On A Map Half-Written

A lot of internet-famous people--guy who can pick any lock, guy who can make anything out of chocolate, guy who can drink lots of water without spilling a drop--are like characters a five-year-old would make up for a comic book.

Good morning to spinal surgeons, former paraplegics, women on the run from a murder charge, con men from Southern states, professional torturers, businessmen raised by fishermen, Koreans who speak English but pretend they don’t, cursed lottery winners, Catholic rock stars, Australians who like peanut butter, lifeguards who can’t do CPR, ballerinas with mean stepmothers, estranged fathers and sons reconnecting with each other, and yellow Labrador retrievers

imagine being a dog and you think your chances are pretty good. and then you look over and there's Mitski getting her wallet out

We’re all having a midlife crisis leave us be

You never know what color pallette someone's Tumblr is till ppl are screenshotting posts and tags

Oh wow.

Some people on tumblr are reading ancient scrolls and you'd never know

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

thy mother

Art thou for fucking real

Further Ryland Grace for Tumblr Sexyman 2026 propaganda, allegedly Ryan Gosling has turned down People’s Sexiest Man of the Year spread multiple times because he thinks it’s cringe, so I think it would be really funny if we, the people, democratically elected him the People’s Sexyman