30, she/hers. On and off tumblr but mostly on Chinese social medias. And Iām so tired of my other blog being censored // MAY have NSFW content (so please watch out for the tags) Youhavebeenwarned
Main: @teatham š I rarely use it now due to old artworks being flagged as mature, then the whole blog was marked as matureš . I am predominately active here.
All drawings under #moi art
Feel free to commission me at Vgen
Watch out for my tw tags, and I sometimes draw gore/guro.
Always #1 OTP: MobEku (I made a 100 pages doujin for them I will never shut up about my OTP, you can read the first part here (itās in Chinese š )
Current Obsession: Bucktommy (cursed copaganda has cursed me this is my fate now)
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Idk who to tag, but I want to join the partyyyyyyyy
A bit of preface: Carla met Shannon and then they both befriended Abby.
SHANNON LIVES!! LET SHANNON HAVE A LIFE AND LIVE!
Thoughts?
They became friends easily, the three of them. Shannon was meant to surrender that morning Carla picked her up from the public parking lot across Social Service. Carla and her were not friends-like at first. Carla probably took pity on her, and decided to keep her around as a charity project.Ā
Regardless, it kept Shannon afloat long enough.
With Carla came Abby. āI think you two can be good friends.ā Carla just announced.
āWhat? Because we both had dead moms who werenāt fully mentally there?ā
Carla smacked her arm. The audacity! āNo, because you are both white, and I need another white girl for leverage.ā
āWOW.ā
āYeah. Figured thatās how sheād pay me back for the long hours I pulled for her.ā Shannon paused, āwait, she pays for your overtime, right?ā You are not taking on more charity projects while being underpaid, right? You crazy woman?
āYes. I am being compensated, fairly, by the agency.ā Carla said, āā¦and some undocumented voluntary times here and there.ā
āCARLA.ā
They needed to talk about whatever guilt complex pushed her towards those disastrous charity work later. Not that Shannon wasnāt grateful for that, herself a disaster.
A year later, she was back in college and had an on-campus job she barely tolerated but guaranteed her affordable housing. Thanks to Carla, and the unspoken spousal benefits of marrying military.
Abby integrated herself into their little friend group, and that was it. The girls v.s the world.
One Sunday afternoon, they commented on anything but Patricia, until Abby confessed that she wanted to leave California, and in the process, leave her boyfriend. That way, should she ask him to sublease, it would be less messy.
Shannon said, āHey, who am I to judge? Iām still married to a man I havenāt seen in two years. A girl gotta do what she gotta do.ā
āYeah, show her the ringless finger!ā Carla indulged. They hurdled together and cheered ābenefits, baby!ā, and it felt so nice to just be mean and carefree with friends. Knowing that theyāve got you, and that they know you. No judgement.
Plus, she barely knew Buck. She only knew him from all the wild stories Abby let slip. She knew he was sweet and eager ā almost too eager ā but Abby was her friend. He could get over some heartbreak if it meant Abby got to be free.
She met met Buck when all of them gathered in Abbyās dining room, sorting through boxes of memory.Ā
(āDocuments, strictly on the table.ā She told her, and Abby chuckled. Buck looked awkwardly between them, trying to decipher the inside joke. Wow, that man truly radiated puppy energy.)
They found the old newspaper highlighting Abbyās Olympics swimmer era. They lamented how wild and free she used to be. Then the thought of Abby leaving became a lot more real and a lot heavier.
Hereās the thing: nothing about Buck reminded her of Eddie. They were not alike, not in the way he paid attention to Abby and knew and treasured every little bit of Abby and learned her likes and dislikes fervently and encouraged her to live her life, even if he was heartbroken. But if that was the only way she would even consider keeping him, he'd do it.
(Droplets of water hit her face when Mom shattered her glass on the wall behind her. āGo on! Go live your life with that lilā punk of yours! See how it goes! You will leave him, I tell you! Just like your dad! Just like you are going to leave me!ā)
Still, Shannon looked at the way he followed her around, and suddenly all she could think of was Eddie, how he must have been alone and hurt and confused and angry (always so angry, not sad), trapped with her in-laws, and Chris.
Oh god. Christopher.
Before she knew it, she dragged Abby to her bedroom and shut the door behind them.
āYou need to tell him.ā She breathed hard, on the verge of hyperventilating. āIf not for him, for yourself, Abby. You gotta, youāve got toā¦ā
Abby stared at her wide-eyed. She looked concerned. But the moment the irregular breathing kicked in, her facial expression neutralized, and she shifted into her first responder gears, āShannon āā
āPlease! Abby, ifā¦ If youāre anything like me, like, like, take it from a runner, itās going to haunt you. It w-will haunt, wi-without..ā
The words failed to come out. Itād been five years since her last anxiety attack. This was all too much, too embarrassing. At some point, she ended up on the floor. Abby and Carla crouched next to her, instructing her to breathe.
She glanced up; Buck hovered at the door, a cup of water in his hands.
The fucking dam broke.Ā
They hugged each other at the security checkpoint. Abby told Buck this was her breaking up with him two days after Shannonās meltdown. Not surprisingly, Buck still stayed to help with the rent.
āWell, you are much more civil than the person I was when my ex-fiance left.ā Abby turned to Buck to hug him again. āBut seriously. You are such a good man, and I wonāt survive it if not for you. Take care, okay?ā
She turned to them: āTake care of our big boy here if he gets too sad? Iām too old and too selfish for him to get all sobby with.ā
āAbby!ā Buck protested, eyes red and puffy. Shannon and Carla looped their hands into each of Buckās arms and held onto him. They joked about getting to keep their golden retriever trophy.Ā
Despite the sentiment, between all their hectic schedules, finding time for all three of them to hang out became increasingly impossible. Shannon found herself spending more alone time with Buck. Carla swore she was not playing matchmaker, but āhubby misses me and wants my time, too.ā
So it was just the two of them, and they went out drinking. A ton. She felt somewhat guilty to admit it, but Shannon felt safe with Buck. Buck didnāt see her as if there were things beyond friendship, and that made everything easier. Plus, it was clear to anyone that he was still hooked on Abby. He lived in the ghost of her apartment, for fuckās sake.
āLook, Iām her friend, but Abby kinda took advantage of you. You know that, right?ā She waved the bartender down for a second round. Buck looked at her gratefully.
They took their shots, and both made a face. Yup, that was Fernet for you.
āWell. Sure, but you didnāt know the past me. You wouldnāt have liked me at all. Then I lost Devon, and Abby saw me, saw through me. Itās justā¦ Abby is the first person who shows she cares, and she sees me, and wants to be there for me. Before her, I was addicted to sex. I slept with anyone I could get my hands on. I even slept with my therapist! And Abby ā¦ā
Horrified, she cut him off. āWait, What?ā
āWhat?ā
āTell me you filed a report or, or, grievance, or somebody filed something?!ā
And Buck just looked stunned.
She asked the bartender to close their tabs this time. āOkay, this has to be a booze-free conversation.ā She grabbed him by his elbow, felt how big his presence was and how gingerly he followed, long legs and small steps, letting her lead. (Is this consensual? Is this touch okay?) Shannon wanted to cry again. It wasnāt fair.
She also wanted to wrap her new best friend, this giant fucking Bambi, in bubble wraps.
here's an idea i got at the city pool today. no idea where it's going
~
"You should let me take you out to dinner," she says, quickly holding up one hand and taking out her phone with the other. Buck takes back most of the step he took away from her in order to view her screen. It's a selfie, that she didn't take because in it she's asleep, turned safe and trusting into the chest of a man smiling like he found a four-leaf clover.
"Huh," he says, eloquently.
"Jerome is adjunct professor." She stows the phone in her tiny bag with a few crisp movements, always so efficient. "He radicalizes community organizers, social workers, and human rights lawyers. On our second date I had to bail him out after getting taken in for a protest."
"Wow, he sounds very..."
"Ethical," she finishes, smiling wickedly. "Don't pretend that's not the word that came to mind. It's okay. Years have gone by since we last ripped each other's clothes off. There's no need to spare my feelings anymore. So, dinner?"
Nothing in her demeanor reminds him of Jade, and her boyfriend, blonde and tan with brown eyes, does not resemble Zane in the slightest, but he can't hold back a wince.
She barks out a laugh, wide-eyed. "Just dinner, I swear. Maybe a few glasses of wine. What kind of life have you been living, Evan Buckley?"
For a little bit in there, he wasn't living at all. "I died," he blurts out, wrong-footed as he forever is with this woman. "For a c-couple minutes. And I fell in love with a man. And- And there was a helicopter chase because of a v-" He clamps his mouth shut. She wrote a book about him and his family. I- I just-"
Her hand, just as diminutive as the bag, covers his forearm. "Relax, big guy. I'm off the 118 beat."
He gulps. "Yeah?"
"Yeah," she says, shoving him a little. "ProPublica doesn't care about one team of firefighters. I take on bastards with white collars now."
"Priests?"
"Rich guys!" Her grin is wide and fond. "God, you have not changed. Seriously, can we break bread together? You and Jerome will be instant besties. He'll have so many facts for you to get all agog and outraged about."
tommy kinard's age: Or, let Buck bounce on that age gap, kids
So. Let's talk about Tommy Kinard's age. Because every time I see him listed as 40 in a current, modern day fic, I lose my mind a little.
Now, obviously , you can do whatever you what in a fic, and I know WHY people do this - some word of god + LFJ's age, with a side helping of That Other Shipper Fandom Doesn't Get to Call Tommy Old if He's Less Than Ten Years Older Than Buck.
However.
Buck is a grown man who canonically dated and changed his life for a woman who was 42 when he was 26 and does not need to be protected from getting his back blown out and his heart claimed by a hot older man.
So, "Tommy Was Born NO Early than 1980 and Is At least 46 in 2026: A Minor Thesis By Me."
First, we know a couple of things about his age from canon:
We know from "Chimney Begins" that Tommy was not a probie in 2005 when Chim joined. So he'd been there at least a year before that. For the sake of making him as young as possible, we will say that he has ONLY been there a year. We also knew that he "learned to fly" in the army.
So, that means:
He had to have joined the LAFD ~2004.
Had to have completed the necessary requirements for army pilots prior to that. For Army pilots joining prior to October 1, 2020, there was a 6 year service requirement after completing flight school.
To be a pilot, Tommy also had to be either a Commissioned Officer OR a Warrant Officer. Assuming he was not an officer, that means he had to complete all of the following before he could becoming a pilot: Army Basic Training, Warrant Officer Candidate School (WOCS), and Army helicopter flight school.
To make Tommy AS YOUNG AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE IN THIS TIMELINE: We'll also assume he joined the army at 17 with parental permission, which you can do because the USA is stupid and because his father seems like the sort - and also because we are going to make Tommy as YOUNG as he can possibly be in 2026 to prove my point:
Age 17: Graduates High school, Enlists in Army and does Basic Combat Training ~ 2.5 months
Age 17: Warrant Officer Candidate School ~1.5 months
Ages: 17ā18 Army helicopter flight school (IERW) ~12 months (Can be up to 18 months, but we are making this the shortest timeline possible)
Ages 18ā24: Aviation service obligation 6 years
Age 24: Leaves Army (Here, we give Tommy a LOT of assumptive grace. Getting into the LAFD Academy is hard, but we'll assume his officers wrote nice things or whatever and he got in right away.)
Age 24 :LAFD Academy: 22 weeks
AGe 24: Starts Probie Year
Age 25: "Chimney Begins" - has been with LAFD for at least a year. (in 2005)
SO, if he's 25 in 2005, that would make him born in 1980. In 2026, that that makes him no younger than 46. If he's born in 1980, that means he is 11 years older than Buck's 1991 birth year, which is fun and sexy if you aren't boring (and they are not.)
Notes:
Now, in truth, in a realistic timeline, Tommy would be older still.
He'd spent closer to 18 months in flight school and he probably had to take some time to apply/wait/join the LAFD academy, and maybe his parents weren't dicks and made him wait to 18 before he signed his life away to the military and/or maybe he gradated at the age of 18.
There's also issues with waiting for admission to WOCs and flight school.
And we have no IDEA how long he was in the LAFD before Chim came along
Honestly, 48 is more realistic and he could easily be celebrating his 50th birthday OR BEYOND. IF YOU AREN'T A COWARD.
BUT~ if you want him as young as possible, 46 is the bottom floor of what can be going on here in 2026. He can definitely be older, but he can't be younger and have the timeline make any sense.
In conclusion:
Sources:
(Just sources; don't join the military, kids.)
Army Aviation Special and Incentive Pay Policies to Promote Performance, Manage Talent, and Sustain Retention
Iām thankfully not a therapist to Tommy Kinard because a) he doesnāt exist b) the dual relationship?! *gasps*
But I will happily submit this pain in the ass quarterly report for my blorbo Tommy Kinard if I am his therapist.
Jokes aside this is nothing compared to what I have to do for most of my homeless clts seeking housing or clts seeking SSIā¦ haha Iām just so burnt out I just want to do fanart and read fanfics all day can I stop using my work brain for one sec š„²
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Hey we found a loophole for Tommy seeking therapy:
Tommy CAN go to therapy as long as itās couple therapy (ideally with Buck bc Iām a bucktommy fan so) w/o having to report to FAA.
(Pulled from Federal Aviation Administration)
(This guideline also indicates if a diagnosis is something like āadjustment dxā theoretically the pilot wonāt be required to be grounded, although such diagnosis still needs to be reported for medical clearance)
(But as an MFT myself I can imagine a good number of us will be willing to be flexible in a couple therapy session to provide individual support should someone need it to avoid risking their career, we get REAL creative with the documentation. Plus, standard of couple therapy practice is the provider get to meet with the attending parties individually before meeting clts conjointly. Sometimes throughout the conjoint sessions individual check-ins still happen, as long as āno secret policyā is still discussed and maintained.)
(THIS does not apply to actively suicidal Tommy. Actively suicidal Tommy requires 5150. Which also means, Tommy with suicidal thoughts but no active intentions or plans technically can get away with this, a lot of private practice therapists may not even document the SIs to protect cltās privacy)
(New legislation in 2024 indicates a pilot with MDD but actively receiving treatment and responding to listed antidepressants may be considered for re-issuance.)
part one // part two // part three // part four // part five // part six // part seven
bucktommy, rating: t, 5.3k, superheroes and villains. buckās making plans. tommyās friends finally get to meet this mysterious boyfriend. athena doesn't get paid enough for this.
"This is getting ridiculous, Tommy. You still won't tell him and we're not allowed to meet him?"
"You'll scare him off or spill the beans. I just wantā"
"To be normal?" Sal finished for him. "Tommy, you left normal behind a long time ago."
"No, I got powers a long time ago, I can still be normal."
Sal snorted, lobbing a foam football at Tommy's head. He caught it and whipped it back, wincing when Sal actually had to take a step back.
"Right," Sal said, rolling his eyes. "Normal guys can do that."
"When I retireā"
"If you really wanted to retire, Tommy, you would have done it years ago. We're not the only superheroes in the world. We're not even the only superheroes in the city," Sal pressed. "You like being a superhero, admit it. And even if you did retire, we'd still be your best friends. We have to meet him sometime. Or do you really expect, six months down the line, that it's not going anywhere?"
"We have powers, Sal. If it goes anywhere, it's just going to end up putting Evan in danger one day."
"So then cut him loose before either of you ends up deeper in this than you already are," Sal said flatly. He watched Tommy tense up and tossed the foam football back at his head. "Introduce us before he thinks you're a friendless loser or Donato stalks him at his job."
"How close is she to doing that?" Tommy rubbed the bridge of his nose.
"Let's just say the kid makes fantastic brownies and leave it at that, shall we?"
"Whatcha working on?"
Buck startled at the question and threw his hands down over the sketch he was working on before he realized it was Athena standing in front of him. Well, that was way better than his boss. Or a customer. Or Tommy.
"Personal project," he told her.
"A project? What kind of project?" Athena asked, leaning across the counter and trying to get a better look at his sketch.
Buck made a face at her and shoved it into his apron pocket before she could yank it out of his hands. "Hopefully something that leads to a new job to replace that old delivery one I quit," he told her, which was as close as he could get to talking about superpowers with Athena in public.
"Sounds interesting. Why don't we get together and you can show me?" Athena offered. Her voice was intentionally light, but he could read the warning in her stance. Buck wasn't going to be allowed to run wild without her permission.
It made sense. He didn't have to like it.
"Hey, Evan's happily dating someone," Tracy interjected, sliding up to the counter and positioning herself at Buck's shoulder. If she was a cat, her fur would be standing straight up.
Buck swallowed a laugh at the thought of Tracy trying to go toe to toe with Athena Grant in a misguided thought that she was ā what, harassing him?
"And I'm happily married. What's your point?" Athena asked, standing up straighter.
"I want you to stop flirting with my staff."
"Stop flā" Athena's mouth snapped shut and she levelled a glare at Buck.
"I told you everyone thinks that," Buck protested. It wasn't his fault that everyone from his boss to the AFO thought that they were flirting. ā¦How could he get people to stop thinking that? Because if he ever ran into one of the AFO out of costume and Athena was there, maybe they'd make the same connection and his identity would get blown out of the water, which would kind of defeat the purpose of faking his own death in the first place.
"Big Sister program." Athena stared flatly over the top of her sunglasses at Tracy.
"He's my Little Brother," Athena continued, when there was no follow up from her.
"Pretty sure you're both too old for that program."
Buck shuffled closer to Tracy, forcing her to take a step back so she and Athena weren't eye to eye anymore. As entertaining as this was, he wasn't excited to actually referee a fight between the two of them.
"I've known Buckaroo a long time."
Tracy narrowed her eyes at Athena, thrusting her latte across the counter. "Thanks for coming today, enjoy your coffee."
"Did I just get banned from your coffee shop?" Athena asked Buck, her lips pressed together.
"Tracy's having a rough week," Buck apologized. "You're fine. Have a cookie, we'll see you next week."
"My place, Thursday. After dinner."
Buck saluted her. "See you then, Sarge."
Bianca frowned at him from the drive-thru window. "Better hope your boyfriend isn't the jealous type."
"We're not doing anything!"
"Tracy thinks Athena was hitting on me at work."
Tommy nearly choked on his beer, and he looked over at Evan in shock. "Tracy ā what? Is sheā¦ does she need glasses?"
"After today I'm starting to think so," Evan hummed, tapping his beer bottle against Tommy's. "You want another?"
"Oh, are you offering me one of my own beers?" Tommy teased him, sitting up a little straighter. "Sal wants to meet you."
Evan perked up. "Your mysterious best friend who I was starting to think didn't exist wants to meet me?" He asked, beaming at Tommy. "I want to meet him too."
"Gina and Lucy want to come too," Tommy warned him, pressing his lips together. He tried to smile when he realized he was frowning, but based on the expression on Evan's face he hadn't quite pulled it off. "You don't have to."
"When have you ever known me to do anything I didn't want to?" Evan asked softly, putting his beer down and swinging a leg over Tommy's, settling down in his lap. "Unless there's a reason you don't want me to meet your friends."
"Well," Tommy said, considering the question. There were lots of reasons he didn't want Sal and company to meet Evan. Evan's face fell and he sat back on his heels, hiding a frown behind his beer. Tommy startled, shaking his head and grabbing for Evan's hand. "They're assholes and I don't want them to scare you off," Tommy hurried to reassure him. "It has nothing to do with you."
Evan grinned at Tommy, his eyes sparkling like he'd just cracked the funniest joke Evan had ever heard. "Takes more than a few pointed questions to scare me off," he promised, ducking down to kiss Tommy briefly. "I'm off on Tuesday and Wednesday this week, if you four can get the time off for dinner."
"Fingers crossed," Tommy agreed. Maybe he could lean on the San Diego heroes to cover for a night, just in case someone decided to try something. Because Evan had been plenty understanding of cancelled dates so far, but having to reschedule the first 'meet the family' date probably wouldn't play as well.
"But hey, you're firefighters, I understand if something goes late and we have to cancel. Just do your best to let me know as early as you can."
"I'd hate to leave you on your own," Tommy murmured, tipping his head back and leaning up for another kiss.
"Mm, I'll keep myself entertained somehow," Evan assured him, grinning into the kiss. "I know where your spare key is and I'm really good at taking pictures."
Tommy groaned, a shudder running through him at the thought of Evan taking photos of himself in Tommy's bed and sending them to Tommy. "Can we skip the awkward dinner with my best friend and go straight to that plan?"
"No!" Evan exclaimed, laughing. "I've been waiting for this for a while, we're going out together. We can do that some other time."
"Look, I'm just sayingā" Buck pushed himself up using Tommy's thigh, gesturing with his beer bottle. "Maybe the guy deserved it."
Tommy lifted the bottle out of his hands before it could spill. "Next thing you know you'll be waxing poetic about the death penalty," he said wryly.
"I just think," Buck said seriously, holding up a finger. He met Lucy's gaze, flushing a little when she grinned at him. "That the guy had already tried to kill the AFO on multiple occasions. Crosswind in particular, and if Kestrel did kill himā"
"If?" Sal asked, arching an eyebrow.
"Like the cops have never accidentally killed someone and then blamed it on someone else," Buck pronounced, glancing around. "You're a lawyer, right Gina? So, anyway, if Kestrel did it, then it was just in the interest of public safety. It's not like villains have the best interests of civilians in mind when they're out criming."
Criming, Tommy mouthed to himself.
"Do you always get philosophical when you drink?" Lucy wondered.
"Only when it's just me and my boyfriend's friends and I'm nervous about making a good impression." Buck froze. "Uh. Can we pretend I didn't say that?"
"Nope. We're gonna use that against ya for the rest of your life," Sal winked at him. "Cause that's how long Tommy wants to keep you around for."
"As long as you're teasing both of us," Buck hummed, tilting his head back to grin up at Tommy.
"If he's bothering you, let me know. I'll take him out back and rough him up," Tommy murmured in his ear, making Buck shiver.
Buck laughed, shaking his head. "I like your friends."
"This one's a keeper, Kinard," Gina chimed in.
"What are you three doing?" Tommy asked, coming to a stop when he walked in on them crowded around the whiteboard. He hadn't been able to stop them from keeping score about whether or not he was going to tell Evan about his job, but he'd really been hoping that they would get bored of it after a week.
They'd been keeping score two months.
"Trying to figure out how many points to give your boy for that speech he made last night about why Kestrel is so cool and probably didn't commit murder, not to mention just how dreamy Kestrel is," Lucy said, gnawing on the end of her marker. "Gina?"
"It probably would have created enough doubt on a jury to hang them," Gina mused, tapping a finger against her lips. "Would have saved you twenty five to life, at least for a while, soā¦"
"We are absolutely not giving him twenty five points," Sal interjected.
"Even if they go towards the side that says Tommy should tell him?" Lucy asked.
"It's been months. It's not like you've got any other secrets that'll take the edge off of keeping this one," Sal continued, narrowing his eyes at Tommy. "Unless you've got a secret marriage even I don't know about."
Tommy narrowed his eyes at Sal. "Why is that the first example that you came up with?"
"I dunno, Tommy, probably because if you could get away with it none of us would know anything about your life in the first place. You should work on that."
"What's this?" Athena asked, picking Buck's suit up between her fingers and squinting at him.
"It's a suit," Buck said, fighting the urge to snatch it back out of her grasp. "You can at least look like you're not holding rancid garbage."
"I thought we talked about the fact that you can't just pop up with a new name and the same powers without everyone catching on to the fact that you might be the villain that died rather dramatically a few months ago," Athena told him, her voice softening. She looked at the suit again, pulling at one of the seams. "Who made this?"
"I did. With some spare fabric I bought from Gerrard's guy. āWhat? I knew at some point I wouldn't have access to his supplies so I planned to have some of my own."
"Always thinking ahead, aren't you Buck?"
"With the exception of signing that contract in the first place, sure," Buck scratched at the back of his neck, shrugging. He'd always wonder what would have happened if he'd showed up in Los Angeles as a regular powered person and run into the AFO, but there were some perks to the way everything had ended up shaking out. Like Tommy.
Athena smiled at him, her eyes twinkling. "Everyone's allowed to make a few mistakes when they're in their twenties, kid. I'm sorry you can't use the suit, though."
"No, that's the best part!" Buck said enthusiastically. "My powers are heat based. Fire is the easiest thing to make, butā" he glanced around the empty house, waving Athena into the backyard. "Stay by the door, just in case," Buck said, rubbing his hands together. "Do you know what else is really hot, Athena?"
"You better not be about to create lava here, Buckley. We just landscaped two years ago." Athena glanced back into the house, hesitating on the threshold.
"Relax, it's not that hot." Buck rubbed his hands together, grinning widely at her. "Have I ever put you in danger before?"
"I seem to remember getting kidnapped more than once."
"Hey, I told you right away that it wasn't a real kidnapping!"
"You tied me up, Buck."
"Are we re-litigating our entire relationship or do you want to see what I can do?"
Athena rolled her eyes, knocking a fist against the doorframe. "Show me what you got, Matches."
Buck blew into his hands and held them out to his sides. "Let there be light," he said, snapping his fingers.
Lightning crackled between his hands and Athena jumped, her jaw dropping. "Buck! Be careful!"
"It's okay," Buck said, clapping his hands together. The lightning sparked and dissipated, vanishing against his skin. "I'm pretty good with the control."
"I'd prefer it if you said that you had perfect control," Athena drawled, taking a cautious step out into the backyard and relaxing when she didn't get shocked. "And are you gonna electrocute everyone you run into as a hero, orā¦?"
"Pfft. I know how to aim around people. I never hit Kestrel, did I?"
"Do you really want me to answer that?" Athena asked, crossing her arms over her chest.
Buck grimaced, conceding the point. She'd been around for all of their early interactions, and as much as Buck had always admired Kestrel, he hadn't wanted to go easy on him for a variety of reasons. He'd never set out to hurt him, bu he'd also never pulled a punch if Kestrel had moved into his line of fire.
"Okay, well, I never hit him with intent."
"Kestrel's also indestructible and lightning is ten times hotter than fire."
"Why are you trying to shoot this down before I even get a chance to try it out?" Buck asked, throwing his hands up in frustration. "Athena, I want to do something good with this. I found out about my powers and then I met Gerrard and ā I want to be more than a screwup. If people even still think about Firestarter, I'm just a bad guy who had some bad luck. I can help. You don't even have to do anything! Just let the AFO know I'm a friendly."
"I'll think about it," Athena promised, taking another step into the backyard. "You know that even if you don't go back to being a super in public, you're not a screwup. Don't you?"
"Yeah. Obviously." Buck shrugged off the look she was giving him, heading back inside and holding up the suit again. "So, you never said. Do you think this looks good on me?"
"Are you sure you don't want one of those boob windows?" Athena asked dryly, immediately making a face when Buck lit up. "No, don't do that." She tilted her head, giving the suit a more thorough look. "Well, you have a design and Firestarter was just shades of red, so that's good. And everyone has a mask, soā¦ as long as yours covers your birthmark, we can call that a good deal. I'd prefer that it cover your hair again, butā¦"
"Right, we don't want anyone lusting over me when I'm taken."
She rolled her eyes, flicking a finger in his direction. "On that note. Since you flirted with Kestrel so much as Firestarter, you might not want to do that this time around."
"But no one else does. Athena, it should be a crime that Kestrel doesn't get flirted with by every eligible bachelor and bachelorette in the city. You know ā you know, you should really start arresting people for that," Buck said, warming up to the subject. "I mean, does anyone flirt with him in his non-mask life? Do you know?"
"I think his boyfriend takes care of that, Buck," Athena sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Speaking of boyfriends, just what are you going to tell Tommy if you start running around in spandex?"
"I hadn't gotten that far yet, actually. I wanted to make sure you'd be on my side if I went out first."
Athena sighed, shaking her head once. "Put all of that away before Bobby gets home. Do you want anything to drink?"
"I wouldn't say no to a sandwich, actually. Using the powers tends to make me hungry," Buck told her, shoving the suit back into his backpack and zipping it up. "I think it's because heat burns calories."
Athena paused, looking at Buck over her shoulder. "ā¦Just how much did you eat as Firestarter?"
Buck scratched his chin, considering. "I mean, I didn't really keep track, but I guess I kept up with professional athletes? The employee discount at the coffee shop comes in pretty handy. And then when I stopped being Firestarter, I just sort of stopped eating so much."
"And Tommy never noticed you were packing away that much food?" Athena asked, amused.
"Well, we only started dating like a week before Firestarter died, and we weren't really spending a lot of our time together eating." Buck leered playfully, ducking behind the island when Athena launched an oven mitt at his head. "No, I made sure that I ate before I saw him so any meals were a normal size. Not really a safe way to explain why I ate like a linebacker, huh?"
He paused, sitting down on a stool and scratching his fingernail lightly against the counter. "Let's hope I don't go broke on a barista's salary while I'm superheroing. Does the AFO have a food budget?"
"I haven't even said that I'm going to talk to them about you."
Buck dropped his chin in his hands, beaming at Athena when she put a roast beef sandwich down in front of him. "No, you haven't," he agreed cheerfully, taking a bite. "But you're going to."
"Really? Why am I going to do that?"
"Because you like me. We're friends."
Athena froze. "Oh my god, we are."
"Could be worse," Buck consoled her, amused. "We could liā"
"Don't you say it, Buckley."
"āve together," Buck finished as Bobby walked into the house. "Heya, Cap."
Bobby made a show of looking around the living room before kissing Athena's cheek. "Did I miss a memo about hosting?"
"Nah, I just came over to ask Athena if she could be a reference for a new job I'm hoping to get." Buck wrapped the second half of the sandwich in a paper towel and shoved the last bite of the first half into his mouth, saluting Bobby. "I'll let you get back to hanging out, because if you're off that means Tommy is too."
"Nice seeing you," Bobby offered, smiling bemusedly when Buck scooped up his backpack. "Does Tommy's boyfriend often stop by while we're on shift?" Buck heard him ask Athena.
"Hey, Buck was my barista before he was Tommy's boyfriend."
"That doesn't really answer my question, Athena."
"I can make coffee or I can take out the trash, and we had a rush!" Buck called over his shoulder, muscling the back door open as Bianca kept grumbling at him. "Oh, hey, you can't be back here," he said, catching sight of someone lighting a cigarette in the shadows of the alley. "This is private property. You can smoke around the front."
"I could, but I couldn't talk to you out there," they said, and Buck froze. They blew out a cloud of smoke and met his gaze, and their eyes shimmered as they smiled at him.
"ā¦You know I hate it when you sneak up on me, N," Buck said faintly, taking a step back. He'd never seen this face before. "How did you find me? Does heā¦"
"You've been serving me coffee since you started working here," Nullity said, taking a step towards him. "He doesn't know anything. Your friends burned my contract and I haven't talked to him since."
"Right, but how did you know thatā" Buck gestured at his face.
"I can change the molecules of my body at will. Things like masks don't really stop me from seeing what's underneath them," Nullity offered, drifting closer. They paused in front of Buck, their expression shifting to a face that he absolutely recognized, given that they'd worn it every time they'd met up with Firestarter.
"Heya, Nat," Buck offered cheekily, and Nullity scowled at him before blowing smoke directly in his face.
"I do not look like Black Widow," Nullity grumbled.
"Yeah, you do." Buck said, laughing. "It's a good look, though."
"I wanted to let you know that I'm leaving town," Nullity continued, ignoring Buck's comments. They flicked the butt of their cigarette, ash drifting to the ground. "I won't be around to help if you run into trouble from now on."
"I think I can handle myself," Buck said, torn between being pleased that Nullity had been worried about him and offended that they thought he couldn't take care of himself.
"You're too nice," Nullity said, leaning in. "You don't hit first, hmm? So if someone hits harder, then you might have a problem."
"I went toe to toe with Kestrel on multiple occasions," Buck hissed.
"Neither one of you was trying your hardest," Nullity snorted, taking a step back. They stubbed their cigarette out on the wall and tucked it behind their ear, their face morphing back into the same man Buck had first seen in the alley.
"Do I get a number?" Buck asked, shaking his head. "You know, since you're so worried about me."
Nullity grinned, their teeth sharpening. "No point," they hummed. "You get into trouble loudly. I'm sure I can find my way back here in time."
Buck wasn't sure if it was just getting darker out or if Nullity was doing something to the light in the alley, but by the time they'd finished speaking they had completely disappeared from view.
"Get into trouble loudly," Buck grumbled, throwing the garbage bag into the dumpster and waiting for the clang when it hit the bottom. "And what do you call what you used to do, huh?" He wondered, just in case Null was hanging around out of sight. "Geez."
"We should go out," Buck declared, stopping in the doorway to Tommy's living room.
"I could have sworn we were going out," Tommy replied dryly, looking Buck up and down so intently he felt like he was going to combust. "Or do the kids call it something different these days?"
"The kidsā stop trying to pretend you're old. And stop trying to change the subject."
"Trying to change the subject? I didn't even say anything."
"You'reā" Buck gestured at him. "Looking at me."
"My mother raised me to always look at the person who was talking to me," Tommy teased him, smiling lazily.
"I ā okay, I want to hear about this mother later ā am serious, Tommy. When was the last time we actually went out? And the introduction to Sal and Gina and Lucy doesn't count. If there are more than two people, it's not a date."
"I believe both polyamorous and people who like going on double dates would disagree with you."
Buck tried to hold on to the grumpiness he was feeling but had to laugh at that one. "Tommy, stop being soā¦"
"Pedantic?"
"Pedicktic, maybe," Buck joked back, flopping onto the couch besides Tommy. "Anyway. My point is that we should, you know, do something that isn't just takeout and sex on the couch."
"If you want to have sex against the wall, all you have to do is ask."
Tommy was laughing silently before Buck reached out and smacked his chest. Tommy caught his hand and kissed his knuckles, the crow's feet at the corners of his eyes deepening.
"Okay, sorry, I couldn't resist."
"Yeah, that's our problem! You look like that and expect me to share you with the rest of the world?" Buck asked, shivering at the gentle touch.
"And you look like that and expect me to share you with the world?" Tommy volleyed back, shaking his head mock sadly. "It's just a tragedy."
"Right now?" Tommy countered, arching an eyebrow at him.
"ā¦Maybe tomorrow," Buck decided, squeezing Tommy's hand and smirking at him. "Those are the kind of clothes I want to get you out of, not the kind I want to take you out in."
"On the couch?" Tommy asked, mock offended. "I thought you were tired of that."
"Ha, ha," Buck deadpanned, standing up. "The bedroom is fine."
"Be honest. Did you look up hot date spots in Los Angeles?" Buck asked, leaning across the table and dropping his voice. "This doesn't exactly strike me as your speed?"
Tommy glanced around, gesturing to his left. "A guy can't like a nice rooftop terrace?"
Buck looked in that direction, sighing when the table full of finance bros beside them leered at their waitress. "Well, some guys can't," he said ruefully. If he was out on his own he'd direct a little heat at their feet, get them jumping around. It'd distract them from the waitress and hopefully get them kicked out, but he was with Tommy. He didn't want to risk Tommy noticing anything, because then it might get back to Athena that he was still using his powers, and then she'd probably (rightfully) walk back the reluctant offer to talk to the AFO about him.
Tommy stared too, a furrow between his eyebrows. Buck wanted to reach out and smooth his fingers down through it until Tommy stopped frowning.
"Some people shouldn't be allowed out in public until they've taken a Miss Manners course," Tommy said dryly, hooking his ankle around Buck's under the table.
"I mean, right now I'm having an idea that would get me thrown in one of those classes," Buck offered, reaching out and catching Tommy's hand in his. "But I'm being very responsible and refraining." From the urge to drag Firestarter out of retirement and the urge to drag Tommy into the bathroom. Could Buck give himself a gold star? He deserved one.
Tommy grinned back at him, rubbing his thumb over the back of Buck's hand. "You're so hot when you're being responsible."
"I want you to know that you're tempting me right now," Buck told him. "It's actually kind of superhuman, how much I'm resisting you right now."
"I'll find you one of those domino masks," Tommy joked.
Buck laughed, ready to tease him some more, and the door to the terrace exploded in a blast of light. "Ladies and gentlemen! If everyone would kindly make their way to the far side of the roof, I'm here to liberate you from your valuables."
No way. Buck groaned, exchanging a tired stare with Tommy. "I regret saying we needed to spend more time in public," Buck whispered.
He'd never worried about getting held hostage when he was working for Gerrard; he'd known when everything was happening and he'd had the ability to sneak away. Now he was justā¦ Evan Buckley. And Tommy was here. How was Buck supposed to protect him if he couldn't use his powers?
"Come on," Buck whispered, using the grip he already had on Tommy's hand to drag him along with the rest of the group. "I'm sure someone will show up soon. Or we'll be out a few bucks and he'll leave."
The guy looked like an evil Egon, plasma gun strapped to his back and Buck knew if he could get a little distance, he could make that sucker explode and keep him incapacitated until the cops showed up.
But he wasn't on his own and he couldn't do anything that would put Tommy in danger.
The finance bros jostled Buck, and the grip he had on Tommy's hand slipped. "Tommyā" Buck twisted, trying to find him. There! He could see the top of Tommy's head, and ā oh no. That was the edge of the roof, that was the crowd panicking, that was Tommy going overā Buck pushed through the crowd, hoping that the roiling mass of people was big enough to cover him moving in the opposite direction, and he rolled over the edge of the roof, fire igniting under his feet. He let himself fall and spun around, looking frantically. Tommy couldn't have fallen all the way, yet, he still had time to grab him and thenā there. A person in midair.
"Tommy?" Buck sputtered to a stop in front of Kestrel, who was halfway between the date outfit Tommy had been wearing and the uniform Kestrel always wore.
"Evan?" Tommy's jaw dropped and he glanced down, taking in the fire. "ā¦Firestarter?"
"Oh my god. I'm gonna be so weird about this later," Buck promised, his hands itching to touch. He reached out and then shook his head, pulling away. "No, we have to deal with him first."
"I have to deal with him," Tommy said firmly. "You're dead. And a villain. And you don't have a mask."
"I've got a few tricks up my sleeve." Buck snapped his fingers and the fire crackled, growing larger and changing until it was lightning dancing across his skin. He pulled a piece loose and pressed it over his eyes, throwing finger guns at Tommy. "First one up there is a rotten egg," he teased. His lightning let off a sonic boom as he took off, and it was enough to have everyone on the roof looking in his direction when he rose above it.
"Hey, Moodbuster," Buck called, lightning flashing between his fingers. "What happens to a robber who gets struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else," he finished cheerfully, launching a bolt at the guy's feet.
He yelped and dodged away just in time for Tommy to come arrowing in, grabbing him off the roof.
"Party pooper!" Buck called after Tommy, waving at the crowd. "If I know anything about that guy, the cops are going to be here any second to take statements and then you can all get back to your dinner," he saluted the crowd and took off around the corner of the building, looping back to one of the empty corners and landing. He dismissed the lightning with a wave, rejoining the other diners and making his way back to his table. Tommy would be able to explain his absence much more easily if they weren't both gone.
It had been chaotic enough that they might go unnoticed, but Buck wasn't about to risk it.
He was working his way through Tommy's wine and his appetizer by the time Tommy came back, Athena hot on his heels. "I hear we had some excitement up here," she said, flipping her notebook open. "Now, I don't suppose either of you can tell me exactly when the robber came onto the terrace?"
Buck crunched down on Tommy's last spring roll, raising an eyebrow at her. "You got some 'splaining to do, Lucy."
give me 10 year old Theo being so well-adjusted, half the kids in his class hate him because heās not interested in acting out, while the other half of them think heās the coolest. (and letās be honest, the half that say they hate him are jealous of the fact that his dads are firefighters, because what do you mean the one who isnāt biologically his father flies helicopters?!)
those same kids being jealous through most of middle school, but some start to pull their heads out of their asses as they get older (maybe Tommy attends a career day or two, explains that flying takes a lot of training and practice, but Theo has been playing on a simulator since he was in single digits and even though Evan wonāt let him near a cockpit if Tommyās not flying the birdāno Theo, you canāt practice with your father, youāre not old enough to even drive, youāre not manning a flying objectāand will probably fly before he drives). Slowly but surely, the Buckley-Kinard home becomes the Coolā¢ house. Itās not long before the entire basement becomes Theoās space to host friendsāand finding a basement in California was a fucking process, but they managed.
Heās in his first year of high school when Jason, a kid who has hated him for as long as he could remember, asks if he can join on one of those weekend hangs. Theo is confused and Evan and Tommy are a little concerned, but they decide to give it a shot. And it takes some timeāTheo and Jason do have a few mutual friendsābut slowly, Jason comes out of his shell. After a few months, Jason asks if he can come over for the weekend. Itās a four day break and half the students are headed out of town. Evan and Tommy donāt really have any plans beyond the fact that Evan took several days off and Tommyāwho has retired from the LAFD at this pointāalso didnāt take any flight training appointments. They figured theyād feel the weekend out in terms of plans. Still, when Jason asks, they say sure. Why not. They know how teenage boys are, and try not to ask too many questions.
Friday night comes and goes. Saturday includes a trip out of the city. They take the boys to Runyon Canyon and hike for a while before getting all the junk and snacks on their way home as a treat. After dinner and showers, the boys head to the basement while Evan and Tommy curl up in their bed. Tommy has a movie marathon plannedāassuming Evan doesnāt fall asleep ten minutes into Rush Hour 2.
Itās Tommy who wakes up at 230 in the morning when Theo knocks on the door. Evan is half across his chest, drooling a patch into Tommyās olive Carhartt t-shirt, but he grumbles awake when Tommy sits up.
āI feel like a dick,ā Theo whispers to Tommy in the dark. When Tommy gives him the expression telling him to continue, Theo shakes his head. Heās quiet for a moment.
āWe were playing MLH Hockey for a while. He started to get tired so I said we should lay down, and he asked if we could watch this old movie. Something from the 2010s.ā
Tommy tries not to cringe at the suggestion of the decade that made up his twenties and thirties being old, but he doesnāt stop Theo. Weary as he may be, Evan listens as well, although his eyes are closed, trusting his husband to handle this one.
āI donāt know,ā Theo murmurs. āOne minute we were laughing, and the next, he was asking about my mom and dad. Saying he doesnāt understand how Iā¦keep it together? I guess. And I mean, weāve known each other since second grade. Heās heard me talk about how we did therapy as a family, and also by myself. How you and dad have talked about taking care of your mental health so that you could do more than justā¦I donāt know, go to work and not have that be all your life was?ā
Tommy lets out a long breath, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
āSomething like that. We both had our demons, individually. And your dad taught a great amount of peopleāincluding meāthat talking to someone about the heavy stuff was easier than just continuing to stuff it down,ā Tommy responds. āHe wasnāt being mean, was he?ā
Theo shakes his head.
āHe just h-had all of these questions. Sometimes I was wondering if he actually believed me.ā Theo pauses for a few moments, and Tommy watches him, waiting. āDid you know heās never had anyone over at his house?ā
Tommy shakes his head. Then again, Jason has only been in their house for the past three-ish months, so itās not unheard of for him and Evan to not know that.
āI thought maybe he was gonna say he wasnāt allowed, or that heās not embarrassed to be seen with his family or something.ā
āHeās not?ā Tommy asks.
Theo sniffs, staring at the floor.
āHis mom died when he was seven,ā he rasps. āA-and itās just been him and his dad all these years. His dad has never been to any of our games, andā¦ he said tonight, itās because his dad was always working. His mom got really sick before she died, and-..ā
āMedical expenses,ā Tommy murmurs. Theo nods. He gulps.
āI thought maybe he was going to ask about my mom.ā Theo sighs, wiping at his face. He looks up at Tommy. āThey live in this tiny apartment. He showed me some pictures and videos on his phone. I asked if his dad is still trying to pay off all the debt from his momās death, and he said no. So I asked why they havenāt moved somewhere bigger, because I thought maybe he was trying to say he wanted his house to be the place everyone hangs.ā
Tommy keeps listening. Heās not sure whether that thought is actually important to Theo, and heās also fairly sure itās not the direction the conversation is going. Theo shakes his head, sniffs.
āHeā¦he said his dad-ā¦heās sick now, too. I guess he found out last year, and itās not looking good. Heās been trying to get Jason set up at least little bit, because they donāt really have family, but theyāre stretched and-..ā
Theo sobs before he can stop himself, and thatās all it takes before Evan and Tommy are both pulling him in.
āAnd I have a home, and four parents who have loved me, and Kameron and Connors estate in a trust, and I-ā¦ā
āTrauma doesnāt disappear, so much as we learn to accommodate it,ā Evan tells him softly.
āI know,ā Theo answers. āItās not that, though. Itāsā¦ he started coming over I guess because he wanted to be able to say my life is an act, that were not really like this.ā
Evan and Tommy both watch Theo, each with a hand on his face, watching him closely.
āAnd then he stayed that first weekend, and you guys did that big breakfast on Saturday morning, a-andā¦ā
āHe got to see what a family looks like,ā Tommy surmises. It took him a long time to settle into that even after heād fully moved in with Evan and Theo, nearly a decade ago.
Theo sniffles again and nods. He looks up at Tommy.
āHe said you told him a few weeks ago about your mom, and heās been trying to figure out how to tell someone th-that theyā¦they put his dad in hospice.ā
Evan inhales deeply.
āI guess school has been trying to talk to him, threatening to call social services because his dad isnāt returning calls. And I know itās stupid, but it made me feel selfish for all that I have, and how much you guys have done for me since I was a little kid-..ā
āIāve loved you since the day you were born,ā Evan reminds him. āHell, even before that.ā
āAnd you have been mine since the day we met,ā Tommy adds. āWe havenāt done anything more than any decent parent would. And thatās not saying Jasonās dad isnāt decent.ā
āSounds like he has a lot on his plate,ā Evan says with a nod. He looks over at Tommy as the pilot looks back at him. They both sigh.
āLook, obviously this is all going to be a much longer conversation,ā Tommy tells Theo.
āBut you donāt need to carry it,ā Evan adds. āWeāll find a way to help. Ok?ā
Theo nods, although he doesnāt move off the edge of the bed. After a moment, Tommy quirks an eyebrow.
āLook, I know youāre older and all, but youāre notā¦ I mean youāre always welcome to squeeze in between-..ā
āWhat!? No, dad. Yuck,ā Theo exclaims as soft as he can while also being dramatic. āIāll sleep in my own bed. I justā¦I could use another hug.ā
Tommy and Evan both go soft at that, pulling Theo in and squeezing him as tight as they can. They feel the way the worry melts off of him, and when his limbs go loose, they finally let up. Theo stands a few seconds later, standing at the side of the bed for a spell longer.
āThanks,ā he murmurs, wiping his face one more time. āFor making this place the way it is, and not just for me.ā
Tommy reaches out and squeezes his hand as Evan nods at him again.
āAlways, kid.ā
Theo pulls his hand away a few seconds later, murmuring a soft good night before he heads back out of the room.
He swings by the kitchen on his way back toward the basement, grabbing a few Oreos and some milk. He eats them quietly, and when he returns tp the basement, Jason is passed out, snoring softly on the guest trundle bed that usually gets tucked under Theoās during the week.
Theo crawls back into his blankets and pulls them up, turning to glance over at his nightstand. Thereās a double, hinged frame there. One holds a picture of him with his dads from last hockey season. Heās on the ice in full gear while Evan and Tommy are outside of the rink on either side of him. His team had just taken second in a district championship.
The picture next to it is much older, but just as important. Heās maybe three in it. Kameron and Connor are at a park with him, laughing on a blanket. Itās a purely candid shot and all of their eyes are on each other, but when Theo thinks back on the few memories he has of his life with them, they always feel the same way that picture feels. He reaches over a brushes a finger against the edge of his momās head before they slide down, resting over Connorās chest. His eyes drift to Jason. They have so much in common, and yet so little, and here they are.
His eyes drift down to the piece of paper tucked into the bottom of frame where the picture of Kameron and Connor is.
How lucky am I to have had something that makes saying goodbye so hard.
When he closes his eyes, he can envision them. He thinks they would be proud. He hopes they would. He always knows when his dads are. And sure, maybe heās seen a lot of tragedy in his young life. But heās also been able to talk about it. Thatās more than a lot of other people can say.
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I did not want to give a shit about this arc, but Malcolm-Jamal Warner was so goddamn good in it that I was forced to. He was an excellent actor and taken far too soon. RIP.
Iām watching that documentary āBefore Stonewallā about gay history pre-1969, and uncovered something which I think is interesting.
The documentary includes a brief clip of a 1954 televised newscast about the rise of homosexuality. The host of the program interviewed psychologists, a police officer, and one āknown homosexualā. The āknown homosexualā is 22 years old. He identifies himself as Curtis White, which is a pseudonym; his name is actually Dale Olson.
So I tracked down the newscast. According to what I can find, Dale Olson may have been the first gay man to appear openly on television and defend his sexual orientation. He explains that thereās nothing wrong with him mentally and heās never been arrested. When asked whether heād take a cure if it existed, he says no. When asked whether his family knows heās gay, he says that they didnāt up until tonight, but he guesses theyāre going to find out, and heāll probably be fired from his job as well. So of course the host is like ā¦why are you doing this interview then? and Dale Olson, cool as cucumber pie, says āI think that this way I can be a little useful to someone besides myself.ā
1954. 22 years old. Balls of pure titanium.
Despite the pseudonym, Daleās boss did indeed recognize him from the TV program, and he was promptly fired the next day. He wrote into ONE magazine six months later to reassure readers that he had gotten a new job at a higher salary.
Curious about what became of him, I looked into his life a little further. It turns out that he ultimately became a very successful publicity agent. He promoted the Rocky movies and Superman. Not only that, but get this: Dale represented Rock Hudson, and he was the person who convinced him to disclose that he had AIDS! He wrote the statement Rock read. And as we know, Rock Hudsonās disclosure had a very significant effect on the national conversation about AIDS in the U.S.
It appears that no one has made the connection between Dale Olson the publicity agent instrumental in the AIDS debate and Dale Olson the 22-year-old first openly gay man on TV. So I thought Iād make it. For Pride month, an unsung gay hero.
for the fic title game: āand time just stops tickingā
Oh, you know I'm doing some weird magical bullshit with this one.Ā Now usually I stick Tommy in the torment nexus (if not meant to go in the torment nexus why torment nexus shaped?), but let's give Buck a go around this time.
There is only so much weight Los Angeles can hold (only so many catastrophes and emergencies and death) and when another one occurs, time fractures and Buck fractures along with it.
He is living in Buck Actually and Buck Begins and Buck Bothered and Bewildered and Mother's Boy and he is pulling people (and bodies) out of the rubble.Ā He's living it for the first time and then again ("I'm not supposed to be here," he tells Bonnie.Ā "He's waiting for me.").Ā He is sitting with Mitchell and Tommy is kissing him in the loft kitchen and he is trying to lift the tank off Saleh and he is writhing on the floor and begging it to stop please stop. And then it's always the same: he goes home, alone.
And then there's hands on him and he's being pulled up and out and he's back where he's supposed to be.Ā "What happened?" Chimney asks as Hen shines a light in his eyes.Ā "You went catatonic."
"I'm fine," Buck says, and he is.Ā All of that already happened.Ā He made it out.Ā He's going home, alone.
It's dawn by the time they're relieved, and then it's even later when he leaves the 118 (arguing that he doesn't need to go to the hospital he's fine), and it's nearly noon when Tommy, exhaustion dogging his heels, walks out of Harbor to see Buck leaning against his truck.
"Do you want to come home with me?" Buck asks.Ā "We can talk."
"I'd like that," Tommy said, and he holds out a hand for Buck to take, and they go home.
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Does anyone know if Tevan Territory (or any Bucktommy discord server ppl interact with daily) is still active and if so may I ask for an invite š„ŗš„ŗš„ŗ
how manual wheelchair users move (explainer for non-users)
frequently when iām out and about with someone walking, they canāt anticipate what path i will take and therefore theyāre in my way pretty frequently. this is fine! i can politely ask them to step to the side. but it makes me think about how little non-wheelchair users understand the way wheelchair users move. as someone who used to walk everywhere, it was an adjustment period for me to figure out how to navigate the world in a chair. here are some things that didnāt occur to me so that you donāt cut off your friend right as theyāre building momentum to go up a ramp š
for context, i use an active manual chair. the world is very different in a power chair. even among active manual chair users, there is a huge diversity in physicality and strategies for getting around. this is a general guide that i think will apply to most manual wheelchair users. iām starting super basic and getting more complicated as i go.
āāā
1. manual wheelchairs are a momentum game. it is very easy to maintain speed and direction. but speeding up, slowing down, or turning, is hard. one thing this affects is if weāre on a wavy sidewalk or other twisty-turny walkway, that is a pain in the ass and i am taking as straight a path as i can.
2. wheelchair users also have to pay attention to the slope and condition of the pavement, so our path somewhere will be different than yours, even if weāre taking the same route to the same place. for example, i usually have to go down slopes straight, not diagonally, to avoid tipping over sideways. one area this affects is crosswalks. many intersections have one curb cut for both roads you could cross, which means i will go down curb cuts to a crosswalk as if i am aiming for the middle of the intersection.
your path in orange, mine in blue. to you it seems indirect, but to me itās the path of least resistance.
i also will be building speed in the second half of the crosswalk. this is a much easier way to tackle a ramp. if i approach with momentum, i wonāt have to drag myself up the slope once i get to it.
3. building momentum and maintaining it is only half of the job. the other half is stopping. manual wheelchairs cannot stop on a dime if theyāre moving with any kind of speed. if i tried to stop immediately when going downhill, i would fly out of the chair. so donāt walk right into the path of a wheelchair in motion and then stop! i will have to turn to the side very quickly and hope i donāt tip. i canāt tell you how often parents pushing strollers will stop their stroller directly in my path and then get offended when i am alarmed and turn sharply to avoid hitting their child. from their perspective, i was being careless and going ātoo fast.ā in reality, normal walking speed takes a few feet to slow down from and stop.
4. in terms of slope. see this street in san francisco?
i canāt go down this street, itās way too steep. i would give myself friction burns on my palms trying to control my speed. if i was in a situation where there was no avoiding this street, like in an emergency, i would be breaking my straight-slope rule and zig-zagging in the middle of the road.
this would require several zig-zags back and forth, more than the four that i drew. i also could not go up this road other than with this method. up or down, i risk tipping over sideways if iām not careful.
4. in a similar vein, consider terrain. slopes with grass or carpet take huge amounts of energy to get up. this grassy hill isnāt insurmountable, but it would take me like thirty minutes to get up there. honestly i would probably go backwards, because itās easier to pull yourself up a slope than push yourself.
other types of terrain can be completely immobilizing, though. this decorative gravel pathway is beautiful, and inaccessible to me. my casters (front wheels) simply will not go through that.
5. in terms of walkways and obstacles. if thereās a deep gap in the pavement lined up the way iām going, and itās, say, an inch wide, that is an obstacle for me. my casters are one inch wide, and my back wheels are an inch and a half. iāll get stuck in it like a train on a track.
i have to straddle this, even if it means being too close to the middle of the sidewalk and preventing us from walking side by side.
similarly, if a crack is greater than an inch high, iām gonna wheelie over it. at two inches, i have to. a wheelie may require a change in speed, either faster or slower depending on the person.
i have 4 inch casters, so a lip as little as 2 inches will stop me in my tracks. a lip as little as one inch, hit with any speed, can knock my casters out of square. casters can get knocked out of alignment pretty easily depending on the chair. iād rather not have to pull out an allen wrench and a level, so iām gonna wheelie.
this happened when i hit about a 1.5ā lip on a pavement crack when i was going downhill at maybe 3mph.
6. putting it all together. see how diagonal this crack is?
this is another situation where i have to go straight relative to the slope. because that crack is wide, it will probably also require a wheelie. if i tried to approach that straight relative to the sidewalk, my left caster would get up the slope, iād wheelie, then my right caster would land in the crack. i have to go this way.
(also lol at the trash can blocking the curb cut)
these are just a few things to keep in mind when walking about with a wheelchair user! ofc the best strategy always is just to listen when someone asks you to move out of their way š but i think being able to anticipate movement a little better will help it seem less random. feel free to ask any questions!
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