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polkadotmotmot

Summer Wheat - Refrigerator, 2026 - Acrylic paint and gouache on aluminum mesh

one of my friends posted this long instagram story about how she hates when "other queer people" reproduce and have biological children because it "just creates more suffering" and basically that we shouldn't bring more children into the world when there's already climate change and "overpopulation" and facism etc. and that we should all just be adopting instead. and it made me feel so upset. because first of all, i don't think creating life is inherently "creating suffering," and I think that's actually an absurd take. i love my life! i love being alive! i love the human experience! i love making art and being in love and having friends and eating fruit and listening to music and swimming in the ocean! i think giving someone life is like the greatest gift you can give. the idea that creating life is "creating suffering" is such a pessimistic view that I can't even wrap my mind around it. also, not to mention, "overpopulation" isn't even real.

i guess it just made me feel bad because i know people are going to think i'm selfish for the lengths i'm going to in order to have a child who is biologically mine. all the money and time and energy spent on finding a sperm donor and getting artificially inseminated. but i'm going to be selfish anyway. and people can think whatever they want. i'm going to bring a child into the world who is so loved and wanted and cared for and celebrated, and it is going to be the greatest and most difficult creative practice of my entire life, and it is going to be worth it. and i hope my child will grow up to love being alive as much as i do.

i randomly have a FIVE HOUR layover in DC so I'm going to take the metro into Alexandria to go to a yarn store lmao. even though I said no more buying yarn...... but i feel like this is a special occasion (the ocassion being that i have five hours to kill)

omnia-mors-aequat-nstrwa

"Shakespeare - Richard III" — David Gentleman (1976)

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i'm going to visit my family tomorrow and I'm feeling so stressed and anxious... whenever I visit my parents it's like. i'm stressed to visit them, and then i feel bad about the fact that visiting them is so stressful, so I become even more stressed. my brother has been straight up refusing to come for any family visits of any kind, and even said he won't be coming to christmas this year. i guess i could refuse too, i am an adult with autonomy... but i feel so guilty and i feel bad for my mom so i always end up going to see them out of a sense of obligation. it'll be fine and i'm only going for four nights and I'll get to see my grandparents and my cool cousin who I like. surely seeing family is important and worthwhile and a little bit of psychic damage from my parents won't kill me.

campsis

Anne Schillings, The West, 2023, Oil on canvas, 120 x 140 cm

thunderstruck9

Anne Schillings (Dutch, 1995)

ahalal-uralma

Artist: Errol Le Cain

holespoles

The Fairy Procession by Errol Le Cain (1941-1989)

when i was 18 i was like "i'll never work an OFFICE JOB where i just sit in some kind of boring OFFICE answering EMAILS all day" and now i'm like yayyyyy my cozy little office :) where i have a cozy desk and chair and get to sit in the AC answering emails all day :) i love closing the door to my office and being all alone in my office and listening to my podcasts in my office :) yippeeee office time :)

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theegoist

Jan Tarasin (Polish, 1926–2009) - Rain, Oil, canvas, 88 × 129 cm (1995)

i’m really not trying to be like a homesteader or anything intense like that, but i think i need to seriously step up my home-grown food situation. all these outbreaks of food borne illness and changes to FDA and environmental regulations around pesticides have me feeling anxious. i don’t think it’s possible to even come close to avoiding all environmental toxins, and i don’t want to waste my life and precious energy on such a fruitless goal. but i think it is a good idea to minimize exposure where you can. and i have a pretty big yard, two raised garden beds, landlord permission to build more beds, and a lot of friends and neighbors with gardening experience and advice. also, i live in a part of the country with tons of sunlight and a 12 month harvesting window. so like. i am very well-equipped to grow more of my own food than I am currently growing.

i think my biggest priorities right now will be: growing more leafy greens (which are the #1 carriers of food borne illness, and which i also eat a ton of), and then growing more beans and legumes (which grow very easily from seed and can be so bountiful and delicious).

worldsandemanations

Jessica Lisse (French, b. 1990) - Sirocco, pigment inks print on paper

dogpuppy

#just got gifted a bike and it is my first time having a bike since i was a child #it does kinda feel like this tbh #but also i'm so scared of cars that i can't calm down

really good north florida weekend! went to an estate sale at a beautiful old house out on a lake, then went swimming in said lake. spent too much money eating out because it’s too hot to cook. read a lot. enjoyed big thunderstorms. felt slow and warm and relaxed like an alligator.

i had planned to have some serious conversations with my girlfriend about our future, but honestly i was just not in the mood for all that… we were having so much fun and laughing and kissing and splashing in the water and eating a million cherries. everything felt so happy and light. there’s plenty of time to be serious, but it’s nice to just have fun sometimes :)

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hi!! please ignore this if it's too personal, but I remember you've posted about your budgeting journey and I think you mentioned that you had a template you really liked. do you have a link by any chance? I've realized I really need to get it together in that area of my life 😅

Hi! this is not too personal at all, i actually LOVE to talk about this topic and im happy to discuss it any time. for some reason debt payoff and budgeting has become my special interest. And knowing about money feels really empowering! Okay so here’s what I use:

1. For budgeting I use Monarch. It isn’t free, but it is worth it. First year is 50% off with my referral link (I promise this isn’t an MLM lol they just offer referral links) and then when I ended my first year I went to cancel and said it was too expensive and they offered me 50% off again!

It makes all these amazing charts that look like this (example from the internet, not my actual money):

Honestly, even if I had to pay full price ($100 a year) it would probably be worth it. I’ve never been able to manage spreadsheets or anything. Monarch makes it all so clear and so easy to understand where my money is going. It has honestly changed everything for me, i’m not even being dramatic.

2. If you have any debt, I strongly recommend the app Debt Payoff Planner. This one is free! And I can’t even imagine how I would have gotten out of debt without it. (I’m still in debt to be clear. But i’ve made a lot of progress.) It has these really satisfying data visualizations of how much you’ve paid off and how much interest you’ll be saving if you pay more, and you can compare various plans and approaches. It has been so motivating for me! I even emailed the developers once with a question and they were like the nicest and most helpful people ever.

You could probably do all of this in Excel for free, but I am a visually-minded person and i have found that being able to see everything happening with my money helps me to understand it more.

Good luck on your budgeting journey!! It takes some trial and error but it is totally worth it.

djshahh-deactivated20240305

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just some thoughts