Dating an autistic person is wild. She just railed me, rolled over and opened the flight rising tag on Tumblr.

WRONG BLOG

@sherlocktheravencat

"if i had a time machine I'd kill [politician]" bitch you don't need the time machine. what's done is already done. there's politicians out there Right Fucking Now, and this is unrelated, but if you live in the usa there's at least ONE gun at your local walmart. end post

DISCLAIMER this is satire and if something happens i am going to dig a hole in my backyard

“If I had time travel I’d kill Hitler” “If I had time travel I’d stop my favourite politician getting assassinated” you’re all thinking way too small. If I had time travel I’d stop Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin from dying on the moon due to Soviet sabotage, kicking off the Great Nuclear War and devastating half of the planet.

Good Job.

do you think no one else has time travel

Happy one month anniversary to this post that has not allowed me a single day of fucking peace since I made it.

wow if only you had a time machine

Honestly having reached a billion notes I think it’s safe to say that in the Year of our lord 2041, this is the most popular tumblr post out there.

I’m killing your parents before you’re born

:)

Still here, why’d you hesitate @derinthescarletpescatarian

Your mum’s ability to hold up under active gunfire was really hot. I’m your dad now.

Isn’t that the plot of Terminator

Where do you think the plot for Terminator came from?

This is such a classic trainwreck post that has the vibes of a 2014 screenshot posted to Pinterest and then the last addition is just last Tuesday I can’t even

Imagine how I feel

This post is a goldmine

This post is an eagle that has a taste for my liver

Prometheus’ eagle had to get the idea from somewhere.

This is not a drill. Trump wanted to seize power last time he was president but he failed. This time he and GOP allies have put together a better plan so he won't fail. Vote blue all the way down the ballot to save democracy. Abstaining or voting third party helps the GOP's plan to create a fascist dictatorship. This is literally a matter of life or death. If everyone gets out and votes they can be defeated. Otherwise the United States will be plunged into the horrors of dictatorship. The lives and safety of everyone you hold dear are on the line.

do you ever get The Impulse to change so that someone will like you better but then that person goes "i like you the way you always are" so it's like okay now i have The Impulse to never ever change and somehow that one's even worse in practice because stalling your life will inevitably change you as a person. oohhh my kitties came near meeee

LIKE. The Impulse is bullshit. you have to change for yourself, otherwise your life won't depend on you. but i think just the sight of it is very funny

i will die without routine. also this routine is killing me