Today's Document
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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ojovivo
occasionally subtle
$LAYYYTER
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

oozey mess

almost home

Origami Around
Sade Olutola
todays bird

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祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

Janaina Medeiros
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

seen from Canada
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@survivaltricks

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mafiosii.
“we can spend this time by trying to get to know each other,” wishful thinking. it’s always just wishful thinking — people hate this kind of thing, and even though a part of her understands it, she also believes it to be UNAVOIDABLE. the world is in ruins but there are still survivors … and to survive means having to trust some of them. that’s how groups are born, after all. trust is not rory’s specialty, but she’ll get there. she gives the older woman a grin, before she turns to examine where their assailants had lead them into. the idea of them being cornered makes rory’s blood boil — she refuses to accept that, she refuses to think that they have the upper hand. “a sniper, huh? he didn’t get you though, right?” the floor continue to make noise as she walks slowly. “we could wait but… to respect your wishes —” let’s not pretend that rory doesn’t recognize impatience. “– look, i could probably get him from here. where … i guess we have to find a way up top though. i don’t see one …”
she’s considering simply ignoring that offer , or acting as if she’s temporarily lost her sense of hearing. danneel , despite adopting the title of deputy , is not a chatty person by any means -- certainly not a GET-TO-KNOW-YA’ person. the pressure to socialise is surprisingly heavy , even in the apocalypse , and it’s a downright nuscience ! she’s grown found of the silence , but somehow she thinks silence wouldn’t be an answer this girl would take. ❛ which camp are you from again? ❜ good , easy ( but in reality , danneel is sniffing out the competition. FRIEND or FOE? ) danneel gives a shake of her head in response , eyes darting from the predator back towards the younger girl ; each creek of the floorboards beneath the other’s steps forcing danneel to hide a grimace ---- what if they hear them in here? danneel is far from the PEACEMAKER , would rather die than be forced to beg for her life , and she’d deny claims that she’s afraid of it , and yet , there’s a twinge of unease knotting her stomach at the thought of being cornered in here. she’s not dying in some dump ! ❛ no , i’m fine. ❜ she can’t feel anything atleast , and eyes briefly glance over herself to be sure before a brow raises in . . . apprehension. ❛ from here? you’re that good of a shot , huh? ❜ she supposes the girl has a point ( not that she’d admit the plan is slightly better than hers ; slightly. ) eyes turn back towards the scene , searching , as the men edge closer & their voices grow more pronounced ( ‘ no , i’m sure they went this way ! ‘ ) then , she presses a finger against the glass. ❛ there ---- just across the street -- there’s a fire escape. ❜ and her father said she couldn’t work as part of a team ; look at her now ! ❛ it should take you straight to him , bet they’d have fun picking us off though. ❜ lips purse in thought as she examines their surroundings ; eyes connecting to a set of stairs , buried amongst crap & abandonment. ❛ do you think you can get him from the second level ? ❜
— who’s in the shadows? who’s ready to play?
in her heart there’s a hole , there’s a black mark on her soul. in her hands is my heart , and she won’t let go ‘till it’s scarred.
i. game of survival. ii. human. ii. devil devil. iv. gods and monsters. v. weaker girl. vi. dark side. vii. horns. viii. no witness. ix. spider in the roses. x. bite.
Alicia Vikander for The New York Times (2015)
whenever somebody responds with “I beg your pardon?” assert your dominance by announcing “Then Beg.”

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ascetis.
@survivaltricks : ❛ why don’t you say what’s really on your mind? ❜
‘ you know damn well why. ’ he doesn’t say the obvious : it’s a loaded question, and vivian prefers keeping those as far away from him as possible. they’re overlooking the camp, now, staring down at the guards running through the motions of patrol, watching others settle down for the night. he reaches for the inside of his shirt pocket, mouth twisted into a frown, and draws out his pack of incredibly stale cigarettes. he lights one for himself and then offers them to danneel, eyes downcast.
‘ do you remember when we first met? ‘n how fucked up the both of us were? ’ it’s — strange, in the way his voice almost imperceptibly cracks, in the way his tone might waver for half a second. he doesn’t like looking back on the past, but sometimes they’ve got no choice. ‘ didn’t think we’d end up here. i thought we’d just eat each other’s faces off and rot like everybody else. ’
SHE KNOWS DAMN WELL WHY. she doesn’t push it , because questions like that can cause wounds that bleed out , wounds that stitches cant heal ; it’s precisely the reason danneel dodges them like stray bullets too. ❛ just saying , offer’s always on the table , viv. ❜ you can talk and i will listen is the translation for that one ; she doesn’t say it aloud , because she’s always been better at the SILENCES , but she means it all the same. ❛ these things’ll kill you , y’know , you should quit ---- thanks. ❜ she takes the offer despite her words , rolling the cigarette between her fingertips as she stares down at HOME ----- maybe not quite the word to be calling it. there’s nothing homely about fort point , but somehow , it FITS : she fits.
❛ mhm. ❜ she remembers. she had been on her own awhile before she met vivian ; a FERAL THING that had found her place in her solitary & not in the company of others , who had grown used to the dead and not the living. she specifically remembers not being too fond of the idea of that company , of a friendship , but it happened --- he grew on her , they grew together ( as cheesy as that sounds ! ) ❛ dude , i just had dinner. ❜ like she has such a sensitive stomach to these types of things ; she’s seen far worse than DEAD FLESH. eyes glance across at vivian with a raised brow , a ghost of a smile still lingering across her features. ❛ do you still like it here ? ❜ she’s sure she’s asked him similar questions before , probably once after they joined and again to make sure he was certain ; but sometimes , she looks down from her perch higher up & wonders what made her stay. what does this place have that they couldn’t get on their own? besides the people , which are a bunch of sour tempers with one basic desire to prove their masculinity ; danneel is sure she’s threatened three-quarters of them at one point or another for getting on her nerves. ❛ oh , and not to start any debates here , but you were much more fucked up than i was , so ---- light. ❜ the word is muffled as the cigarette is plopped between her lips , hand extended for the lighter.
bcprnihqs.
“You’re BLEEDING —–” he addressed her bloody brow with a slight gesture. “I promise I’ll leave you alone, but the Healer I’m about to bring over here definitely won’t and he’s probably more annoying than I am.” No, Beau … The Healer wouldn’t be. The young man couldn’t understand why everyone seemed to be so broody; to deny any form of aid that could benefit their survival.
❛ it’s just . . . IT’S JUST --- ❜ she sputters for something , the right words , an explanation for the dripping of blood against her olive brow. but every option leads to her looking like a complete klutz ; she’s not going to admit she fell head first into a pipe while fleeing from the undead now , is she? that would be too PAINFUL to her image. ❛ ----- a scratch ; but fine , alright , patch me up --- but quickly , i have places to be. ❜ not in her state she doesn’t , but danneel doesn’t want to make it seem like she’s being thankful for the aid ; imagine what that one would do to her image? even if it was much appreciated.
housewon.
————– 001. @survivaltricks ⁽ ˢᵃᶦᵈ ᵃⁿᵈ ʸᵒᵘ ᶜᵃⁿ’ᵗ ᵍᶦᵛᵉ ᵘᵖ. ᶦ ʷᵒⁿ’ᵗ ˡᵉᵗ ʸᵒᵘ. ‘ :^⁾ ⁾ starter meme ; accepting !!
another fruitless search. leans into the granite counter top & dips his head. it wasn’t as if incoming supplies was completely stagnant —– they did tax those who wished to pass through their barricade after all —– but he’d hoped for something more. anything to give them a leg up on the other communities. he’s too deep in thought to realize his pity party had been interrupted. his expression betraying him. he starts to speak before deciding against it & closing his mouth, fingers drum instead to cover his silence. lets her words circulate through his head. he doesn’t like to voice his concerns to just anyone. ❝ time passes and everything gets picked through. eventually we’re going to have to lean to be self-sufficient. ❞
❛ then we’ll learn. ❜ she says it with such force , such certainty that she convinces even herself for a moment ; but the question still lingers in the pause that follows : HOW? how long before they have to worry about resources ? before they have to start praying for scraps to be thrown their way ? they’re STRONG , they have a good thing going , but danneel fears they’re also at a disadvantage --- besides whomever pays to pass the barricade , their options of self-sufficiency are slim. it’s not like they can start FARMING their non-existent lands , all they have is a bridge and a brick compound. ❛ if the times get too tough , we could always go out further for scavenging , see what’s waiting for us out there. ❜ just a thought. , just offering suggestions to ease the troubles from her leader’s shoulders ; the weight of his grief will do none of them any good , and danneel has grown to respect the man too much to see him troubled like this. ❛ in the mean time , we’re sitting pretty. don’t let it eat you up too much , dawson , we’ll get through it --- we’re like COCKROACHES , ya’know? we always somehow survive. ❜ poetic.
Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2005) dir. Doug Liman
iichvr.
🙌 push/shove my muse | @survivaltricks ; ( nonverbal starters ) , accepting
❝ whoa , whoa , nell . ❞ he threw up his hands and gave her a non-threatening but stern look .
❝ i know you don’t like hearing it , but you need to calm down . ❞ he knew from plenty of experience that telling someone to calm down wasn’t always a good option ( rarely ever was ) , but the deputy was starting to wear his patience thin — and he was probably one of the most patient people still alive .
❛ calm down --- ? ❜ that earns another shove , just out of spite. ❛ i’m perfectly calm ! it’s you --- ❜ HIM , he’s doing that thing -- that thing where he’s trying to be nice , trying to be helpful ; the pushes & shoves are her attempts to fight against that gentleness he emits , as he tries to soothe the wounded animal. ( afterall , all she’s ever known is AGGRESSION. ) ❛ i didn’t need your help , i was doing just fine before you got here , reyes , you should be back at camp doing your job. ❜ she takes a step back and the limp on her left side is now evident ; no matter how hard she grits her teeth & pushes herself through the pain pulsing through her ankle --- they’re about a mile off camp , she presumes , a long ass mile , but she can do it on her own --- her pride is one hell of a motivator. there’s a pause before she speaks again , softer & much calmer , but just as stern. ❛ i’m not apologising. ❜

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white bed sheets, sunrise, lace, converse ( gimme the dirty deets )
❪ aesthetic asks. * ACCEPTING ! ❫
WHITE BED SHEETS: what is your night time routine?
❛ well , first i head down to the hub of fort point , pick out one lucky lucky lad from the pool of bachelors , and then i do this little trick with my tongue , you see , and —- wait , that’s not what you meant , huh. ❜ the facetious quirk of her lips is only visible for a second , before she sobers in disinterest. ❛ there’s not much of a routine anymore ; you don’t know from one day to the next if you’re even going to return back to camp , or even ALIVE for that matter —– but it’s just . . . waiting until everyone has retreated to their little holes , clean up the gunk i’ve accumulated from that day , and try to get some shut eye before the sun rises again. ❜ and repeat , and repeat , and repeat.
SUNRISE: pick a quote and describe what it means to you personally.
❛ the hunter must know their ground , their pack , and their quarry. ❜ it’s the first one that flashes through her mind , in her father’s booming voice as he shoves a rifle into her child palms & demands her to aim. ❛ not much of a quote really , more of a RULE i was taught — but i feel like it fits — it’s like . . . the basics of survival too. ❜
LACE: when was your last 3am conversation with someone, and who were they to you?
❛ 3am conversations were the norm at buckhorn tavern ; they were nothing but drunks and scoundrels who had no recollection of what they’d told me the following morning , it was entertaining at the time – got some juicy bits out of them , but never the other way around. ❜ she knows better ; danneel laundin isn’t one to let her guard down so EASY. ❛ that was before though – now? i don’t know . . . probably viv? he’s one of the only people i give a damn about to converse with willingly. ❜ he’s friend , he’s family , he’s just as much her BLOOD than her own bloodline. ( ft. @ascetis ! )
CONVERSE: would you ever have a deep conversation with a stranger and open up to them?
❛ a stranger ? no. ❜ there’s a struggle from her camp mates just to get more than her name out of her , maybe her favorite flavor of beef jerky if she’s feeling talkative , but the DEEP STUFF? fat chance ! ❛ and even if i did , for whatever foolish reason , i’d have to kill them — they’d know too much , ya’know ? ❜ depending on the circumstance , she’s not joking.
daisies & fairy lights !! <33
❪ aesthetic asks. * ACCEPTING ! ❫
DAISIES: what is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
HER GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENT? she ponders that thought for awhile & comes back empty-handed. danneel can’t recall a single moment in her lifetime , where she has felt HEROIC or proud over her actions , where it has been a rewarding experience & not a tragic one – sad , right ? she supposes leaving her childhood home and making something of herself is an achievement – she’s sure the people of lowell were utterly SHOCKED to learn she didn’t follow in the footsteps of her mother. ❛ does surviving the end of the world , count ? i feel like that’s one for the resume. ❜
FAIRY LIGHTS: if a crystal ball could tell you the truth about anything, what would you want to know?
❛ i mean , i guess the same thing all of us would ask if given the chance : where the fuck did that forrest fenn bury his treasure ? ❜ she sobers with a weary sigh , lifting her shoulders into a shrug. ❛ but really , the truth isn’t nearly as satisfying as we make it seem , and nothing -- not even truth -- is going to help the way the world is now , so why bother asking anything ? ❜
marble , stars !
❪ aesthetic asks. * ACCEPTING ! ❫
MARBLE: what is the most important thing to you in your life right now?
❛ my dignity , for one. ❜ truth , there’s nothing more important to danneel laundin than herself : she has been battered & bruised , but she hasn’t broken or crumbled , she was still herself — and that’s more than others could say. ❛ and my job too , i guess. fort point is the priority , afterall. ❜ most of the time.
STARS: when did you last cry in front of another person?
❛ think i was like . . . twelve? no , thirteen – found a stray dog on my way home from school. the thing was ugly & scrawny , think it was SICK & malnourished or something. ❜ but it was hers , it was something she owned – the first thing she had for herself , and she loved it. ❛ staffan didn’t like the idea of having the mutt hanging around , another mouth to feed & a total menace when it came to leaving it home alone – it chewed through the door frames and then continued to destroy staffan’s leather jacket the following day when he went to work & i had school —– the day after that it turned up dead and i was devastated. ❜ she doesn’t continue , because she doesn’t want the pity ; but she remembers wiping tears on the sleeve of her shirt as her dad pointed to the corner of the yard & told her that sniveling would get her nowhere , to grow up & BURY THE DAMN THING — she learnt pretty quickly that tears were considered a weakness in the midst of the laundin household , and unless you wanted a scathing lecture , you learnt to conceal them.
aesthetic themed ask list
flower crown: when did you last sing to yourself?
fairy lights: if a crystal ball could tell you the truth about anything, what would you want to know?
daisies: what is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
1975: what is the first happy memory that comes to mind, recent or otherwise?
matte: if you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living?
black nail polish: do you have a bucket list? if so, what are the top three things?
pantone: describe a person close to your life in detail.
moodboard: do you feel you had a happy childhood?
stars: when did you last cry in front of another person?
plants: pick a person to stargaze with you and explain why you picked them.
converse: would you ever have a deep conversation with a stranger and open up to them?
lace: when was your last 3am conversation with someone, and who were they to you?
handwriting: if you were about to die, and you could only say one more sentence to one person, what would you say and to whom?
cactus: what is your opinion on brown eyes?
sunrise: pick a quote and describe what it means to you personally.
oil paints: what would you title the autobiography of your life so far?
overalls: what would you do with one billion dollars?
combat boots: are you a very forgiving person? do you like being this way?
winged eyeliner: write a hundred word letter to your twelve year old self.
pastel: would you describe yourself as more punk or pastel?
tattoos: how do you feel about tattoos and piercings? explain.
piercings: do you wear a lot of makeup? why/why not?
bands: talk about a song/band/lyric that has affected your life in some way.
messy bun: the world is listening. pick one sentence you would tell them.
cry baby: list the concerts you have been to and talk about how they make you feel.
grunge: who in the world would you most like to receive a letter from and what would you want it to say?
space: do you have a desk/workspace and how is it organised/not organised?
white bed sheets: what is your night time routine?
old books: what’s one thing you don’t want your parents to know?
beaches: if you had to dye your hair how would you dye/style it and why?
eyes: pick five people to go on an excursion with you. who would you pick and where would you go/what would you do?
11:11: name three wishes and why you wish for them.
painting: what is the best halloween costume you have ever put together? if none, make one up.
lightning: what’s the worst thing you’ve ever done while drunk or high?
thunder: what’s one thing you would never do for one million dollars?
storms: you on only listen to one song for the rest of your life, or only see one person for the rest of your life. which and why?
love: have you ever fallen in love? describe what it feels like to realise you’re in love.
clouds: if you’re a boy, would you ever rock black nail polish? if you’re a girl, would you ever rock really really short hair?
coffee: what’s your starbucks order, and who would you trust to order for you, if anyone?
marble: what is the most important thing to you in your life right now?
fin.

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❛ well , only twenty eight more minutes of this . so i’m going to die . ❜
click here, snickerdoodle !
❛ well , only twenty eight more minutes of this. so i’m going to die. ❜ / * ( starter for @mafiosii !
a sigh of impatience fills the air as eyes , yet again , glance back over to the girl with lips set in a thin line -- danneel is a recluse if you’ve ever met one , and the thought of spending only twenty eight more minutes stuck with small talk & unwanted company was apparently a mutual displeasure. ❛ just a ray of positivity , huh? ❜ but she glances down at the watch resting on her wrist to confirm , before a arm lifts her up to glance out the cloudy window and into the scene that put them in this situation ------ danneel counts five men , including one sniper positioned higher up ; she knows because the bastard almost took out her ankle when she ventured out into the open ( apparently this was territory was occupied , who knew. ) she found herself faltering back into one of those hotel drisco folks , and they retreated for shelter in what looks like a picked clean home & giftwares store ( RETREATING -- danneel doesn’t retreat. ) she knows because these men were now tracking the WOUNDED ANIMAL. ❛ once sun sets , if we keep low and keep quiet , we can creep up & deal with them , or . . . . slip past , i guess , depending on your morals ---- ❜ they only had to survive twenty six more minutes. easy , huh !