Small, gay, and full of anxiety.

it’s amazing how women are able to navigate crowded rooms without ever touching a palm to a man’s lower back

Kid with a bluey backpack on the flight to Sydney this must be his mecca

That's absolutely insane.

As much as I think it would be fun to have emotive anthropomorphic ears, I also recognize I can barely control my facial expressions. Like hell can I keep from Angry Ears-ing during meetings

i think the most upsetting thing about american-flavor puritanism is how fucking patronizing it is. it's 2026 but the whole world still has to deal with a cultural hegemony grown from the gnarled vestiges of victorian-era paternalism. tax-paying adults with passports and the right to vote are treated like wayward children because of the antiquated idea that authorities must protect the weak minds of the unwashed masses from depravity and corruption. the average american can send a fellow citizen to the chair, but they can't piss in a ditch without being declared an outlaw. american entertainment media is saturated with sex, but you can't talk about it online without getting your account suspended. it's such blatant censorship at a universal scale, but because sexual content is framed as inherently dangerous, this restriction on basic adult autonomy, this blanket denial of moral and intellectual adulthood, can be reframed as protection, an expression of care, a moral duty. "won't someone think of the children!" I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN! I AM A GROWN MAN!

It’s actually not that impressive if you can train a malinois. Their whole deal is being trainable. Come back when you can train a basset hound to do all that

Fabio!!!

once I snorted a fat line of nuance and everything started depending. watch out

girl with ptsd voice: hey, so something really bad is gonna happen, right? you guys are picking up on that too, yeah? The other shoe is about to drop, I just know it.

Just met a woman who was like “oh your dog is so nice” and then her daughter said “our puppy is mean. He bit the trainer on his weenie” I was like 😦

It’s important to note that apparently the weenie-biter in question was a 10-month-old golden doodle named Robert

*trying to pitch public transportation to Americans* it’s like a legal form of texting while driving