we can just dance to this.

I think I’ll be the most fun president this school has ever seen, if that’s what you’re asking. 

I’m going to start thinking up mean nicknames for you too, Stinkvie. I don’t know a lot about college social norms yet, but I’m pretty sure bringing a high schooler to a party would be the opposite of having the coolest arm candy in the room. Also, even if people did think you were cool enough to be around for longer than 5 seconds, I don’t and likablity is a very important factor when choosing a plus one!

Wow. Stinkvie. Sick burn. They don’t have to know I’m a high schooler! I’m 18, I’ll blend right in, that’s what I’m saying. Fine, if that’s how you really feel, then I’ll find someone else to give me the 2020 Freshman year experience I deserve. Think your cousins would be down? 

It is not a skunk stripe! Skunk stripes go down the back and my streaks are in the front. Anyway, clearly you’re going to miss me if you spent the summer thinking of new ways to make fun of me. Obsessed much? Also part of my hair is still pink, so I’d MUCH rather be called Pinkie Pie than Skunk Stripe. Why should I sneak you into parties? What would I get out of it? Other than annoyed?

Whatever you say, Pepe le Pew. Ignoring the rest of that to say that sneaking me into parties would give you the coolest arm candy in the room! Everyone will be charmed by your choice of guest and invite you back with hopes that you’ll bring more cool guests. Or that you’ll just keep bringing me. 

Oh, you see...Because I’m mentally seven years old and that means I like her and want to smooch her under the jungle gym. 

...What? That’s a lie. 

Sounds unlikely, especially since I should NOT be your perfect target! Especially since I’m not even happy we’re officially at different schools. It’s such a bummer that you’re really stuck being a high school baby for another year when the rest of us will get to go to all the cool college parties without having to practically babysit you to make sure you don’t get the sudden urge to pour bubble liquid in everyone’s drinks or something else equally heinous.

Awwww, Skunk Stripe, you’re gonna miss me! Which, by the way, your new hair is cute and all but over the summer I devised a whole plan to start calling you Pinkie Pie. It was going to be a huge thing and I was so excited to torture you with it, but now you went and became an e-girl. So now my dream is crushed, and Skunk Stripe it is. Anyway, I’m 18, sneak me into the parties! No one needs to know I’m still slumming it in the WHS halls and I would never give myself away by wasting bubble liquid like that. 

You don’t think they’re worth the effort? If I could horse whisper I’d make sure they knew that! But I don’t have your same talents, so I’ll just treat them the way I always do instead. I kind of like having a quiet place to go to get away from it all, though; Walt’s so different now, the big city vibe can get overwhelming. It just makes the barn even more of a safe haven than ever.

Look, I never chose the horse life -- the horse life chose me. I’m sure if I did decide to stop volunteering I’d miss them and all, but it’s about to finally be my senior year. I gotta focus on me. And maybe that means going at least once a week to make sure everything’s going smoothly. How’s your uh...pelvis, by the way? 

Pow pow, liar! You’d lie about something like this because you’re literally the spawn of Satan and you thrive off creating unnecessary chaos. The horses probably have nothing but very kind things to say and you’re totally taking advantage of their inability to sue you for lying.

Or because I’ve given up my satan-spawning and therefor need an outlet for all of my evil, mischievous thoughts and you are the perfect target. Aren’t you happy we’re officially at different schools? 

Sounds fake, feels fake! Especially since I do not believe they’d think Reindeer are stupid. Reindeer are better than everything and I just refuse to believe horses are haters like that.

Hey, don’t shoot the messenger! I’m just sharing what I’ve heard straight from the source. Why would I lie about something like this? 

The more you call whatever it is you do Horse Whispering, the more I’m convinced you really are in those stables whispering all your weird evil secrets into their little horse ears.

I don’t have any evil secrets! i listen to their evil secrets. You know, like how they think reindeer are stupid. 

“I don’t think so? But there’s someone here with blue hair? Right after I changed mine to pink? Bummer, I could’ve made a blue buddy.” Hollie mused obliviously, walking up from behind Stefan twirling a lock of freshly dyed valentine pink hair around her index finger. “Have you met your date yet or is she like, missing missing? Either way, it shouldn’t be that hard to find a blue head. I got lost at the zoo once and it only took my parents like ten minutes to find me.”

Stefan hardly recognized the voice of the girl walking alongside him, and almost went along with this conversation until he looked down. It was Hollie herself. Stopping in his tracks, Stefan put his fingers on the bridge of his nose. “Hollie...” he began, sucking in a deep breath. “You mean to tell me I’ve been looking around for blue hair and I -- “ His words turned into a frustrated groan. “Hollie, you’re my date. I rigged it. And had I known you’d dyed your hair, I actually would’ve met you at our meet-up spot instead of assuming that I would find you on my own.” 

Kristina: And they say true romance is dead. Have you really not gotten any other hobbies besides Hollie yet? :-p And I have people. But are they worthy of my eternal ghost following them around? To be determined still. I'd probably rather haunt like, Kylie Jenner or something than my friends.