Santa

it’s not a phase

it’s the way that she combs my hair

not sure i can deal with this

up all night again this week

breaking things that i should keep

i definitely don’t want to be with him. not that he’s a bad person or something, of course not. he’s great. i like his atmosphere, his jokes, his eyes. oh, i adore the way he looks at me.

i’ve been with people who looked at me with desire and lust. with people who looked at me with complete acceptance and love. but his look is different. it’s calm and worm. his eyes are grey. i like grey. when he looks at me, i feel butterflies throwing a festival in his honor. yes, his eyes are amazing. and if eyes are a mirror of a soul, then he’s an amazing person. when he glances at me when he sings, i feel something fantastic. he looks cool when he sings. he looks like a very confident musician who loves what he’s doing and knows his craft well.

we shouldn’t meet too often, you know. i like missing him. it’s a feeling of light sadness that’s easy to fix, but it gives me inspiration and memories to remember before i fall asleep. anyway, very often we meet in my dreams. see you tonight, dear.

“may i kiss you, may just hug

everyone has their obsession

consuming thoughts, consuming time

they hold high their prized possession

that defines the meaning of their lives

there are objects of affection

that can mesmerize the soul

there is always one addiction

that just can not be controlled

уже долгое время у меня нет ломки. я чувствую себя нормально, могу жить. но слишком часто появляется навязчивое желание пустить тебя по вене, втереть в дёсны, капнуть тебя на маленькую бумажку и положить под язык. или сделать из тебя дорожку и занюхать. чтобы вставило сильнее, но короче по времени. или может просто завернуть в бумагу для самокруток и скурить. или попросить 0,6, оплатить и выпить залпом.

хотя какая к черту разница, если в любом случае сначала будет очень хорошо, а потом - очень плохо. может, после этого я даже буду жить спокойно какое-то время. а потом захочу тебя опять, ещё сильнее.

unfortunately the great mistake was made. we can try to forget about it, but i’m not sure if want to.

you really know how to make me cry

when you give me those ocean eyes

i'm scared

i've never fallen from quite this high

falling into your ocean eyes

those ocean eyes

“when you sleep, your dream world is as real to you as life, isn't it?”

“thought is real. physical is the illusion. ironic, huh?”

i think about you very often. well, i don’t really think about you, you’re just somewhere in the back of my mind. but like always.

every time i get a second of privacy, i imagine us. i know it’s not right and stuff. but probably i imagine us not in a romantic kind of way.

i dream of our freindship. i guess i just wish we were peers. now you’re an adult and stuff, but imagine how amazing it would be to hang out with each other without having to think about work and other parts of life that adults have.

i imagine how we go all these places around with a couple of beers. and it’s so weird that i feel like it would make me happy. i don’t need you to hold me in your arms or kiss underneath a million stars, i just wanna be your friend. of course, friends sometimes can kiss and swim with no clothes on. all friends do this, right?

where are you going, where you running to?

hey little monster, you know it's all okay

i’m gonna love ya, no matter what you say

hey little creature,

tell me what's on your mind,

where've you been hiding?

and can I come this time?

so pleased to please ya

and rip that heart off your sleeve,

what we discover

i've got love on my fingers

lust on my tongue

you say you got nothing,

so come out and get some

heartache to heartache,

i'm your wolf, i'm your man

i say run little monster

ты был счастливый и пьяный

и что-то важное между

я держу тебя за руку

и все расплывается

успокой меня заново

мне ужасно нравится

как ты выглядишь в этой

нелепой шапочке

эта грустная сага

никогда не закончится

мне не надо и надо

ты мое одиночество

я не драматизирую

yes, you still are. everything changes, circumstances, emotions, thoughts. but not this.

bad news - one of us is gonna lose. and i don’t think it’s going to be me. i just don’t have anything to lose, you know.

i’m the powder, you’re the fuse, just add some friction. it’s not love. it will never be love. and it never has been. it’s lust, desire, appetite. everything in our relationship led to this moment - i wake up and grasp that i just had another dream about you. and that’s why i’m so turned on.

don’t ask questions, you don’t wanna know. you don’t wanna know what i want to do with you. because it’s illegal.

i take what i want when i wanna. we’re both stuck in this situation where everything is obvious. the difference between us is that you need to hold on to common sense, i don’t. and i want ya.

it burns like a gin and i like it. i’m doing something wrong. i really shouldn’t be doing this. i feel that i’m the bad guy. and it’s one of the best feelings i’ve ever had. hurts but i know how to hide it. calm down. grab a beer. let yourself go. of course we won’t do it again.

[ i never had nobody touch me like i'm glass

you had me spinning in the midnight summer grass

i never had nobody touch me like I'm glass

with a moon burnt kiss ]

[ i felt forever when i laid upon your chest

forever when you said i look my best

i felt forever when i laid upon your chest

in the august light ]

[ can we go back to the world we had?