meets - a sense of pride goes through Jungkook when he notices that Ji-tae was always first in everything.

The most recent picture in there is one of him this year, his final school picture before he’d be entering High School. He stares at the picture of the boy that’s so close to him now that shares the same dark eyes and smile.

You watch the way Jungkook’s eyes are nearly unblinking the entire time, flipping through the pictures. A few of them you explain - like Ji-tae participating in gymnastics, or the time he won so many awards at school that you treated him an entire day at the arcade, something you saved up for.

“Are you okay?” you couldn’t help but ask, causing Jungkook to blink a few times. He hadn’t talked much and now, all he had been doing was staring at the school picture in front of him.

“Is it…too much?”

You were afraid to hear what Jungkook had to say. A part of you feels bad for having him and Ji-tae find out the way they did. You understood the decision wasn’t only yours and in the end, it was Ji-tae that lost out on a paternal figure. The other part of you - the stubbornness that Jungkook knows all too well - doesn’t feel the same. Could you look at yourself the same if you knew Jungkook would have given up everything he worked hard for to stay with you?

You thought giving Jungkook an insight of what it was like, even if it was just a small fraction of it, would be a start. Now-

“You’re all he has.”

Jungkook’s words replay in your mind - over and over again.

“And he was all you had, too.” Jungkook murmurs. He closes the album and finally looks up at you. “I understand now why he thinks I’m taking advantage of you.”

“He doesn't think that anymore.” you protest, but Jungkook cuts you off.

“If looks could kill, Y/N, I would’ve been dead the first time he saw me.” Jungkook isn’t upset, you note. He’s understanding - now more than ever. “He’s just protective over you.”

You take a deep breath, nodding your head. “I know…” you exhale. “I don’t want him to be. I want him to be a regular teenager and not worry about anything. But that’s Tae for you.”

“Can I keep these?” Jungkook asks, gesturing to the pictures.

“Y-Yeah.” you nod. Your body warms up and you have to look away from Jungkook in order to feel cool again.

You hadn’t realized Jungkook had rounded the island until you felt him. A pair of arms wrap around your shoulders. 

“Kook-”

“Thank you.”

Ji-tae feels like, in a short amount of time, he’s grown well of hiding around corners to listen in on you and Jungkook. He watches the way Jungkook wraps you into an embrace that has you shocked. The way he whispers “Thank you” to you, followed by a “I want us to be a family”.

Ji-tae listens in for a bit longer. He studies the way you couldn’t hold Jungkook’s gaze before you’re looking away from him nervously, but you find his kisses inviting. You tell him that you aren’t sure if it’s something he - Ji-tae - would want so soon. You don’t want to change everything he’s known overnight. “Whenever he’s ready.” was Jungkook’s response. Ji-tae knows that he has to play it cool when Jinah’s feet paddle against the floor, coming closer and closer. When she reaches Ji-tae, her small hands grasp his and she says, “I found you!”

“You did.” Ji-tae hums, a low grin forming onto his lips. “I guess it’s my turn to count.”

“Lei,”

Lei looks up from her computer. She offers a kind smile. 

“Mr. Park.” Lei stands, offering a head bow. “Welcome.”

Park Jimin offers the same smile her way, one that always has her stomach falling at how handsome he is.

“Is Mr. Jeon expecting you?” Lei asks. 

“Not exactly.” Jimin giggles. 

Behind Jimin stands a woman, her arms behind her back as she waits patiently for Jimin. Her hair is a golden brown and through the floor length windows behind her, it appears to glow. She’s model-like, Lei notes. Tall, slender, toned. 

“Let me call him-”

Lei picks up the phone to dial her boss right on the top floor. Jungkook isn’t one to be stern, but he’s made it clear that he would need to be informed before anyone makes their way up.

“That won’t be necessary.” Jimin assures, placing a hand onto the desk. “I’ll give him a call on the way up, okay?”

Lei appears hesitant. She bites her lip, glancing between Jimin to the model-like woman behind him. She knows who he is. After being employed here for years, she’s well acquainted with those close to Mr. Jeon. 

Jungkook and you have been nothing but unprofessional in his office. But you and he are on lunch break so it’s completely fine. You’re seated on his lap now, your once buttoned shirt now wide open for him. Your skirt is scrunched up at your hips. Your panties are soaked as they grind against his hardened cock.

Completely unprofessional for a boss and his assistant.

But it’s okay, because you’re also the mother of his son.

Jungkook’s tongue slurps and suckles against your hardened nipple, his thumb and index finger tugging at the other one. His right arm is wrapped around your waist, his palm directly against your ass, encouraging you to grind harder against him.

“I can get more work done around here if you’d stop trying to fuck me so much.” 

But the way your hands grip at Jungkook's hair tells the true story. You didn’t want him to stop, and neither did he.

“Anyone would be happy to get paid to rub their pussy against me.” Jungkook retorts, popping your wet nipple from his lips. 

Jungkook is right about that, but he also doesn’t have the chance to continue further due to the elevator sounding. He feels his head begin to hurt. 

“How many times do I have to tell Lei?” he grumbles.

It takes you and Jungkook 2 minutes to get situated. It would’ve been faster if the man wasn’t hellbent on kissing you every few seconds, laughing against your lips while you attempted to button up your shirt.

Just as the elevator doors open, you’re already sitting at your desk. 

Jungkook’s knowing smirk drops when he realizes who is behind the elevator doors.

“Well well,” 

Your eyes follow the man that walks through, then at the woman behind him. Glancing at Jungkook, your eyebrows knit. He doesn’t look content in seeing either of them.

Jungkook stands from his seat. “What-”

“You’ve been ignoring all of my calls and texts.” the man tells Jungkook. “Hobi said he hasn’t heard from you, either.”

Jungkook takes a deep breath as he looks at a stern Park Jimin, one of his closest friends.

Seeing Jimin now wouldn’t be an issue, of course, if he hadn’t been avoiding him because of you and Ji-tae - mainly you. 

Slowly, you and Jungkook were growing accustomed to being a family. It took two weeks for you to allow Ji-tae to occupy the spare room and make it his own. The first session with Namjoon was just a week ago, and tomorrow will be the second one. 

Namjoon himself has been sworn into secrecy and had been speechless at the words Jungkook had told him over the phone. At times, he laughs at the look on Namjoon’s face when he comes to his home and actually see’s Ji-tae for the first time.

The events of last month had occupied Jungkook’s time to the point that he didn’t have time to answer Jimin’s blind date requests. He knew it was a matter of time before Jimin came to him himself.

“Mr. Jeon,” you say, standing at your desk and rounding it. Being professional with him is so out of the ordinary that it even surprises you. “should I get refreshments for you and your…guests?”

Jimin turns to you, allowing his eyes to trail the entirety of your body before meeting your eyes. “Hello.” he says, offering the same kind smile to you that he did to Lei. “I wasn’t aware you had an assistant now. My apologies.”

Jungkook watches the way Jimin holds out his hand for you to take. When you do, he presses a kiss to the back of your hand.

“Park Jimin,” the man says.

Jungkook watches the way your eyes flash with sudden realization. He licks his lips, his heart pounding in his chest.

“Park Jimin…” you hum back his name so sweetly that Jungkook knows it’s an act. Your eyes connect with his and you feel like it’s your lucky day. “...I’ve heard about you.”

Jimin snickers. “Have you?” he asks. “It’s a shame. My closest friend has kept me in the dark for months now.” he lets go of your hand and turns back to Jungkook. “So much so that I had to track him down myself.”

“Jimin,” Jungkook sighs. He didn’t have time for this now. 

Jimin’s eyes trail along Jungkook’s desk, witnessing pictures of Jinah, the adorable little girl that has so much of Jungkook’s personality that sometimes he swears she was created in a lab. His eyes fall on another picture, one that has his eyes squinting.

Immediately, Jungkook notices where Jimin’s eyes are focused. It’s of Ji-tae and Jinah, a picture that has been taken recently by you. It’s become one of his favorite pictures with how excited the two of them look holding their own ice cream cones, double scooped with disgustingly good amounts of toppings and fudge on it that it drips down the cone entirely.

Before Jimin can question anything, Jungkook speaks. “Yes, refreshments would be nice.” 

Jimin’s eyes snap upwards at Jungkook, before he turns back to you. Your heels click against the marble floor as you make your way towards the elevator. 

“I didn’t get your name.” Jimin calls just as the elevator doors open.

“That’s right.” you smile, entering the elevator. “Y/N.” you tell him, pressing the button to the lobby. You had to say it was well worth it to watch the grin on Jimin’s lips falter almost immediately at the sound of your name.

so i wanted things to be wrapped up in 3 parts, but knowing me you guys will be waiting for another 6 months LMAO and i cannot have that