horny books please

i tried writing separate reviews for Kiss of the Basilisk and Between Two Kings, but i found it hard to talk about one without mentioning the other. i'm going to avoid spoilers.

let's start with kiss of the basilisk. i actually enjoyed it a lot more than i thought. if you don't think about it too hard, it's some pretty great smut. the title of this series is literally "split or swallow" so idk what else one would expect. this book includes aspects of reality dating shows that I wasn't entirely expecting but found entertaining. the whole basilisk society is something that would only exist in a smutty romantasy novel that includes as much sex as possible. there were things that happened in this book that were honestly just insane and dumb and honestly, i'm not mad about it. as somebody who needed some really horny fantasy, i found this excellent.

now, was it perfect? absolutely not. i'm not a fan of the whole "20 year old MC dating an ancient being" trope. while the first book in the series makes it possible to kind of *forget* this fact to some extent, the second book really loves bringing it up and showcases just how problematic it is. the prince was kind of a pain in the ass at first, but i actually wound up liking him more than most folks whose reviews i read. maybe had something to do with him being slightly more age appropriate for the mc.

i'll admit that the ending falls kind of flat for me -- this is after reading the second book (which in some ways tries to replicate the format of the first to no success).

speaking of the second book. phew. the vibes were off for the whole thing. while the first book was a sexy, relatively light read, the second one was a BUMMER through and through. sure, there was still plenty of smut, but it wasn't nearly as fun or enjoyable. it might have been better if the characters didn't make every possible bad decision possible. there was also a lot of basilisk lore introduced that felt like its ONLY reason was to make the lives of these characters miserable, which felt pretty unnecessary. now, it wasn't all bad -- there were some interesting characters we got to meet in the basilisk world, but it still was NOT worth it.

my final thoughts:

don't bother with the second book.

DO bother with the first book if you're looking for some smut that will not make you think too hard.

GENERAL RATING: 1/5 stars

SMUT RATING: 2/5 stars (yes, there are a few spicey scenes, but they were underwhelming and felt unearned.)

this was not my first book from jensen. i had read through most of the bridge kingdom, but i genuinely can't remember if i dnf'd it or if i made it all the way through. just wasn't feeling the (painfully predictable) twists and turns.

speaking of painfully predictable, this book almost feel in that category. the only think keeping it from that was how vague and confusing some of it was, likely due to having an unreliable narrator. either way, the romance between bjorn and freya started off fun -- their banter was cute and flirty. however, i didn't really feel like their relationship was well developed. the MC felt very impulsive and didn't tend to think things through and, while that may have been an intentional character choice, it mostly just annoyed me.

WHERE'S THE SPICE? (light spoilers)

The first spicey scene is just over halfway through the book and is pretty nice -- while not much happens, it did a good job of building anticipation. I'd say the same with the second spicey scene. However, the final few chapters of this book were a whirlwind of disappointment. Yes, there is back-to-back sex towards the end of the book, but it comes after a... well, a really weird series of events that mostly just frustrated me with the story. The scene itself was actually pretty good, but it felt unearned in the context of the broader plot.

me? i'm a neurodivergent nonbinary adult with a whole ass job and loving partner. i occasionally gets a hankering to read some stupid, dumb, smutty romantasy. however, i like to think i have standards. so, what are those?

MY STANDARDS:

must be smutty. i need smut. if there's no smut, why am i reading it. this is going to be a key criteria i use when judging books.

consent is key. if a book has any kind of nonconsensual scenes, i will dnf it. that's not ok.

no jackasses. i guess this one is pretty subjective, but you'll hopefully see what i mean as I go on.