❝30 texts to send to my muse:❞ | Sentence Starter
[ text ]: I woke up to a half empty bottle of cider on my dresser. I drank it and have no regrets. Morning.
[ text ]: I’d ask why there’s pictures of Kayne West all over my bedroom floor but I don’t actually want an answer at this point.
[ text ]: I can hear your life falling apart through the ceiling. Shut up.
[ text ]: I just googled ‘Rarest Pepe’ and I’m crying.
[ text ]: I just brought the Spice Girls Greatest Hits.
[ text ]: I’ve had nothing to do all day so I’ve been learning the lyrics to ‘Trap Queen’.
[ text ]: Be proud of drunk me. I managed to only eat HALF of a large pizza this time.
[ text ]: We all got really drunk and communally agreed Bucky Barnes was a ‘cute little button babe’.
[ text ]: What a massive egotistical penis.
[ text ]: Does today require people clothes or can I just wear my pyjamas?
[ text ]: I’m certain he heard me shout and LOUDLY ‘nap time comes before pants time’.
[ text ]: I’m not responding to this because I have died. I’m dead. Dead people don’t answer texts.
[ text ]: I think I’m going to retire and become a hermit.
[ text ]: I want Lucky Charms.
[ text ]: I’m not surprised he didn’t show up. He didn’t arrange it.
[ text ]: I miss hugging you and smelling your hair (in a non-weird way!).
[ text ]: Why are you saved in my phone as ‘Prison Wife’?
[ text ]: I was in the middle of a check-up and the doctor quoted Jurrassic Park at me.
[ text ]: I replaced your apple juice with whiskey six months ago.
[ text ]: Why did you send me pictures of yourself dressed in all of my coats?
[ text ]: I’ve watched so much Peppa Pig I am reaching my point of insanity.
[ text ]: What a complete ball of Human-shaped trash.
[ text ]: You need to stop shouting about Communism in public places.
[ text ]: I was just legitimately asked if Human was a form of meat.
[ text ]: The Devil has a British accent.
[ text ]: You kept making train noises all night. Are you okay?
[ text ]: I just brought some muscle cream and I smell like a herb garden.
[ text ]: I think our neighbour may have gone rabid.
[ text ]: I realise we were joking at the time but are you considering a stripping career?
[ text ]: I don’t want to go out today. I’d rather wear wet socks all day.
titsay
romaincrisis
yousharknotpass
