mr. know it all

Chinhwa is enjoying simply observing Sungmin unwind a bit…it’s almost as if he can tangibly see the tension leaving the younger man’s body. That’s a good sign, to be sure. He watches curiously as his companion enjoys the fresh drink, knowing that nothing tastes quite as good as a drink that somebody else paid for. “Ah, that’s kind of you. You’d like them.” Chinhwa responds playfully, not sure if Sungmin actually will check out the new group or if he’s just making polite conversation. It’s no skin off his nose either way. “They’re still young and cute, as yet untainted by the insanity of our world. I almost miss being like that…” The CEO speaks wistfully, but chuckles, showing that he’s mostly just being a bit dramatic for the flair of it.

The vampire isn’t entirely certain how to take the comment about being reckless with money, as he wonders if it’s perhaps being somewhat directed at him. Chinhwa isn’t reckless, though, in fact, he’s anything but. He knows precisely how much money he has to spend at any given moment, it’s simply that that particular number is…enormous. “I can only imagine.” The CEO remarks casually, still grinning. “Then you’re left to figure out how to make it all work after their silly mistakes, hm? Must be annoying.” He nudges Sungmin, his expression sly. “People simply don’t understand how to invest properly anymore. It’s an art.”

Chinhwa motions the bartender over again, ready for a fresh one. He turns to Sungmin with an arched brow, questioning. “Care for another?”

Sungmin was so aware of Chinhwa’s ties to the Night Bloods, knew that every dollar spent supporting his business had a chance of being something that went into Night Bloods related activities, and yet he couldn’t quite commit to staying out of his ex employer’s business entirely. Because as much as he hated the Night Bloods, he did genuinely like Chinhwa, thought he was charming and clever and everything that the most successful CEOs should be. So, yes, as much as he would tell himself not to, he probably would end up checking out the new group, out of curiosity if nothing else. Sungmin let out a soft hum in response to the older’s words, couldn’t help but relate himself. “Don’t we all?” he responded simply.

“It’s so annoying,” Sungmin found himself agreeing, leaning forward against the bar as if he were a tipsy coworker blowing off steam after a particularly rough shift. “God, I miss working for you sometimes--- you spent a shit ton of money, but at least you didn’t blow half of it on shoes. Or--- or invest everything in a bar in a rough part of the city, when you know that area’s prone to break-ins,” he found himself rambling, probably the alcohol nudging at the back of his brain, but he felt like he needed to get that out, at least in the moment. “Accounting is hard, Chinhwa.” And that came out a bit more like whining than he’d intended it to, whoops.

it’s honestly a little sad how angry he feels, because anger has always been his worst, yet most powerful, weapon. throughout his role as an assassin with the howlers, he’s always used anger to fuel his fights. always motivated himself with rage, a keen desperation for revenge. and he knows he’s famous amongst the howlers for doing just that — his aggression shows in everything he does, all the weapons he wields. after all, who else would have crafted such monstrous maces as their weapons of choice if they weren’t looking for blood, constantly? weren’t looking to main and destroy their enemies, one little bit at a time? jaesun’s always been angry, always been consistently furious at the way the world has handed him his cards. but, even in this instance, he feels a different sort of anger. and he doesn’t want to feel anger.

he wants to feel more in-control of the situation, wants to let vulnerability show through a little. he’s tired of looking stony-faced all the time, lashing out at walls and floors and ceiling. tired of pretending he’s so much stronger than he actually is. and so, when sungmin stands up as well, jaesun does something he thinks he really shouldn’t. should behave less like a little kid, and more like a man. but he can’t help it, and normally it would be sam to see this unguarded side of him. he reaches out, latches a hand around the other’s wrist, and grits his teeth together. “i’m sad, hyung.” that’s all he says, about all he can say. he feels it, right in his marrow, knows and understands it well. he misses them all, so much. wants them to come back as soon as possible, wants them to be better already. “i’m sad, and i don’t know what to do with it.”

instead of elaborating, or embellishing, jaesun lets go soon afterwards, not wanting sungmin to respond. not wanting a reaction. not wanting an answer, or anything. he doesn’t want anything, but to simply let go of those words, instead of holding them so tightly against his tongue that he can feel his whole mouth cramping up with the urge. moving away, he nudges the tools closer to the wall with his foot so no one would trip over, and shoves both hands into his jacket pockets. “i’m not hungry.” he can’t eat properly, hasn’t been able to eat well at all, recently. not since the news. has hardly taken care of himself, but he doesn’t care enough about himself to feel sorry about it. “let’s just go. i just want to go and get the things, and come back. then fix the things. i just want things fixed.”

Sungmin was so busy tidying up their mess on the floor, getting all of the tools as put together and out of the way as possible before they left the Underground, that he didn’t even catch the mental turmoil until it was too late, until the younger grabbed at his wrist, causing him to spin around in concern, eyes locking on the young werewolf. I’m sad, hyung. Sad? No, no, he didn’t know what to do with that. It was anger, it was always anger with Jaesun, with the Howlers as a whole. Even when someone stepped into his office in tears, it was never a simple, defeated, ‘just wanted a place to cry’ kind of visit but a loud, sobbing, growling and letting out everything that plagued their mind kind. 

He didn’t have the slightest clue what to do with pure sorrow, and Sungmin found that he had no idea how to deal with it in himself either--- there was always something he could do to fix a situation, no matter how down he felt, there was always something he could do. He’d never felt quite like this, so defeated and full of sorrow, and the bookkeeper was finding himself going out on a limb, latching onto anything and everything that he could channel his emotion into. And maybe that looked a bit obsessive-compulsive from an outsider’s view, but it had been working thus far. “Jaesun-ah...” he trailed off, words failing him before he even began. But then again, the younger didn’t exactly look like he was fishing for comfort, for an answer, for anything. Perhaps he just wanted to speak that one thing into existence, let it be known, and move on. And Sungmin could respect that, opting not to try and say more but instead to just place a calming hand on Jaesun’s back, rubbing tiny circles in what he hoped could be a ‘me too’, a ‘you’re not alone’, a ‘let’s just get through this together, yeah?’.

Sungmin knew the answer was coming, and yet it still drew a quiet sigh from him to know that Jaesun was avoiding eating, that he probably had been ever since the incident. But he knew how Jaesun operated, and he knew that he wouldn’t take good care of himself until he no longer had others to worry about, so all he could really do at this point was hope and pray that all of them were back on their feet soon, or just well enough to convince him to take care of himself. “Yeah... yeah, let’s just get this done,” he agreed, hand still hovering over the younger’s back as he led him toward the main staircase leading out of the Underground.

Sungmin is a definite source of intrigue for Chinhwa, especially now. He hadn’t been particularly concerned with the man when he was under his employ…after all, there wasn’t anything that stood out. He was a looker, sure, but always kept mostly to himself, always seemed guarded. Sungmin is still the same in many ways, but there are a few subtle changes. He appears as someone who has seen a bit more of the world, more of its dark underbelly, the things that happen in back alleys through hushed whispers. That is what piques Chinhwa’s interest now, the stories untold. And he hopes to keep Sungmin around this time, if for nothing else to uncover just a few of those secrets.

The CEO chuckles lightly at the younger’s comment, glad he’s receptive to more alcohol and thereby more conversation. If there’s anything he knows about alcohol, it’s that it makes people talk. Say the things they wouldn’t sober, and that makes it a useful tool. “I thought you’d see it my way.” He purrs, taking a moment to flag the bartender down and order a refill of whatever the younger man had been drinking previously. A brow quirks at the question, and Chinhwa smirks. “Yes, of course. We just put out a new singing group, actually, and they seem to be doing quite well.” The bartender returns with the drink and the vampire hands it over to Sungmin. “Cheers. To old friends.” He teases, lifting his own glass in a toasting gesture.

He takes another sip of his own drink, polishing it off and setting it back down on the bar top. “On that note. How’s life in the…accounting world, I think you said?” Chinhwa chuckles, switching to a bit more of a playful mood, hoping it will losing the younger man up a little. “You crunching those numbers properly?”

Sungmin leans forward against the bar, elbow against the tabletop, propping his chin up on his hand. A tiny, almost satisfied smile tugs at the edges of his lips as Chinhwa follows through with the offer, ordering a drink for him--- he wasn’t spoiled in the slightest, was so used to earning every damn thing he had in this world all by himself, but being treated was so fucking nice. Receiving gifts for nothing more than friendly conversation was refreshing, and some deep part of his mind was screaming finally, convincing him that he deserved this, that a little bit of relaxation and meaningless conversation would do him so much good. Sungmin hums in response to the older’s answer. “Are they? I’ll have to check them out, then. Show my support and all.” The new drink passed to his hand was seeming more and more inviting by the second, and so he raised the glass without hesitation, briefly returning the toast before taking a long sip.

the more he thought on it, however, the more the temptation rose. the idea of reaching out and speaking to jaehyun about potentially organising revenge, pulling together the howlers who still remained in order to reinforce themselves, feels empowering. it still runs through his blood, the urge to tear down these walls and start anew. it still sings out to him, the deepest desire, the only one he’s known for so long — to get back at the people who had done this to him, who had hurt his family, and hurt his home. the underground may have been nothing to the outside world, but without this space, there was nothing left for the howlers. this is where they came when they were lost. this is where jaesun’s life had truly began, and so without the howlers with him, without the sturdy walls and the roof above him, he truly has nothing. it’s almost annoying to think he has to show restraint, that he has to hold himself back in terms of these endearments. all he wants to do is litter the city with his rage.

the idea of leaving to find replacement furniture — even that pissed him off. this had been an act of hatred, to purposely strike the howlers where it hurt the most. the fact that so much damage had been left in its wake only serves to further anger jaesun, push forth the compulsion to dish it back. to leave as much damage as the underground was riddled with. he, too, wanted to puncture walls and leave bullet holes behind, smash windows and take lives. he wanted to do all of that, purely to show the outside world the howlers were not simply toys to be played with. yes, while they were still vulnerable — and of course they are, they were all still human, after all — they were never to be brought down in this manner. not at all, never. not while jaesun can stand for it, not while jaesun still has his own strength with him.

hiding these thoughts from sungmin proved tough, however, as an exasperated sigh leaves his lips. hand drops the scraper by his feet and body leans forth to inspect a couple of the bullet holes, looking like gaping wounds in the walls. “can you come with me, instead? i don’t know who else to take, and i know the others probably have their own tasks, as well.” moving away from his current position, jaesun stands to stretch his legs out, feeling the blood rushing back down towards his feet, warm and itchy and irritating. yet another reminder that he’s sitting on his ass, sorting through menial tasks like this, and no matter the good cause behind it, he wishes he was out there. chasing down the enemy, giving them a piece of mind, ensuring that the scars he left behind on them never faded. he wants to tag the entire world, if he can, if only to keep the howlers out of their mouths, out of their plans. “we can go get some light fixtures too.” tilting his head back, jaesun looks up at the punctured ceiling, unable to fathom how the fuck the bullets climbed up here too. “we’ll need to fix all of that. do we have a ladder?”

Sungmin wasn’t a stranger to desperate times, and definitely not to desperate measures--- his entire life seemed to be one endless series of disasters and dilemmas, always forcing him to make hard decisions, sacrifices. He thought that the moment he’d joined a gang, he had forfeited that power, had handed over all decision making to a trustworthy leader and vowed instead to mindlessly follow directions, do his work and do it well without any other brain crushing tasks thrown his way. Because he had needed that. He had needed that break after what he had done, needed time to let his brain rest and settle into a comfortable routine.

And it had worked, for those few years, keeping him grounded enough to let himself loose, allow himself to form healthy relationships, a healthy mindset. But disasters were always worse when loved ones were involved, and the choices were only getting harder and harder each time they decided to make a comeback. Sungmin had never been one for physical violence, knew it to be necessary in this line of business but kept it out of sight, out of mind. But even he found himself supporting some type of revenge plan at the moment, knew if he had even the slightest more experience and less self control, he’d want nothing more than to bash in the skulls of the people that had done this to his family. But he didn’t. And keeping his mouth shut and his hands and mind at work was a specialty of his, something he’d perfected over the years.

Sungmin could tell that the younger was frustrated at his lack of ability to do anything about it, and truly, so was he, but keeping himself busy in the Underground was helping to clear those thoughts, if even just a little. Maybe keeping him busy would have the same effect on Jaesun. He hoped that was the case, at least. At Jaesun’s question, he glanced around the room, just to be certain that there wasn’t anything else that required his attention at the moment. “Sure,” he agreed, standing up to stretch as well, gently returning his tools to the floor in front of the wall. Sungmin’s eyes followed Jaesun’s gaze and he let out a heavy sigh, surveying the damage to the ceiling. “Not here, but I have one at home. We can swing by there on the way back. Have you eaten yet today? We can pick up a few energy bars or something as well.”

He’d been asleep for almost a day an half now, his body taking that time to heal while an onslaught of drugs and antibiotics coursed through his system. Three blood transfusions later and he was finally stable, no longer in critical condition though the tube down his nose pushed into his lungs to aid the breathing. It’d been a minute since he’d open his eyes, even before when he’d wake up in between he’d sit there with them closed, pray for death, beg his father to let him succumb to his injuries and join him where he’s at.  The pain was too great, the shame even greater, but this time he let his long lashes break apart the white light of the hospital room shining through.

The witch grunted in response, a soft sigh coming to his lips as his grey eyes were finally exposed to his surroundings. Someone was here, the familiar voice almost music to his ears, “unfortunately,” he said softly, his usual bitter tone apparent as he struggles to get the moisture back into his mouth, “how long have you been here Sungmin,”

Unfortunately. Sungmin feels a deflated huff escape him, eyes carefully roaming the face of his leader in contempt. Sam has obviously taken a toll physically, surely in a constant stream of pain, judging by the sheer amount of injuries crowding his relatively small frame. But whatever thoughts happened to be plaguing him might be arguably worse--- recollection of the events that had put him here in the first place, the knowledge that other people he cared about had been affected as well, couldn’t have been the slightest bit good for his mental health.

the idea of getting revenge tastes sweet on his tongue, is such a familiar vice for jaesun. his entire life, up until now, had been met with an ache for revenge. for righting the wrong, righting those who wronged him. it’s always been upon a dare, delicious yet bitter, a blistering, scorching urge to fix what others had ruined. it’s as if jaesun tears walls down with his bare fingernails until they bleed, until there’s nothing left but the exposed interior, enough for him to reach inside, grab, squeeze, until it all breaks between his fingers. but — and, quite possibly, the only reason he’s not moving forth at all — he had promised junho he wouldn’t do a thing. not a damn thing, not until everyone had returned home. even posing the idea of revenge to jaehyun was far too much.

“i shouldn’t.” he knows sungmin won’t tell him what’s right and what’s wrong, won’t try to dictate his decisions, or manipulate opinions. sungmin’s objective, always has been, and though he has his own thoughts, he’s never pushed them onto jaesun before. and jaesun feels guilty for even mentioning retribution before the other. “i won’t. we shouldn’t do anything. none of us. not until… sam’s back on his feet. or, at least, if jaehyun wants to assemble a team, then, who are we to stop him?”

it’s not a good idea, no matter the situation, so jaesun diverts his thoughts by busying his hands, focusing on the task at hand. the concrete mixture settles, but before it can solidify, jaesun takes a scraper to shove it against the bullet holes. he does the task quickly, roughly, but with as much calculated precision as he can. he takes no job lightly, but nor does he have time to waste either. “what else is there around here to do, sungmin?” the question is a soft murmur under his breath, voice lowered so only the other can hear, hands still moving as fast as they can. “lay it on me. i’m going to be here until everything is finished. whatever there is to do, i’m doing it all.” he doesn’t want rest, doesn’t need it. the underground needs to be repaired, and quick.

Sungmin doesn’t bother turning to face the younger as he thinks out loud, not wanting to interrupt his train of thought in any way, and so he keeps his gaze on him out of the corners of his eyes instead, simply nodding in acknowledgement after each notion in some sort of reassurance that he’s still listening. And really, he’s proud of Jaesun for taking the time to think this through logically, stopping himself from acting out in pure emotion before recognizing the consequences. For as long as Sungmin had known him, Jaesun had always been quite impulsive, a simple ‘act first, think later’ type--- it must have been how the younger had managed to get himself injured so fucking often. 

“Yeah. I’m sure Sam and everyone else would like to have their say in it. Let’s just focus on repairing everything internally first, yeah? We’ve got people to help recover and funds to replace and a building to repair. That’s enough responsibility for now, I think.” And that was his honest opinion, formed even as he spoke, but that didn’t mean that his opinion meant much when it came to the grand scheme of things. It was what he would tell Jaehyun in the event that he asked for his advice, but the acting leader’s decision would be final, and Sungmin would support him either way. 

Sungmin busies himself beside Jaesun, filling in the holes on his half of the wall in mirroring actions, though his gaze slips occasionally to check on the other, make sure he’s not spending too much time in his head. Repetitive tasks like this were meant to be almost therapeutic, a way to wipe the mind of stressful thoughts. Sungmin sighs softly at the younger’s question. “A lot. There are a few overhead lights that need to be replaced, as well the windows in some of the office doors. A lot of general clean up too.” He had been there for hours prior to even inviting anyone to help, after all, surveying the damage and listing a full report on everything that needed to be done. It was his job and it was what he did well, so throwing himself into something so familiar had helped him, in some way, to center himself. “I can give you my card if you wanna take a few others out to buy some replacement tables and chairs, a lot of them are damaged beyond repair.” Sungmin knows that Jaesun is so determined, maybe out of survivor’s guilt or a need for distraction, but he’d much rather the younger focus his attention on such tasks than allowing his thoughts to become destructive.

Honestly, had Chinhwa run into Sungmin shortly after he disappeared….yea, he might have been more upset. Demanded answers. But not now. When you’ve been on the planet as long as he has, grudges tend to be not so important in the grand scheme of things. The only time he’d actually bother seeking revenge or the like is if someone either stole from him or fucked up one of his lines of business. Sungmin had done neither, really, as finding a new assistant had been easy. Many would die for the opportunity to serve him, and the vampire likes it that way.

He can’t help but chuckle at the younger man’s answer, just as vague as the others have been. “Well, that’s awfully specific.” Chinhwa teases, giving Sungmin a playful nudge just for the hell of it. It’s clear he’s not going to get information out of the man very easily, but that just makes the vampire more curious. What is he hiding? What is he running from? Must have been something. Chinhwa is nothing if not perceptive, and he knows a man on the run when he sees one.

“Ah, is that so?” He notes the concern in his former employee’s eyes, wondering just what the boy has managed to get himself into. “That’s a shame. I’m sure they’ll turn up eventually.” He offers the best reassurance he’s able to, considering he doesn’t know much of the situation. If a gang is involved, there’s truly no telling what could have happened to Sungmin’s friend. The streets are a dangerous place, nowadays. “In the meantime..” He begins slyly, hoping to offer an adequate distraction. “Can I perhaps buy you another drink?”

Sungmin couldn’t help but crack a lopsided smile in response to the elder’s teasing, eyes rolling playfully because, well, what was he expecting, really? The skinwalker didn’t owe his old boss any sort of information--- even back when he was working for him, he tended to keep quiet about his personal life, communicating merely what he had to in order to do his job and nothing more. 

Not that Sungmin was particularly isolated. He was fairly open, really, around people that he trusted. But when he had known Chinhwa, he was at a state in his life when he couldn’t allow himself to trust anyone and his boss was no different. Now that he was aware of the types of people that Chinhwa worked alongside, especially now that he had made himself into an opposing force to those people, Sungmin wasn’t sure that he’d ever be able to fully trust the elder. But that didn’t at all mean that he didn’t enjoy his company. Chinhwa may have been one of the most interesting people Sungmin had ever met, to be entirely honest--- he had never minded being in his presence.

the fall of sungmin’s expression almost has guilt eating away at jaesun’s stomach. but he knows the other means well, and holding up a facade isn’t something that jaesun’s ever felt comfortable with. he doesn’t need to do it to face the others — he’s transparent, prefers it that way. he always strives to be honest, always wants to imagine that the howlers need complete openness to go about their tasks. after all, even on duties, it’s harder to work when there’s a looming of black clouds over them, and the sun desperately trying to break through with white lies. it’s much easier to let the black clouds consume them, let themselves work their way out, than to have someone hold their hand the whole way through. jaesun’s always thinks like this, always wonders if he can ever develop this into something a little more.

the mention of the bullets… his fists curl up tight by his sides. he doesn’t know how much longer he can deal with this in complete silence, wants to go ahead and shout it from a rooftop — this is complete and utter bullshit. their leader had been taken by this, and two of their very best, as well. jaesun’s heart has been sitting on the line since he heard the news, and it hasn’t been pleasant. he doesn’t want to feel like this constantly, doesn’t want to worry about the fact that sam, junho, hisoka — all of them, are elsewhere. even mino and lena weren’t in their best states, though their conditions seem harder to keep a track of. jaesun frowns. “those fuckers really had it out for us, huh?”

he doesn’t mean to be so crass. but it’s difficult to hold his tongue, wants to throw insult after insult until the flames grow enough to engulf him. wants to fan the fire, wants to fuel it, feed it. wants to feel that anger burning him apart from inside out, ripping him from his skin and tending to his blood. “let’s do this first, then.” heading towards the back wall without a second glance at sungmin, jaesun tries to avoid driving a foot right through it. the bullet holes run astray, amuck, and he detests them. here they are, the markings of the howlers’ downfall. where the others had been attacked in cold blood, so cruelly, and in their own home. fuck. jaesun wants to rip his hair out in rage. “sungmin.” his hands shake a little, and he shoves them against his thighs when he crouches down. “we need to take revenge. not now. but soon. we need to do something about this.”

Sungmin could feel the tension radiating from Jaesun beside him and, truthfully, he felt much the same when faced with the wall of bullet holes before them. It was chaotic and lethal and it was clear that the shooters had no intention of going after one specific person. This was an attack on the Howlers as a whole and the attackers were trying to take down as many of them as possible. And that was personal. That was blatant malice toward their gang, their family. How could anyone expect them to be okay after that? Any of them? If they weren’t a victim, they could only consider themselves a future target, and that mixed with the pain of almost losing people that they loved, well... that was dangerous. That was volatile.

Those fuckers really had it out for us, huh? Yeah. Yeah, they did. Sungmin wouldn’t have worded it quite like... well, that, but the thought was running through his mind nonetheless. A hum of agreement escaped his lips. “The shooters either wanted us all dead and just weren’t skilled enough to accomplish it, or they were trying to get a rise out of us for some reason. Kind of a shitty way to go about it, either way.”

A soft sigh escaped Sungmin’s lips as Jaesun agreed, and he followed close on his heels, that goddamned wall coming closer into view. They shouldn’t feel such anger at this picture, should they? After all, this was an accurate count of how many bullets missed, how many times any one of their friends could have been done in but weren’t. And that was kind of a miracle, wasn’t it? This wall held dozens of little miracles. Sungmin crouched down beside Jaesun, tugging toward himself supplies they’d need to make more concrete to fill the holes. He hardly even looked up as the younger spoke, only nodding understandably in response. “Take that up with Jaehyun,” he suggested simply. He was just the bookkeeper, after all--- a bit of a glorified accountant, really. “But... I agree. This was a personal attack, we can’t just let it go.”

Chinhwa notes how quick the younger man is to snag another drink, chuckling. Might as well lower those inhibitions a bit, he supposes. The CEO’s purposes are innocent enough, truly. He’s just making polite conversation, and hopefully will be able to discover something interesting about his former employee. He snorts at Sungmin’s sarcastic comment, shaking his head a little bit as he takes another long sip of his drink.

“I’m not worried about a thing, love.” The vampire admits with a slight shrug. “I’m merely curious. So long as you’re satisfied with your life, I suppose that’s good enough for me.” Chinhwa is certain there were reasons other than what Sungmin has offered as to why he left….after all, no one just disappears off the grid for nothing. But the CEO is certain he won’t find these answers out right away, especially with Sungmin as guarded as he currently is. All in due time.

“This old friend you’re waiting for…” Chinhwa begins, a brow quirking up. “Anyone I might know?” The CEO knows a lot of people, after all. Anything is possible.

The way that Chinhwa called him love was all too familiar, but not entirely unwelcome. It had meant everything for his self esteem back then, really, his boss’s casual flirting. He was young and wide eyed back then, after all, a low life doing his utmost best to fit in with old money, and to feel desired in any way, shape, or form gave him that last bit of confidence he needed to succeed. And he almost did succeed. Almost.

As long as you’re satisfied. Sungmin was surprised by that statement, sure his former boss would be drilling him for as much information as he could possibly get his hands on. He had up and disappeared on him without a trace, so Sungmin wouldn’t blame him, really, if he wanted some sort of explanation. But that was something that he could never give to him, because no matter how much he didn’t mind allowing Chinhwa to have that closure, the older man still had ties to the Night Bloods and Sungmin could never allow that information to get back to them. That was a death sentence, clear cut.

being at the scene is… overwhelming. surreal. to think — so many of them gunned down in this very spot here. and jaesun’s late to see it with his own eyes, hasn’t been able to prepare himself to do so. hasn’t figured out the best way to navigate through this fear. instead of facing it front on, he’d waited until word had passed around. a brigade of sorts, the unscathed howlers banding together to repair the underground. after all, the underground is their area, almost like a home. their business conducts itself, and bonds grow stronger under this roof. it’s difficult to grasp, to allow another group to grasp at victory for the mess they caused. it’s been difficult to accept that very fact, when so many of their own were caught up and healing, close to losing their lives.

tears sting the backs of jaesun’s eyes, but he forces them back. no. not the time. there will be a moment to crumble later on, when he’s alone again, yearning after their missing. for now, sungmin is relying on him, and he knows even hanjae will be flitting around somewhere as well. he thinks, he should really check up on the latter eventually, concerned that the latter may be slipping back into bad habits instead of prolonging the torture. and so this day is for them, for the howlers — jaesun will roll up his sleeves, will do what he can to get the place patched back up again. he’ll work hard for sam, so that their leader can come back — though bloodied and bruised — with less of a pain in his heart.

sungmin’s physicality grounds him from his thoughts, brings him out of the clouds. jaesun doesn’t fake a smile, can’t do it, even though the older male seems to find it easier to comfort. jaesun’s given up on comforting, knows that gentle touches and little grins can go a long way — but he can’t, doesn’t have the strength for that. he’s mustered all his energy into healing the underground instead. he’ll work hard here, instead of worrying about the past, or future. now’s all about the present. “what can i help with?” getting down to business straight away, jaesun drops his backpack down by a corner — filled with miscellaneous supplies, aided by certain neighbourhood critters, always wanting to pry a curious eye into stranger’s situation. anything that can help will be used to help. “delegate me a task. i’ll get right on it.”

Cleaning up the Underground was a split second decision, born out of the threat of a breakdown without some sort of distraction. Because Sungmin was an emotional mess buried under layers of practiced composure and fake smiles. He was so utterly attached, but he was a businessman with a poker face like no other and keeping his emotions in check was an art mastered over years of deals and meetings surrounded by sharks who could smell the slightest bit of uneasiness. And he didn’t like that about himself--- hated it, even, how he’d become something so similar to everything about the upper class that he opposed, but he couldn’t deny that it worked in his favor. Today, he was going to be whatever everyone around him needed and that was that.

And the soft smiles and comforting words seemed to be working well enough, at least, putting most of the Howlers at ease as they stepped through the Underground’s main doors, sending them off to focus their feelings into something more productive. Jaesun, though--- Jaesun was different. Not that Sungmin was the least bit surprised by that. The younger had always been a bit more straight forward, more eager to get to the point rather than deal with the unnecessary. And that was okay. That was more than okay, actually. Keeping up an expression so opposite to how he felt was so much more tiring than it looked, and Sungmin didn’t mind taking a break from that, if only for a bit.

He allowed the corners of his lips to take a rest, expression falling into something a bit more neutral, not quite the inner turmoil that he was feeling, but not so utterly cheery. A perfect poker face. “Anything. There’s a lot that needs to be done.” At that, he glanced around the room, surveying which tasks the others who’d already arrived had chosen to focus their attention on. There were a couple with brooms out, sweeping up debris from opposite sides of the room until they’d eventually meet in the middle, others moving and rearranging objects as needed. “Why don’t you help me start filling in these holes? That needs to be done first, so that we can paint over it,” he offered, gesturing toward the back wall, which had caught most of the stray bullets.

Chinhwa nods his thanks to the bartender when he receives his new drink, leaning casually against the bar and looking at Sungmin. The younger man looks very much the same as he did when they last met, perhaps a bit rougher around the edges. He chuckles knowingly at his former employee’s comments, taking a small sip of his drink before speaking again. “Yes, well…funny how life happens that way, I suppose. Never know who you’ll run into.” He notes that Sungmin won’t meet his gaze, and that amuses him to no end…it’s clear the man is still afraid of him at least to a small degree. The CEO likes having power over people, after all, that’s kind of his job.

“So…” He begins, making small talk just because why not make things just a touch more awkward? “What have you been up to, then? Since you disappeared on me, I mean. Conquering the world, I hope?” His voice is light and teasing, showing that he’s not actually upset with Sungmin. It was a while back and its water under the bridge by now, but boy, is it entertaining making the other man uncomfortable.

Sungmin ungracefully downed the rest of his drink, gesturing toward the bartender for another before they could manage to leave after delivering Chinhwa’s. He wasn’t one to drink excessively, really, just a few sips here and there, but right then he really felt as if he needed it. Because sober Sungmin was far too uncomfortable in Chinhwa’s presence at the moment. And if there was any version of himself that could find confidence in literally any situation, it was tipsy Sungmin. 

he feels so stupidly restless. hands have itched for so long to do something, to participate and help piece the howlers back together again, to pick up the pieces. but it’s not easy for one person to do it all, to shoulder all the burdens, and it’s part of why leaving the responsibilities for sam and sungmin is so tough for jaesun to understand. he doesn’t like it, even though he knows they’re the gang’s frontrunners and need to take that responsibility upon themselves. he has to learn to accept it, even if his body wishes he can do more than simply sit on his ass all day. moving towards the sofa at sungmin’s invitation, he simply nods his head, looking over the surrounding area and trying to make sense of it all.

“how, though? how do we pull through?” his voice grows a little quiet, because he simply cannot understand. how are they going to escape this? how do they get out unscathed? it makes no sense, but it’s better than nothing. it’s better than being entirely hopeless, even if the hope he harbours hasn’t resulted in anything at all. outside of everything, it’s easier to remember that the howlers are still all together, all alive at this very moment, and very much a unit right until the end. there is no doubting that — for what jaesun lives for, the howlers make up a large proportion of his existence. he doesn’t live for anything else, wouldn’t dream of things being otherwise.

a thought strikes him, but it’s so innocent and naive that he thinks maybe sungmin might laugh at him. “what if i get a job? like, an actual job. something where someone else pays me.” his voice is even quieter now, almost timid, and he’s never been one to be timid with his suggestions. the foundation of the howlers lay in the way the individual members run their lives. hisoka already has her own full-time gig outside of being a part of the gang, and jaesun can take the lead from her example. he doesn’t have any specific talents, and can’t stand being filmed and plastered all over the internet — but odd jobs here and there, he can handle. “would that help, at all…?”

The tone in Jaesun’s voice sounded desperate, hopeless, like he had already accepted the idea that there was nothing that they could do outside of extreme measures, and that was heart wrenching, a sad smile tugging at the corners of Sungmin’s lips. A hand found its way to Jaesun’s shoulder, squeezing once in reassurance. “We stick together, keep the faith. We don’t let this tear us apart.” And they could do that, really, Sungmin had no doubt. The Howlers were so tightly knit that there wasn’t any room left for anything to come between them. This was a problem that their closeness wouldn’t be enough to fix, sure, but it was better than nothing and it was the only thing that the general population of the gang should be concerned with at the moment.

And he felt bad, even, for leaving so many of them uninvolved, in the dark about whether or not they could fix this, but telling them the truth wouldn’t help much with morale either. Sam had explicitly stated that this was his problem and his problem alone, that he didn’t want anyone to play hero, to try to fix this at any cost to themselves. Sungmin was instructed the same, after all--- his job was to aid Sam in finding a solution, not to make any sort of sacrifices for the good of the gang. That was all on Sam. Sungmin loved him, he really did, and he thought that he was shouldering too much of the burden, when there were so many other people willing to help out, himself included. But he was still his leader, and he’d respect his final decision no matter what.

“A job?” Jaesun’s idea didn’t surprise him, really. It was bound to happen soon enough, members of their gang turning to outside sources for cash. And that was understandable--- it had worked out well enough for people like Hisoka, after all. Sungmin took that moment to scoop a mound of noodles into his mouth, stalling as he thought up an eloquent answer. “It would be helpful to you, yes. I’m not sure we’ll bring in enough income for a while to pay everyone the usual amount, so an outside job might be useful. But Jae...” he sighed, trying to find the words to explain. “Sam really doesn’t want anyone’s help. He won’t even accept my help, just the financial guidance. Not saying that I agree with it, but he won’t accept sacrifices. Trust me, I’ve tried.”

That did boost his ego, thank you very much. Jiwon did a small, satisfied wiggle in his seat, rolling his shoulders back with a goofy grin on his face. He always liked knowing people enjoyed spending a lot of time in his cafe, not just for the great coffee, but also for the conversation. He really did like making friends with his regulars, and Sungmin here was no exception to that. 

“I hope everything works out for the better, man,” he wished he could offer help aside from words, but truly, there probably wasn’t much he could do. He was a simple man who owned a simple shop in a city that was anything but simple. He liked to help people in need- that’s why a lot of his employees were students trying to make ends meet, some of them were homeless or at risk of losing their homes- and he always hated when he had to let someone like that go, but he gives everyone a fighting chance.

“Yeah, the kid’s name is Jaesun- he’s real cute,” Jiwon grinned, “He’s got a weird schedule, so if you manage to catch him, put him through the ringer for me. He’s been learning, but hasn’t been put to the test yet,” which was true. He’d been on the basics, as no one really ordered anything too hard, and most of the drinks Jiwon offers at his store has a cheat sheet in a little binder on how to make it, just in case. Even harder drinks had a reference point to go off of, but there was nothing in the book on asshole customers who’s orders are so complex the receipt is nearly a novel. If Jaesun could handle that, the kid would be the best employee he’s had in over a year. 

Sungmin watched his friend do his tiny, wiggly victory dance, and a fond smile fell over his lips. He really was grateful that he’d made friends with someone like Jiwon, someone so completely detached from his work life that he could allow himself to be entirely careless with him, pushing all of his anxieties aside for the moment to just enjoy some good coffee and good company. Dealing with gangsters and assassins and needy supernatural dongsaengs all day had become a bit of a routine, easy for Sungmin to fall into but also easy for him to lose himself in. Sometimes he just needed to clear his mind and heart and pretend for once that he led a normal life. And that was laughable, really.

Jiwon’s words didn’t offer much help, physically, but just the thought was enough to raise Sungmin’s spirits if only by the tiniest bit. He was easy at heart, really, could be brought up simply by the thought that someone cared. “Thanks, I hope so too,” he conceded. And he really didn’t want to think too hard about it right now, so he didn’t. Just ended it there, no further discussion. The Howler situation would still be waiting for him when he got back to his office, so why fret about it now when he was supposed to be taking a break?

“Jaesun, huh?” Sungmin’s tone sounded surprised, though in all reality, he wasn’t. The prospect of Jaesun actively seeking a second job didn’t faze him in the slightest--- the kid was a hard worker, and he was determined to do whatever he possibly could on his own. And after what had happened with the Howler, he’d finally broken down and temporarily taken up shelter with Sungmin, but he had a feeling that was as far as Jaesun would allow it to go. Good for him for taking initiative, really, but he better not overwork himself. He needed to eat and sleep and keep healthy habits, no matter how much more money he thought he needed. “Oh, I’ll definitely stop by for him. And I’ll put him to the test, no worries.”

@sungminvc

It wasn’t very often Hisoka found herself at Sungmin’s house with a small overnight bag, despite him being one of her most favorite people in the world, but as soon as the possibility of Sam and Honey gettin’ it on at her place became a thing, suddenly it was time to go visit the book keep. That’s how the twenty-one year old woman found herself on the underground, bag slung over her shoulder and her phone clutched in her hand as she watched the shit show of a group chat unfold.

First off, she was mad as hell that she’d already gotten on the subway and was more than halfway to Sungmin’s place by the time the fight had started- Honey was playing the victim again, and Sam was being an ass about it. Now, Hisoka thought her adoptive father was being a little harsh because he was jealous, but the more and more Honey fought back, the worse the things Sam was saying got. She didn’t understand much of it, or why it was so important that it hurt Honey the way it did, but Hisoka could recognize when too far was too far. Her stop came, can she realized she couldn’t stop Sam from going that extra mile to make it hurt, so she put her phone in her back pocket and continued her trek.

Truly, she was worried for them. Sam could be a mean son of a bitch sometimes, but Honey got too fixated- too one track minded to see clearly. Now had things been different, had it been strictly professional it might have worked. Ace wasn’t mean, just strict and stern- Sam though, when he got upset, could be mean. The fact that their…arrangement, whatever it was, was personal, so now there’s this volatile Molotov cocktail in the group chat of feelings exploding everywhere. Hisoka was so lost in thought she had barely realized her feet had carried her all the way to Sungmin’s place. She sighed and knocked 8 time, just like always, “Sungminnie, I’m here. Open up, this shit’s ridiculous and I need some water,” she was already whining- she didn’t like it when people were upset, especially if it made things tense within the gang.  

Sungmin’s phone sat unlocked and face-up on the counter beside his stove as he absentmindedly stirred the pan of fried rice before him, eyes following the conversation develop in the Howlers group chat. Everything had been fine at first, or as fine as things could be in a chat consisting of the rowdy members of their gang. It was all memes and innuendos until Honey mentioned seeing a CEO and brought up a familiar name, and Sungmin couldn’t stay silent after that, opting to step in and warn the second in command against meeting up with this guy. And for a moment, he was almost hopeful that Sam had convinced Honey not to go, but of course, it was all downhill from there and it had somehow ended with an overwhelming lovers quarrel right in the middle of the group chat, unfolding before his eyes.

sungmin’s insistent, so jaesun tries to stop arguing against it. he always feels like a bother in situations like this — always feels it’s better if he simply strays from asking for advice, from asking for refuge or anything else. he’s been bouncing around from place to place, trying to find a sense of stability while he finds himself. and though he doesn’t want to bother certain people, bothering sungmin still invokes a similar sense of guilt within him. he hadn’t expected it, as he knows sungmin’s always been forgiving, incredibly accommodating. but it’s difficult when it comes to letting himself be taken care of, even babied — he’d rather rough it up than come off too vulnerable, even in front of the other howlers. they may be his family, but he still has his pride.

“i haven’t eaten, but i’m also not hungry? if that makes any sense.” jaesun’s eyes stray across the living area, surprised by how much is strewn about, and a strange urge in him wants to rip everything apart. after the hit against the howlers, and their most prized possessions — more like their lifeline, but jaesun doesn’t want to dwell on that part — he’s only ever felt rage. it’s put everyone in such a difficult position, put everyone in a place less than desirable. part of him really wants to call it quits on everything and leave entirely, live life as a lone wolf and die that way as soon as possible. it’s a lot easier than having these human feelings, and wanting to work so hard to save people when he can’t. nothing he can do in this situation would make it better, and he despises himself for it.

he moves to watch sungmin retreating into the kitchen then, and jaesun drops a last message before vacating towards the guest room. “hyung, don’t worry about making me anything. i’m really not that hungry.” it’s more of a loss of appetite than anything else. truthfully, he should eat soon before he loses consciousness because of it, but the comfort of the guest room rids that fear entirely. he should sleep too. he should do a lot of things, but none of them is going to get done, knowing him. dropping his bag onto the bed, jaesun’s eyes roam the room — it’s familiar, but at the same time, it isn’t. he doesn’t spend an awful amount of time at sungmin’s place or anything, but he still knows the room enough to avoid stepping on toes. deciding against unpacking, he pads back out once more, hands shoved into his pockets. “have you made any progress…?” though his words are vague, the meaning is simple — what were they going to do, the howlers?”

At his words, Sungmin threw a look over his shoulder in Jaesun’s direction, though it fell on blind eyes as the younger was too busy glancing aimlessly around the living room. Whether he had an appetite or not, Jaesun needed to eat regularly, and he was going to feed that boy whether he liked it or not. Maybe he’d just add a bit extra to his own plate and offhandedly offer him bites of it. That was a tactic that Sungmin found to work plenty of times with the younger Howlers who refused his help--- sometimes if aid was offered in smaller portions, that seemed as if they took less out of him, they’d feel like less of a bother for accepting it. He’d been using the tactic on Junho for nearly a year now, picking him up spare parts while he was out rather than straight up offering him the money to do whatever repairs he needed. It seemed to be working well enough.

Sungmin let out a heavy sigh as he made his way into the kitchen, simply warming up leftover japchae. At least Jaesun was on his way to the guest room, no longer arguing with him about accepting help in that field. That was good, that was a start. And really, Sungmin was proud of him for just that much. Now, if only he could get him to eat something, that would be nice. In his guest’s absence, he warmed up his plate, stabbing a set of metal chopsticks into the mess of noodles for safe keeping as he made his way back into the living room. It was a bit messy, but Sungmin really didn’t feel the need to clean up, instead simply nudging papers out of the way to clear a spot on the coffee table to set his plate. 

As Jaesun made his way back into the room, Sungmin dropped onto the sofa, patting a spot on the cushion beside him in invitation. The younger didn’t specify what he meant by his question but, really, he didn’t have to. There was only one thing that Sungmin truly needed to make progress on right now, and it was plaguing his mind. A heavy sigh escaped his lips. “A little,” he answered simply, eyes roaming over the stacks of papers on the coffee table. “It’s a tight situation, I’m not gonna lie. And we definitely don’t just have the funds lying around somewhere to repair the Howler right away, but... we can do it, I think. We always manage to get through stuff like this together, I’m sure we’ll pull through.” How, he wasn’t quite certain, but someone would come up with something, they always did. There was no way Sam was just going to let this all slip through his fingers. He was one determined bastard.