Hi!

I’m going to respond only on this ask because I’m guessing you’re the same anon because the other asks say the same thing. 

First of all, I want to say this: I feel you. I really do. I’m mad too. However, I’ve watched this movie too many times and I managed to pick up on some things about Tony’s grief throughout Endgame. While I agree they should’ve put more of Tony’s grief on Endgame, I think RDJ made a great job at showing Tony’s emotions regarding Peter. This man is so talented with his eyes and expressions, it’s incredible. 

Let’s look at Tony’s fears first. This is the man that constantly feared for Peter’s life on a daily basis since meeting him. He lived with this fear of losing him for two years of his life.

And his fears became a reality in IW. He lost. This is Tony Stark, he doesn’t give up. He tries and tries and he never rests until he gets things done. Until everything is alright. In this movie, he actually gives up. After losing Peter, he finally gave up. This is where the “Peter’s death is going to change him forever” comes to play. He changed.

Throughout IW, Tony went fear after fear, impact after impact on each scene. He was living a never-ending nightmare. One that he already had an idea on how it was going to end.

 Remember this scene? Strange told Tony that If it comes to saving him or the kid or the Time Stone, he wasn’t going to hesitate to let either of them die. And this is Tony’s reaction:

(YES, I actually made gifs for this)

He knows what’s at stake. He doesn’t really care about his life, he’s thinking about Peter here. He’s aware that Peter might die and right after this, he makes the kid an avenger because what else can he do? And the rest of the movie is just like that. Him fearing for Peter’s life over and over again. 

Until Peter actually dies at the end and his worst nightmare comes true. Keep in mind that this is the first time we see Tony Stark cry. This is the first time this man cries after all the things he’s been through.

Now, the first thing he says after he comes back is “I lost the kid”. Tony, again, didn’t care about his well-being, he was thinking about Peter. Thinking and repeating in his head the horrific nightmare over and over again. This is exactly what was on his mind the whole time he was on that ship. He desperately looks at Steve, trying to make him understand his loss. 

Notice here how he avoids looking at Peter’s picture. This right here is what triggers him to lash out on Steve, to call Steve a liar, telling him he needed him and that he doesn’t have any options for him anymore because they lost. Because he lost. Because he feels like there’s nothing left to do. 

He then marries Pepper and ta-da! Morgan. He cuts ties with the Avengers for 5 years and tries to live his life as peaceful as he can. Then Scott and the others come to his house and ask him for help with time travel stuff and Tony is in perpetual denial the whole time. This is his reaction when Natasha says there’s a possibility to bring everyone back.

What is interesting for me in this scene is that Tony is the one that told Steve that he lost Peter and in this part, he’s telling him that he’s got his second chance right here (Morgan), who do you think it was his first chance? Peter. He’s looking at Steve like he’s trying to make him understand. He told Steve he lost someone with as much importance as Morgan already and is very clear that he’s scared. Natasha said it herself. 

Then this happens: 

He starts getting hope. Since this part, he starts letting that same fear he felt those two years between hoco and iw come back. This is his reaction at the prospect of actually getting an opportunity once again. 

Then he tells Pepper about it and she tells him they were really lucky and that not many people got that opportunity and he says this: “I can’t help everyone” which can easily translate to this = “I couldn’t help him, I failed him”. 

He then tells Pepper that he can stop it right there and I just want to say, this is Pepper, the same woman who tried to make him give up the suits and the superhero life a bunch of times. This is coming from her: “But would you be able to rest?” I bet he hasn’t really slept much in those 5 years. And the answer is on his face:

No, he won’t be able to rest. He can’t.

And then throughout the whole process of time travel, you can see he’s starting to get his hopes up. This is him when Clint confirmed that time travel worked: 

And this: This breaks my heart. This hopeful smile.

This is him when he managed to get the stones on his gauntlet. The relief on his face is heartbreaking. He is getting his boy back. Finally. They’re so close.

This part is very important and you might not see it well in here but maybe when the HD version is available you might be able to catch on his expression. When Thanos says he’s going to create a new world, one teeming with life that knows not what it has lost but only what it has been given. A grateful universe. The contempt, the rage, the grief, and the fear are back at full force. This is the alien that killed his kid, the last time Tony saw him Thanos wiped out his kid out of existence. 

Then after EVERYTHING, he finally gets his kid back and he can’t even believe it. And no, it was not necessary to kill him but this is the face of a man that knows he can finally rest. He got Peter back and that was the most important thing to him.

Peter + t-shirts 

What am I?