Squidaped-Oyt @squidaped-oyt - Tumblr Blog

For my birthday my best friend got me a set of glasses that, when you stack them, look like a fish! Genius!

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garaks-padded-cell

I have an absolutely massive russian guy as my driving instructor rn

Whenever i get into his car i have to spend an embarrassing 3 minutes adjusting everything back into clown car proportions so i can fit. Anyways a couple lessons ago he had me do the same route over and over to practice and there was a dead seagull in the middle of the road at one point and to keep correct positioning on the road i was required to drive over its carcass like 19 times just goring this seagull until the 20th lap when my instructor looked at the seagull that now more resembled tomato soup than a bird and said "this time. you spare seagull" and so i did and then he said "incorrect positioning on road"

garaks-padded-cell

Artists rendition

garaks-padded-cell

I had my last lesson with this guy a second ago and when we passed a dog on the path he said, apropos of nothing, "dog die? I feel nothing."

theotherpacman

not all ships are For wanting them to be in a happy healthy relationship together. sometimes shipping two characters means you want them to be erotically obsessed with each other and become entwined in a mutually toxic love affair for a few months and then horrifically break each other's hearts and never speak again. sometimes you want them to be codependent best friends with enough repression to explode a submarine who only make out/have sex when they're at their worst. sometimes you want them to pine after each other for years, never say anything, and then die. sometimes you want them to kill each other. this, too, is shipping

#somehow sidestep manages to potentially achieve this with every love interest #only to be expected from a game that lets you set up a truly insane situation where you can catfish multiple characters #including your own ex #in a stolen brain dead body you're telepathically controlling and puppeting like a flesh mech to assist your various schemes and crimes #and then lets sidestep potentially get jealous OF THE PUPPET #who they are controlling!#game of all time #fallen hero

just-a-nowhere-giirl

A series of greatest hits from possibly one of my favorite parody accounts on anything ever.

surprisinglyironlibrarian

Truly wild way to start a paragraph.

#lmao

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so-much-for-subtlety

lesbian-moon-gf

Girl you are an obligate carnivore

humedetector

but her appel

warframestuff

The Hunra in Warframe: Tau

#warframe #adis ...#;_;#tau is going to rip my heart out i can feel it in my bones

carnival-phantasm

In love with this random guy who had a lock slapped on his storage unit for not paying its rental and not only did he ignore management and took his stuff out without paying, but also chose to steal the lock itself and send it to the LockPickingLawyer along with a confession letter

carnival-phantasm

X

we-are-ninja

@theoutcastrogue

chibikuroneko13

cant believe you didnt include the full sentence

foone

People always focus on the "lockpicking" part of his name and ignore that the lockpicking lawyer is, indeed, a lawyer, and can tell you exactly which crimes you committed in getting this lock to him

terramythos

i got a spam email at work from a company begging for business and i think they meant to put 'To Whom It May Concern' at the start but whatever LLM or translation software they used did not work so instead it says 'Dear Concerned, Good Day,'

terramythos

i've been saying 'Dear Concerned' all fucking day man

Started playing Redout fresh on the Switch as an occasional break from Warframe. I forgot you have to unlock all the base game race courses through completing them in career mode to use them in solo/quickrace mode.

Luckily you do still unlock the track and get XP and some money even if you don't win a race, so my career as the most godawful space racing pilot ever is still limping along somehow

#the only in universe justification i can think of for me still being allowed to race is that i have become the haru urara of the srrl #i really only care about quickrace mode tbh #career bores me and the ai blatantly cheating aggravates me #i'll never play the game online with other people #i just want to go fast without having to worry about trivial things like winning lmao #and redout lets you go Very Fast

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skippyisntfunny

bisexual-engineer-girl

Pulitzer Prize type shit

wizardshark

Why's this dude built like crash bandicoot

spooky-narwhal

Everything about this damn post is so funny to me. The lighting of the arm from the flash. The posing of the arm like a dramatic death from a novella. The fact the photo somehow got taken still and looks this good. The subreddit name. The fact this guy really is built like crash bandicoot

#lmao

marxism-transgenderism

REMEMEBER IF HARD WATER IS CAUSING CALCIUM BUILDUP IN YOUR BONG, JUST LET SOME WHITE VINEGAR SIT IN THAT THING FOR A FEW MINUTES AND SHE'LL BE LOOKIN BRAND NEW. JUST DONT SMOKE WEED WOTH THE VINEGAR INSIDE PLEASE

marxism-transgenderism

I am not nearly advanced enough to come away from such a maneuver unscathed

railjacks

biggest and most insane waste of warframe 1999 is that they get neil newbon, astarion's VA, in the booth to voice a hot shirtless megalomaniacal egotist who complains about his meditation being disturbed and yells at his subordinates for bothering him about problems they should just throw paratroopers at. and then they do nothing with him??? his literal only role is to be hot and evil and yell at you from a tiny comms picture-in-picture on-screen. there's a rapier skin which is purportedly his personally commissioned rapier which he never ONCE uses in game to duel you dramatically. he doesn't even have the rapier! his only violence on-screen is roughing up a morally ambiguous gay grandpa during an interrogation, which is also his only actual full-body appearance in the game.

luckily he gets a way WAY meatier role elsewhere in the game, with a lot more dramatic heft to it. voicing this fish:

#warframe #lmao

kidzbopdeathgrips

following people who are into wrestling is just like "holy shit johnny appleseed just hit burner hurtzog (evil artfilm director-themed wrestler) with the Prostate Puncher 5000! can't fucking stand that guy!" like all day long

wunderwirker

orange-catsidy

brxdyking

Shenanigans afoot in Sanctum Anatomica

#warframe #this is not my beautiful house this is not my beautiful wife #i don't even OWN these cosmetics and my drifter and operator look nothing like this #the game just randomly decided to assign me someone else's appearance for some reason i guess???#so yeah if you saw someone briefly freak out in the sanctum chat the other night that was me lmao

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