thank you google for reassuring me that my small penis is normal and its just that it gets scared because my muscles are sooo big and that's where all the blood is going So yeah its just hiding somewhere yeah probably within the recesses of my vagina or perhaps a bathroom drawer

the walgreens we go to always has some dumb shit going on I was standing there in a daze staring at protein bars tuning out the sound of well im not sure likely a crackhead hooting and hollering when my partner suddenly snaps me out of it to tell me that a man just entered the store and loudly announced: "my boyfriend is gonna be here soon, please point me to the vaseline section!!!" ...I thought maybe it was a joke, i mean, what else could that possibly be, but sure enough we go to check out and here comes this scrawny, dirty, disheveled half-toothless old guy with a big wooden walking stick, and he gets in line behind us. Puts his stuff on the counter. A chocolate bar... and a jar of vaseline. He notices me observing his purchase. "I shouldn't be getting this chocolate– my boyfriend says I need to watch my waist.........But I'm not watching MY waist, I'm watching HIS!!" ...I stared, tired and torn between my natural inclination to tune out any cracktivities and a desire to engage with this new type of person, a combination of traits which I've never encountered all in one slap to the senses. A moment passes. "He's a very handsome man," he adds. "I'm sure he is," I say, taking a second to observe the man's worn-down attire. In hindsight, I would love to know what was going on there, but I didn't exactly want to hang around this particular location long enough to check. Apparently someone's been holding people at gunpoint in the parking lot and stealing their phones. Shrug. I just leave my phone at home now. Besides, his boyfriend's arrival seemed rather imminent, and of utmost importance, and involving vaseline. Best not to ask too many questions. What am I, Vice? I would love to start a youtube series where I interview the people at my neighborhood walgreens at 10pm on the weekdays tho. But, you know... there's the whole holding people at gun point thing going on rn..........

Last accidental repost was idk sometime last year and it had to have been up for 6 months before I realized lmfao... it was this video of a pretty passive aggressive 20 yo woman talking about how u need to stay as far away from Insecure Women as possible cuz they all want you to hate yourself they'll drain you and bring you down and you are who you surround yourself with... for whatever reason whilst scrolling I managed to hit repost... praying nobody actually saw that because it would be a super offputting video for someone like me to choose to kick off my repost section with... like ok sure I can understand the sentiment but the whole thing was very Impressionable 20 Year Old Straight Woman....... yes its good to be intentional about who u surround yourself with but thankfully at my ripened age I am not too overly impacted by the mental problems of every single person in proximity to me, within reason, like yes my partners wellbeing is my business, but this woman clearly wasn't targeting Weird Dykes Pushing 30 and it seemed more like advice for teen girls who still haven't figured out how to exert their boundaries whatever man my algorithm will throw anything at me because im rarely on there and what i choose to stop and watch is beyond any sort of logic that could be comprehended by algorithmic calculation. But yeah uhhhh lol I just know they made the repost function sneaky like that on purpose so people dont even notice when they've done it lol #disfiguredbabiesonyourfeed