ofstarharborâ:
Rowanâs tone is icier than the chill coming off the ocean air. It cuts into her deep, and Helena is more hurt by it than she has any right to be. She has no right to be upset about what Rowan says or does in the face of everything she has said and done, but thereâs no helping it. Thereâs no helping the vicious ache in her heart, or the way it still whispers about the feelings Helena has failed to move on from for the past few years.
She still longs for her. Helena can try to deny it all she wants, but she does. âI wasnât⌠I didnât think it was because of me.â It was the last thing on her mind, but she doesnât blame Rowan for thinking it. Sheâs always been so self involvedâit makes her sick to her stomach to think of all the times she shoved people under the bus to better herself. Rowan worst of all. âBut youâre right, itâs none of my business.â As much as she wishes she could just leave it at that and walk away, she canât. âI justâI hope youâve been doing okay.â She regrets the words the second they come out of her mouth, and selfishly, she hopes for the backlash of a lifetime. God knows she deserves it.
There is a brief moment when her mask drops. A hint of uncertainty flashes across her features, and Rowan wonders if she can even bear to allow herself to trust Helenaâs words. Itâs so quick, almost subconsciousâa yearning for something they used to share. She hates herself for it. After everything sheâs been through, she has to be some sort of masochist to want anything to do with the girl standing in front of her.
âWell, Iâm alive.â The icy edge of her voice dulls, taking on a forced nonchalance that would be laughable if she werenât so upset. While part of her wants to unleash the full force of her fury, the other part feels itâs better to keep her intense emotions under wraps. Itâs taken her years to bury the memories deep enough to even survive the hurricane that followed the rumors that effectively ruined her high school career. It would take only moments for her to be drowning once more, swept up in an unforgiving undertow. Against her best judgment, her feet stay rooted in place. âIâm surprised youâre still in town. I always figured youâd go off to some fancy college and become a city girl.âÂ













